Hi guys! To the people who are new here, welcome! To the people who read my last fanfic, welcome back! So, just as a quick summary, this is a story about what would have happened if Jonathan(Morgenstern, duh!) didn't die at the end of City of Heavenly Fire. If you guys are still with me, here we go! Btw, I might make this rated M later on depending on how this goes!

*Please note that I don't own the characters, Cassandra Clare does, I only own the plot*

~Sara

Clary could hear Sebastian screaming, and over that, the cries of the endarkened. The noise stopped as suddenly as it started. She looked up to see that the fire was gone, though the ground and both thrones were blackened, the gold on them, charred, burned and melted.

Sebastian lay a few feet away from her, on his back. There was a great hole across the front of his chest. He turned his head slowly toward her, his face white with pain, and her heart contracted.

His eyes were green.

"You," he whispered, and she stared at him, unable to look away. His face had no color, like paper stretched over bone. She didn't dare to look at his chest, where his jacket had fallen away, and she could see blackness across his shirt, like a spill of acid. "You put..the heavenly fire...into the blade of the sword," he said. "It was...cleverly done."

It was a rune, that's all it was," she said, kneeling , her eyes searching his. He looked completely different, not just his eyes but the whole shape of his face. His jawline was softer, his smile without it's cruel shape. "Sebastian..."

"No. I-I'm not him. I'm-Jonathan," he whispered. "I'm Jonathan. Jonathan Christopher."

The endarkened crept toward Clary, shouting, "Kill the girl!"

Jonathan struggled to sit upright. "No!" he shouted hoarsely. "Get back!"

The endarkened froze in confusion. Then, pushing past them came Jocelyn.

"Mother?" Jonathan said. He was staring, almost like he couldn't quite focus on her. He began to cough. Blood ran from his mouth. His breath rattled in his lungs.

I dream sometime, of a boy with green eyes, a boy who was never poisoned with demon blood, a boy who could laugh, cry, and be human. That's the boy I wept over, but that boy never existed.

Jocelyn's face hardened, as if she were protecting herself from something. She knelt down by Jonathan's head and drew him up onto her lap. Clary stared; she never could have brought herself to touch him like that, but then, her mother has always blamed herself for Jonathan's existence. There was something in her expression that showed that because she had brought him into this world, she would see him out.

As soon as he was propped up, Jonathan's breathing eased. There was bloody foam on his lips. "I'm sorry," he said with a gasp. "I am so..." His eyes tracked to Clary. "I know there is nothing I could do or say now that would allow me to die with even a shred of grace," he said. "And I wouldn't blame you if you cut my throat. But I am..I regret. I'm...sorry."

Clary was speechless. What could she say? It's all right? But it wasn't. Nothing he had done in his life was right, not in this world, not to her. There were things that you could never forgive.

Yet he had not done those things. This person, was not Sebastian, the one who had tortured and murdered and brought destruction.

"Don't," he said, and half closed his eyes. "I see you trying to sort it out. I-" He coughed, more blood appearing on his lips. "I never existed at all. Heavenly fire burns away everything that is evil. Jace survived glorious because he is good. There was enough of him left to live, but I was brown to be evil. There is not enough of me left to survive. You see the ghost of what I could have been. You should hate me. Rejoice when I die. The last thing I want would be to bring you more grief."

"I don't hate you," Clary said firmly. "I hate Sebastian. I don't hate you. Maybe this is who you really are. A good person. You deserve to live."

"That's a beautiful lie to believe," he said, and a smile passed over his face. "The fire of glorious burnt away the demon's blood. All my life it has scorched my veins, weighed me down like lead-my whole life, and I never even knew. I never knew. I've never felt so...light," he said softly, and then he smiled and closed his eyes.

"No..No. You're not dead. You can't be! Please, Jonathan. Please!" Clary cried, shaking his shoulders.

"It's no use. We have to go." Jocelyn said firmly.

"I...can't. No. I won't. He has to come back." Clary said, her hands shaking, struggling to hold the stele in her hands. C'mon Clary Morgenstern. You have to do this. She thought to herself. She didn't even notice the tears streaming down her face.

"Clary. Don't you think it's time to give up? We can get over it, together. I mean, good riddance!" Jace said. Jocelyn gave him a look of warning.

Clary's shoulders shook in pure fury and grief. "Don't you think I'm trying? Don't you? But unlike some people, Jonathan Christopher Morgenstern deserves a second chance at life. No, I can't get over it. Because I don't want to. I won't. Not until he comes back." C'mon, Clary. You have to make your power work. She thought.

She placed the stele on Sebastian's heart. Then, she drew something she never thought she was capable of. A twist between the iratze rune and the rune of love. Please, she thought. If not for yourself, for me. For our mother. For a second chance to right your wrongs.

She waited for so long...hours. Until Jocelyn finally broke the silence with Jace. "We have to go."

But then she heard a cough. Then a gasp. Clary's eyes brightened with new hope, drawing the rune on Jonathan once more. Please. Come back to me. Jonathan's eyes opened, bright green, gasping one word.

"Clary!" Jonathan sat upright once more.

Okay...so what do you guys think? Please don't be afraid to give me feedback! Love you all! XOXO

~Sara