DISCLAIMER: Do not own Legend of Korra or Deadpool.

A.N.: Yeah, I thought that having Teen Titans be Kamen Riders was weird enough, but nope. Now I gotta turn Korra in the Merc with the Mouth. Trust me, there are still even dumber crossover ideas out there, like turning Tails from Sonic into Optimus Prime… no really, that was a thing.

That said, this will basically be the awesome Deadpool movie, just substituting characters from Korra in place of those from the film. Also, I guess this is obvious, but this fic will be rated M, due to the sexual content, language, violence and 4th wall breaking.

Also, KORRASAMI!

With that said, please enjoy "Korrapool" (who, for the sake of the story, will just be referred to as Deadpool)!

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In the middle of the day, sitting in the back of a cab, Korra Wilson was… well, bored out of her fucking mind. She has been sitting quietly, in that seat, for well over 20 minutes, and had done jackshit. Oh sure, she picked up a brochure, had her hand out the window, picked some chewed up gum from the ceiling only to wipe it from your computer monitors. But outside of that, nothing. It was actually kind of lonely. Then again, she's surprised that she could get a cab at all, given her get-up.

Said get-up was a red and black spandex suit, complete with a belt that had half a dozen brown pouches and a mask that covered her head except for the brown pony tail coming out of the back of her head. Oh, did I also mention a pair of killer katanas on her back that, when wielded, can turn any unfortunate bastard that comes her way into a fucking kebab? Not to mention the holsters on her thighs that carried a pair of pistols. Yeah, she's amazed the cab even stopped to pick her up. Regardless, she felt that her situation needed to change and poked her head through the cabbie's window.

"Kinda lonesome back here."

With that, she tried to squeeze her ass through the small window. Needless to say, it wasn't easy. Like trying to squeeze out a turd that you've been holding in all day but has suddenly dried up… weird analogy, but it fits, so to speak.

"Little help here?"

"Ma'am, I have to keep my hands on the wheel."

"Excuse me."

After a few more grunts, squeezes and a quick shot of her crotch, she was finally able to relax in the shotgun seat next to the driver. I guess the driver was okay with crazy people in spandex in his cab, as they got to talking.

"Kai."

"Pool. Dead."

Of course, now that she's in the front, Korra notices a picture of a girl in the front next to the Daffodil Daydream air freshener. Said girl had short brunette hair and a weird blue arrow tattoo on her forehead.

"Mmm. Nice."

"Smells good, no?"

"Not the Daffodil Daydream. The girl."

"Ah, yes. Jinora. She would have made me a very agreeable wife, but, um… Jinora's heart has been stolen by this prick called Tahno. He is as dishonourable as he is attractive."

After that, Korra spent a few seconds in silence, thinking. Granted most of her thoughts were typically occupied by Chimichangas, gunplay and nude images of Rosario Dawson, but this time, she was thinking of what the boy just told her… and what little relevance it had to the story, but nevertheless.

"Kai, I'm starting to think there's a reason I'm in this cab today."

"Yes, you called for it, remember?"

"No, my slender, brown friend. Love… is a beautiful thing. When you find it, the whole world tastes like Daffodil Daydream."

"Mmm."

And so, Korra held out her right pinkie, Kai reciprocating and she held his tight enough almost to break it.

"So, you gotta hold on to love. Tight! And never let go. Don't make the same mistakes I did, okay?"

"Yes."

With that, the two let go of their pinkies. But of course, as this is basically Deadpool with Korra, she wasn't done talking.

"Or else the whole world will taste like Mama June after some hot Yoga."

"And what does Mama June taste like?"

"Like two hobos fucking in a shoe filled with piss."

"Okay, stop!"

"I can go all day Kai, the point is; it's bad!"

"…It's bad."

After that, there was nothing but silence in the cab. It may have last a few seconds, but it felt like a long few seconds. Especially since what Korra said left an unpleasant image in Kai's head. So, to get that image out of his head, he tried to talk about something else.

"Uh, why the fancy red suit, Ms. Pool?"

"Oh, that's because it's Christmas Day, Kai, and I'm after someone on my NAUGHTY list! I've been waiting; 1 year, 3 weeks, 6 days and oh (checks Steven Universe watch) 14 minutes to make him fix what he did to me!"

"And what did he do to you, exactly?"

"THIS shit!"

With that, she moved the bottom of her mask to her forehead, revealing a horribly scarred, utterly fucked up face, with her blue eyes standing out. I know this is a joke lately used in the film, and subsequently this FanFic, but she really looked like Freddy Krueger face-fucked the geographical map of Utah.

"Boo!"

Kai could of swore he felt a bit of a wetness in his boxers. And not in the good way, either.

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Meanwhile, just outside the city, a bald man wearing a black leather jacket was sitting on a crate of weapons, eating an apple, as a "Unalaq Industries" helicopter descended on to the ground, an Inuit man stepping out in a mostly dark blue suit. Both sides had they own flunkies on their sides, though they weren't here to fight. The bald man, Zaheer, walked over calmly to Unalaq.

"They won't disappoint."

"They better not. What about next month's shipment?"

"There won't be one."

Obviously, for a man as vicious and obviously one-dimensional as Unalaq, this wasn't a good thing. Though Zaheer had more to say.

"You're not the only one with a war to win."

"That won't do."

"See, we've had this… small disruption to our supply chain."

Without warning, Zaheer grabbed Tarrlok by the neck and raised him in the air, not even concerned about Unalaq's thugs who pointed their weapons at him and demanded that Unalaq be put down. Instead, he continued talking as if nothing happened.

"We'd appreciate your patience."

Well, not like Unalaq had a choice right now. Either does as Zaheer asks or go out like Clayton from Tarzan.

"Okay!"

Well, this pleased Zaheer, as he then put Unalaq back down.

"We'll deliver in full the next month. Pleasure doing business with you."

He walks away to his convey, hearing Unalaq mutter under his breath.

"Fucking mutant."

I'm glad he never made it past Season 2.

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Back in the cab, Korra started feeling herself up. No, not like that! It was only most of the way to where she needed to be, as well as looking in the back seat, that she realised something.

"Ah, SHIT! I forgot my ammo bag!"

"Should we turn back?"

"Nope, no time! Fuck it. I got this. Nine, ten, eleven, twelve bullets, or bust. We're here!"

With that, Kai quickly stopped the cab. Korra was about to get out, but there was one thing stopping her.

"That's uh, $27.50."

"Oh, I never carry a wallet while I'm working. Ruins the lines of the suit."

"Oh."

Well, she ain't lying.

"But, uh, how 'bout a crisp high five?"

"Okay."

They do so, Korra then getting of the cab and giving her farewell greeting.

"Merry Christmas."

"And a convivial Tuesday in April to you too, Ms. Pool!"

If you think the madness is over with, then you clearly haven't seen the movie, because we have only just begun!

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This is what happens when I have nothing to do and it's almost 3 at night.

Hope you've enjoyed and please review and share with your friends!