Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho or Rent.
For Kitty. This is the work of genius I've been obsessing over for a long time now. Since you can't see the show and, to my knowledge, haven't seen the movie, I thought I'd write it out for you. I truly hope you like it as much as I do.
I've been in a Rent-obsessive mood lately, and I haven't had any brilliant ideas for fanfics, so I decided to write out Rent, except with the Yu Yu Hakusho characters.
PLEASE READ THIS SECTION. IT IS EXTREMELY IMPORTANT.
1. This story is a mix of the Rent Broadway production, the Rent movie, and a few minor ideas of my own.
2. Since Rent is a musical, there are songs in this story. I've tried my best to convey them. Even so, it's hard to imagine the songs, so I've posted a link further along in my notes that might be helpful.
2. Instead of using the Rent characters, I have used some major characters from Yu Yu Hakusho.
3. I've tried to best match the personalities and relationships of the YYH characters with the personalities and relationships of the Rent characters, but sometimes it didn't quite work that way. For the Rent story to work, I needed to adjust the characters. This means that some characters are OOC.
For example, Keiko as a stripper? Hiei as a social, helpful, random human being? I needed to do that to get the relationships straight. Originally, Yusuke was playing Mark, Hiei was Roger, and Yukina was Mimi. But that would mean Yusuke had previously been dating Botan, and that now Hiei would be dating his sister. If I made Keiko into Mimi and left Hiei as Roger (whose character he best suits) Hiei would be going out with Keiko, leaving Yusuke…where? So now, Yusuke is Roger, going out with Keiko as Mimi. Hiei has been moved to Mark's role.
4. DO NOT BASH ME for making Shizuru and Botan lesbian lovers, for making Touya a drag queen, or for making Kurama and Touya gay lovers. DO NOT BASH ME for making Yusuke, Keiko, Touya, and Kurama have AIDS. This is how Rent is intended to work. If you don't like the pairings or the involvement of a disease, go jump off the Empire State Building.
5. If you don't understand the story, feel free to ask me questions. I'm a Rent freak…I should be able to answer any questions you might have. If you don't feel like asking me a question, you can watch the movie for yourselves. It comes out on DVD on Feb. 21st, but if you can't wait that long, I found a copy of it here:
H t t p (insert colon here) (insert slash here) / p r o f i l e . m y s p a c e . c o m / I n d e x . c f m ? f u s e a c ti o n (insert equal sign here)u s e r . V i e w p r o fi l e & f ri e n di d (insert equal sign here) 4 5 0 9 3 1 7 6
Just scroll all the way to the right, go down a little, and you should see a video screen loading. It's the entire movie, and it's really good.
6. For those familiar with the show/movie, I hope I've done it justice in writing form.
7. CAST LIST for Chapter 1
Hiei: Mark Cohen (filmmaker; Jewish)
Yusuke: Roger Davis (guitarist; former junkie; HIV positive)
Mukuro: Mark's mother
Kurama: Tom Collins (gay; teacher; anarchist; addicted to weed; has AIDS)
Koenma: Benjamin Coffin III (owns the apartments and the lot next to them through marriage to a wealthy woman)
Botan: Maureen Johnson (lesbian; performing artist)
Shizuru: Joanne Jefferson (lesbian; lawyer)
I think that's all my notes for now. Enjoy the fic, everybody! And please review!
The story begins in New York City, on Christmas Eve, with a film-maker, Hiei, and his roommate, a musician named Yusuke.
They lived in an industrial loft on the corner of 11th Street and Avenue B, the top floor of what was once a music-publishing factory. Old rock-'n'-roll posters hung on the walls. They had Yusuke's picture advertising gigs at CBGB's and the Pyramid Club.
Hiei and Yusuke had an illegal wood-burning stove; its exhaust pipe crawled up to a skylight. All of their electrical appliances were plugged into one thick extension cord which snaked its way out a window.
Outside, a small tent city had sprung up in the lot next to their building. Inside, Hiei and Yusuke were freezing because they had no heat.
Hiei turned his camera to Yusuke, who was sitting on a metal table in the center of the room.
