"May I kiss the bride?"

Victoria just curled her lips up a little in response, and as Lord Melbourne bent, resplendent in his Windsor Uniform, her stomach ached. She struggled to keep her breath steady as Melbourne touched his lips to her cheekbone. She reached for his hands at once, unable to help herself. His green eyes flashed with something strange then, and a shot of grief went through Victoria as she forced herself to tip her head. She mustered all the warmth she could and said quietly,

"Goodbye, Lord M."

She was leaving him for the night, leaving to go off with Albert to consummate their marriage, but she was leaving him in another way, too. Their days of riding out alone together were gone. Their days of chatting as Victoria sketched Victoria were gone. He could not be hers anymore, not the way he'd been, and she could not be his in any way at all. She was Albert's now.

His eyes flashed again, and this time Victoria swore the candlelight glistened in them as if they'd welled a bit. The words seemed to be ripped from him against his will then as he answered her,

"Goodbye, Ma'am."

She left him then, turning to walk down the carpeted corridor, forcing her feet to take one step after another. Left, right. Left, right. She sped up her steps, afraid she'd turn around and run straight into Melbourne's arms if she didn't. Soon she was running, running away from him in search of the future she could not escape.


She shifted a little where she sat waiting on the bed, pulling a little at the thin fabric of her nightgown and swallowing past the lump in her throat. She'd had dreams about being with a man, about being touched and kissed by a man. The problem was that, at least in her dreams, that man had always been Lord M. But tonight it would be Albert. For the rest of her life, it would be Albert.

She cared deeply for him. He was sweet, if stern, and he was intelligent and careful. She liked him quite a lot as a fellow human, but she did not find herself craving him. Not the way she'd spent months craving Lord Melbourne.

The door opened quietly, and Victoria's breath hitched as she watched Albert enter the room very slowly. He looked frightened, she thought. Actually, he looked terrified. He closed the door with extreme caution, as though the slightest sound of it shutting would ruin all of this. Then he pulled at the sleeves of his shirt and approached Victoria's bed. She rose to stand before him, snaring one arm up around his shoulders, and she tried to be hospitable.

"Is there anything I can get you? Some Madeira?"

"I'm not thirsty. Thank you." His breath trembled like the last leaf on an autumn tree. He shut his eyes for a moment and whispered, "I... erm... perhaps you could lie down, Victoria."

"All right." She was surprised by how nervous he seemed, and on instinct she reached for his face. Albert finally opened his eyes and stared down at her, his gaze struck through with fear. Victoria frowned and then scoffed softly.

"You needn't fear me, Albert," she teased. "I won't bite."

"I know. It's... I am... looking forward to this." Albert seemed to be trying to convince himself of that. Victoria pulled him down for a kiss, but his lips were distant against hers, and he pulled away after just a moment. His hands went to her waist and rubbed a little, but it was off. It was awkward, like he was inspecting something mechanical instead of caressing a woman. Victoria furrowed her brow. This was nothing like the fantasies she'd had.

She climbed silently up onto the bed and slithered back against the pillows. Albert joined her up on the mattress and knelt beside her, studying her as if she were some sort of scientific specimen. Victoria felt her cheeks go hot under the weight of his gaze, and she finally informed him,

"You may touch me."

"Oh. Yes." Albert pulled clinically at the hem of her nightgown and said in an uncertain voice, "You are very beautiful, Victoria. You looked very pretty at the wedding. I liked the flowers you had in your hair."

"You did?" She smiled up at him, reaching for his face and feeling his jaw tighten under her touch. He nodded and kept pulling up her nightgown, and then he whispered,

"There is a particular spot of flesh which, when touched properly, gives the woman a sense of great satisfaction."

"Is that so?" Victoria wriggled a little, feeling uncomfortable with the way he was staring at the place between his legs. Albert sniffed a little and reached his hand down, pressing the pad of one finger between her thighs. She gasped at the sudden motion, and she sat up a little in surprise when Albert began to massage her. She felt herself flush a little wet, for the place he was touching was indeed sensitive. But Albert seemed almost disgusted by what he was doing. His face twisted a little, and she could tell he was holding his breath.

"Does that feel good?" His eyes found hers at last, and Victoria nodded quickly.

"Yes, it feels good," she admitted. She didn't know much about any of this, but she knew that a man's organ lay between his own legs, and so she reached there. Men went hard before they entered women, she'd been told. But she didn't feel anything hard in Albert's breeches. She dragged her fingertips around, trying to find the thing that was supposed to enter her body, but Albert twisted away a little and shook his head.

"I am... not ready yet," he said. He quickened his finger on Victoria, and suddenly she could sense it. She could feel the absence of his desire just as plainly as he would have been able to feel the presence of it. He didn't want her. Not like this.

"Albert." She reached for his hand and pulled it away from her womanhood, watching as he quickly wiped his fingers on the sheets. She scowled and sat up slowly, and she asked him, "Is it just nerves? Tell me it's just nerves."

"I... have never been with a woman, Victoria," he said, a little defensively. His high cheekbones coloured pink then, and he averted his gaze to the wall as he added, "It has been a very long day. Perhaps I shall be more ready tomorrow. I do not think... I do not suspect I will become firm enough for you. I am sorry, Victoria. Really, I am."

