A/N: This is a guest chapter that Nursie61 was kind enough to let me write for her story Scarred Roots.
I tried to mimic her style for this chapter, so it's slightly different than my others. It does sort of drop off, and I may write more later, but for now 16 pages is all that will come naturally.
This chapter is meant to come after New Year's Eve… maybe around Februrary.
"Hetch-erHUMP!" Remus sneezed heavily, blowing his nose for what seemed like the hundredth time
that since the heavy weight of illness had settled upon him during the night. He did not get ill often, but when he did it was generally crippling. Dora had seen him with a cold before, but that was an annoyance, something that he could ignore and convince her to do the same. When he was really ill however, he was nearly completely useless. He was vulnerable, and the others treated him as such. When he was conscious, he hated the entire ordeal. When he was not it was worse. So much worse.
He had barely finished the thought before, "Heh-huh…uhuh… Ehhh… ETCHSHUMP!" He blew his nose with a congested honk, and tried to figure out how to explain the odd spectacle that transpired whenever he had the misfortune to fall ill. Sirius and Harry always pitched in to try to make him feel better – to make the situation less horrible than it was. But, there was always a strangled tension in the air – like they thought that he would spiral back into his darker days, simply because he was unable to tap into any part of his healthy self.
"Morning, sneezy," Sirius said, wiping the sleep out of his eyes. "Allergies?" he asked, sitting down next
to Remus on the couch. As soon as the bleariness cleared from his eyes, he realized that it couldn't be
the case. Remus looked terrible. His nose was raw, red, and runny. His eyes were bloodshot. And, his
face was so pale that had it not been for his fever stained cheeks, he would have thought that Remus
was going to pass out.
"Flu," Remus answered with a cough. "Don't get too close. Can't have the primary bread winner getting
sick." He suppressed a few coughs, making his sore throat ache, and doing nothing to cease the tickle. "Ehhh… ETCHSHUMP! Ugh…" He breathed through his mouth, his sinuses having become clogged with the force of the sneeze. Trying to blow his nose a bit, he gave up when his ears popped and his jaw crackled. He tried to stretch his aching muscles, but they seemed to constrict any time he moved even the slightest way out of place. Just the simple act of stretching leeched his energy right out of him.
His heart pounding in his sinuses made him feel like they were eternally buzzing. He ran a boyish finger
under his raw, dripping nose and withdrew it as another sneeze exploded out of him. "Heh-EH- KESSSH!
Ugh," he groaned with a deep breath. He leaned back on the couch, coughing as the airflow to his lungs
changed.
He worried about what Dora would say. Even though she had been so accepting, so forgiving, during Christmas and New Years, everyone had a breaking point. Even her.
He forced a groan back. It was bad enough that he was symptomatic. But, Sirius was the complainer when he was sick. And, even though Remus felt like rot, he wouldn't do that to them. They had enough to deal with – just him being him every day. He couldn't let them think that he was bad enough off to complain. He hated seeing that worried look in Harry's eyes.
Sirius tilted his head to the side and was about to say something when Harry came in.
"Morning," Harry said, coming into the living room, dressed and looking quite put out. "There's no
breakfast," he pointed out, confused. This was a break from routine, and while he teased his uncle about it, the reality of the situation was that it had him worried.
Sirius was about to answer when…
"HAR-OOFFCHH!" The loud, wet sneeze seemed to come from the very core of Remus' being, tossing
him forward haphazardly, causing Sirius to put a hand out to gently catch Remus' shoulder. He carefully guided his friend back to the angle he had been sitting at in order to prevent any calamities from befalling him. Remus grunted a response, which was as close as he was able to get to thanking the man whom he knew would not let him fall.
Harry's face fell. "Uncle Remus, are you okay?" His voice was quieter than it had been. It had been many years since his uncle had fallen ill, and at that point he had barely crawled from his bedroom the whole time.
Remus looked at him apologetically, his heart breaking as he saw that worried look that he hated written all over Harry's face.
"He's sick, Harry," Sirius said slowly. Remus didn't get sick often, and when he did it was worth noting.
They would have to be more gentle with him than normal, and make certain that he didn't do anything
too taxing.
"Thanks for not giving us the plague then. Plague pancakes doesn't sound as appetizing as potato ones,"
Harry said, going back into the kitchen. He had decided to make breakfast, and he knew they had some
potatoes left over from dinner earlier in the week.
Remus huffed out a laugh. "I'll be better by dinner," he said, with a small cough. "Don't burn the kitchen down, laddie," he tried to tease, but by the end of the sentence he was confused and disoriented.
Sirius gave him a look that clearly implied that he didn't believe him, but that he wasn't going to argue
with him either. Remus had been through enough in his lifetime to know his limitations, and Sirius knew better than to doubt him verbally.
Dating Remus had happened so easily that Dora had barely noticed it. She looked forward to coming home to the little family who had so readily accepted her. Once she had started sleeping next to Remus, she noticed that she basically power napped through the night, ready to be awake at a moment's notice if that's what he needed. She had become accustomed to the way he moved at night, and the differences between when he held her to comfort her and when he held her to comfort himself.