"Smile!" Hiei exclaimed.
Yusuke shot him a look and went back to plucking the rusty strings on his beat-up electric guitar.
Hiei sighed and began focusing the camera on various points around the loft. "December 24th, nine p.m. Eastern Standard time. From here on in I shoot without a script. I guess I'll see if anything comes of it…instead of my old shit."
Yusuke snorted a laugh, and Hiei swung the camera back to him.
"First shot…Yusuke, tuning his Fender guitar," Hiei said, and continued with a muttered, "which he hasn't played in a year…"
Yusuke loudly complained, "This won't tune!"
"So we hear," Hiei retorted. He turned the camera so that he was filming himself. "You'll have to excuse Yusuke…he's just coming back from half a year of withdrawal."
"Are you talking to me?" Yusuke asked in annoyance, glaring up from his guitar.
"No…not at all," Hiei said, and brought the camera back around to Yusuke. "Alright, now I am. Tell the folks at home what you're doing, Yusuke."
Yusuke rolled his eyes. "I'm writing one great song—"
The ringing of their telephone cut him off.
"Saved," he breathed.
Hiei swung the camera around again. "Zoom in on the answering machine," he said, and the machine then emitted a horrid-sounding "SPEAK!" in the exaggerated voices of Hiei and Yusuke.
A loud voice was heard next, saying, "That was a very loud beep! I don't even know if this is working…Hiei, are you there? Are you screening your calls? It's Mom!"
Hiei clapped a hand to his forehead and groaned, "Not her!"
Yusuke grinned. "Good old lady Mukuro, wishing her son and his roommate a Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah…"
"Shut it," Hiei growled.
"Well…I just wanted to call and say that your father and I love you and that we'll miss you tomorrow," Hiei's mother continued. "Yukina and the kids are here; they send their love, of course. By the way, I hope you like that hot plate I sent you. Just be sure not to leave it on when you leave the house, dear…don't you remember that incident with Kazuma and the fire alarm?"
Both Yusuke and Hiei snorted laughter, remembering the event well.
"Anyway," Mukuro went on, "I'm sorry to hear that Botan dumped you. But you know what, son? I say, "C'est la vie!" So let her be a lesbian! Don't you worry…she doesn't know what she's missing! Love, Mom."
She finally hung up the phone. Hiei let out an exasperated sigh and focused the camera on his roommate once more. "Tell the folks at home what you're doing, Yusuke."
Yusuke shook his head in disbelief. "I'm writing one great song—"
The ringing of the phone cut him off yet again.
"Yes," he hissed.
"And we screen," Hiei said, rounding the camera on the answering machine once more as it let out, "SPEAK!"
The voice of Kurama Minamino, also known as Shuichi, came from the machine next. He sang, "Chestnuts roasting…"
Hiei vaulted for the phone. "Kurama!" he exclaimed when he picked it up. Kurama had been out of town for seven months.
"Hey, I'm downstairs, so throw down the key, alright?" Kurama said.
"Sure." Hiei hung up, went to the balcony of the loft, and dropped the key to their door to the waiting red-head below.
"Thanks, I'll be right up," Kurama shouted to him, hanging up the pay phone he had called from.
Hiei nodded and went back inside.
Kurama threw his bag over his shoulder and headed toward the building door. Suddenly a group of guys walked up to him. "Hey man…you got a light?" one asked.
"Yeah…" Kurama answered, but when he reached into his pocket for a lighter, one of the thugs punched him in the gut. He was taken by surprise, but he kicked the punk, obviously the leader, in the crotch and ran.
"Shit!" the guy exclaimed, and the rest of the gang ran after Kurama. They soon cornered him in a side alley, beat him up, and stole his stuff, which didn't amount to much, but it included his coat, and it was freezing. He lay in the alley, bleeding.
Back in the loft, the phone had rung again. Hiei thought it was Kurama calling back and didn't screen. "Hey, what's taking you so long?" he asked.
"Ho ho ho!" came the voice of their landlord.
"Koenma!" Hiei said in surprise, holding the phone between him and Yusuke.
