A SYMBOL OF OUR FUTURE

Disclaimer - I don't own the rights, Zorro Production Inc does - I just like to play with the characters.

Plot - Both Victoria and Zorro question the rash marriage proposal. Was it a mistake?

This started as a one shot for Victoria but then Zorro wanted his own chapter and then I had to do a third one to finish up.


Chapter 1

It was three days after Zorro had proposed marriage to her when the euphoria of the unexpected engagement had all but died down to a low throb of joy in her heart and it was now that the doubts began to creep into her mind; doubts not over her love for him, for she knew that her love for the masked man was strong but her doubts were over the entire situation that they had found themselves in. Doubts that she had done the right thing, doubts that he truly loved her, no matter what he told her, no matter that he gave her his mother's ring and she now felt such an unease that she began to question his motives as well as her own in accepting his offer of marriage when she had no idea of who he really was.

It had been all too sudden, too unexpected and considering that she had been under the influence of that horrible tasting cactus tea at the time, the proposal was all too hazy to her; almost like a dream. And yet as she gazed down at the ring in her hand, the reality was true; he HAD asked her to marry him and she HAD accepted his proposal by taking his token of love; a symbol of their future, as he called his mother's ring.

She knew the reason for her doubts was due to one thing and one thing only; he had not removed his mask. To her mind that meant that he didn't trust her enough to share his life, to share his secret and that made her doubt his love for her; a love that may never come to pass for how could they ever marry if he never removed his mask. He had, on a number of occasions, told her that he would only unmask once the injustice of their Alcalde had stopped but there was no guarantee that de Soto would ever change or if he did, how long would it take; months, years, ten more years? And then where would be they? She feared that she would be too old to have children by the time he was able to unmask and she so desperately wanted children.

What she fully didn't understand was his fear that she didn't love him, that she only loved the hero and those words kept going around and around in her mind until she ended up with a headache. She needed to speak with someone about it, someone who wouldn't judge her but would help her to understand or at least try to understand, not just Zorro's fears but the whole mess they were in.

Which was why she was currently sitting on the third row bench in the mission chapel; she was hoping to make sense of everything.

Padre Benitez entered the chapel from the side door and was surprised to see Senorita Escalante sitting forlornly on a bench; it wasn't often that he saw her in the mission. "Senorita Escalante," he said as made his way over to her, "Is everything alright, my child?"

At hearing the Padre's voice, Victoria immediately clinched her hand around the ring and silently cursed herself for bringing it with her. She looked up at just as he sat down beside her, "I don't know what to do, padre." she replied.

"Can you tell me what is troubling you?" he asked as he settled comfortably on the bench.

She sighed as she lowered her gaze, "You know of my wish to have a family of my own," she paused as the padre nodded, "Well, that wish is coming closer but at the same time it's further away than ever."

Padre Benitez cocked his head to one side, "Has something happened between you and Zorro?" he asked.

She nodded, "Zorro asked me to marry him and I accepted but..." she stopped as tightened her hand around the ring to reassure her that his proposal wasn't a dream.

He was surprised by the marriage proposal; he hadn't realised that their relationship had gone that far and he hoped that Zorro had not brought dishonour upon the Senorita, "You accepted but what Senorita?" he urged her.

"Oh padre, he still refuses to unmask to me." she all but sobbed.

Father Benitez sat up straight, "Are you telling me, my child, that when Zorro asked you to marry, he didn't remove his mask?" he asked with a frown on his face. He would definitely have to have a talk with that man about his behaviour, he thought to himself.

She nodded, "I tried urge him to tell me who he was but he wouldn't."

"And yet you still accepted his offer?" he said worriedly; what a mess these two were causing to each other.

"I know how it sounds, padre, but I love him and he loves me." she replied to his unasked question.

"But not enough to remove his mask, it seems," he said as he took a deep breath. "Did he say why he would not do this for you?"

She nodded as she twisted the material of her skirts with her free hand, "He said...he said that he is afraid...of me. Afraid that I only love the hero and that if he removed his mask that I would still love Zorro and not the man." she replied as she turned to face the older man. "I tried to tell him that I love him, that the courage he has as Zorro is also his. He was going to remove his mask but then he changed his mind. Oh padre, I know he loves me but I just don't understand why he doesn't want us to be together."

Padre Benitez nodded slowly as he gathered his thoughts, "What is it about Zorro that you love?" he asked.

She closed her eyes and thought for a moment before answering, "His courage and bravery, his willingness to risk his own life, his loyalty to our people, his compassion for others." she replied.

