Hi there, well, this is the first chapter to my first ever Final Fantasy VII story. It hasn't been edited, and I don't even know if I'm going to continue it. What I want, are people's opinons. Is it over-done? Horrible? Okay? Really good? I want to know if I should continue it, some changes that need to be made, and etc. I'd love for some of you to give me feedback, I honestly wish to become a better writer. So... yeah, hopefully, enjoy the first chapter, and maybe I can get off my lazy butt and continue it.

btw, blah blah, disclaimer, I own none of these characters. They belong to Square Soft, yeah, don't sue :)

A Final Fantasy VII Fanfiction

Lost. Not a week into his training, and already he messed up. Never would he become a soldier like this, stumbling down the hall of the overly large building, feeling extremely awkward as his superiors stared at him as if he were mere scum. All the blonde knew was that he was not where he was supposed to be, and that these people around him, SOLDIERS, scared him.

Why won't someone help, Why won't someone tell me where to go? Come on, I may just be a cadet, but someone has to care at least a little! Ah! I need to calm down; I can't be a scared little wimp if I ever want to become a SOLDIER.

The boy mentally scolded himself as he continued walking aimlessly, no longer really paying attention now to the people around him. "What are you doing here?" His heart nearly stopped as his eyes traveled up the tall form, stopped, mystified, by cold mako-green orbs. He nearly fell, wavering slightly as he tried his best to salute.

"S-sir! I am.... I got l-lost..." The general's eyes stayed locked on the trainee SOLDIER, causing the boy's cheeks to turn a faint crimson.

"You realize you're not allowed to be here... this area is restricted to everyone but the real SOLDIERS." The legendary general growled that in his soft piercing voice. "You won't get away without punishment..." his gaze never left the blonde as the boy automatically dropped to the floor and started to do push-ups. "Get up!" he growled. "I'm not your drill leader..." The man's eyes scanned the youth once again, as if contemplating something, as if he just realized something very interesting.

"No, Strife.... I have something much more interesting, and physically demanding, then push-ups. Lucky you... I was just starting to get bored." The boy could do nothing as his boss, the general, practically dragged him into his nearby sleeping quarters, and shoved him roughly to the bed....


It was nearly two years ago, when I first met General Sephiroth in person, when he first made me into what I am today, dirty, impure, and worthless. It's almost routine now, after training, before training, anytime he wants to, regardless to when it is or what I am doing, I am his now. I am his property, and really, that's the only reason why I am in SOLDIER.

SOLDIER… It was once my dream... but, now it feels more like a nightmare.

He told me that the Mako injections would up my stamina, that's all my master wants. I am no soldier, simply his SOLDIER play-toy.

"Yo, Earth to Cloud. Chocobo head." I winced slightly as he flicked the back of my head. "You were in one of your trances again." Zack raised a brow when I frowned at him, successfully breaking out of my trance. "Seriously, I don't care if it's none of my business. Why do you always do that? I'm your friend, right, then why don't you let it out?" It seemed at least once a week, for the past couple of years, Zack would bother me, try to get information from me. And, day by day, I was closer to telling.

"Zack, no. I was just thinking, stop asking." I can't tell him, no matter how much I want it. Seph--- Master, General, would punish me. I involuntarily shudder, causing Zack to look at me with some concern. I still can't tell though... he'd probably punish him too. I can't let that happen, Zack, he's the only one who still calls me a friend, who acts like a friend to me. I feel a hand touch mine, and instinctively pull away.

"Come on Cloud, let's get to class." I follow the fellow SOLDIER, looking to the rain dampened ground, as I always do, the whole way there. For now, I bury all emotion inside; I am worthless, I mean nothing, I don't deserve a friend... don't mess up, don't ruin it all, cause I'm already ruined.


I hear myself scream into a world that is nothing but black. I know tears are falling from my eyes, but I do not feel them. Filled with him, tainted by him, I am his.
He finishes with me, and alike to every other time, leaves me there, curled up, because I am nothing... nothing more than a puppet.

Some time later, hours, minutes, I don't know, I hear a knock at the door. I pretend to be asleep, I pull the covers over my broken body.

My dreams that night are just like the ones of every other night, my superior having his way with me, tearing me from the inside. I wish they would stop, but, I know they won't. Not until he gets bored with me, tosses me aside... but even then, I am unsure if the dreams will go away.