Oddly, it was the best sleep that she could ever recall getting – possibly because it was the first time in her life that she felt completely safe while she was asleep. She pitied the person who made him feel threatened – or make him feel that she was being threatened. If there was ever a break in and her crazy cousin didn't get to them first, Remus would have no trouble handling it. And she would have no trouble handling him after.
Sirius had called her to bring home pizza, something that she knew that Remus only rarely readily allowed. She had agreed to pick up the pizzas, but was nervous about what might be happening at home, so she picked up some wings and a salad, just to make it look like she was trying to feed Harry healthy food. Herself, she would be just as happy with a bowl of cereal, even though Remus would never allow for it.
"Honeys I'm home!" she called, as she maneuvered herself in the door, careful not to drop the sodas, even though she had left the food in the car. The door banged open and she winced, once again forgetting until it was too late that their door was lighter than the door at her apartment.
Harry appeared, seemingly from nowhere and frowned when he saw her.
"The pizzas are in the car," she assured him. "Four pies, buffalo wings, fries and salad."
"Wow," the boy responded, his eyes getting wide as he nearly sprinted past her to get the food from the car.
She laughed a bit and rolled her eyes, as she proceeded to make her way into the sitting room.
Sirius was sitting on the couch, pale, as he was reading some paperwork. He was focused intently on the papers in front of him, causing Dora to pause. The last thing that she wanted to do was startle him.
"You really think that you can come in, have a conversation with Harry, and get all the way over here without me hearing you?" he asked, not taking his eyes off the paperwork. He flipped the page over and signed, rubbing a hand over his face.
"Depends how distracted you are. If that paper were a pretty girl, you never would have noticed me," she said, cheekily.
He rolled his eyes at the paper, eyes fluttering closed for a moment. A slight bob of his head and he opened his eyes. "If it were a girl, you wouldn't want to see the things we'd be doing."
"That's what your room's for," she replied.
"I'm in a room, and she would be too. You're just coming into it, and you know what they say – three's a crowd."
She stuck her tongue out of him, pulling a face as she did so. "Where's Remus?" she asked. "You may want to go check on Harry. There was a ton of food, and there's only so much gracefulness a teenage boy has."
"Kitchen," he said, getting up and stretching. "He's going to be mad at you – he didn't know you were bringing food, and he started to cook dinner."
"Oh no! Leftovers!" she cried, dramatically flinging her hand across her forehead. "Go help your nephew," she said, with a wink.
"Slave driver," he muttered, going to do as she asked.
When Dora stepped into the kitchen, Remus stood facing the workbench. Both hands grasped the edge, and his head was bowed slightly.
"Love?" she asked quietly, knowing better than to startle him.
He sniffed wetly and her heart nearly broke. "I'm sorry for picking up dinner. When Sirius called to say pick up pizzas, I figured you knew."
"Dora?" he rasped, his voice low and hoarse. There was a question in his rough voice. As though he hadn't expected her to be there, but wasn't bothered by her presence either.
Once acknowledged, she came up quickly behind him. "Are you well, love?" she asked.
He had slept well enough during the day – that was to say that he had actually slept. A tender hand cupped his cheek, and she noticed that his temperature was elevated.
"I'm fine," he answered, his voice almost normal. He turned back to the potatoes that he had been chopping on the bench. "HuhCHH!" he sneezed freely, spraying the potatoes in the process. He banged a frustrated fist on the bench and turned, wavering a bit, as he pulled his handkerchief out and tended to his nose.
"Bless you," she said, pulling out a piece of paper and pen from her purse. Quickly, she jotted the words 'Plague Potato' on them and put them on top of the potato. She would throw it away in a minute. For now, she had other things to worry about.
"Are you sure you're okay?" she asked, her voice more firm this time. She pulled gently on his shoulders in order to turn him around. "I mean, I don't think I've ever heard you sneeze – and certainly not without - ." Her statement was cut off as he sneezed again, this time covered and away from her. A groan emanated from him as the sneeze both caused him to feel more tired and his head to pound even harder.
"I'm fine," he said, roughly. He cleared his throat as he looked at her and bowed his head so that their foreheads were touching. He sniffed wetly again.
"Remus, you're sick, aren't you?" she asked, although it wasn't really a question.
He sighed. A nod. "I'm sorry, Dora. I'm not much company when I'm sick." He sounded defeated.
She pursed her lips together, her heart thudding in her chest. She had often wondered how he kept his constitution so strong with the other two always out and about. But, now he was sick and he had admitted it with very little prodding. That was a start – and one that she was pleased to take.
"That's okay. I'm glad I brought dinner then. You should eat a little now – you know keep your strength up."
"It's the flu, Dora, I'm not dying," he responded dryly. He cleared his throat again, this time giving in to strong coughs.
Dora couldn't help but bring her hands up to rest on his sides. Should he fall, she could only slow his way to the fall, but she prepped to brace against him. "Come, sit down before you fall down." She tried to guide him to one of the chairs.
"I don't need to be guided," he snapped, pulling away from her and brushing past her to sit down. His gait was more pronounced, but his legs were still strong. He walked out of the room without another word and sat down heavily on the couch.
