Hey guys! Thanks so much for checking this story out! The first chapter was a little difficult to write, but I can promise the next ones will be better. I've already written them and they flowed WAY better.

Enjoy!

SPN

"Are you sure Abby?" Mary asked as she tried to breath properly. They were in Abby's kitchen, she had called Mary and said she'd had a vision. Now they were hunched over her granite counter. The bright yellow walls and white cupboards and matching appliances doing little to brighten the mood.

"Mary, I'm just telling you what I saw. You're only five months pregnant, there's still time to... you know..." Abby gestured with her hands. "Your safety is more important then the baby's."

"But he's my son!" She exclaimed. "I know he's alive... How could I..."

Abby placed her hands on her shoulders. "Because both of you will die anyway." Abby's expression twitched for a second, but Mary couldn't catch why. "Please Mary... Just think of Dean and John..."

She turned away and gripped the counter's edge, her stomach resting against it. It was obvious to anyone who was curious that she was pregnant, her stomach was round and the baby even kicked every once in a while. Not half as much as Dean though, he was the most difficult child to ever be carried.

"Abby, how could I live with myself if I did this?" Mary questioned. She wasn't even aware she was crying until the tears dripped on the top of her hand.

Abby smiled faintly. "You could do exactly that. You could live."

SPN

Mary packed a small bag before hopping in the car. John's impala. He loved this car and even though their son was only four, he couldn't wait to teach him how to fix it, and drive it. She smiled at the thought.

John waved as she pulled out and drove away. She couldn't tell him why this was happening. She couldn't drag him into hunting, no matter how much she wanted his support. She would just tell him it was a miscarriage, that the baby died, not that she killed it.

She tried to hold herself together as she drove. She didn't need to crash, she needed to live. That was the entire reason this was happening. Because she needed to live. And because her baby was going to die anyway. She'd rather him die before he could have memories. Or at least that's what she told herself.

She tried to distract herself with the gorgeous snow and trees. It was the day after New Year's and Kansas was absolutely beautiful. The qaint little town was sprinkled with snow and foliage. Small houses with minimal Christmas decorations glowed warmly. A tear slipped as she thought about how her baby wouldn't live long enough to appreciate any of this, whether she did this or not.

She turned the radio on, but the music didn't help.

She realized she wasn't doing this for the baby, she was doing this for herself. She didn't want to remember the baby, she didn't want to hold a child in her arms and then have him snatched away by the devil's hand maid. She didn't want to have a second child, and then, not.

She didn't want to have the baby, because she didn't want to loose him.

She turned into the abortion clinic's parking lot and tried not to loose it as she cut the engine.

She wiped her eyes, got out of the car, and walked in.

SPN

"Are you sure Mrs. Winchester?" The doctor asked. He could see the doubt in her eyes.

She nodded. "Please just do it all ready." She was in a hospital room, machines beeping around her as she lay in the hospital bed. She had her hands on her stomach and she could feel the baby's foot. Small, but definitely there. She felt a tear slide down her cheek.

The doctor grabbed the mask and was about to put it up to her face when she grabbed his arm and looked him in the eye. "Tell my husband I did this for him and my son. Tell him I love him, and this was for him."

The doctor nodded. "I will, and don't worry, you'll be fine, and wake up before you know it." He placed the mask over her face.

Just before she slipped into unconsciousness, she felt the foot move. Her baby, her son, but it was too late. It was too late to save him. She couldn't speak and she couldn't save him.

It was too late for her to change her mind. There wasn't any going back. She tried to move her mouth, tell the doctor she wanted him. That she needed him. That she didn't care anymore, she wanted to see him even if only for a few months. But she didn't have time.

She passed out.

SPN

Dean was taking a nap when John got the call. "Is this Mr. Winchester?"

"Yes. May I ask who this is?" He lowed his voice and went onto the porch. The house was small and he didn't want to wake his son up.

"This is doctor Jameson, I'm calling to let you know that something went wrong with your wife's abortion," his voice filled with fake sympathy and John tried not to laugh. This guy must have the wrong number, Mary would never have an abortion. But then why had he asked for Mr. Winchester?

"What abortion?" he tried to calm his building panic.

The doctor. "Something went wrong. You wife is in critical condition, and her fetus, it survived."

John's knees collapsed. "What?"

The doctor continued on. "We're afraid that we're losing your wife, but the fetus survived. It's missing a part of it's left arm, elbow down, but other then that is fine."

John felt his cheeks heat up. "That fetus is my child. Was it a boy or a girl?"

"It's male," the doctor droned. How a human being could be so calm about something like this was beyond John, but personally he didn't care.

"I'll be there in thirty tops."

Over the next ten minutes he had asked the Mrs. Field to watch Dean until Bobby got there and had borrowed the Mrs. Field's truck. He reached the clinic ten minutes later and ran inside. Everything was a blur.

The doctor was waiting for him in the lobby. John didn't listen to what he was saying. He pushed and shoved his way into the hall behind him. The rooms were all empty. Except one. And in it was a still body under a black tarp.

"No..." He gripped the door to keep himself from sliding to the ground. It didn't help. He began to convulse. "Mary..."