"Albert," she said again, watching as he picked at the sheets and shut his eyes. She took a long breath and asked him plainly, "Do you think often of doing it? Of being with a woman in this way?"

"No." He shook his head. "This act will be... difficult for me, I think."

Victoria let her eyes flutter shut then, and she felt sick to her stomach. She shook her head wildly and whispered in a frantic tone,

"You have to... we have to... we are married, Albert. This is something married people do."

"I know." He sounded pained then, and he reached to stroke carefully at her bare arm. He was gentle then, and there was nothing erotic in his touch. He was comforting her, and it did feel good in its own way to be touched like this by him. Victoria opened her eyes and saw him smile quite sadly.

"Is it me?" She let him keep rubbing her arm. "Is it just me, or is it all women? Tell me I am not the only reason for your lack of desire."

"Oh, Victoria. It is not you." Albert sighed and gnawed on his lip. "I am so very honoured to be your husband. I could not have possibly asked for a better wife. As as a younger son, penniless and without anything to offer, this situation is particularly fortuitous. I had to marry, you understand. I just got lucky in marrying you, but I had to marry no matter what, you understand."

"But you don't actually want a wife," Victoria guessed. "Not her body, anyway."

Albert shrugged. "I will do my best. Here. Here, try again."

He reached for her hand and smashed it against his breeches. He wrenched his eyes shut and seemed to be concentrating hard on an idea in his mind. Victoria felt a twinge of discomfort as he worked her fingers against his crotch. He didn't firm up beneath her touch, not even a little bit. His ears went scarlet and his neck visibly tightened, and he finally shook his head regretfully. Victoria pulled her hand away, remembering the rumours she'd heard about certain men.

"Albert," she said carefully, knowing that she might offend him beyond recompense now. "Albert, do you even... want women? I mean to say, are you attracted to the female form?"

He was silent then, his eyes shut and his fingers cinching on his knees. He finally shook his head, very slowly, and he mumbled,

"I will do my very best to be a good husband for you. To be a good consort of the Queen of England. I adore you. You are beautiful and kind. You are a good Queen. You are -"

"A woman," Victoria finished for him, "and you have no desire for the body of a woman."

Albert opened his eyes and promised her, "I have every desire to spend every waking moment with you. I want to make you happy. I want to be the best friend you could want, Victoria."

"Friend," she repeated, her chest aching as tears welled up in her eyes. She sniffles and demanded, "Do you desire men instead?"

"I have never been with anyone," Albert insisted, but Victoria snapped,

"If you could be with a man, would you?"

He hesitated, and then he shrugged and huffed out a little breath. "I... I don't know. Probably. Please, Victoria; you can't tell anyone that I -"

"I won't tell," she promised. She reached for Albert's hand and squeezed it, and she let him wipe away the tears that were streaking down her cheeks. She studied his face and suddenly felt very sorry for him. How lonely it must be, she thought, to want something he could never have. Something he wasn't allowed to have. Then she realised she felt that way herself, about Lord Melbourne, and she rubbed at Albert's hand as she told him,

"We shall be very good friends, you and I. And if you find... if there is someone else that you..."

"I would say the same for you," Albert told her seriously. "I want to make you happy, Victoria, and as your husband, as your consort, I know that there are certain types of happiness I will not be able to give you."

Suddenly Victoria wanted to go find Melbourne, to tell him everything and demand he kiss her on the lips since her husband would never want to do that to her. Instead she reached for Albert's face and cradled his jaw, and she said quietly,

"Let us make a very solemn vow. We shall do everything in our power to make one another happy, for we are bound together forever by God and the law. We shall be very good friends, and we shall allow one another whatever other sources of happiness we require. Will you make me that promise, Albert?"

He nodded slowly. "I gladly make that promise, Victoria."

She released his hand then, trying to shove away the profound disappointment and rejection that was rippling through her veins. She closed her eyes and told him,

"You looked so handsome during the wedding, Albert. I am glad to be your wife."

"I... shall sleep in my own rooms, if you do not mind," Albert said then, and Victoria just nodded. She felt him kiss her cheek, just like Lord M had done earlier. Albert rubbed at her arm again and whispered,

"I am so sorry, Victoria."

"Goodnight, Albert." She kept her eyes shut as his weight shifted on the bed, and she listened to his soft footsteps as he walked away. She listened to the door open and shut, and then she collapsed down onto the pillows and began to cry.

She needed Melbourne, now more than ever. She needed to talk to him, to hold his hands, to sob against his chest. But he wasn't there. She'd bid him farewell.

Two days. Victoria would only be at Windsor for two days. Then she would be back in London, back to her duties as the monarch. And when she was, she had every intention of confessing everything to Lord M.

Author's Note: Hi, there! Yes, I'm back to writing Vicbourne. Couldn't stay away for long. I'll also be updating my Man in the High Castle fic, though that one may only get every-other-day updates. The idea for this story comes from a fellow Vicbourne fan who had a very cool prompt she wanted to see written. Thank you for reading - I'd love to hear from you if you get a chance to review. :)