He nodded, "Of course, we all admire Zorro for those qualities but what is it about this man that has your heart?" he asked her as he began to see why Zorro may have doubts about her.

She frowned, "Well, I like him, I'm...well...um...attracted to him." she replied as she felt her cheeks reddened at such talk.

He smiled, "Yes of course you are but you don't know anything about him, he could be a monster under that mask."

Victoria shook her head, "No, he isn't a monster. I know in my heart that his bravery and compassion are in him, with or without the mask."

"Then why does he have this fear?" he asked softly, "You said that he fears that you would only love the hero not the man."

"That's what I don't understand, padre. I love him no matter who he is. Why can't he see that?" she asked in confusion.

Padre Benitez sighed as he reached out and gently touched her arm, "My child, a man's fears is not something you can understand without first understanding where it comes from."

She nodded, "He does doubt my love for him, he all but admitted that but what have I done to make him think that?"

He was pleased that she was starting to see beyond the love to the more intangible matters of fear and doubt. "Do you think he wears the mask all the time?" he asked.

She looked up in surprise and wondered why the good padre would change the subject like that, "Of course not, he would have a life of his own, a different life..." she stopped as she suddenly realised what she had said. "Madre de dios," she muttered, "It's in this other life that he feels that...I...I." she stopped, not wanting to say it.

"He feels what, my child?" he urged her to speak of it openly.

She closed her eyes against the hot tears that welled in her eyes, "He feels that I...I don't...like him, let alone love him. It's this that he fears, isn't it? That I don't love this other...part of him." she said as her voice wavered. "But why, how?" She shook her head in confusion.

"The Zorro you know is only one part of the man. You only see the courageous side, the compassionate side of him but Zorro, like every other man, has many different sides. He can be angry or pleased, he can be happy or sad. He may need to feel active and adventurous but he would also need time for peace and quiet, he might even like to read a book instead of picking up a sword."

She nodded as she slowly digested his words, "And it's this other...side of him that he feels I don't like? But why would he think that? Unless...unless I have said something to him that made him think like that." She turned once more to the padre and this time she couldn't stop the tears from flowing. "I've hurt him, I've hurt him terribly and I didn't realise. Oh padre, I would never hurt him, I love him."

Padre Benitez nodded as he held her hand in comfort, "I know you do, my child. Sometimes we unintentionally hurt the ones we love but it doesn't lessen the pain." he said.

Victoria nodded as she wiped her tears away, "What should I do? How can I stop hurting him when I don't know what I've said? I don't even know who he is."

"My child, you already know who he is, you just need to look into your mind and not your heart. Once you know, only then can you heal the pain." The good padre said as he patted her hand before he stood up and quietly walked away.

She frowned in confusion at his words; that she already knew the identity of Zorro and that all she had to do was to look into her mind. She opened her hand that held her ring; her palm red where the stone had dug into her skin and tried to make sense of her conversation with the padre as well as what Zorro had told her before he proposed to her. She let out a long slow breath as she gathered her thoughts; she knew that Zorro doubted her love for the entire man and not just what he appeared to be and those doubts came from something that she had said to him, something that could not have been a single occurrence but something she had done over the years and had continued to do so. She felt tears in her eyes once more at the pain she must have caused him from her words; words that she would not have said if she had only had known who he was.

She slowly let out another long breath as she realised that she had to know Zorro, had to know him very well for her to make comments against him. But who was Zorro? The padre told her that she knew who he was but surely she would have realised it long before this. Or had she and somehow didn't want to believe who it was because he didn't measure up to her views of what a man should be but that meant that she saw him as something less of a man. Who was it that she treated like that, who was it that she wanted to be more of a man than what he was.

"Madre de dios," she muttered as she felt her chest constrict with pain as an image of a man floated before her eyes, "Diego! Oh god I've always compared him with Zorro, that he should be more like him." She closed her eyes against the image of Zorro and Diego merging together to form one complete man but her mind wouldn't let it go away. She remembered how she spoke of his love of books and sciences, of being a peaceful man instead a man of action and so many other things. She thought she was teasing him, wanting to see what passion, if any, lay beneath his calm exterior but what if he misunderstood her teasing for criticism? No wonder he doubted her love.

She opened her eyes and gazed down at the ring in her hand, "Forgive me Diego." she said softly, "I never meant to hurt you but I will make it up to you. I will show you that I do love you, that I do respect all sides of you. I will restore your faith in me, in our love for each other."