"Of course you don't," she agreed following after him. She bit her bottom lip to keep from making a sarcastic remark. "I was just trying to help you, Remus." Fascinating to her was that his pride was wrapped up with falling ill. Normally, she would be joking and laughing with him. But, normally, he would be overly polite to her. It became apparent as concern caused anxiety to churn in her stomach, that this was not a normal situation.
She went to sit next to him, as a violent sneeze exploded out of him, caught tightly in his handkerchief. "Stay away, Dora," he snapped. He may have wanted to share his life with her, but this was just one of many situations that he intended to keep to himself.
"You'll have to try harder to make me go away," she said, sitting down close enough to him that he could reach out, or relax, if that was what he needed. However, she remained far enough away that they were not touching.
"Don't listen to the old grump," Sirius said, coming into the living room. "He's always a little more reclusive when he get sick. Doesn't want us to get sick – like that will keep us away."
"Reclusive?" she teased. "Remus? Surely you jest."
"I do not jest, and don't call my Shirley," Sirius responded, grinning at the old joke.
"Well," Remus croaked. "I never did get you two back for the glitter shower." A pause gave him time to give Sirius a half grin. "And that was just as I took sick last time."
Sirius smirked. "Well it wasn't as though we put the ailment in the glitter." He looked at Dora to explain. "He was being grumpy for a few days and Harry and I set up the shower curtain to sprinkle glitter on him every time he moved it."
Dora giggled a little, trying to image Remus covered in sparkles.
"Yea, yea," Remus said, dryly. "I was sneezing glitter for a week."
Dora got up, trying to smother her laughter. "I'll fix you a plate," she said starting to go back into the kitchen.
Sirius took a deep breath before speaking with Remus. He knew that in his right frame of mind, his friend would never hurt Dora. No more than he already had when they were getting together. Those days were done. But, he also knew that Remus' grasp on reality was tenuous at best when he was unwell. Sirius knew the feeling well – how easy it was to get lost in the fog of a fever and how balancing what had happened then with what was happening now. Depending on how high the fever got, the dreams could become hallucinations, and the lines between reality and fantasy could blur in the most dangerous of ways.
Sirius made certain that Dora was out of ear shot and speaking with Harry before engaging with Remus. "Don't push her away, Remus. But, let me know if your lines start blurring."
A nod. A wince as his head throbbed in protest. Remus sighed. He knew with every fiber of his being that Dora would want to care for him. With every yearning , he wanted to hold on to her and keep her held tightly, soaking up the comfort having her in his arms brought. But, there was the reality of the disease that kept him from giving in to the comfort that his body craved from the petite angel who thought him worthy. "Eh-CHA!" The sneeze erupted more like a cough, and was caught deftly in his handkerchief. "I know," he grunted, his voice gravely. "I don't want to fall her with this."
Sirius had held his breath, with a small head bob. After releasing his breath slowly he gave his friend a long, comforting look. "She's not going to care about the fact that you're sick. But, she's not going to expect the rest. I need you to keep me posted on your grasp of modern reality. Let me know if you're starting to slip."
Remus looked as though he was about to say something when Dora came back in. She sat next to Remus, but not too close. She turned to him, and went to hand him a mug of tea. But she paused, as he drew his handkerchief up to his face. Both hands clasped over the handkerchief, he rocked forward with a violent, "Heh-CHHA! HEH-Eh… huh…" she sneeze seemed to linger just barely at the edge of his expression. With a sudden shutting of his eyes, he let out a wet, "PESSHCHHA!" He blew his nose wetly, trying to breathe through several crunchy coughs.
"Blessings, my love," Dora said, gently, putting her hand on his leg.
He gave her a watery eyed smile and sniffed. "Thank you," he whispered. Truth be known, he didn't feel like smiling. Sirius words to him had been poignant. He knew how violent he could get when he was disoriented, and he didn't want her to be the victim of his hallucinations.
After about an hour, Remus began to yawn, and drift off despite himself.
Ever so quietly, Harry picked up the plates, and put a gentle hand on the man's arm. "Uncle Remus? Time for bed," he stated calmly.
Dora watched, making sure not to make any sudden moves that would startle the veteran who'd become accustomed to her being in the same position. Wary eyes flickered over to Sirius, who was watching Harry's every move, and was ready to react if Remus did. He knew that as long as there were no sudden movements, as long as all of the stimulus that Remus came in contact with was familiar.
Remus pulled awake with a stuttering breath. Harry kept his hand on him, as did Dora. Clearing his throat roughly, he made eye contact with Sirius. "'m sorry. I must have drifted off." He wished that he had remained asleep. His body felt heavy with fatigue and his throat and sinuses felt like they had been stuffed with cotton. Disoriented, he knew that he was safe. He knew that he was home, surrounded by his family. But, he was concerned… he knew he couldn't get himself from the couch to his bedroom without help.
"KerSSSHHHH!" The sneeze was heavy and upon him before he knew it. Bleary eyed, he sneezed freely, trying to curl into himself and keep the spray from both Harry and Dora. The blessings around the room were difficult for him to hold on to and he grunted with a congested, "Ugh."
