This is little glimpses, snapshots, scenes, of the days that ultimately caused the first generation that we love so much (marauders and Lily) to fall to pieces. Felt very sad when I wrote this. The song is Happy Ending by Mika.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the song Happy Ending by Mika.
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This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.
October 30, 1981: Sirius felt guilty. He wonders if it's the right thing. But he knows he's the easiest target, but no one would suspect a weak, talentless thing like Peter. Yes, they would finalize it tonight.
Remus was the only conclusion he could come to. It certainly wasn't him, and it couldn't be Peter, because Peter knew he would be helpless if he strayed from his friends. Peter wouldn't risk something like that. Feelings of doubt ebbing away with that reassuring thought, that he was possibly saving his friends lives, fed him and kept him satisfied while he collected Peter.
Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life
Can't get no love without sacrifice
If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well
A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell
Later on: James watched through the window of their home. Watched and waited. Sirius and Peter would be there any minute now. He could hear Lily crooning to baby Harry in the living room, his gurgles of glee resonating through the house. James often wondered how he had got so lucky. Now the only question was when his luck would run out, and Sirius was coming with Peter to make the switch. They would prolong their safety, until something could be done.
He saw them appear on their walk, and before they even came to the door asked them what their animagus forms were.
James led the dog and the rat inside where they transformed again. Lily had heard, and she walked into the room carrying baby Harry.
"Let me just put him in bed," she said, jerking her head towards the now sleeping boy.
James kissed Harry on the head, as did the others. Lily took him up, and they sat in silence until she came back down again.
Tonight was it.
They made the switch.
This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I feel as if I'm wastin'
And I'm wastin' everyday
October 31, 1981; Midday: Remus felt terribly guilty. Peter had come by, and had just left. They'd been discussing options and he's come to the heartrending conclusion of Sirius. It wasn't him. And Peter seemed just as confused as he did. Not to mention Sirius was very good at keeping things from people. It took them all about six years to figure out what went on in Sirius' house, and that was only after they saw the bruises. Remus shook his head. He didn't want to believe it.
But he had to.
This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.
October 31, 1981; Midnight: James, Lily, and Harry rested comfortably on the couch. Lily was wrapped in James' strong arms, he was stroking her hair, and they felt completely at peace. Harry was encompassed by Lily's tender touch, asleep, and she stared into the roaring fireplace, just enjoying this time when time itself seemed to stop, and that the moment seemed like it could go on forever.
Neither of them had had the heart to bring Harry upstairs to his room. He looked too serene, too beautiful, too peaceful to even risk the notion of waking him on the stairs.
And so they sat.
And then, it happened. The wards around their house flared, a siren wailed in their house.
They jumped to their feet.
Lily grabbed James and held him close for a few seconds. Her face was white, her eyes started to water, she knew what was happening.
"I love you James," she whispered, tears spilling from her eyes.
"I love you too, Lily," he said, then turned up sharply at a loud crack of a snapping branch form their front yard.
"We can't waste any more time! Lily, take Harry and go! It's him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off – "
Lily clutched Harry, who had awoken and was now bawling loudly. She stumbled from the room and ran up the stairs, into the nursery.
Down stairs she heard a cackle of high-pitched laughter – oh, god. She held Harry close. "I love you baby," she whispered. "You're my little boy and I love you with all my heart, I'd do anything to protect you." Lily was crying freely now, and let out a sob as she heard a loud thump downstairs.
Oh god, she pressed her eyes closed. My James, my beautiful James, you can't be dead. Oh, dear James, how could this have happened?
Lily's tears dried, and now she got angry. She would protect Harry any way she had to, she would die for him.
She heard him ascending slowly, just for the torture of the wait. She covered Harry's body with her own, and looked Voldemort right in the eye as he crossed the threshold.
"Let me have the boy, and I'll spare your life," he said in a cold, high voice.
"Not Harry, not Harry, please not Harry!" she cried, still covering him.
"Stand aside, you silly girl," he snarled. She didn't move. "Stand aside, now!"
"Not Harry, please, no, take me, kill me instead!"
"Move aside!"
"Not Harry! Please, have mercy, have mercy!"