"Shit," Yusuke groaned.
"Yo dudes, merry Christmas Eve. I'm on my way."
"Great!" Hiei said, mocking enthusiasm.
"Fuck," echoed Yusuke, softly enough so that Koenma wouldn't hear him.
"Yeah, I need the rent," Koenma said.
"Hang on…what rent?" Hiei asked.
"This past year's rent, which I let slide."
"But you said we were golden!"
"When you bought the building," Yusuke chimed in.
"When we were roommates," Hiei said. "Don't you remember? You lived here."
"Ah yes, how could I forget?" Koenma answered. "It was you two, me, Kurama, and…Botan, right? How is the drama queen?"
"Botan?" Hiei questioned. "Oh…she's getting ready for her performance."
"Are you still her production manager?"
"I was bumped two days ago."
"You still dating her?"
"What is this, 20 Questions?" Hiei asked in annoyance.
"She dumped him last month," Yusuke answered, smirking.
Hiei glared at him.
"What? So she's got a new man?"
"Well…no," Hiei admitted.
"C'mon…what's his name?"
"She's a lawyer named Shizuru."
"She?" Koenma started cracking up on the other end of the line. Yusuke smirked again, and Hiei sighed.
"So she turned lesbian on you, huh? Sorry about that. Back to my point…the rent is due. Pay it, or I'll have to evict." With that, Koenma hung up.
"I wish I could strangle you right now," Hiei said to his roommate, slamming the phone onto the receiver.
Yusuke chuckled, shook his head, and began to pick out Musetta's Waltz on his electric guitar. Suddenly, the power on the amp blew, and the loft was bathed in darkness.
"Typical!" Hiei yelled. "The power blows!"
Both Yusuke and Hiei leapt up as an inexistent rock band began to play.
"How do you document real life when real life's getting more like fiction each day?" Hiei asked, singing with the music. "Headlines, breadlines blow my mind and now this deadline: "Eviction or pay"—RENT!"
"How do you write a song when the chords sound wrong—though they once sounded right and rare?" Yusuke sang. "But the notes are sour. Where is they power you once had to ignite the air?"
"And we're hungry and frozen!"
"Some life that we've chosen."
"How we gonna pay?" they sang together. "How we gonna pay? How we gonna pay last year's rent?"
Yusuke tossed candles from the storage closet to Hiei, who tried to light them with minimal matches.
"How do you start a fire when there's nothing to burn and it feels like something's stuck in your flue?" Yusuke sang, rolling out their illegal wood-burning stove.
"How can you generate heat when you can feel your feet and they're turning blue?"
Yusuke began ripping down papers from the walls, and Hiei collected his old manuscripts.
"You light up a mean blaze," Hiei said.
"With posters," Yusuke answered, lighting his own gig advertisements on fire and throwing them into the barrel.
"And screenplays." Hiei did the same with his film writings.
"How we gonna pay? How we gonna pay? How we gonna pay last year's rent?"
The music lowered. Outside the loft, at a distant pay phone, Shizuru Kuwabara placed a call. "Don't screen, Botan. It's me, Shizuru…your substitute production manager! Did you eat? No, don't change the subject…Darling! You haven't eaten all day! You won't throw up, believe me. The digital delay? Well…it didn't blow up…exactly…there may have been one teeny, tiny spark…you're NOT calling Hiei!"
In the dark side alley, Kurama struggled to stand. He leaned against a brick wall, panting. "How do you stay on your feet when on every street it's Trick or Treat—and tonight, it's Trick?" he groaned. ""Welcome back to town!" I should lie down…everything's brown and…oh, I feel sick."
Back at the loft, Hiei ran out onto the balcony to look for Kurama. "Where is he?"
In the alley, Kurama sank to the ground. "I'm getting dizzy…"
Hiei ran back into the loft and continued feeding papers to the fire with Yusuke.
"How we gonna pay? How we gonna pay? How we gonna pay last year's rent?" they sang.
Hiei glanced at a script page and read, "The music ignites the night with passion and fire!" He shook his head and tossed it into the flame.
