So this is the first fic I've ever wrtitten. It probably sucks, but hey I tried. Just let me know what you think (:
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I had been bestfriends with Jeff my whole life. We grew up living right next door from each other. It wasn't until recently that I was starting to see Jeff in a different way. I couldn't explain it, but lately every time Jeff would look at me I would always have to fight back the urge to kiss him. I was sure I was straight, but then why do I keep thinking about Jeff in that way? We were bestfriends, that's it. No, I can't just blow it off like this. There obviously was something there. Something that was more than friendship. I thought back to the first time I ever felt something change.
It happened about 2 months ago.
It was a Friday night and we were hanging out in our dorm. Sebastian had gone home for the weekend. Normally we both went home as well, but this time we decided to stay at Dalton. We haven't gotten to hang out, just the two of us, in a while. Either Sebastian or Trent was with us. But this was nice. I missed hanging with my bestfriend.
We decided to watch some Ghost Adventures. There was always a marathon every Friday night. It was the episode where they went back to the place they did their documentary before the actual series came out. This one always scared the crap outta me, probably cause one of the guys on the show had the same name as me and every time they'd get and EVP that said Nick I'd just jump. Jeff would always just laugh at me.
"Oh my god. You're such a scaredy cat."
"I am not!" I pushed Jeff and he nearly falls off the bed. I quickly grab him and pull him back up. "Sorry, didn't mean to push you so hard."
"Mmhm, sure you didn't."
"I didn't!"
"Relax, Nick. I was joking."
"I knew that." And that's when it happened. Jeff just looked at me and smiled. I couldn't help but stare at him, longer than I should be. I finally made myself look away. What was that, anyway? Why was I looking at Jeff like that? I went back to watching the show. We sat there in silence for the rest of the episode.
After the episode ended, we decided not to watch another one, well I decided, and Jeff just called me a scaredy cat again.
"So then what do you want to do Nicky?"
I couldn't think of anything, well I could be I just found myself lost for words.
I was staring at Jeff again. This time I was actually staring at his lips. I just had this sudden urge to just grab him and kiss him. No. I thought. Jeff is you're bestfriend, and you're straight for crying out loud. No. Kissing Jeff just wasn't an option.
"Nicky?" Jeff snapped his fingers in front of me face, snapping me out of my thoughts.
"Oh. Sorry."
"So, what were you thinking about anyway?"
Kissing you. I thought. "N-Nothing."
"Okay." I knew Jeff could tell I was lying but luckily Jeff was the type of person who didn't pry too much & I was thankful for that.
We just sat there for a while. I had decided to let Jeff continue to watch Ghost Adventures, I wasn't even really watching. I had laid down on my bed, trying to figure out what had happened before and why I couldn't stop thinking of kissing Jeff. That wasn't something I did. I was just really confused. Did I like Jeff? Like really like him, more than a friend? But how could I, I'm straight after all? Or am I?
That was the moment when I started questioning my sexuality. Maybe I did like guys. Or at least maybe I liked Jeff. I just really need to sort things out.