Voldemort laughed and raised his wand, and Lily screamed in terror. Not for herself, but for Harry.
"Avada Kedavra!"
2 o'clock in the morning, something's on my mind
Can't get no rest; keep walkin' around
If I pretend that nothin' ever went wrong, I can get to my sleep
I can think that we just carried on
November 1, 1981; Early in the Morning:
An hour ago, Sirius had been to Peter's place to check up on him, because he couldn't sleep. He found it empty. Knowing immediately what must have happened, but refusing to believe it, he hopped on his flying motorcycle and roared off into the night.
When he arrived at Godric's Hollow, he could clearly see the ruins of their Ex-House.
He gingerly stepped inside, and the first thing he saw was a crumpled heap in the corner of the blasted living room. Long fingers of icy fear clutched at Sirius' heart as he stepped towards the heap and turned it over.
Messy black hair, glasses askew, hazel-eyed body of James stared blankly at the ceiling. It looked like James, but this wasn't James. James never had such a blank, empty look on his face, even when he was sleeping. James never had a fish-eyed stare, he always looked at you when you were trying to get through, and Sirius couldn't get through! No, he told himself resolutely. It wasn't James. It couldn't be.
Sirius felt a lump rise in his throat and a prickling feeling behind his eyes. His vision blurred and a few tears fell onto his friend's lifeless face.
Sirius pounded the floor with his fist, "Where's James!?" he demanded. "Where are you buddy, come on, this isn't you."
As expected, no response.
"James!" cried out Sirius, clawing at a feeble hope. "Come back, James!!"
Sobs racked his body.
"I need you…"
This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I feel as if I'm wastin'
And I'm wastin' everyday
A Few Moments Later: Sirius reluctantly left his friend and carefully climbed the stairs. The door to the nursery was hanging off of its hinges.
Oh god.
He saw her hair first, a fiery red halo surrounding her head. It took him a minute to realize he was staring at the dead version of Lily Potter, his good friend and someone whom he cared for very deeply.
He clutched her hand and choked out unintelligible noises and cried all over again. And then he heard a cry that was most certainly not him.
He gently moved Lily aside and there sat a bawling Harry, looking perfectly fine except for a thin lightning shaped scar on his head.
Sirius gathered Harry up in a bundle of blankets. He headed for the door, taking one last look at his dear friends(and in James' case, his deer friend). He met Hagrid arriving on the front lawn just as he stepped out.
Hagrid was white in the face. "Yer ter give him ter me. Dumbledore's orders."
"No, Hagrid, I'm his godfather, I'll take him," Sirius stated.
They argued about it for a few more minutes, but eventually Sirius let in defeat.
"Here, take my flying motorcycle, it'll get you there faster."
"But, - "
"I don't need it anymore," said Sirius firmly.
As Sirius watched Hagrid fly off into the night, a terrible anger coursed through his veins.
He needed revenge.
This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
Then live the rest of our life,
But not together.
November 2, 1981: Remus Lupin sat hunched over his kitchen table, an untouched firewhiskey adjacent to his right elbow, and his face buried in his hands.
Lily, James, I'm so sorry. We failed you, we failed you. It happened anyways. I failed you.
Little bit of love. Little bit of love.
November 3, 1981: Peter Pettigrew had started to relax. He was undetectable in a crowded street, and he felt safe.
Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love
A Few Moments Later: Sirius was advancing on Peter.
Peter was cornered. He did not feel safe anymore. So he decided that the best course of action was to screw over his best friend.
"Lily and James, Sirius!" he cried. "How could you?"
Sirius whipped out his wand but it was too late.
Boom.
Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love
Sirius briefly saw Peter the rat tear down the streets. He reflected on the past events, and he noticed the Magical Law Enforcement Squad running towards him, and he realized that they all thought it was him…
A sudden memory came to him, when they were in seventh year, towards the end.
Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love
June 5, 1978; Gryffindor Common Room: They sit around lounging in the common room, discussing their futures.
"I'm gonna be an auror!" shouts Sirius.
Remus snorts. "Yeah, right. You'd be voted most likely to get arrested!"
They laugh.
"Naw, I'm gonna be the auror," says James, sticking out his chest proudly.
