Wishes
Disclaimer: I don't own LOST.
"I asked you not to come back here for me and I wish…."
There were so many ways Jack could finish that sentence. So many things had gone wrong in his life and it looked like that wasn't going to change anytime soon.
Jack wished he could have fixed his relationship with his father. If only he could have stopped his father from drinking. If only he had tried just a little harder, maybe his father would still be alive.
Jack wished that Sarah hadn't come into his life. If only had hadn't been the doctor on duty that day. He would have never had to fix her, he would have never fallen in love with her.
Jack wished that he hadn't concentrated so much on work. Maybe then Sarah wouldn't have left him.
Jack wished that he wouldn't fail all of the time. If only he succeeded, just once, he might have a little more faith in himself.
Jack wished that Boone, Shannon, Ana, and Libby hadn't died. If only he had done more, if could have been there quicker, maybe some of them could have been saved.
Jack wished that he could have spent more time with Kate. If only he had told her how he felt sooner, if only he had let the other survivors take care of themselves more, maybe Kate wouldn't have been in Sawyer's arms that night.
He could spend hours thinking of the If only's, and I wishes, but he knew he didn't regret getting on the island, and he didn't regret meeting her.
Above all, Jack wished that he would tell Kate how he really felt right then, but something stopped him.
And as Jack finished his sentence, he tried to tell himself that he wasn't lying. "I wish that you hadn't."
Jack stood up and started to walk way, but he bent down and put a hand on Kate's back as he whispered in her ear. "But I will come back here for you."
Jack straightened up and headed for the door. He reached for the doorknob and closed his eyes. He hated leaving her but he knew he had to leave before his feelings got the best of him. He turned the knob, and left the room.
Kate wished he hadn't left, and she wished she hadn't stayed.