"Come on," Sirius said, coming up to Remus and lending him an arm. "Up you get, old man. I'll get you into bed, while Dora and Harry clean up."
Remus held Sirius gaze, and gave him a dutiful nod. He was so grateful that Sirius just seemed to understand when he needed more support than Dora could offer.
As they walked away, Remus leaned most of his weight onto his friend. "Sirius, how long?" he asked, as quietly as his altered state would allow.
"Don't worry about it, Remus. You just wait for my hot little cousin to tuck you in." He kept Remus tight against him, feeling the heat of the other man's fever radiating off of him in thick waves. It was like they were back in the sandbox again. Too hot and tired… to disoriented to have a clear big picture. Sirius knew that his own nightmares would be tough to get through.
"I don't want Dora sleeping with me tonight," Remus proclaimed as they crossed the threshold to his bedroom.
Sirius lowered him down slowly. "I can tell her that. That the dreams will be too much for you to control, too much for her to bear. But, you know she's going to want to be at your side." He thought about New Year's Eve, and how Dora had handled the whole situation with grace and decorum.
Remus looked as though he was going to answer when he was overtaken by a fit of husky coughs. His back ached and his ribs cramped. He wanted nothing more than to hold Dora close. As the fit finally subsided, he looked at Sirius. "I don't want her to catch this either. What if she is ill and I cannot care for her?"
"I won't leave," a soft voice said from the doorway, causing Sirius to whirl around, quite ready to attack the intruder before he realized who it was.
"I never knew you could be so quiet kid," he said, as he tried to calm his breathing.
"Sometimes," Dora said, coming into the room. "If you don't want me in bed with you – don't want me to be near you, I'll stay in a chair nearby. I won't leave you like this. Just like I won't let Sirius completely ignore his cold or whatever he's been trying to smother all day." She looked her cousin over. "You look like hell, and you don't think I wouldn't catch the stifled sneezes? Really?"
"You'll keep, kid," Sirius said, pulling her close in a hug and whispering, "Don't you dare let him out of your sight tonight."
"Remus, I'll be right back," she said, following Sirius out of the room. "First," she placed her hand on his cheek." Low fever.
"It's early. I'll take a bunch of zinc and be right as rain. Now, go on," he said, gently, watching as his cousin closed the door behind her.
Sweat dripped down Remus face as he felt the fire of the blowtorch consume him. He screamed and arched his back to get away from the flames, but they pushed a board on top of him, pressing him against the sand – hot flames scorching him, sand scraping into his wounds, as his breath was pushed out of him. In a panic, he gasped for breath and let out a scream.
Dora had kept her word, and slept in a chair by Remus' bed. A conversation with Sirius made it clear that Remus did not like to be coddled, and could not be controlled, nor expected to be in control, when his fever climbed over a certain degree. Waiting until he had fallen to sleep, she sat at his bedside sponging his face and chest, willing the fever to come back down.
She awoke with a start when he started to gasp for breath. Something was wrong, and she leaned forward to press a gentle palm on his chest. "Remus, love. Wake up." His skin was burning to the touch, and she swore.
He did not. Rather, he started to thrash and scream, obviously trying to get away from those who held him captive.
"Oh God, okay," she said, moving to sit next to him on the bed. "Remus, wake up!" she demanded firmly. "Remus!" She shook pressed down on his shoulder.
"No…" he cried, in his sleep. His adams apple bobbed as he arched backwards, squeezing his eyes shut, causing a mix of tears and sweat to mingle causing his face to glisten in the pale moonlight that trickled in through his bedroom window.
"Dora!" he screamed, waking up, immediately panicked when he realized that she wasn't beside him." He sat up. "No! Dora!" He knew that she had abandoned him. His head thudded in his ears, and he coughed through the thickness of the tears and shouts.
Catching him by the shoulders, she rested her head on his shoulder, as she shushed him. "Rest now, love. I'm here," she soothed. "You're safe in England. I'm safe with you."
Seconds later, a frantic Sirius appeared at the door. "Rem!" he said, out of breath, half dressed and walking in slowly.
He looked like he was going to say something to her, when Remus suddenly Remus made a gagging sound. A deep inhale and then his cried out in pain as his knees pulled reflexively to his chest. "HehTECCHHH!" he sneezed freely, snorting against the building congestion.
Dora caught him by the shoulders and pushed his pillows up so that he could lean against them in a sitting position. "It's okay love."
Obviously still disoriented, he looked at her – or more specifically past her, as though she wasn't there. She happened to notice his focus slide in and out, and another deep breath. She turned, to try to shield her face from the spray, when a handful of tissues appeared pressed against Remus' nose and mouth. And not a moment too soon. "AFRECCHHH!" Remus sneezed harshly, into the tissues. Carefully, he took the tissues and looked at a slightly disgusted Sirius. "Thangs," he said, stuffily. "Sorry, 'bout that."
"Don't think on it," Sirius said. He watched as Dora scooted Remus into her spot, careful of his bad leg. As she bathed his face and neck with the water, he saw his friend begin to shiver.
