I never think of my brother. His absence haunts me through the dull, boring halls of our house. Our house is like everybody's else in Abnegation; we are forbidden to hand personal decorations because having a unique home is selfish. I don't even remember what my brother looks like. My father, Marcus, never mentions his name, so I don't know what it is. Every time I ask him about it, he either changes the subject or just says 'his absence is too painful to talk about'. Was it really that bad?
My father assumes that I'll be the child that stays. I know because I overheard him earlier saying to some people called Natalie and Andrew Prior: "I know she'll stay, she's always selfless. Alexia wouldn't do that to me. Alexia Grace Eaton is my last child and she knows it" The man, Andrew, replied with this: "I know you believe that, but look at what i thought about Beatrice and Caleb." The conversation continued but i got really bored so i went for a walk around the compound; it gave me time to clear my head. Who the hell were Beatrice and Caleb? Were they former Abnegation members like my brother? Guess I'll never know. Marcus wasn't ugly, but he wasn't the most handsome man you've ever met. He had gray, short hair, green and grey eyes. I liked the Abnegation compound. Barely anyone has cars so the air is really clean, the grass is always a perfect shade of green and everyone likes to just sit out in the sun and talk. Although sometimes I don't like the compound. All the buildings are the same, none of the kids are allowed to play or run around and all streets look the same so it takes you years to learn where your own house is.
Children, in long, gray slacks, sat on the grass talking about the weather and how each others' day had been. they were so lucky; they don't have to deal with all this insanity for at least seven more years. I have to wait two hours, and then I'll be gone. Out of this boring hell hole for good and i'll never come back. I don't care if I have to put up with impure air, I just don't care anymore.
Looking at my watch (the only jewellery we're allowed because it's practical) I realise that the bus will come by soon and I really need to get ready for the choosing ceremony. My tests the other day told me I was Erudite. What the hell? I hate learning about things. I actually fell asleep in my History of The Factions class, I woke up to a teacher yelling at me. Either way, I know what I'm going to pick: Candor. I'll always be honest when I can, just never around my father. He would whip me with his belt if I hurt anyone's feelings even a little bit. He says that being honest is being selfish. How that is true, I have no idea. Either way, I don't want to get whipped. I remember the aptitude test from yesterday so clearly. Me and about four other people all walked into different rooms. They would've been met by Abnegation members that have been so selfless and given up their time to perform these tests. I however, was met by a Dauntless tattooed freak (We can't be tested by our own faction members). She had dreadlocks like Bob Marley and her skin was more ink than flesh. "You have done this before, right?" I asked as I sat down in a chair that looked much like a dentists' chair. "Oh yes, for quite a few years now." She replied. She continued talking for quite a long while after that and I pretended to listen. Every so often, I'd add an "yeah" or a "ohhhh". Finally, she stopped talking and injected me with the serum. After that, all went black and I can't remember anything, even now. The serum erases all memories of what we saw and replaces them with patches of black, darkness.
As I turned the corner on to Yoxall Avenue (the road i live on), I heard screams of pain. I picked up the pace and started to jog round the corner. Before me I saw what looked like an eleven year old boy, with his leg twisted in an awkward position whilst his mother stood over him saying something to him. She had auburn hair that shimmered in the sun, but apart from that she was exactly the same as everyone else. Same shirt and the same long, grey slacks. I edged closer so that I could hear what the woman was saying, "Don't be so selfish! How dare you bring all this attention to yourself. I expected you to be better than this." She practically spat on him whilst he was in pain. I couldn't stand up for this. I wouldn't.
"Hey! Hey!" The woman turned and glared at me. Boi, if looks could kill! Up close, the woman wasn't as pretty as she seemed; she was older too. She had plain brown eyes with a nose that flicked at the end and a small scar curving down from the edge of her mouth.
"Yes?" She replied with a slightly lower pitch than most woman.
"You can't treat him like that, he's just a little kid! He doesn't underst-" I shouted
"He should respect our Faction." She replied in a low tone, cutting me off. "Shouldn't you be getting ready anyway?"
Oh God, I had six minutes before the bus would arrive. Damn it! That means after taking four minutes to get home and and explain to my father why I've been gone for ages, I only have two minutes to do my hair. My mother used to do it, but she died after having surgery, so I'm told. Running down the street, I turn quite a few heads but no one stops me. Normally, the Abnegation frown on creating such an attraction as they think that drawing attention to one person is selfish. Thank god that will be over soon.
