Trust
Chapter One
She was nervous as she walked into what she had been told was the Great Hall for the first time. She looked up at the ceiling and vaguely recalled something she had read about in Hogwarts, A History. In an effort to appear as informed as everyone else, she chattered about books and bewitching. But as she approached the front of the room with the others, her nerves steadily increased. She had had a few months to get used to the idea of magic and it still took her breath away. What scared her most was the Sorting about to take place. She knew that it would determine a great deal about her life here in Hogwarts, maybe even after.
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Hermione remembered when Professor McGonagall showed up at her doorstep all those months ago. Her father had opened the door to reveal an old woman with dark hair and a stern face. She was wearing a curious sort of cloak that made her look like she had stepped out of another era. After politely asking to speak to the parents of one Hermione Granger, she stepped into their home. The woman looked entirely out of place inside their warm and cluttered house. When she heard her name mentioned, Hermione introduced herself to the lady. Then the woman said, "I am Professor McGonagall," with a soft smile that made Hermione realize the woman was not nearly as mean as she looked, "and I am a witch. I have much to tell you today, Miss Granger."
After that she explained quite a bit about the wizarding world. In turn, that conversation explained quite a bit of Hermione's world. "Miss Granger, have you ever done something that you couldn't explain? Perhaps when you were excited or upset?" the strange Scottish woman had asked her.
Hermione nodded slowly. McGonagall continued, "Do you feel different than the children your age, as if you don't belong?" Hermione nodded again, "It's because of the magic inside of you. You are different. You are part of a world that has been kept secret from you."
Usually Hermione would have required more of an explanation than that. She liked reasoning and logic. Her parents had taught her to think things through carefully before coming to a decision or adjusting her beliefs. But the very second she heard the word "magic" she was convinced. She knew in her bones that what the woman – witch – had told her was true. Every odd occurrence in her life before that point now made sense. And the mysterious longing she had always felt now had a reason. It was the happiest day in her life. So far, at least.
Dr. and Dr. Granger took just a bit more convincing. They had known that Hermione was an odd child. One time, when they had been arguing, quietly, so she wouldn't hear, they had looked up to find their six year old daughter in tears and then found that they could no longer speak. They had been terrified for minutes until she finally stopped crying and found their words returned to them. Another time, when Jean Granger had shut the light off for bed time to discourage Hermione from reading, she returned to find a strange blue light illuminating the girl's bedroom.
They were eager to accept any explanation. "Hogwarts is a school for young witches and wizards that teaches the fundamental skills that all magical people need to learn to succeed in life. It is a very prestigious school with one of the best curriculums in the world."
"Where is this school at, and why haven't we heard of it?" John Granger asked, just a bit impatiently, as if he thought anything he wasn't aware of didn't exist.
"I am afraid I can't tell you that, since you are a muggle and it would violate many of our laws to tell you," the witch replied, "Unfortunately most parents of muggleborns aren't able to be informed of some of the specifics in their children's lives. I assure you, however, that Hogwarts is the best there is, and you will be able to communicate with your daughter via letter whenever you would like."
"If we don't know where the school is how are we supposed to take her there?" John asked exasperatedly, "And what are muggles?"
"Muggles are people who aren't magical. And you won't have to take Miss Granger there. There is a train that all of the students take to and from the school," McGonagall replied, with a touch of impatience herself. She understood wanting to know more, but their attitude was uncalled for.
"So it is a boarding school?" Jane asked.
"Yes," McGonagall replied, and the Doctors Granger looked strangely relieved, "and don't worry about tuition, Hogwarts is entirely supported by donations from successful graduates. You will only need to provide Miss Granger with school supplies and basic essentials. And if you are unable to afford it, there are scholarships available," she said, clearly proud to offer the best education at no cost.
Hermione's curiosity had reached a peak by this point and she began to almost tremble with unasked questions. Before she could figure out the proper way to interrupt the adult's conversation, Professor McGonagall noticed her behavior and smiled again.