"Care to talk about it?" he asked, although with a fever that high, he could guess which memory was haunting his friend.
"Fire… they were holding me down… burning me…" he explained.
"The fever doesn't help," Dora said, continuing her ministrations. "But, I'm here love."
He moved closer to her, tugging her so that she was resting next to him.
Sirius smiled, and tucked them in. "Rest, Dora," he said, as he watched his friend place his head on Dora's chest and hold her close. He watched with a small smile as she rubbed a damp tea cloth up and down Remus' back and dropped a kiss on his head. Quietly, he left the room, flicking off the light before going to bed.
The next day, Remus felt as though every bit of coddling that he had ever given to Dora, Harry, and Sirius was being revisited on him ten-fold. Difficult though it was for him to keep his temper, he knew that his family was doing so with his best interests at heart. Sitting on the couch, with Dora next to him, he shivered beneath the blanket, trying his best not to annoy anyone. "Heh-eh-KESSTCHHH!" he sneezed, pitching forward. Having caught it in a handful of tissues, he gave his nose a congested honk and coughed against the congestion.
"Bless you, love," Dora said softly, almost absently. She hated that he was feeling so poorly, and wanted to make certain that she rode the fine line between caring and smothering. She knew that he had been through worse than the flu, but that didn't mean that she wanted him to suffer through it alone.
"Th-thanks," he replied before pitching forward in another wet sneeze. He felt her hand on his back, and leaned into the touch. Her love was so easy to soak up, and he couldn't help but want to do so as freely as she gave it.
"My love… what can I do to make you feel better?" she offered, hoping he would mention what hurt him the most, so that she could get the right over the counter medicine for him.
"Tea, toast and aspirin," Sirius said coming in with a tray. He placed it on the table, and was not surprised when Remus blanched in response. "At least drink the tea and take the aspirin," he coached.
Remus nodded, and leaned forward to pick up the cup, his hand shaking as he brought the hot liquid to his lips. Honey, lemon. He sniffed as the steam started to break up the congestion. "So you have been paying attention all these years," he teased, taking another sip and working hard not to sniffle.
"Only sometimes," Sirius responded. "Blow your nose, Remus. Otherwise…"
His warning was too late as Remus doubled over helplessly in a sneeze, causing the tea to spill out of the cup. Dora had been trying to pluck the cup out of his hands, and the tea spilled over her hand instead.
She gasped and pulled her hand back, giving Remus a small blessing and pushing the pain back with a long blink.
"Dora?" Remus asked, confused – his voice gravely fatigued.
Sirius swore, and pulled Dora up by her arm. "Come on. Get to the sink." Making eye contact with Remus he stated, "Don't worry about it. She'll be fine."
Leading her into the kitchen, he put her hand under the cool running water. Just focus on my voice, he said, his smooth tenor starting to speak about ideas for the next holiday – some of them ridiculous, others making plain sense. Slowly, the pain subsided, and he reached into the cupboard for the burn salve. "Here you go," he said, putting it on her reddened hand. "You'll be good as new in no time."
She threw her arms around his neck, both for her affection and to make certain he wasn't running a higher fever. "Thank you, Sirius," she whispered.
"Look, I know you're tired, but if you start getting maudlin, I'll assume you're sick too, and send you both to bed."
She laughed a bit, and went back into the living room. Turning to Remus as she sat down, her heart melted at the pained, frantic expression in his eyes. "Are you alright?" Observant eyes bounced over her face and down her body trying to figure out what had happened exactly. He had noticed that the couch was wet with warm liquid and was worried that his worst fears had come through and he had hurt her on accident.
Drawing her legs up under her, she pulled him close and rested her head on his chest. She smiled as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. Thin lips pulled into a frown when she felt his stomach tremble against her and his heart racing against her ear. He whimpered and pulled her tighter to him when she tried to pull away to look up at him.
"Hush now," she whispered so softly that if Harry or Sirius happened by they wouldn't hear her. She tilted her head up ever so slightly so that she could look at him, and smiled when he closed his eyes and hunched down to rest his forehead against hers allowing her to feel the beads of sweat that he had likely been dabbing off his forehead all day.
He took a slow deep breath, shaking as he exhaled.
"It's nothing Remus. Sirius stitched me up – good as new," she said, gently.
He shook his head, not letting go, not ready to talk.
"Remus, love," she said, her tone firm but voice still quiet, "you're safe. You're home, here in England. My darling… you're all right. I have you. I'm not hurt. You didn't hurt me. Sirius and Harry are here and they love you more than anything."
"'cept each other," he teased himself. His voice wasn't playful, but at least he was drawing out slightly.
"Well they can have each other, because that leaves you for me," she told him, pressing a kiss to his lips. His lips molded to hers, but there wasn't much of a returned kiss.
"Come," she said, pulling him oh so gently. "We'll take a nap for a bit."
He let out a strangled cry, and pulled her tightly to him again.
"Remus, I'm right here," she said, holding him tightly. "I'm not going to let you go… not until you're ready. What is it my love?"
