Lily: this story is dedicated to all the girls out there. i wrote this while on my period and listening to Jekyl and Hyde. expect lots of prettyful gothic morbidness. review. do you love it? hate it?
Someone To Talk To
Chapter One
Sakura sighed. They were finally stopping and near a hot spring no less. It may not have been a bathhouse with fluffy towels, squishy beds and thick blankets but it was better than nothing. After checking that no one was near, she shed her sweaty clothes and stepped into the spring. At least she could relax alone while Kakashi, Naruto and Sasuke bathed further down.
Sakura had been feeling wretched all day long. They had trained until they were bone tired, covered in sweat, scratches and bruises. The usual soreness from training was worsened by the fact that Sakura was currently on her period. Cramps caused her stomach to double up and she could have sworn that you could smell the stench of the blood that collected between her legs. She felt disgusting. She shouldn't be allowed to touch anything or anyone.
Dirty girl.
Bloody girl.
Sick girl.
Bad girl.
Sakura hissed slightly as the hot water touched her sensitive skin. She slowly lowered herself into the water, liking the tingle that spread across her tired muscles. Sakura sat for a moment when she felt a her stomach wrench and a familiar sticky sensation between her thighs.
Thick, sticky, rancid, black, blood was slipping along her scraped legs and tainting the water red.
Sakura gulped back tears. Blood didn't bother her. How could it? She was a ninja. But blood like this... when she had a cut, it was supposed to bleed, her body was hurt and it was showing her that it needed to be fixed. But for her normally faithful body to suddenly revolt and betray her like this, becoming something dirty and taboo, that was just too much.
Sakura felt so revolting. It was no wonder that people didn't want to be near her. Sasuke was as cold as always, Kakashi was just a distant face behind a mask, Ino hated her and Naruto was so wrapped up in having Hinata as a girlfriend that he hardly paid any attention to Sakura anymore. Sakura was alone. Lonely little cherry blossom. Lonely loser.
Naruto wasn't the dead last one, Sakura was.
Sasuke and Naruto were amazing fighters, their chakra nearly boundless. They progressed so quickly, learning technique after technique. They were human whirlwinds. And Sakura? Sakura was left in their dust, panting to keep up.
Dirty girl.
Bloody girl.
Sick girl.
Bad girl.
Stupid girl.
Lonely girl.
Loser girl.
You don't deserve anything. It's good that you're alone. You don't deserve friends. It's good that you bleed like this. It keeps people away from you. No one wants to be near you. Everyone hates you. They hate you. They hate you. They hate you. They hate you.
Sakura whimpered and pulled out her kunai from her clothes.
She dragged the cold blade across her flesh, feeling it slice through. She carved the words into her thighs. Stupid. Bad. Loser. This is your punishment for being the slow one, the one that holds people back. This pain is good for you. Maybe you'll learn.
Sakura stood up, watching with morbid fascination as the bloody water droplets rolled down her legs.
Blood didn't bother her.
Sakura tightly bound the cuts across her legs. She couldn't have her trivial pains slowing up her team mates tomorrow. She walked slowly back to the camp, composing herself along the way. She had to be happy, so as not to worry her team mates. Sakura pitched her tent as far away from the others as she could, that way she could cry herself to sleep without worrying about waking her team mates. Everything for them, nothing for her.
Kakashi sniffed the air beneath his mask. Sakura had just walked by, smelling heavily of blood. She had smelt that way all day, but Kakashi knew that. But this blood smelled different. Menstrual blood had a distinct stench heavy, rancid and oddly sweet. The blood that Kakashi smelled on Sakura was a mixture of rancid and crisper, fresh blood, the kind that ran through your veins.
What was wrong? Why hadn't Sakura mentioned anything? Was she hurt? Or was it something... else?
Kakashi waited until Sasuke and Naruto had gone to their tents before creeping silently to a tree that hung over Sakura's tent. He crouched on it and listened intently. He could hear the faint sounds of sobbing. The gut wrenching, animal sounding sobs of sheer sorrow.
