Disclaimer: I do not own- the copyrights to The Legend of Zelda series, cuccos [or chickens], or any bombs or deku nuts. Also no chickens [or cuccos] were harmed in the conception and writing of this fic.
Author's Note: As stated above, I didn't harm anything/anyone by writing this fic, so please don't PETA to my door. ^.^* As I've stated before, I consider Sheik a male and separate identity from Zelda, so don't send me flames saying that "Sheik = Zelda, so Sheik = Female" or anything similar. This isn't a fluff fic, there's not SheikxLink slash/yaoi/whatever, even if you squint. Therefore, just read the oneshot for what it is and have a few good laughs. I wrote this in part of excitement about Skyward Sword, since I found out you can bowl with bombs. Anyways please read/enjoy/review. ~Anime Stars (aka: Chibi)
PS: Hopefully this will not have line spacing issues, my apologies if it does. It does have line spacing issues, I'm sorry. T.T
.
.
Wild Cucco…Bowling?
.
Hyrule field was relatively quiet even for a sunny afternoon. There were only two figures walking together, one totally relaxed while the other fidgeted nervously. The Hero of Time shook his head again and looked side long at Sheik.
"Sheik, you are totally insane." Link commented as the Sheikah walked leisurely beside him.
"Hero, you've said that quite a few times since we've left Hyrule Castle. Both you and Princess Zelda continue to call me that. May I ask why?" He replied, adjusting the cowl that covered the bottom half of his face.
"It's because this idea of yours is a bit…" Link trailed off and shrugged. He didn't know how to explain it without insulting Sheik.
"I don't see why it's an issue. We'll have to eat later anyways, so I thought it would be a perfect idea to try it out."
"Try it out?" Link was worried and almost wanted to knock some sense into Sheik, except he knew the smaller man would have an advantage in hand-to-hand combat. "As in you've never played it before?"
"Correct. The princess and other guards politely declined playing with me. It was Zelda who suggested asking you about it. I'm very glad you agreed." Sheik said, smoothly turning to walk backwards.
Link brought one gauntleted hand to pinch the bridge of his nose. He honestly had no idea how the Sheikah managed to come up with the oddest ideas. First there was the target practice he had somehow been talked into setting up. How was he supposed to know that the exact day he and Sheik were going to use it that Zelda would be having lunch with visiting dignitaries in the garden? It had taken him awhile to get back into the Princess's graces after he had picked up every piece of broken pottery.
Then there was the relay race in the Gerudo Desert. He had only agreed to participate in that because he was thinking about using the Horseback Archery Range with Epona. It took two weeks to get rid of all the sand from his equipment and bags, and that was after accepting that he had lost because he had forgotten the Lens of Truth to follow the Spirit Guide.
He almost shuddered when he thought about the diving contest in Zora's Domain. The reason Link had won that contest because he was being chased by Ruto, again. Sheik and Zelda had teased him about that afterwards for a week. Then there was the Goron Incident…which had involved a bomb bag and an avalanche. Link had thanked the Goddesses that he had the Gold Gauntlets and the Megaton Hammer so he could fix that mess before Zelda had arrived. Now Sheik had concocted a new idea, and the poor hero had been summoned to help him out, though Zelda had mentioned that Link was supposed to talk Sheik out of the idea. When the princess had told him exactly what Sheik had planned, Link had understood right away why she was worried.
"Are you sure you want to play this?" He asked, hoping that Sheik was going to back out at the last moment.
"Wild Cucco Bowling? Why yes, of course I want to play." Red eyes narrowed. "Are you going to back out now? We're almost there."
Link's blue eyes locked with Sheik's. "No, I'm not backing out. What exactly are the rules to this game?"
"Ah yes. To start you need at least ten wild cuccos. The wild cuccos that run about in Hyrule Field are the best choice, as you don't have to be worried about being called a thief if you try to take them from elsewhere."
Link chuckled. "Speaking from experience?"
Sheik busied himself by fixing the bandages on his hands. "Perhaps. Now where was I? Oh yes, the cuccos. Once you have them gathered you either put them in a makeshift pen or in a grotto.
I can just see where this is going. No wonder Sheik asked me to leave Epona at the castle. The poor girl doesn't like cuccos that much. The Hero of Time thought as Sheik turned to walk forwards and continue explaining the rules.