"You must have many questions, Miss Granger, and I will leave a book here with you that will hopefully answer some of them. For now, let me properly introduce myself. I am Minerva McGonagall, transfiguration professor, deputy Headmistress, and the Head of Gryffindor House," she said, and Hermione was relieved to have been included in the discussion.
"What is Gryffindor House, ma'am?" she had inquired, with a look of eagerness on her face. She wanted to know everything about this strange new world that had been opened to her.
"Gryffindor is one of four Houses at Hogwarts, Miss Granger. The others are Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Every student is sorted into one of these for Houses when they first enter school, and remain in that house for the duration of their academic career. Houses attend classes, form teams, are punished, and are rewarded together. Your House is like your family," McGonagall replied, with the air of one having given this speech before.
"What do you mean by sorted ma'am? How is your House determined?"
"Students in the same House tend to share the same qualities. Gryffindors tend to be brave and loving. Hufflepuffs are loyal and hard-working. Ravenclaws are intelligent and creative. Slytherins are cunning and ambitious. There is a Sorting Ceremony held, where each student is sorted by a charmed hat. The hat can see inside your head and look at your thoughts and memories," after hearing that, Hermione had a panicked face, but then quickly calmed down and hid it, "The hat then decides which House you belong to based off of what it sees in your mind," Professor McGonagall continued, not having seen Hermione's pained expression.
The most important thing in Hermione's world was her mind. Her intelligence was her most important attribute. In fact, it was the only thing she really liked about herself. The library was her paradise that filled her thoughts with adventures. When she was younger and her peers mocked her for the strange things that happened around her, she turned to books. She read all the time. And she was intelligent because of it.
Everyone made fun of her or stared at her for what she now knew were bits of uncontrolled magic. And though the other children made fun of her for being a know-it-all as well, it was the only thing adults seemed to like about her. However, she didn't learn for the sake of being praised, she learned because she loved it. She like the way her mind could make connections and learn just by thinking. Yes, her mind was her temple.
And the thought of someone, something rather, invading her mind and seeing everything that made her alive, well, she didn't like it. In fact, it almost made her sick to think of all her private thoughts and worlds being put on display for anything. How can I keep them out of my head? There must be something they can do. It's such a horrible invasion of privacy that I can't be the first one to be upset about it.
"Is there any other way to be sorted besides the hat, ma'am? Maybe a questionnaire or something?" Hermione asked, though she didn't display how desperate she was to the professor.
"I'm afraid not, Miss Granger. Every student who has ever attended Hogwarts since the Founders died has been sorted by the sorting hat," she replied primly, "It may seem strange to you that an inorganic object can accurately assess you, but I promise that the charm work on it is superb." That wasn't what worried Hermione at all, but she resolved to think about it later.
"Now then, here is your welcome letter, along with your school list," she turned back to the adults, "Most of these supplies will need to be bought in Diagon Alley, which can only be opened by magic. Since you cannot perform magic, I will be accompanying you there. When would be a time that is most convenient to you?"
"Can we do it right now?" asked Jean.
McGonagall was a bit surprised by her rather impatient tone and ready acceptance that their daughter would be going away, but calmly replied, "Certainly, if you wish. The trip will take most of the afternoon. Our first stop will be to Gringott's, which is the bank of wizarding England, that way you can exchange muggle money for galleons."
They discussed typical finances for a moment, and then took a short break to ready themselves for the trip. As Professor McGonagall waited for their return, she contemplated the Grangers. Their behavior seemed just a bit off to her. She had introduced many parents of muggleborn children to the magical world and was familiar with many reactions. The urge to jump right in was not very common, and when it did happen it was usually with excitement rather than impatience. However, the doctors had come across as rather rude as they hadn't introduced themselves or offered tea or tried to make any small talk. Which had happened before, granted, but it was usually because of shock. They hadn't seemed surprised at all. She wasn't very certain what type of people the elder Grangers were.
The young Miss Granger, however, had been extremely polite, if a bit meek. McGonagall had seen her watching her parents avidly to study their reactions to the conversation. And she hadn't looked surprised by anything she had seen, which meant the elder Grangers were most likely behaving as they normally did. Hermione herself seemed very curious and intelligent. McGonagall had a feeling she would grow to like her very much. She's most likely a Ravenclaw or a rather intelligent Hufflepuff.