"I just need to feel you right now, my sweet Heh-ETCCHHH! Dora," he said. He had angled the sneeze away from her, and sniffled, coughing as the congestion irritated his already sore throat.
"Bless you, dear," she said, smiling a bit, as she rested her head against his chest. She had recalled when the two of them had caught cold when they were first dating. His sneezes had always intrigued her. Most people had to build up into them and then recover. Remus incorporated them into whatever he was doing, or saying, and then continued on as though nothing had happened. Sirius had explained that it was because of their field training – high stress, low sleep and food situations caused ailments to have to be worked through. There was never a safe enough situation in which they could nurse their ailments like a civilian, so they learned to do without.
"Thank you," he sighed, a slight tinge of congestion lingering on the edges of his words.
"Remus, we are going to go to bed now," she ordered in her best matronly voice. It wasn't very good yet, and she hated taking the control away from her boyfriend, her hero.
Remus simply nodded and followed her to his bedroom, his limp more pronounced than usual. She let him lay down on his side of the bed. He hadn't been able to get comfortable on hers the night before, and it was apparent to her that he needed to rest in a position that he found comfortable. After he gave a small sniffle, she held her breath. Although any sneezing would now be angled away from her, she hated the amount of discomfort the whole process obviously left him in. Bringing his hand to his face, he released a strangled "Heh-GESTCHTA! HRETCHH!"
She entwined her fingers with his. "Bless," she whispered. She hadn't heard him sneeze twice in a row yet, and she could only imagine that it was due to his growing exhaustion.
A strangled cough eeked its ways out of him, and he removed his hands to cough heavily into them. She looked up at him, pulling a frown as a flush rose to his cheeks. "I'm going to go make you some tea," she said, putting her hand on his good leg as she stood up. "You just rest and let me take care of you."
Generally, he would have a witty retort. But, as it was he could barely think straight. He knew he wanted her in his arms, and that he felt warmer, more loved, and more secure with her in his arms. He wouldn't be able protect her if the home was suddenly invaded. Logically, he knew that the likelihood of that happening was very very low, and that he had not chosen a delicate princess who could not fend for herself. He had not married someone like Jessica thankfully. But, he still felt the need to protect her, to know he could if he had to. "Hurtchhhh!" he sneezed, covering the spray in his hand. With a quiet guh, he leaned back. He would have to rely on her to care for him… he knew he could rely on her to care for him. Within moments, he was fast asleep.
Dora smiled as she watched Remus sleep. It was the only time that he was truly at peace, and even that was recent. "Remus love," she said softly, touching him on the shoulder.
Amber eyes flashed open and he flinched away from her instinctually.
"No, no," she said, gently, sitting down next to him. "It's okay. You're in England love."
"Dora?" he asked, as though he was having difficulty placing where he was. "Hurtchhhhhssshh!" Powerful and wet, the sneeze doubled him over, and was barely caught in his hands, and gave way to chesty coughs.
"Shhh," she soothed, rubbing gentle circles on his back.
"Uh, Dora," he sighed with a slight whine. "I don't feel well," he admitted.
She wasn't surprised that he wasn't feeling well, but her stomach churned at his admittance of it. "I know, love," she whispered. "I can get you a potion for it. Maybe something to help suppress the symptoms so you can sleep?"
Before she had even finished he was shaking his head. "No… I don't like feeling different… even when I feel like," he barked out a cough, bringing his hands to his mouth. He sniffled, and winced at the pain that spiked through his head.
"Tea?" she asked, hoping he would drink some. She already planned to give it to him slightly cool. Anything to bring down the fever.
Coughing into a fist, he swallowed thickly. "A bit," he acquiesced weakly, but he dropped off to sleep too quickly, and Dora didn't want to wake him again.
Dora had slept lightly with Remus for a few hours, but was quite tired of being in bed. After gently telling him exactly where she was going, she pressed a kiss to his forehead, and went into the kitchen.
Harry and Sirius were at the kitchen table talking quietly. "How's he feeling?" Harry asked.
"Sick," she replied honestly. "He knows where I am, but I'm not going to work today."
"Already called you out," Sirius said, handing her over a mug of strong coffee. "Told Moody what was going on. You've got three days before you need a note, apparently, and he said to take them."
She nodded and sipped the coffee. The caffeine coursing through her body felt like Heaven. "Thank you," she said to Sirius with a half of a grin.
"You all right, Dora?" Harry asked, being far too observant for a boy his age. She supposed it came from growing up with Sirius and Remus. The boy had no choice but to be observant.
She sighed, and shook herself back to the present. She didn't even realize that she was doing the thousand yard stare. "I've just never seen him ill. It's not fair. He copes so well all the time, and now he has to cope with this too." She fretted about when it would be too much for him. When was he going to snap? While she trusted herself, him, and Sirius enough to keep her safe, the fact was everyone had a breaking point, and Remus rode his pretty hard on a normal basis.
Sirius nodded. "He doesn't get violent, Dora. He's too weak. Honestly, you could probably take him at this point. But, he knows that so it's hard for him to rest… he's too vulnerable."
