There was something different in the morning.

Ever after his mother became the Secretary of State, she started making work trips, she was gone more than before and sometimes it was off the books. He had learned to ignore the gnawing feeling every time she left – it was always fine and the feeling had faded. On this morning it was back and stronger than ever.

Jason saw the way his father was looking at his mother, he saw the sadness and fear in his eyes. His father was the rock, he was always proud of his mother, he was always smiling. Not this morning. Oddly enough his father was looking at his mother longingly, almost as if he was trying to breathe everything in. Like it might be the last he'll see of her…

It had been going on for weeks now – late nights at the office, hushed conversations with his father, late night calls to her former friends from the CIA, the CIA friends stopping by… He had noticed the worry in his parents. Something was wrong, he knew it, but his parents were doing the best the could to keep it normal.

And then came that morning. Madam Secretary was not happy, she didn't seem excited for this trip, she hid it well though. Jason could see the worry in Stevie's face, when his mother refused to say the location of her trip. Well, that could be nothing, but it felt like it was something. While most of the time he didn't pay overly much attention to his mother's work and in a way he didn't mind the oblivion his parents created – he was well aware that his parents shielded him and his sisters a lot. He didn't like it this time.

And then he felt the difference.

Yeah, his mother is often annoyingly – at least he had to pretend not to like it – affectious, but even so in that morning. The way she held her arms around him for much longer than she normally would. The strength of her arms felt like she didn't want to let go, like she was afraid that if she'd let go, then that would be it. The way she reprimanded him not to annoy his sister on her birthday sounded like don't annoy his sister too much in the future. It almost felt like she was saying goodbye, but he tried to ignore the feeling.

It was harder, when he saw the way she hugged Stevie – tight, strong and seemed like she was holding onto Stevie just like she held onto him. And then the same with Alison. He saw the worry in Stevie's face, he saw the worry in his father's eyes, he felt it inside of him. Something was not right. Of course she said that she loved them like she did almost every morning, he heard his sisters say it back, he felt himself murmuring it quietly, but he was sure his mother heard that.

As she left the kitchen she looked back. She never does that. She looked sad, almost as if she wanted to come back to the kitchen and hug all of them again, to say how much she loves them again. And then she was gone and it was like a regular morning with his mother gone first and then his dad dropping Alison off to school and Stevie going to work, Jason was still suspended. Except his father looked worried and when Alison questioned it, he just brushed it off as something at work. Yeah, right.

The morning felt different and it was bad different.

Jason didn't say a word about it.

It was Alison's birthday the next day and for the first time (to his knowledge), his mother was not there. He knew his mother was in CIA before, but he was too little to remember that time, so was Alison. But Stevie being the eldest remembered that. That's why he needed to talk with his sister, his oldest sister.

After dinner, when Jason was sure that his father was in the bedroom and Alison was not in the hearing range, he knocked at Stevie's room.

"Hey, Jace, what's up?" Stevie said and looked at him over her book.

"What are you reading?" he asked.

Stevie closed the book and showed Jason the cover. "Just some random crime novel," she replied.

Jason brushed off the answer he entered the room and closed the door behind him.

"You know where mom is?" he asked bluntly.

Stevie closed her book and shook her head.

"Do you think dad knows?" Jason asked.

"I think so, but even if he does, he won't tell us," Stevie replied. Yes, when she was younger and her mother was still in the CIA, she had asked her father a lot of times, but he never said anything. She wasn't entirely sure he knew her location.

"But you think she's okay?" he asked quietly.

Stevie jumped off her bed and discarded the book. She hugged Jason, something she didn't too as often.

"Yeah, Jace, I think mom's okay. She's the Secretary of State, she has her security guys protecting her. So, I think she's fine," Stevie said, but there was some hint of uncertainty in her voice, like she was trying to convince herself just the same. She released Jason, both of them sat down on her bed.

"Dad's worried," Jason said. "If he knows where mom is and he is worried then it's bad, right?"

Stevie smiled a little. "Dad's always been worried about mom," she said in an attempt to calm her brother, when in fact she was worried just the same.

"Not like this," Jason argued.

"He used to be," Stevie said.

"When mom was in CIA?" Jason asked.

They didn't talk much about her time at the CIA and Stevie was the only child, who could remember. Jason was barely out of diapers, when she quit and there were days, when he felt like he was part of the reason why she quit. It might have been all of them – Stevie, Alison and him.