Miss Granger was the first to return, dressed in a brown jacket that was just a shade lighter than her bushy hair. For the first time, she looked very clearly at the witch beside her and noticed her clothes. They were dark green tartan, but they were not any sort of fashion she had seen before. McGonagall noticed her curious gaze, but waited for Hermione to ask a question. She didn't have to wait long.
"Please pardon me if I'm being rude ma'am, but I couldn't help but notice your clothes are, errr…different. Is that the typical sort of dress for witches," Hermione ducked her head at the potentially insulting question.
McGonagall just smiled and said, "Yes, most witches, and wizards for that matter, wear robes. Some people occasionally dress in muggle clothes, particularly younger ones, but for the most part wizarding society is ignorant of muggle fashion."
Hermione absorbed the fact that she would be most likely be expected to dress in an entirely different manner than she was used to. Then she wondered what other things would be completely different from what she grew up with. If something as simple as clothes is that different, what else am I going to have to acclimate to? For the first time since she learned of magic she grasped what sort of a change this would be. It's all going to be different: history, politics, customs, maybe even a new language! This really is a new world. And I get learn everything! The thought filled her with much excitement and only a little fear. Learning is what she did best after all. The smile on her face was ecstatic.
"Thank you ma'am. I can't wait to get to Hogwarts," Hermione replied, then was struck suddenly by a tantalizing thought, "Is there a library there, Professor?"
"There is indeed Miss Granger. Hundreds of thousands of books that no muggle has ever read," McGonagall replied with a knowing grin. After seeing Miss Granger's smile get impossibly bigger, she thought, almost certainly a Ravenclaw.
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When they arrived at Diagon Alley, Hermione decided that she did not like wizard travel. She glanced back at the empty bottle – the portkey – and was nauseated by the sight. Judging from the looks on her parents' faces, they did not like it either. After the dizziness passed she slowly picked herself up off the ground and looked around. She was amazed by what she saw. Diagon Alley was a narrow, crowded street full of shops with activity everywhere. Everyone was dressed in the odd robes that Professor McGonagall was wearing, and oddly enough, their attire fit into the atmosphere of the buzzing alley. Off in the distance she saw a large white building that towered over everything. It looked like some grand monument built by the ancient Greeks. She asked the professor what it was.
"That, Miss Granger, is Gringott's. It will be our first stop this afternoon," she replied, and gave Hermione some time to take in her first glimpse of wizarding society. Her smile had not diminished since they had left the house. Everything she saw was….magic.
The doctors Granger, on the other hand, did not look quite as thrilled. They seemed quite overwhelmed and huddled together off to the side. They both jumped and Jean gave a short shriek when a miniature blue toy broom zoomed past there head. When McGonagall began to lead the way towards Gringott's, they quickly followed after her and shadowed her every move. They hadn't spoken since the portkey had dumped them on their backsides nearly ten minutes ago.
"Where are we going after Gringott's, Professor?" Hermione asked.
"We will go to Ollivander's to get your wand. I must warn you though, that you will not be allowed to try any magic until you get to Hogwarts. It is a safety hazard to allow underage wizards to practice magic unsupervised," Hermione looked a bit disappointed at this, but McGonagall's next words cheered her up, "Our last stop will be Flourish and Blott's to purchase your school books. There are other books there as well that you may want to buy to learn more about the wizarding world," then McGonagall stopped walking and addressed her properly, "You will be at a disadvantage from your peers, Miss Granger, because you are muggleborn. Most of your future friends will have been born and raised in this world. I'm afraid they will discriminate against you simply because of your birth. But do not fear, I am sure you will overcome any difficulty you encounter."
Hermione was startled by this. She hadn't realized what being a muggleborn meant, and she had a feeling there was much the witch hadn't told her. Nevertheless, she was determined to do anything she could to put herself on even footing with her future classmates. It was a good thing her parents always indulged her in the quest for knowledge, and they would not be surprised at the number of books she requested. It seemed like the only thing they all agreed on. Books are gold.
