disclaimer:I do not own these characters/places/etc. Stephenie Meyer does. I've just taken what she's given me and have run with it.
Nine Weddings But Ours...
One: Proposals
Hunting was in reality the only way to pass the time this lame, BOR-ing Saturday afternoon- Which is exactly what me and Jake did.
Call it odd, but half the time we went out and killed stuff together- no- not in the sadistic 'only to hear you scream, dear' way, but in the 'hunting for survival' kind of way. Even though me and Jake could survive perfectly well on human food, and it was always provided at the Cullen house hold. Scratch that- Billy had fallen from his wheel chair, and had broken his leg like a twig. Carlisle had insisted (and by that I mean had all but carried him out the door in handcuffs, kicking and screaming) that he move in with us, which gave Jake the perfect excuse to move in with Billy. So for now, it was the Cullen/Black/ supernatural central household.
Anyways, Jake and I were hunting as I said before. Deer were the choice of prey, mainly because it was tasty and the only thing available at the moment. We stood in the bushes, watching them graze in the open field in the middle of the woods- go figure. Esme had said that the land used to be crown land, and had been farmland for over four hundred years before it was abandoned and Esme fell in love with the ancient farm house (which she'd totally re-vamped, no pun intended). So I figured that the field was actually field, field.
I rested my hand on the wolf, aka Jake's fur.
I showed him our best tactic, by my eyes. I'd go left, quietly, and Jake would herd the deer into my waiting arms. I'd grab two, one in each arm. It was all we needed- if we took any more, there'd be no herd anymore to hunt. Jake growled, which I took as a yes.
"Good. So you understand me, then?"
He nodded.
"Great." Off I ran, silently and quickly. It turned out Vamp/human ( my version- Vamun) hibyrds were faster then the actual full blood vamps- so daddy and mum didn't stand a chance against me in any race. I quickly got to my position in no more then a second, without a twig breaking to alert the deer of our presence.
"One, two, three!" I whispered, knowing he'd hear me.
Jake burst out from the woods, snarling with glee at the running deer. They ran right on course, and I quickly caught one under each arm, and just as swiftly broke their necks, letting the others run terrified. Jake did his traditional 'laugh growl' that always signaled he was laughing inside.
"Which do you want?" I said, dropping the deer and sitting between them. Jake nudged the one on the left. "Fine, she's all yours." I dug into the other and drank deeply.
It was never as good as the human blood I'd have while nursing, but it was pretty close, everything considered. Jake announced he was done his meal by tearing the jugular out of the deer, which sprayed me with blood- staining my cream and pink stripped shirt with red.
"Why you-" I tackled Jake, and he rolled me over, licking my face like a puppy. I kneed him off me and was on my feet in an instant, Jake in a crouch.
"Race you to the river!" I was off in a flash, and Jake close behind me.
Sensing he was closing in, I swung up on a low hanging tree branch, and climbed my way to the woods, taking a shortcut.
But, sadly, by the time I got to the river, Jake was pacing beside it, human, at least in appearance, and clothed (thank god, or Daddy would kill him, quite literally). He seemed nervous. Deciding to surprise him, I swung soundlessly to a tree who's branches were above his path. I stepped down onto the nearest branch, and when he came close, I flipped down.
"Boo!" I cried out, upside down.
"Jesus Christ!" Jake jumped back, utterly shocked. Then when he saw it was me, he walked up and shook my shoulders playfully.
"You nearly killed me!" He cried in fake panic, and I laughed before swinging down to solid ground.
"You won."
"Yes. I did." His chest swelled with pride. I walked up to him, and pushed against his chest.
"Yeah, but that's only cause I tried to cheat, and it didn't work. So there!"
"So you admit to cheating, then?"
"I confess. Was I who did the horrible act!" I fake pleaded, "Please forgive me, oh great alpha!" That was what Seth and the others called him when he got all 'authority figure'.
"Well," Jake said in fake thought, "You do sound pretty remorseful, so I think I can cut you some slack... If..."
"If what?"
"If you marry me?" there was a pause here, followed by me shaking my head and replying, dumbly,
"Say what?"
"You'll be pardoned if you marry me."
"Serious?"
"Maybe." Jake reached into his pocket- and found nothing. "Ummm..."
"This is unplanned, right?"
"Yeah. So please answer yes/no, and then you and I can either find the ring, or you can just kill me for embarrassment."
"So this was planned?"
"No, not really. The entire 'redeem yourself' routine came to me only after you swung down from that tree."
"Oh. Huh," I think I'm in shock. "So, what was the original plan?"
"Oh, very soap opera, very posh, very cheesy, very-"
"Alice?"
"Yep pretty much."
"So you're, serious?" he nodded.
"Your line is 'yes of coarse I'll marry you, or, you can improvise with a 'how dare you, you flea bitten dog!"
"How about, I was gonna marry you seven years ago, but I was a newborn? That work?"