Slamming through the wooden, front door, I run straight upstairs leaving my fathers' question lingering in the air. I bolt into the bathroom desperately trying to seize the hair brush and some bobby pins to tie my hair into a knot. Where was it? Aha!
"Alexia!" Marcus shouted up the stairs. "Alexia Eaton get down here! The bus is here!"
Damn it! Damn it! Damn it! I'll have to do my hair on the bumpy bus. Stumbling, I ran down the stairs.
"Are you going to answer my question from earlier?" Marcus asked.
"I went for a walk and then helped out this kid." It was kind of true at least.
"That's my girl, always being selfless" Proudness stood out pretty well in that sentence.
Guilt overwhelmed me. Why are you feeling guilty? This is an man who has beaten you many times. Get a grip girl! You're Alexia Eaton, you can do anything!
"Where is Megan? I assumed that she would be riding with us today." Marcus asked. Megan was my best friend and had been since i can remember. Her sister left abnegation two years ago to join Dauntless; Megan can't remember what she looks either because Megan was in a car crash a few months ago and forgot nearly everything. Megan has a car because her father, Andrew, has to drive to the Erudite compound and back everyday since he is a member of the Governing Council.
"Megan and her family went to set up the chairs, remember." I tried to sound polite but harshness edged my voice. If he noticed, he didn't mention it. We stood outside the house, waiting for the bus to come. This is the only time a bus comes down our road. I hope it will be late; it will give me more time to get my hair looking neater. The bus finally turned the corner, a little too late really.
After finally finding a seat on a bus filled with Abnegation and Amity (our compounds were right next to each other), I collapsed in it and closed my eyes. I didn't realise that I had drifted off until I heard Marcus ordering me to give up my seat to an Amity. Still half asleep, I stood up, giving the Amity person, who at least said thank you, my seat on the bus. When I stood up, Marcus, very subtly, slapped my back, as if to look like a pat, and whispered in my ear, "That's what you get when you embarrass me."
I stood for the rest of the trip, even though there were seats available, just incase I dozed off again and got another slap.
About fifteen minutes after we got on the bus, we came to a halt outside a massive building. It was quite plain but also quite creative, to me anyway. I suppose this is just a normal building to nearly everyone else. My father and I let everyone else off of the bus before us because we are selfless. Surrounding me were lots of tall, angled buildings in different shapes, painted different colours. However, there was one building that stood out the most. It had all the faction symbols on it: hands for Abnegation, a tree for Amity, scales for Candor, an eye for Erudite and flames for Dauntless. Soon, the scales will belong to me. Or shall I choose the flames? I can either choose what I really want or I can choose what I believe I will succeed the most in. In Candor, I'll be doing what I'm best at but in Dauntless, I'll be doing the thing I want to. I still have some time to think. Not long though.
Sixteen year olds from every faction gather at the entrance to the main building, inline with their faction symbol. Every faction arrives in a different way; Abnegation and Amity arrive by bus, Erudite arrive by vehicles they have designed, Candor arrive by walking because the building is in their compound and the Dauntless arrive by jumping off a train. "Attention! Attention!" called a middle aged woman, "You will now enter the building in alphabetical order." She started reading out name, after name, after name, and I had completely switched off until I heard "Alexia Eaton" which to my distaste, cause quite a commotion.
The unique building was even bigger and better inside. It had a massive arch filled with seats but separated into five different sections; one for each faction. Abnegation were on the far left, then so on in alphabetical order. Searching the crowd, I saw Marcus sitting there with a smile that reaches his eyes, something I haven't seen in at least six years, mouthing something along the lines of: "I'll see you at home". Instead of feeling guilty for my actions, I simply mouth this back to him: "Faction before blood". Shock and confusion flood his face, as the speech made by someone called Jeanine comes to a close and the first sixteen year old, an Amity boy, takes a knife off her, we properly start the ceremony. The first candidate to change factions is an Erudite girl who switched to Candor. This caused a little bit of murmurs but they had all died down by the time the next candidate came up. About five minutes later, I heard "Alexia Grace Eaton". Stumbling, I made my way to the bowls, giggles arose from behind me as I nearly face-planted into the floor. The bowls were all lined up in a loose semi-circle around me. Each bowl faced where that faction was sitting. It was annoying because you had to look at the other factions as you chose a different one. With a knife in my hand, I felt powerful, I felt strong, I felt Dauntless. With the blade pressed into my hand, I quickly flicked my wrist back and a sharp stinging sensation arose on my hand. The Candor and Dauntless bowls were next to each other. I only had a short time to make my decision. I stuck my hand out between them. Oh screw it, I hate wearing white, I thought and I jerked my hand to the right. That's when chaos broke out.