"Now here is where you're able to choose the rules to match what you prefer. You take three deku nuts, bombs, or bombchus a round and throw them at the cuccos. The object is to knock out all ten of your cuccos. That's why I suggest having more than ten cuccos, since you never know what will happen."
Link sighed, now he truly didn't like where this was going. "So how many cuccos did you gather, and what are we using to play with?"
"Unless you have your bombs or bombchus on you we'll be using deku nuts." Sheik sounded hopeful that Link had brought either version of the bombs.
"I left my all my bomb bags on Epona, so we'll have to play with deku nuts. So the winner is the one who knocks out all ten of their cuccos in the fewest rounds, and with the fewest deku nuts?"
Sheik nodded. "Exactly."
"That seems to easy for you, Sheik. What's the catch?"
Sheik stopped walking and turned to face the hero. "I don't understand. Why do you think I'm tricking you?"
"Because every time you and I go through with one or your ideas it usually means I get in some sort of trouble. Not to mention I don't think you were able to find at least ten wild cuccos."
"Here. We'll have to see then. I put them in there." Sheik tossed a small pouch at Link and pointed at a hole in the ground.
Link caught the pouch, shaking his head. "I've gone first all the other times. Please, go ahead."
The Sheikah shrugged and pulled out three deku nuts out of another pouch on his belt. He dropped down into the hole without a sound. Link waited a beat and then walked forward, stopping only when he saw three bright flashes go off in rapid succession. There was another beat of silence, which was pierced by an extremely loud cucco shriek. Link gulped and tokk a step back, he knew exactly what that sound meant.
Suddenly Sheik clambered out of the hole, his red eyes panicked. "Run, Hero." He managed to say before a storm of cuccos flew out of the hole and started squawking.
Link took off after Sheik. "I told you this was a bad idea!"
"Are you speaking from experience now?" Sheik called back to him.
"Yeah. I accidently hit a cucco a couple of time in Kakariko Village once. I kinda figured wild cuccos would be a lot worse to run from."
"How long will they chase us for?"
"A while."
"Well, Hero, I see indeed that this was indeed a bad idea so I need to go rethink the rules." Sheik suddenly stopped, pulling out a deku nut. With a flash of light he was gone, with the cuccos still chasing after Link.
"Sheik!" The Hero of Time called out as he dodged yet another cucco attack.
.
.
.
Two Hours Later, In Hyrule Castle
.
"Ouch." Sheik winced as Zelda calmly cleaned a cut he had received earlier from the cuccos.
"Hold still, and it doesn't hurt that much. If you had just listened to Link and myself you wouldn't have been attacked. In short, it's your own fault that you got hurt and are covered in feathers." The Princess said, plucking yet another feather out of Sheik's hair.
"Well, next time it would be nice for you both to actually say the idea is bad. It would be much easier than dancing around the subject like you usually do." Sheik replied, rising from where he had sat on the floor.
He had only taken a few steps when Zelda spoke again. "Where's Link?"
Sheik froze, not turning around. "The Hero should be fine."
"That's not what I asked, Sheik. I asked where Link is."
The Sheikah didn't have to turn around to know that the princess was smiling at him, and not in a good way. "We…separated…to try and get away from the cuccos." He supplied after a moment to carefully choose his words.
"You separated…is that your way of saying you left him to clean up your mess again?"
Sheik adjusted his cowl, his back still facing the irate woman behind him. "Perhaps."
Zelda sighed, trying to will away a headache that had formed ever since Sheik had reappeared in the castle covered in cucco feathers. "Sheik, you really are insane…you do know that right?"
He smiled behind his cowl and walked out of the room. "Why of course, I only do this to see how far I can push Link out of his mind. It's rather fun watching him run around." He spoke to himself, and hummed the Nocturne of Shadows under his breath as he retired to his room for the evening.
.
.
As for Link, The Hero of Time
.
" I swear to the Goddesses when I get out of this mess I'm going to make Sheik pay for this." Link murmured under his breath as he tried, and failed to catch another cucco.
"Usually I would give you something good for catching all my cuccos and returning them to me since I'm allergic to them. This time however, since you stole them, you won't get a reward." The Cucco Lady said, standing with her hands on her hips as she monitored Link's slow progress in returning all the stolen cuccos to her.
"I knew Sheik couldn't find ten wild cuccos." He mutter darkly and then finally caught a cucco. "Only eight more to go!"
