Drama on the Mount

Chapter 1

Hera's Strike

Hera stood alone in the white marble and gold halls of Olympus, poised

for a confrontation with her no-good husband, this was the fifth decade

he'd missed her birthday dinner and she was pissed. Just because he was

the ruler of Olympus didn't give him the right to go traipsing around

with every Pandora, Cyane and Megara that came his way.

Just then, Zeus walked in, interrupting Hera's festering thoughts of

resentment for the moment. "Hi honey, I'm home " said the King of the

Gods, blissful and ignorant. "My you look beautiful today, wife." added

Zeus, knowing something was wrong from the look on Hera's face, but not

quite sure what it was. Hera simply stood there unmoved, raised an

eyebrow incredulously and proceeded to flip her long, thick black locks

back with a gold-adorned hand before asking, "Where were you, Zeus?"in a

tone befitting her title as Queen of Olympus.

"Oh no, not this again," Zeus quietly whispered under his breath as he

tried to nonchalantly change the subject, "Hey I'm kinda hungry

babe...wanna make me a sandwich?"

Hera's regal grey eyes twitched as she responded, "No...I do not want to

make you a sandwich...babe. I want to know where you were. It was my

birthday yesterday and as usual you missed dinner with the family

despite the fact that I explicitly asked you not to."

"Is that what you're so pissy about? Jeez Hera, we're immortal," as Zeus

said this he laughed a little at how serious she was making this whole

thing, "What's one birthday?"

"It's not just one birthday, Zeus. It's you never being there as my

husband, never being there as the children's father, it's you lying in

filth with anything that moves...and sometimes even with things that

don't " admonished Hera, now livid at his blasé attitude.

Zeus had a goofy smirk plastered on his face as he thought about the

latest time he'd lain in filth... yesterday.

"Are you listening to me? " Hera's voice echoed and made the ground

shake a little.

"Ow...keep it down dear, I hear you," Zeus responded, "I don't want to,

but I do." he mumbled under his breath.

Unfortunately, Hera had heard this last part, she was of course a

Goddess and as such had excellent hearing.

"WHAT? Oh that's right, turn this around into a joke...that's all this

is to you, isn't it?" Hera asked, fully aware of the answer.

"So dear...how are the kids?" Zeus again tried to change the subject, as

he walked towards the kitchen.

Hera saw now that he wouldn't listen to words, so she closed her eyes

and summoned a powerful gust of wind which sent Zeus flying backwards

onto the ground, his head lying on the marble floor right next to Hera's

golden high-heeled sandals.

She knelt down and looked Zeus in the eyes, then said, "You can't get

away from me that easily dear. Do you really want to know how the

children are? Fine. I'll tell you. Ares is bullying Hermes who's still a

chronic bed-wetter, Athena's anti-social, Aphrodite's got crabs,

Hephaestus is still playing with fire, Hekate's cutting herself again,

Apollo and Artemis are both gay and Dionysus won't stay in rehab for

longer than a day."

"The twins are gay? Really?" Zeus, still on the floor, asked incredulously.

"Zeus...you're missing the point here entirely. I'm sick of supporting

this family by myself without your help...so I'm going on strike."

"Uh...strike?" asked Zeus, as if he didn't know what she meant.

"Yes, Zeus, a strike. I'm going to stay with my sister Demeter, Goddess

of the Harvest, she's in town for the 'Goodness Gracious Great Gourds of

Fire Festival' in Thrace. And I'm telling you right now Zeus, I'm not

coming back until you straighten up your act "

With this, Hera turned, her purple silk robe flowing behind her like a

wave as she went out to the terrace and boarded her gold chariot.

Zeus got up and could hear Iris her driver ask, "Ready Ms. Hera?"

"Yes, Iris," responded Hera.

Zeus attempted to get a glimpse of her through the window, but she

looked away as Iris whipped the peacocks pulling the chariot into action

and they flew away into the clouds.

He couldn't believe it, she was actually going through with this. In all

the millennia that they'd been married, Hera had threatened to walk out

on him literally thousands of times, but she'd never actually gone

through with it. Usually his humor and goofy smile were enough to charm

her into staying and forgetting about whatever nasty mess Zeus had

gotten himself into. But not this time.