"She's like Tobias!" many people shouted, "She's followed in his footsteps!"
Tobias? Who was that? Was that my brother? Following in his footsteps, did my brother transfer to Dauntless too? Will I see him there? WIll I ever see him?
"Quiet, quiet, quiet!" Jeanine shouted into a microphone. After a few more minutes of insanity, everyone seemed to quieten down. Everybody but the Dauntless were involved in that cat fight; they just sat there and looked smug. As I walked off towards my future faction, I couldn't help but glance at Marcus out of the corner of my eye and the moment I did, I regretted it. Pain and anger engulfed his face and he glared at me with complete hatred. Natalie Prior stood next to him and comforted him by patting his arm whilst giving me a friendly smile.
Standing behind the Dauntless felt like home. It felt like I had finally found where I belong. The rest of the ceremony went in a blurr. I was switched off for most of it, thinking of Tobias. The only bit that stood out was Megan making her decision: Dauntless. She looked up at me and smiled whilst making her way towards me. This also caused a little bit of commotion but not nearly enough compared to me. People whispered this time as well but they whispered this: She's like Beatrice! Was that Megan's sister? I had to find out.
When Jeanine gave the last speech about seeing everyone next year, the Dauntless erupted into cheers and yells and started running out of the hall. I kept up with everyone pretty well; I've always been naturally fast. I might not be the strongest or the bravest of the initiates but I was definitely one of the fastest. I'm really glad I watched the Dauntless jumping on and off trains when I was younger. So when someone shouted "We're jumping on!" I knew what to do. Run five feet, throw out left hand, grab handle, swing legs round and pull self in. It was quite an easy process, once you knew the ropes. After getting in myself, I crouched by the door to the car and helped pull in other initiates. Two initiates were too slow to make it. They just failed the first test. They're factionless now.
Once everyone was in, I went and sat at the back of the car next to one Candor, one Erudite and Megan
"Hi, I'm Natasha but you can call me Tasha. You're the Alexia Eaton right? You caused quite a commotion back there in the hall! I'm sorry, I'm Candor, am I being rude? I'm so used to telling the truth all the time." She explained, she seemed pretty nice, a little hyper, definitely a Candor though.
"Umm, yeah hi, you can call me Lexi and don't worry about being honest, i'd just watch it in front of our leaders" I replied. Tasha was pretty, she had straight, long, blonde hair with streaks of pink in it. She had deep brown eyes and a thin nose.
"Oh hey Alexia, I am so glad me and you chose the same faction! I was scared everyone here would hate me but now I have you! " said Megan. She too was pretty. She had curly, light, brown hair and freckles on her pale face to match the emerald blue eyes she had. The last girl was Olivia. She was lost in her own little world of knowledge so Tasha told me all about her instead because apparently they were best friends growing up and knew everything about each other. Olivia's really pretty too. She had slightly frizzy, brown hair that came down to her shoulders and she also had dark brown eyes.
I sat there for a while wondering about what Dauntless Initiation was going to be like. I was interrupted from my daze when someone shouted "They're jumping off" Jumping off? On to what? As we came closer, the answer became clearer: a roof. Simple. Tasha was squealing at Megan something about jumping together. The train started to slow down a little bit, but it was still moving pretty fast. Closer, closer, closer. Jump! Flying through the air, I felt adrenaline pumping through my veins. I was made to be brave. I was made to be Dauntless.
I landed on my feet on the roof whilst Megan, Tasha and Olivia seemed to be tumbling all over the place. Not the best way to start. We went to join the rest of the group after brushing ourselves off and found ourselves standing at the edge of the roof looking into a big, black hole.
"This is your first test," called out one of the leaders, I think his name is Eric (he said it earlier but I wasn't listening) "If you can jump down, you can proceed. Any questions?"
"Is there a net at the bottom or water or something like that?" asked an initiate curiously.
"You'll have to wait and see," replied Eric, "So, who's going first?" An awkward silence hung in the atmosphere. No one wants to be the first to jump, it would just be embarrassing. What's more embarrassing though, is when your friends (I guess) step back in unison and push you forward so you look like a volunteer.
"Well isn't history repeating itself! I see we have a volunteer. What's your name Stiff?" asked Eric with a hint of mock in his voice.
"Lexi." I whispered
"What was that, Stiff?" asked Eric.
"Lexi." I replied, louder this time.