"Would he feel better in your room?" she asked Sirius. "Or if you were in his room?" She didn't care if she was the person Remus felt safest around. All she cared about was that he felt safe.
Sirius shook his head. "He knows he's safe here. And, as soon as he can, he'll be up and trying to act normal. Just let him."
"And be there if he topples," Harry stated quietly.
Dora's eyes went wide. "How often does that happen? I couldn't catch him if I tried."
Sirius shook his head. "Nah, just crowd against him. Make sure he knows someone is there. He usually can catch himself." He recalled the few times Remus had fallen and how much it had scared Sirius. Mostly, Remus only hurt his own pride. But, there was no need to talk about that. Dora would see to it that Remus stayed put.
She nodded. "I don't know how high his fever is. And he won't take medicine."
Sirius shrugged. "It doesn't really matter how high it is. We know it's high. And, I'm not surprised he won't take medicine. If after all these years he won't take a sleep aid, I wouldn't expect him to take much of anything. He likes to be under his own power. No matter how little power he currently has."
She nodded. "And how are you feeling?" she asked her cousin.
"Eh, it's a cold Dora. It's okay." He looked at the clock. "Come on Harry – I'll drop you off at school on my way to work." When Harry left the room, Sirius hung back for a minute. "Call me for anything, okay?"
Dora spent the morning sponging down Remus' face and chest, to try to bring down the fever that ravaged through him. She felt the air around them becoming thick, and bit her bottom lip as she silently prayed to whatever deity might be listening not to let it storm. She knew that the barometric pressure would only aggravate his injuries more, and the poor man needed to rest.
He grunted in his sleep and reached for his hip.
"Shhh," she soothed. But, it was for naught as a flash of lightening lit the room and the crash of thunder was right after it. She withdrew her hands just in time for him to let out a scream and curl towards where she would have been had she been lying next to him.
Disoriented and stuck somewhere between the present and his horrific past, his eyes shot open. "Dora!" he screamed, panicked.
She climbed partway onto the bed. "Remus, love."
Before she could continue, he took a swing at her, his arms swooping upwards. Prepared for it, she leaned back and caught his arms, as though he were a suspect to be brought down. "Come on Remus. It's okay. Come back to me," she said, trying to keep track of where his arms and elbows were. She knew that he couldn't twist too much more because of his hip and knee injuries. Using that knowledge, she grabbed his wrists and moved so her forearms were braced against his. "Remus! Remus! You're in England, love."
A confused look crossed his face, and he face screwed up in an impending sneeze. Wrenching his arms away from her, he turned away to sneeze harshly into his hands. "Heh-eh-EKSCHA! Heh-CHAA!" He groaned as a wave of dizziness swept over him, and his pitched forward.
Seeing him lose his balance, Dora reached out and braced him by his shoulders. "I have you, love. It's okay. It's just a storm." Her arms strained under his weight as she tried to lay him down gently from her awkward angle.
"Dora?" he breathed.
"Yes, love. It's okay. I'm right here."
Settling onto his back, he reached out for her hand, entwining her fingers in his own. He brought her hand up to his lips and kissed them. "I didn't know if they had gotten you, too," he whispered, still teetering between the present and the past.
She used her other hand to pick up the washcloth and dip it back into the bowl of water. Her heart felt as though it was beating out of her chest. It was the closest that he had ever come to actually hurting her. She recalled how they had gotten through New Years… he needed to know that he was safe – that he was in England. He needed a distraction.
Another flash of light burst through the curtains and the crack of thunder sounded as though the sky itself was coming down.
He screamed again, terrified, as though he wasn't quite out of his nightmare, and had begun to careen into another one.
Crawling into her spot next to him, she gathered him into her arms. "It's okay, love. I've got you." She held him tightly, and dropped a kiss onto his head. "I have you my love. You're safe. You're in England."
She jumped as she heard the front door bang open. She felt him tense in her arms. "It's okay. I'll bet you it's just Sirius."
As predicted, Sirius rushed to the door and then entered the room quietly. "Rem?"
Remus picked his head up, pulling away from Dora. A harsh cough ripped from his chest. "Sirius…" he gasped, obviously distraught. "Sirius…"
Sirius, rushed up to the bed and sat on the edge. "You're all right old man," he said. "You're in England. Dora's here. I'm here. It's just lightening, Remus."
"They tried to take Dora," Remus said with a strangled gasp.
"Who?" Sirius asked, grasping his friends' shoulder tightly. There was alarm in his expression when he looked at Dora.
"He was having a nightmare, and was woken up by the flash of lightening and the crash of thunder. When he went to protect me, I wasn't where he expected me to be." At her cousin's glare, she continued, "I was right here. But, it didn't seem to matter."
Sirius' features softened and he nodded. Turning back to Remus, he continued. "Nobody took Dora. She's right here. We're both here. It's okay Rem."
Another flash of light.
"Dammit!" Sirius swore, diving at the window to pull the curtains closed tight.
Dora took the moment to straddle Remus, and pull him close, feeling his cheek press against her chest. "I've got ya." She felt him shudder beneath her as a violent sneeze detonated to the side.
The thunder finally clapped, and the two of them jumped.