Jake thought for a moment.
"So that's a yes?" he said, slowly.
"Yes!" I jumped him, forcing him into a hug. Then, I kissed him frantically everywhere on his face. When done, I jumped down, and quite literally sang, "I'm getting married! I'm getting married!"
"Um, excuse me?"
"Sorry." I stopped, then started up again. "We're getting married, we're getting married! We're getting married!"
"That's better. Though," He looked sarcastically serious, "I should warn you,"
"What, pray tell?"
"Till you have a ring, nothing's set in stone."
"Oh."
"Yeah."
"So... Retrace your steps?"
"It's our only hope!"
Finding the ring, that was easy. Getting past Alice, however...
"You have to let me plan it!" Aunt Alice came blurring out the front door the moment we came into sight. "I've seen nearly everything!"
"Aside from the parts involving Jake or me," I said.
"Which is basically everything to do with a wedding for us." Jake finished, taking the words from my mouth. They started to walk inside
"Yeah, yeah, I know," Alice said, once through the door,"But I did see me designing your dress! It's beautiful!"
"You mean it might be beautiful," Mum said from the couch. She was basically bouncing up and down on the couch.
"So you've heard I take it?" I said, smiling.
"Oh yes," Mum said, "I've heard all!" she jumped up, and rushed me into a bone crushing hug.
"Bella," Jake said, prying her off me, "I know you love, Nessie, but if you keep hugging her I'll only have a crushed-soda-can version of her to marry." Mum took the hit- and instead wrapped herself around Jake.
This time, it was Daddy who pulled her off of us.
"You're damn lucky, you know?" Daddy said.
"Yes, I do know that." Jake Wrapped his arm around me. "I've known it for for awhile now, too."
Daddy looked at me now, proud, but worried. "You know what you're getting into, right?"
"Dad!" I said, and that got chuckles from everyone in the room. Aunt Rose turned around on the back of the couch to face me. "You're first weddings the most touching. It'll have to be big!"
"Huge!" Esme chimed in, coming down the stairs happily.
"Plu-ease let me plan it!" Alice whined.
"I'm planning it!" Rose shouted.
"No, me!"
"I have the most experience, after all of Rose's."
"Plu-ease let me plan it!" Alice began chanting. This continued as Emmett hid under the pillows on the couch, and Daddy began playing the theme song from Jeopardy! As Mum pinched her forehead and shook her head before turning up the T.V. Carlisle- technically Grandpa, but that was weird- came bursting from his study, and screamed for order.
"What is going on?"
Everyone, even the men in the room, answered in sync. "Nessie and Jake are getting married!"
"What?" a smile spread across his face. "You two are getting married!" He rushed at me, and spun me into a lift, my head narrowly missing the ceiling as I laughed at the chaos surrounding. Then, once my feet were on the ground, Carlisle charged Daddy with a 'Move over', and they burst into the wedding march from a Midsummer Night's Dream, duet version. All the while, Alice, Esme and Rose were still at it, Mum was watching T.V. Turned onto 'Say Yes To The Dress' – turned up waaaay too loud, and Emmett was still curled up under the pillows.
"Oh god." Jake said, and I agreed.
The noise got to the point that the kitchen god even stepped from his layer in the kitchen, fried egg clinging to his chef hat and maple syrup all over his apron. He was armed with a rolling pin and a pancake flipper.
"What on earth is going on?" Jasper said, looking as menacing as Betty Crocker can be. Jake and I burst into laughter, on seeing him.
"Everyone is either angry, scared, happy, worried, or simply crazed." Uncle Jasper said this mainly to himself, then continued sternly. "What is going on?" everyone's eyes and ears shot up.
There was sweet silence for a moment. Then, chaos consumed again. There were seven different answers, all mainly saying "Nessie and Jacob are getting married!" then everything went back to as it was before.
The wolves must've heard the wedding bit, an in a moment were also crowding the living room. Seth and Leah, Quil, and Embry all came out, Leah wheeling Billy and his broken leg.
"You're getting married?" the boys shouted through pancake filled mouths, and rushed at Jake. The ensuing head locks and promises of 'a wild bachelor party' perked up Emmett's ears, and they were off making secret plans. Billy had wheeled himself over to the piano, and now he, Carlisle and Daddy were singing 'I'm Getting Married In The Morning' at the top of their lungs, Edward completely taken over the piano, playing it extra exuberance. I turned to Jake, put my hand on his arm, and showed him us, on the porch, out of this chaos.
We went out, and he sat on the porch swing. I curled up into his chest. I could hear Emmett and the wolf pack singing in the distance, 'You Better Shop Around.' sooooo like them.
"One things for sure," Jake said, kissing my hair.
"Hhmmm?" I asked, dosing off.
"This is only the beginning to a legendary wedding."
I burst into laughter.
"No shit!" I said, smiling. We fell asleep out there, the rest of our families oblivious to our leaving.