After opening a small vault and exchanging quite a few pounds for galleons, they were escorted back out into Diagon Alley. Goblins are strange creatures, and not at all what I had pictured. They went to Ollivander's. Hermione's first impression of the strange wizard she met was that he was incredibly eccentric. Her second impression was that he was a genius. She didn't have a clue what any of his measurements or questions meant, and she realized that she was witnessing a master practicing his craft. After he finished questioning her, he proceeded to hand her wands to try out. The first was a dark wand that he said was made of ash and had a unicorn tail for a core. She could feel the magic in it, and when she waved it there were a few blue sparks that shot out of the tip. However, the old man was not satisfied with this reaction.
He made her try wand after wand for the better part of an hour. The only other wand that shot sparks was a vinewood wand with a unicorn core. To Hermione, it felt like the best wand so far, but the small shower of gold sparks was not enough for Ollivander. "You, my dear, are going to need a special wand, I can tell. Yes, your magic is very unique. And powerful," he muttered. Hermione thought he was talking more to himself than to her. "Powerful enough to command any of these wands, but you need a wand that works with you rather than for you."
The greying wizard turned back to the long rows of shelves and walked toward the back corner of the store. When he turned around, the excitement in his face made her think that he must look rather like Einstein did after a great discovery. He handed her the wand to try, and unlike all of the previous wands, he did not tell her what it was made of. The second she touched it, she knew it was hers. When she waved it, midnight blue sparks filled the entire room. "Interesting indeed, my dear. Vinewood, ten and three quarter inches, unyielding," he said, and paused for a moment, "With a core made from the tail of a thestral. It is most suitable for transfiguration, but also for the most powerful dark magic. We will be hearing about you one day Miss Granger, on way or the other," he finished, and though his words and tone were serious, his expression spoke of great delight.
She turned back towards her parents and professor, who had been waiting quietly in a row of chairs along the wall. Her parents looked relieved that she had finally found a wand. Professor McGonagall, on the other hand, wore a worried expression that Hermione only saw part of before the stern teacher face returned. Hermione figured there was something different about her wand, and she didn't like the sound of dark magic. But something told her not to ask either Ollivander or McGonagall about it. "Thank you, sir," she said, and then paid the man the standard price of seven galleons in exchange for her wand.
They all exited the small shop and went about the business of buying the rest of the necessary school supplies, along with a few uniforms and a winter cloak. Professor McGonagall gave explanations about all of the new sites as they went along, though she seemed more reserved than she had earlier. Their very last stop was to Flourish and Blott's, and when they entered Hermione thought she had gone to heaven. There were books literally everywhere since apparently the laws of physics did not apply to wizard kind. "Take care with some of these books Miss Granger. They are not all ordinary. Some of them have a mind of their own and will lash out if mishandled," McGonagall said.
Hermione gathered all of the books on her list and handed them to her parents for safe keeping while she browsed. At the moment, she had two very distinct priorities when it came to information she wanted to gather. The first was a way to protect her mind from the sorting hat and the second was to find out more about her wand and the dark magic Mr. Ollivander had mentioned. Everything else would have to go on the backburner. She had long ago realized that it was not possible to get all of one's questions answered at once and that it was best to pick a few and focus on those.
There was no clear organization pattern to the books, at least to her mind. There were entire categories she had never heard of before like arithmancy and alchemy. She had no clue where to even begin looking for books on mental magic, or if such a thing even existed. It was more than possible there was no way to keep the sorting hat out. After an hour of simply browsing random books, she had only found one that could even be the slightest bit related to her search. She found it on the very bottom shelf in a dusty, abandoned nook of the shop. It was entitled A Beginner's Guide to Self-Control and Self Defense, and it looked older and was bound in leather with a small buckle that held it shut. At first glance it looked like the topics mostly had to do with internal thought and very little to do with magic. Well, it's better than nothing. And after all, I am looking to defend myself.