"Really?" says Sirius mock-serious. "Because I was betting on Pete here to be the auror."
"No," says Remus. "I think Pete…" he ponders for a moment. "Will run a cheese shop!" he laughs, followed by the rest.
"Okay, so, I'm gonna be an auror, Pete's gonna run a cheese shop, Sirius is going to get carted off to prison," - here a pillow is thrown at James' head – "And what will you do, Remus?"
"He's gonna be a bum," supplies Sirius with a grin. "He's gonna be poor and living on the streets!"
Little bit of love, little bit of love
Little bit of love, little bit of love
November 3, 1981; Back to Present: Sirius feels himself getting carted away and doesn't protest. He thinks back on how most of them were accurate. And then, he tilts his head back and laughs. And as he laughs everything good is released, he's lost it all: his friends are either dead, traitors, or think he's the traitor. Along with the rest of the wizarding world.
I feel as if I feel as if I'm wastin'
And I'm wastin' everyday
November 30, 1981: In Azkaban: Sirius sits in his cold, dank cell. He can hear rough waves pounding the side of the tiny rock island he unwillingly inhabits and smell the reek of the Dementors as they constantly glide by. It's always freezing when they're around. Sometimes he tries to draw on the stone walls a bit, sometimes he'll observe and listen to other prisoner's crazed mutterings, or when someone new was brought in, or when someone left, he would see if they would come back. Some did, some didn't. Sometimes Sirius would transform into a dog, and he would feel more at ease with his canine mind. But most importantly, he clung to one thought. Not necessarily happy, not sad, but it was there to console him: I'm innocent, I'm innocent, I'm innocent…
This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
To live the rest of our life,
But not together.
Remus had been appalled, disgusted, and most of all: depressed. He was mourning over the loss of his three friends. Four, if you were to count Sirius. But Remus didn't count Sirius. Remus hated him. He wondered why Sirius didn't try to finish the job with him. Peter was just closer, I guess, he thinks bitterly. He felt an ache in his chest. He and Sirius were always very close. They could connect on many different levels. And a big part of Remus was screaming that it couldn't be Sirius, Sirius would never do that but Remus knew he was being illogical. That was a silly notion.
This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
This is the way that we love,
Like it's forever.
To live the rest of our life,
But not together.
April 14, 1983; Remus' Apartment; Nighttime: Remus had been slowly finding himself after his friend's tragic deaths. Slowly filling in the huge empty space in his heart, usually filled by James, Lily, Sirius, and Peter. He would never admit it, but he missed Sirius as much as he missed the others.
Time passes, Remus doesn't notice. He has the sudden urge, need, to go to the closet. He opens it up and rummages around in there, not knowing exactly what he is looking for but knowing that it'll feel right when he finds it. Remus picks up a large old box and opens it up.
Inside are hundreds of photographs. Individual shots, group shots, something silly, something planned. Pictures from the school days. Of him, self-conscious and intelligent
with boyish good-looks; of unruly James, with his untamable mane of black hair, glasses always at some awkward angle from the result of a prank, running, Quidditch, or beating each other up playfully; of wayward Sirius, the handsome heartthrob, with different expressions showing in the picture version's face: glee, glow, anger, annoyance, pride, joy, happiness, laughter, depression, and more; Peter, hidden talents in the shadows, a little bit shy to show that he really is intelligent, relying on Sirius and James, carrying out their little master plans; of intelligent and beautiful Lily Evans, most of these taken in the last year, most of them with her and James, and for some reason her hair was always fanning out behind her, in every picture, even the picture of her death.
Remus wipes a solitary tear that had managed to trickle it's why down his cheek. He has nothing left.
No one does.
No Happy Ending.
This is the way you left me,
I'm not pretending.
No hope, no love, no glory,
No Happy Ending.
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Well, hope you like it. I've just finished this. The exact time is Tuesday, May 29, 2007, 1:18 A.M.
I'm definately not supposed to be up this late. I'm tired so if you see a problem tell me in your review (hint, hint)
I really think it would be nice to give me a review, seeing as how I'm interrupting my sleep for YOUR needs, oh yes,you heard me correctly, YOUR needs.
SO drop off a review!
Good night! (Or...good morning?)
podge