"Well good luck then." I swear there was a hint of sarcasm in that voice. Standing on the edge of the roof, reality started to set in. This is really happening, I'm actually going to jump off a roof and on to what exactly, I had no idea. Howling, the wind rushed past me, knocking me off balance. Carefully, I regained my balance. Calm down. Jump in three...two...
"That's long enough."Said Eric as he pushed me off the roof. I tried to scream but nothing come out. I felt like I was falling for hours. As I looked up, I saw Eric smirking at me. God, I hated him. Finally, my back hit something hard, but it wasn't the concrete I half expected. No, it was a net. It wrapped around me like a cocoon. Two pairs of hands grabbed out to reach me. I grabbed the closest pair which belonged to a woman just a couple of years older than me. She's really pretty; she has golden, long hair with brown eyes, lots of muscle and a tattoo down her collarbone of three crows. The other pair of hands belonged to a man about two years older than the woman. He was insanely handsome. He had loads of muscle, a tattoo peeking out from underneath the neck of his shirt, short, brown hair and deep brown hair. They both wore black fighting clothes that fit them quite tightly.
"Looks like history is repeating itself! Huh, Six?" asked the man.
"Guess it is, Four." replied the woman.
"Why does everyone keep saying that? What do you mean history is repeating itself?" I asked curiously.
"Wow a curious Stiff, she really is a mini you, Six. Oh, I'm Four by the way and we're two of your instructors." said Four.
"You guys have numbers as your names?" I asked with a hint of sarcasm in my voice.
"Well you're a bit rude aren't you? Where'd you get that from, huh?" questioned Six.
"My brother. By the way, I'm Lexi and I'm not a Stiff, I'm Dauntless." I replied.
"We'll see about that." Jeez, he was a bit rude, "First jumper, Lexi." shouted up Four, to Eric, I think. Six lead me off to the side, away from the net and against a wall. Four and Six got ready to catch the next initiate to fall into the net. I looked around to try and see where I was, but there was very little light in this whole. Off to the right, I saw a narrow hallway that lead to some unknown place. Screams echoed as the last faller, Tasha hit the net.
Once we were all standing on solid ground, Four and Six announced themselves and that they were going to be out instructors for this process. After that, they lead us down the narrow corridor that only had light at certain intervals, so when it was completely dark, I was sure I was lost until I felt Olivia and Megan's arms link with mine. The gesture was unusual to me but they seemed pretty used to it, so i went along with it.
Everyone came to an abrupt halt as Six said, "This is where we split up. The boys will go with Four and the girls will go with me. We've changed the initiation process to make it fairer and give everyone a chance at making it into the top ten." explained Six.
"Wait, some of us will get cut?" said Tasha with anxiety rising in her throat.
"You chose us, now we have to choose you." said Four, he actually sounded bored, as if he's said it billions of other times. After he said that, everyone shut up. We were all to shocked to say anything.
Four led the boys off to the left and Six led us straight on. Where the tunnel ended, there was a massive open space. The only word to describe it was to call it a pit. However, the peace was disrupted by the sound of crashing water going at insane speeds. Six lead us closer and closer to the rushing water. I expected it to be a river but it was more of a chasm than anything.
"This is something my leader said to me when I first arrived here: 'There is a fine line between bravery and idiocy.' And believe me that line is like freshly frozen ice: thin as hell. If anyone tries to pull off a brave stunt by jumping in here, your life will be over in seconds. I've seen it happen; it happened to one of my friends when I was an initiate. His name was Al. Some people say his death was brave but it was stupid, hence the thin line." explained Six. As soon as she mentioned her friend and his death, her face was flooded with loads of emotions, like a kaleidoscope of memories: pain, sorrow, disbelief, I even think I saw a flash of anger. She led us away from the chasm after that and led us down yet another long, narrow hallway (how do people not get lost here?) but this one had lighting all the way down it, so I could actually see the end of it. This hallway was unlike the others; it had intervals every now and then that lead off to different rooms. THe room Six lead us to was the fifth room down and instead of blue lights, it had orange flames.
"This is where you'll be sleeping for the next couple of weeks so make yourselves comfortable and if you have any questions, just ask the Dauntless-born initiates, they'll know the answer. Don't forget, dinner's at seven in the dining room. Have fun! Oh and by the way, the boys will get here soon so I would try and get the best beds whilst you can. Bye!" Six waved goodbye and left, probably to go and find Four, you can so tell that they're going out.
"Hey Meg, do you want to share a bunk?" I asked. No way was I going to share it with some stranger!
"Yeah sure, bagsy bottom bunk!" That chick had way too much enthusiasm in her voice, all it is, is a bed.
