Practice College Essay: Write About Anything
Thwap.
I glanced up from my chocolate milk just in time to see my friend Kara slide into the seat across from me. As my gaze traveled to the tabletop I noticed a stack of lined paper sitting in front of my lunch tray that hadn't been there before. I blinked. I looked at Kara.
"Help."
"Huh?"
She gestured at the pile of papers. "It's my story. The Fullmetal Alchemist-slash-Dragonball Z crossover I've been writing. I'm stuck. I wrote myself into a hole, and don't know how to get out." She fixed me with an amused look. "So, 'help'."
I picked up the top page. It was covered in very neat, light handwriting. I put it back down. "Kara," I said, trying too add as much patience into the words as possible, "I don't know a thing about Dragonball Z"
"So?"
Seeing that this wasn't going to get me anywhere worthwhile, I put down my chocolate milk and picked up the first page again. 'Oh my aching head, Ed thought. Where the hell am I?...'
Roughly five minutes later I looked up from the last page to see that Kara had stolen five of my fries and was watching me read with great interest. "Well?" she asked. "Any ideas?"
I stole my lunch tray back to my side of the table. "Stop eating my fries. And maybe you could come up with some way of Ed to contact his world...I dunno, maybe that inventor-women could come up with it?"
"You mean Bulma." Kara corrected me, taking back the papers and putting them back in her bag. "See you tomorrow!"
"See ya," I responded, returning to my lunch.
A few days later, she asked for help again. And a few days after that. And a few days after that. By the same time the following week I was her official muse.
That weekend I found myself sliding to the floor in the local Barns & Noble with the first three books of Dragonball in my lap. After that I understood the story a whole lot more.
"..reduced fat milk with Vitamin A palpitate and Vitamin D3 added, high fructose corn syrup (that's sugar, right?), cocoa processed with alkali (What the hell is that?) cellulose gel, (ew...) nonfat milk (why is that one of the last ingredients?) calcium carbonate, sugar, cellulose gum, Guar (huh?) gum, Xanthan gum, salt? SALT! Why is there SALT in my milkshake?!" I turned to Kara indignantly, driven out of my boredom-induced reading of my milkshake ingredients.
She glanced up briefly from where she was writing the next chapter of our story, 'Alchemy and Saiyens'. "How should I know?"
"It's a milkshake! It's not supposed to have salt!"
"Uh-huh." Her eyes returned to the page in front of her.
"This is ridiculous. Who would put salt in a milkshake? It makes no sense!" I was glaring at the bottle now. Kara was fighting back laughter, the story forgotten. "I am going to sue Nestle! I will go to... to.." I looked at the bottle. "Nestle USA, Inc, Glendale, CA, 91203 USA © Nestle and DEMAND to know why there is salt in my milkshake!"
Kara lost the battle with her laughter, cracking up. When she finally stopped, she turned to me. "Hey Franchesca, you know how some people on ff. net have their muses write disclaimers for them?"
"Uh huh." I could see where she was going with this.
"Wanna do one for me? This would be great..."
I considered it. "Hand me some paper."
She handed me one. "You'll need a penname. Mine's It walks alone."
I considered this, pencil above the paper. "How about 'BritKit'? Thats what my account is under."
"Except wont let you log on."
"Except wont let me log on," I agreed, beginning to write.
"-just five more minutes! I have four pages left, Kara, four pages!!" I swatted Kara's hand away from where it was trying to steal my book.
"I need plot!!"
"Just a minute!!" I hastily devoured the last few pages of Libba Bray's Rebel Angles, taken out of the library that morning. Finally, I closed the book. "Now," I turned to Kara. "What is it that you needed?"
"Plot!" She repeated, shoving a piece of paper and a pencil at me.
"Right, right." I sighed, half my mind still in the world of Gemma and Felicity and Anne. "Where did we leave off?"
Librarian: What are you two doing, anyways?
BK: (very perky all of a sudden) Plotting to take over the world!
SKM: (hits BK with book) No we're not!
(librarian leaves)
SKM:(shifty eyes)
SKM: (spreads maps on table, over IWA's writing) So we'll attack Australia from THIS direction...
IWA: (notices she's writing on world domination maps, not her story paper) Oi!
BK & SKM: (look up)
IWA: If you two don't mind, couldyoupleasegetyourmapsoffmystory!
BK & SKM: O.O Mweep
IWA: Not that I have anything against world domination...
BK: (mutters) I should hope not, you're helping.
"Alright, so we have Ed fussing about Bulma moving Al from Amestris to Chikiyuu-" We were at the lunch table again, except it was study hall. Kara and I were talking over the plot for our next chapter. Across the table, Kara's friend Mordecai was spinning a penny.
Kara nodded. "- and Bulma bringing him across once Ed's gone to bed. Then breakfast and Al waking Ed up-"
"And Ed spazzing," I added.
She grinned. "Yup. and then Goten coming home from the fair with the fish, and -"
"-Gohan's nefarious-plan-that-will-not-be-mentioned-until-the-next-chapter." I finished, grinning back.
"Great." she stuck a paper and the pencil she always lent me on the table. "Start writing"
"Double sided tape!" Mordecai said happily, from across the table. Kara and I stared at him. Then each other.
"Moving on," I tried not to laugh as I clicked the lead out of the pencil. Beside me, Kara was having no such luck.
"Put that in the Disclaimer!!" she managed through giggles.
Mustang- "What does the Fuhrer wish to see me about?"
they turn corner
Sloth- The Fuhrer does not wish to see you. I do
M- what?
S- I require information.
M- from me.
S- smile
M- And If I do not wish to give you such information?
Sloth glance him, amused.
S- My dear colonel, we dont need you for information
They turn corner...
I scribble the last few lines of the plotsheet before finally placing the pencil down and stretching my hands. Kara and I had come a long way in a year. Alchemy and Saiyens was finished, and we were now working on its sequel: Gohan in Amestris. Now if she would just get here...
Right on time, I felt someone poke my arm, and looked over to see Kara sliding into the chair next to me, dropping her bag to the floor. "Plot?"she asks.
I hand it to her. "Just finished."
She settles it in front of her, scanning the lines with practiced ease. We'll have to do this differently next year. Kara is a year older than I, and will be at college.
Ah, the wonders of email, how useful thou will be...
I turn back to my lunch. "So, Kara..."
She is still reading. "Mm?"
"I have to do this practice college essay for English..." I start.
She nods absentmindedly. A senior, and applying early decision to her first choice, she already knows about that sort of thing. So do I, actually, seeing as I beta-read her college essay. "Whatchya gonna write about?"
I lift my carton of chocolate milk and smile a bit. "Actually, I was thinking about writing about us..."