Yusuke grabbed another page of his manuscript and read, "The narration crackles and pops with incendiary wit!"
Hiei sighed and grabbed his camera. "Zoom in as we burn the past to the ground, and feel the heat of the future's glow."
The phone suddenly rang. Shrugging, Hiei picked it up. "Hello? Botan? Your equipment won't work? Okay, all right—I'll go!" He slammed the phone down.
Hiei and Yusuke go out onto the balcony to see that all the other inhabitants of the buildings had done the same. They were all holding Eviction Notices, obviously posted by Koenma, and burning them as they dropped them to the street below.
"How do you leave the past behind when it keep finding ways to get to your heart?" they all sang in unison. "It reaches way down deep and tears you inside out—till you're torn apart! Rent!"
Koenma drove up in his Range Rover.
"How can you connect in an age where strangers, landlords, lovers—your own blood cells betray?" the tenants sang. "What binds the fabric together when the raging, shifting winds of change keep ripping away?"
Koenma got out of his car and slammed the door. "Throw a line in the sand and then make a stand!"
Yusuke turned to Hiei and mocked a swordfight. "Use your camera to spar!"
"Use your guitar," Hiei retorted.
The tenants yelled, "When they act tough you call their bluff! We're not gonna pay! We're not gonna pay! We're not gonna pay last year's rent—this year's rent—next year's rent! We're not gonna pay rent!
"Cause everything is rent!" Hiei and Yusuke sang, and the inexistent guitar and drums gave them an amazing finish to the song.
"Hey you two, come down here!" Koenma called up to them.
"Coming," Hiei said, and they disappeared into the loft.
Koenma tapped his foot while he was waiting. He saw an old man leaning against his car. "Hey, you bum! Get your ass of the Range Rover!"
The old guy rolled his eyes and shuffled away.
"You know, that attitude toward the homeless is exactly what Botan is protesting," Hiei said as he and Yusuke appeared in the doorway.
"Botan is protesting loosing her performance space. She has nothing against my attitude," Koenma said snidely.
"What's happened to the Koenma we used to know?" Yusuke asked. "What happened to your heart? What about the ideals you once pursued?"
"I'm the owner of that lot next door, and as the owner, I have the right to do with it as I please."
"Well, happy birthday, Jesus!" Yusuke scoffed.
"The rent," Koenma pressed.
"You're wasting your time. You know we're broke," Yusuke said.
"And you broke your word…this is ridiculous!" Hiei yelled.
Koenma looked at him. "Well, maybe there is a way you won't have to pay."
"Like what?"
"Like…convince Botan to cancel her protest."
"Why us?" Hiei exclaimed. "Why don't you just call the cops, or...get an injunction or something?"
"I called the cops, and they're on standby," Koenma answered. "But my major investor…"
"Father-in-law," Hiei coughed.
"…would rather that I handled this quietly."
"You can't quietly wipe out an entire tent city and then watch "It's a Wonderful Life" on TV!" Yusuke objected.
"You want to produce films and write songs? Huh?" Koenma accused. "Well, you need somewhere to do it. And a state-of-the-art, digital, virtual interactive studio is what we used to dream about, isn't it? It would let us do our work, and get paid at the same time."
Yusuke and Hiei exchanged skeptical looks.
"You'll see, boys!" Koenma encouraged. "We'd rent the condos on top…you'd stay for free, of course. You'd have it made! All you need to do is stop the protest."
Yusuke glared at him, and Hiei remained silent.
"You'll see—or you'll pack!" Koenma turned and walked back to his car.
Yusuke thrust his thumb over his shoulder in Koenma's direction. "You know, he could really use some Prozac."
"Or heavy drugs," Hiei suggested.
"Or group hugs," sneered Yusuke. They both laughed.
"Hey, Koenma!" Hiei shouted after the Range Rover disappearing down the street. "We'll find a way to save the protest!"
"C'mon, it's freezing out here. Let's get back inside…not that it's much better," Yusuke said.
"Yeah, you're right." Hiei followed the guitarist back into the building.