"Cool, I wanted the top anyway." I replied in a bored tone. Tasha and Olivia were still arguing over who was going on the bottom because they both wanted the top. Tasha almost killed me when I suggested that they just sleep in different beds. "WHAT? No way am I sharing it with a stranger, plus it would have to be a boy because all the other girls are taken!" She had said, I thought that she might actually bite my head off. There wasn't much settling in to do when you had no items to store anywhere, so instead, we sat down and learnt things about everyone. There were six girls that were transfers so in total, there were twelve girls in total. The six transfers were: Me, Megan, Olivia, Tasha, Brooke and Shannon. Brooke was really pretty too, she could even make the boring black-and-white of Candor look good (and that was pretty hard!) She had long ginger hair, freckles on her face and green brown eyes. Shannon was pretty, just not as much, she had wavy, blonde hair just below her shoulders. Compared to everyone else, I felt ugly. I was tall and lanky with a long nose. My brother once said I had nice eyes though, so that's something. My hair is wavy and flicks out at the ends, that's why I always wear it up.
We sat there for a while chatting until we heard thuds and loud voices coming from the hall. Me and Olivia ran to the door and flung it open. It was just the boys, but why were they so loud? They were running towards us, covered in mud and slipping all over the place. I ran away from the door this time, dragging Olivia with me so that we don't get trampled by them. We ran and sat on beds a split second before the boys smashed through the door laughing so loud, it shook the floor. What I saw next was not what I expected. Four came in smothered head to toe in mud, laughing louder than anyone else.
"What the hell did you guys do?" shouted Megan, "Just so that you know, I am not cleaning this up!" Muddy water was all over the floor in puddles. I bet I'll end up cleaning this, someone has to afterall.
"I showed the boys what it's really like to be in Dauntless, so I made them do BMF," he wasn't going to elaborate but our confused expressions probably made him, "BMF is British Military Fitness, you do lots of difficult challenges like running through a lake, which is what we did today." I still didn't understand half of that and gathered by friends' faces, they didn't either. All I know is that they ran through a lake, that seemed like the most important piece of information Four gave us. Maybe my first impression of him was wrong; sometimes he seemed nice, others he seemed horrible. I'll figure it out later.
All the boys were having showers and Four walked away muttering some excuse about needing to talk to Six, so I went and fetched a mop from the janitorial closet. The janitorial closet was two hallways down from our room. It was close to all the instructors' rooms. I started to head back after fetching the mop when I heard voices.
"What's your big obsession about that Stiff?" asked a woman, it sounded like Six. Stiff, were they talking about me or Megan?
"She's different, okay. There's something different about her. She reminds me of you but…but… also of myself." explained a man. Four; you could tell by the roughness in his voice. I stayed close to the walls, trying to blend in so I won't be caught. There's no curfew in Dauntless, so I wouldn't be punished for that, but I would be punished for eavesdropping on a private conversation. They slowly started moving towards my direction and as they did, I started to move further back. Snap. As I moved backwards, keeping my eyes on them, I stepped on a twig and evidently snapped it. In unison, their heads snapped up and they started approaching me much quicker than before. Run, I told myself. It's the only option left. Turning, I ran as fast as I could back to the dorm. Thank god it was night, otherwise they would've been able to tell it was me in a split second, but the night kept my identity a secret. I could feel them running after me. I could feel their heavy breaths as we ran faster and faster. I couldn't run to the dorms; that would be too obvious plus it's a dead end. So I just kept running. I didn't know where I was going, how I'd lose Four and Six, how I'd get back or how I wouldn't get in trouble. There's lots of corners in the Dauntless compound so it's easy to lose people, and that would be the same case for me but the corners also slow you down and with them right on my tail, it would be impossible to lose them. After running down what felt like a billion corridors, I found myself running into the pit. Because of my speed and my ability to run long distance, I put a bit more of a distance between us. In the corner of my eye, I saw a small little corridor, barely lit at all. Bingo! The distance seemed to get bigger and bigger as I got closer and closer. Eventually, I got to the entrance. The corridor sloped down, going further and further into the earth. I ran down it., Once again, I heard the rushing water of the chasm. Oh, no, it's a dead end at the end of this corridor and Six and Four are coming. Just keep running, I told myself. A few seconds later, I found myself standing still, facing a big wall of rock with the chasm racing next to me. Over the roar of the chasm, I could just about hear a voice saying this, "Now, now, what do we have here?" That voice wasn't Four's, that voice wasn't Six's, it was Eric's. I am standing next to a chasm with Eric standing behind me. Oh crap.