When I wake, thankful that it is a Sunday and thus there are no training sessions or whatnot, I do not get up for quite a while. Instead, I smile, a rare occurrence. Mornings, they are pure, a new day, a rising sun. Maybe, someday, a new sun will rise, bringing purity to me at last. I chuckle that sound unsuccessfully masking pain. I know that will never happen, but still, the mornings somehow manage to bring me hope, I don't want to forget that. So, the same as almost every morning, I take the notebook from the desk beside my bed and scribble the words that went through my head just moments before.

Another knock at the door, this time I recognize the distinct rhythm that could only be Zack... tap-thwap-tap. "One sec!" I call, cringing as I realize how hoarse my voice is thanks to physical stress and from just waking up. Hurriedly I get dressed, ignoring the pain that surges through my body every time I move. Also hurriedly, I make my bed so that the blood, my blood, is completely hidden. I look around, making sure everything is perfect, before I open the door for my fellow SOLDIER.

"Hey man, that took forever, did you have to hide the woman or something?" He grinned and winked, mussing up the youth's already messy hair as well. "Don't worry I won't tell." Zack laughed.

"I'm not hiding anyone..." Cloud frowned, looking up through his hair in an 'I'm annoyed but kind of joking' manner.

"Whatever, kid. Anyways, I was thinking, wanna hit the beach? It's finally warming up enough to swim!" Cloud cringed, swimming... it used to be so fun, but, I can't show myself... I'm dirty, battered, and... my skin is for his eyes only now.

"No. I'm really tired, plus, kind of bruised up from training... salt water sounds kind of painful." This time, it was Zack's turn to frown.

"Come on, spiky, salt water would actually help..." He paused, observing the youth's glossed-over eyes, tightly pursed lips, and sad expression. "Cloud... you're getting worse. Whatever is wrong with you, it's obviously not getting better... why won't you talk to me?" One glance at the SOLDIER's expression told Cloud that Zack was genuinely worried, and really wanted to help his friend. A part of his brain wanted his friends help, called out for it. But, his mouth stayed sealed.

"You go on, I have some studying to do anyways." The blonde smiled, not a real smile like that morning, but one that was fake, meant only to fool. And it did. Zack, his only real friend, was relieved to see his smile, and feeling much better, tricked, he left Cloud to be, once again, alone.

I strip out of the clothing I had just put on as I walk towards the bathroom connected to my room. As always, my eyes avoid the mirror: bruises and marks still adorn my skin; I don't need, or want, to look. Just for a few minutes, the hot water that is soon running from the shower-head massages my tense back. I enjoy the feeling, ignoring the slight pain due to pressure and heat against my wounds. I close my eyes and tilt my head back to let the water try and erase the feeling of his rough lips. Shuddering, though I feel far from cold, I continue on with lathering the cloth held in my right hand and I try my best to clean myself.

Ten minute later I am sitting cross-legged on my bed, towel wrapped around my waist but barely covering me due to my position. As my nightmare comes back, I wish, but I also fear, maybe he'll soon be bored of me... I doubt it.

Blocking the images from my minds, I close my eyes, pretending I am back at Tifa's house, watching her strong feminine hands glide over the keys of her piano as she teaches me some of her favourite songs. No longer am I sitting on the pale blue comforter on my bed, wrapped in a pure white towel. Instead I'm wearing the clothing of any ordinary boy in Nibelheim, sitting on the lavender and black patterned blankets that cover my friend's bed.

I lose myself in my dream, my illusionary world, of being back home, secure, clean. Even as the door slides open, and a tall figure glides towards me with feline-like elegance, I stay in my trance.

"Cadet..." I hear him purr maliciously in my ear, successfully drawing me back into my nightmare. I am not startled, I don't jump, I don't even open my eyes as I feel the towel practically torn from around my waist. When they do open, they, alike to the general's, are the shining green of mako. Unlike his, though, they do not glow with hunger, but instead hold an emotionless, icy dull.

"Yes... sir."

Awww, poor Cloudy-boy. So, yes. I realize Clouds emo-ness may seem over the top... but, if you think about what he is going through, I think it's okay? Now, I'm not very good at receiving criticism, but, I'd really appreciate it. As I said, this is barely edited, and will be removed after I get enough reviews. I just want to know what people think, so, please, give an opinion? (ps. it's not gonna be so emo the whole way through, things happen (don't want to give away spoilers .) and things get better for poor Cloud.)

Ps. though it'll be explained if I do a next chapter, please don't be all like "it was so stupid that Sephi did this to Cloud just because he got lost" there's more to it than that. There's more reason, and it involves their connection, and Cloud being a 'puppet', and just... yeah. It's not random and just because he happened to be where he wasn't supposed to be.