When she returned to where her parents were waiting for her she realized that she had spent too long searching for her first book, since it was nearly dark outside. Since she knew she didn't have the time to go through the process again to find a book on wands, she just scanned a few titles a grabbed two that jumped out at her. They were Magic: Ethics and Philosophy and Modern History of Wizarding England. She thought that those two should give her decent background knowledge before she started school.
McGonagall looked at the books she had chosen and said, "None of these books directly talk about the use of magic. Perhaps you should find a book that will teach you about spells, hexes, and jinxes. I would suggest this one."
She handed Hermione a thick volume called Everyday Magic. Hermione skimmed through it and was insulted by the simplistic language it used, as though the book were written for morons. Then she remembered that she had very little knowledge of magic, and perhaps the simplicity would help. "Thank you Professor, I'm sure this will be very enlightening," she replied.
Hermione paid for her books and then readied herself for another portkey back to her house.
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Hermione had devoured all of her books the second she returned home. There were references in A Beginner's Guide to Self-Control and Self to a practice called Occlumency, which sounded exactly like what Hermione wanted to learn. However, they were only references, and did not provide much detail. The only usable things she gleaned about it were a few meditation techniques that she followed religiously. After two months of daily meditation, she found that her thoughts were more organized and she felt calmer than she usually did, but she doubted this would make it harder for the hat to see her thoughts. If anything, it would be easier. But she continued anyway because she enjoyed the sense of peace it brought her.
The book she had purchased for her charms class had proved to be the most informative about magic. It would allow her to think about theory and, once she got to Hogwarts, practice. Everyday Magic had very little in it that Hermione found interesting, but she read all of it twice just in case. The most interesting book she had read so far, though, was the potions text. The entire subject seemed enthralling and captivating. It looked hard enough to pose a challenge and had results that could be useful in real life. And so far, this was the only magic she had been able to find that did not require a wand.
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Standing in front of the sorting was terrifying. She was too worked up to even pay attention to her surroundings. All she saw was the hat, and all she heard was its declarations of House for her fellow students. When Professor McGonagall called out Granger, Hermione, she walked slowly up to the hat. She focused on everything she had read and desperately tried to control herself. The book said calmness and self-control was the best possible defense. I need to stop panicking. She immediately started meditating and just barely managed to control herself as she sat down on the stool. She felt the hat slide onto her head and settle on her ears. Think of nothing. Remain calm. Defend yourself. She pictured a foggy lake and concentrated on only letting the hat see that one image.
"My, my, we have a young Occlumens on our hands," the hat murmured to her, "Relax and let me into your head child, so that I can sort you properly."
Hermione betrayed nothing, and concentrated on the lake. "You have power, I'll give you that. But think logically girl. Do you want me to assign you to a random house? That is what happens when I sort an Occlumens who won't give me access, though I haven't had to in nearly three centuries," the hat tried to coax her into letting him in, but Hermione refused, "This is a big decision, girl. Do you want to go somewhere entirely unsuited to you?"
The hat continued to attempt persuading Hermione for a few minutes to no avail. "Very well then. You've got guts, leaving this to chance. One could even say you're being reckless. I've decided. It'll be," the hat paused here, and then belted out, "GYFFINDOR!"
As soon as the hat left her head Hermione sighed in relief and headed toward the cheering table. And even though she felt Gryffindor was the house she felt the least suited to, she was proud to have kept the hat out of her head. She missed the contemplative glance McGonagall shot her. She didn't even realize she had nearly been a hatstall since she had been so focused on remaining calm. She took a glance around at her fellow students and her teachers. This would be her family for the next seven years. And it will be an exciting seven years.
Author's Note
Hello fellow Potterheads! This is my first published fanfic, though I have written a few besides this. There is going to be quite a few changes from canon in this story, but I'm sure you can all cope with that. As for the romance part of the story, there will be nothing between Hermione and Severus until she is of age and graduated, and I am thinking that will be a long time from now. Anyway, I hope you will all enjoy this story!
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, it is the property of the glorious J. K. Rowling.