"Talk to him, Dora. Anything," Sirius said, coaching her through this. It was the worst that he'd seen Remus in a while. But, with his friend's disoriented state due to illness, he knew that Remus would have a hard time of it. He had tried to make it home before the storm. "I'm going to make him tea, and I'll be back."
"Remus, love, I know you're feel ill. It won't last forever. I'm sorry for scaring you this morning. I've just been caring for you from the other side of the bed. I'd never truly leave you. Not really. It'll be okay. You're okay. You're safe. You're loved. Sirius is home, and will keep us both safe. I won't let you go. You're safe here. You're in England. In your room. With your girlfriend on your lap, and your best mate in the kitchen. Harry is at school."
It was as though 'Harry' was the magic word. Suddenly, he looked at her, his eyes locked on her. "Oh God, where is he?" he asked, clearly. He had finally come to the present reality.
Dora placed a gentle hand on his cheek, which he leaned into, taking in the coolness of her skin. "It's all right, love. He's at school. You're safe with me, and Sirius is home."
He nodded and winced, trying to reposition his hip.
She slowly moved to take position in her normal spot on the bed. "I love you," she stated.
"I'm lucky," he whispered quietly. Suddenly, his face relaxed and he bit his bottom lip. "Not… not again," he nearly whined. "Heh… ehh… ehh… Ek-ETCH! ESHHH!" He sniffled wetly, setting himself off on a long coughing spell. He grasped at his ribs and winced.
"Bless you," she said.
"Nuh… not yet. " Snatching up the handkerchief off the bedside table, he sneezed again, "Heh-ETCCHHH!" He gasped for breath afterwards and gave his nose a short honk. "Ugh."
"Hey sneezy… the Disney character has nothing on you," Sirius said, coming in with a tray of tea.
Remus was about to place the handkerchief next to him when he snatched it up again. "Huh-CHA! Ugh, you guys shouldn't be around me. You're gonna catch this."
Both Dora and Sirius pretended not to hear him, as they passed tea and fixings back and forth until each other had the tea just the way they liked it.
"Don't be a prat. Drink your tea," Sirius directed.
The next day, Harry had plans with the Weasley's. But, getting him out of the house was proving to be a harder trick than anticipated.
"Harry, I assure you, I won't be of pleasant company," Remus said, as clearly as he could. He was painfully aware of how congested his voice had become.
"But, you and Uncle Sirius don't leave me when I don't feel well…" Harry argued softly.
"Cub, I don't have the strength to argue with you," Remus said, clearing his throat with a wince.
Dora had been watching the argument transpire. Unlike most teenagers, Harry was a good kid and she knew he would never willfully hurt Remus. Instead, she was touched at the concern that Harry was displaying. And, despite his retorts, she knew that Remus was too. "Might as well let him stay, love," she replied, gently. Normally, she would jump in on Remus' side. But, he and Sirius had raised Harry well, and she knew the boy would only worry about Remus if he was sent away.
Remus coughed harshly into a fist. "Fine, seeing as I'm out-numbered," he acquiesced with a sigh. "But, Harry, don't get too close. I don't want you to get sick."
Harry gave him a look that said he was not amused. "I'll care for you gently. Don't you worry."
Remus thought it was an odd statement, but before he could ask for clarification… "Hetcchhhaa! Heesshhoo! Etccchhh!" The sneezes lacked the veracity of those from the day before, but were wetter. He had caught them in a handkerchief, hastily picked up when he felt them coming on. He finished the fit with a few dry coughs.
Sighing he bent his head forward and closed his eyes.
Dora and Harry shared a worried glance.
"Uncle Remus?" Harry asked quietly.
A sneeze that sounded like it came from the depth of Remus' soul exploded out of him. Huge and wet, it snapped his head forward so quickly that he was unable to catch the spray. He choked for a moment before covering his mouth as several harsh coughs worked their way out.
Dora put her hand on his back, thinking that she would rub soft circles on his back. But, instead, he leaned towards her. She scooched to the end of the couch and let him lay his head in her lap, as he shifted himself on the couch.
Giving him an alarmed look, she rubbed up and down his arm, realizing a moment too late that he was shivering. "Shhh. It's okay love," she soothed.
Harry came over and placed a blanket over his uncle.
"Harry?" Remus asked. He opened his eyes slightly. He felt sick, although slightly less-so than the day before. Dizziness obscured his vision and made breathing difficult. Lying down was his only option. Fearful of an invasion, he knew that Dora could keep the family safe – could keep him safe.
Harry knelt down on the other side of the coffee table. "Present," he said, with a little bit of cheek.
"Forgive me," Remus said. "I'm sorry that you have to see me like this… again." He never was strong enough for Harry. The boy had to deal with his recovery during Harry's young life, and had made allowances for Remus' foibles over the course of his lifetime. Remus did not often get sick, but when he did it laid him out completely.
"There's nothing to forgive," Harry stated. "You're sick. It happens. But, we're here, and you're safe, and we're going to take care of you. "
Remus was vaguely aware that he should say something, but by the time his time to talk had come, he had fallen asleep.