Stevie nodded. "But it was different. She's no longer CIA operative, she's the Secretary of State. I know for a fact, that President wouldn't put her in danger," Stevie added. "They are friends, at least they used to be. He's been mom's boss for ages and Harrison overheard his dad talk about work. He always said, that his father would do anything to keep my mom away from danger. I've heard his father talk to dad and assure him, that he'd always keep mom safe."

"That's assuring," Jason commented.

"Don't worry, Jace, if it was serious dad would tell us. And if something was happening in the world, then it would be all around the news, but the world seems pretty good right now," Stevie continued.

"Yeah, the news is always accurate," Jason said sarcastically.

Stevie looked down. "Well, dad always got a call. If mom was away and something had happened, then they would call dad, he'd go to the office and he'd be told. He hasn't gotten that call," Stevie said seriously.

"Yet," Jason added.

Stevie repeated it.

"Look, it's Ali's birthday tomorrow, you should think about that," she tried to change the topic.

"And for the first time mom won't be here," Jason said, not convinced.

Stevie wrapped her hand around her little brother and tried to comfort him. Maybe Jason wasn't as oblivious as they thought?

"Mom's fine. She's tough, she's strong. She was CIA agent and a damn good one. She knows how to take care of herself and she has her security. She's trying to make the world a better place for us and I know for a fact that she's doing the best she could to get back to us," Stevie said with strong unfaltering voice. She believed every word she said and she knew that her mother would come back to them, she'd do anything to get back. Stevie vaguely saw her mother being broken down after few of the missions, she was fragile and shell of a woman Stevie knew, but she caught just the glimpses, because her parents tried to hide it the best they could. Stevie was the eldest, she remembered that, she saw that, but Jason did not need to know that.

Jason gave up. He stood from the bed. "I hope you're right," he said and left Stevie's room.

Stevie sighed heavily. Yeah, she was just as worried as Jason, as Alison and their father were. And she really hoped their mother was fine and with any luck she's gonna walk through the doors tomorrow with a smile on her face and hug them all again. She really hoped that would happen.

***MSec***

Ali's birthday morning was just as fun as he remembered and then everybody went back to work or to school.

And the afternoon was as cozy as ever – Stevie reading a book, Ali and their dad playing chess and Jason was on his tablet.

There it was - a coup in Iran.

His family seemed to take the news rather well, no sign that their mother could be there or could she be there? There was a slight change in his father – he was distracted, worried, maybe even scared. Testament to that was Ali nearly beating him in chess.

And then it came.

A phone call.

His father excused himself and said it was about work. Yeah, right. He was a teacher, he'd never have to run to work that urgently. Something had happened. He got the call just like Stevie said. And they were kept in the dark.

Stevie and Alison seemed to be oblivious to the coup, they seemed not to care, so Jason escaped to his room to read, to research, to worry, to panic.

He heard his sisters talk in hushed voices, but they have been doing it forever, probably it was something about the guys. Everything seemed normal. Maybe he was worried for nothing? Maybe his mother was in Switzerland having a tea party or in New York meeting ambassador of Bolivia? Maybe his mother was in Iran?

It was hours later, when he heard his dad return. He came down to see what was happening. If it was about mom, then his dad would tell him, right? They all looked serious, but they didn't say anything about their mother, he didn't ask. So, they had a laffy string fight and Jason really liked that. They were all smiling and laughing and happy. If something was wrong then they wouldn't be, right? Maybe there was some religion crisis in the university and his father was called there?

He brushed it off – his mother was okay, she was not in Iran. She was somewhere else, safe and sound and she'd be back in a few days with Swiss chocolate or something of the sorts. She was fine.

That night he fell asleep quickly. He heard his father check up on him, but he fell back asleep easily.

The morning after it was all joy at the kitchen.

"What happened?" Jason asked.

"Mom's coming back today," his father said and gave Jason some bacon.

See, everything was okay. His mother would be back and all would go back to normal.

True, it was hours later, when the motorcade arrived in front of the house.

"Mom's back," his father shouted from downstairs. Soon the front door opened and his mom walked in.

Jason saw how his mother almost fell into his father's open arms, just as much as his father almost pulled her in. He noticed the empty, cold look she had over his father's shoulder.

Alison and Stevie ran down and hugged her mother with bright smiles. And Jason joined in. He saw the smile on her mother's face, when his sisters released her and she turned to hug him. She was fine.

There was nothing to worry about.

Except they don't usually run to their mother, when she walked through the doors. Yeah, sure their father does, but not Stevie, Alison and him. They don't usually hug her like that when she gets home from work trips. They don't usually look relieved to have her home again. They don't usually look happy to see her alive again.

That was different as well.