Title: Love Will Tear Us Apart
Part 1/1
Genre: Drama, Romance, Angst
Rating: T
Word Count: 1,772
Characters: Oliver Queen, Felicity Smoak
Summary: In the twelve years since Oliver Queen had first laid eyes on Felicity Smoak, a lot had changed. He had changed, for better and for worse. But the change he made six years ago was one she could never forgive him for. Dying was not a choice, but becoming Ra's al Ghul was. [Part 1 of the Promises, Promises series]
A/N: Spoilers for up to 3x15, but nothing after that. This is just an idea I've been playing around with, as a 'what if Oliver accepted Ra's alGhul's offer.' This takes place six years in the future (six years after 3x15). This is a standalone oneshot, but I think I'm going to write a series of oneshots that all fit into the same future-verse.
Keep up to date with my fics/writing progress on Tumblr [signedxoxoxonelly]!
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters used, they belong to the CW and/or DC Comics. The title of the oneshot comes from the song of the same name by Fall Out Boy (original by Joy Division).
Enjoy!
xoxoxoNelly
Love Will Tear Us Apart
It had been twelve years since Oliver Queen had first laid eyes on Felicity Smoak in the darkened corner office of Queen Consolidated.
He smiled then.
It had been ten years since Oliver Queen had walked into the office of Felicity Smoak with a bullet-ridden laptop and listened to her ceaseless babble.
He smiled again.
It had been eight years since Oliver Queen had first told Felicity Smoak he was in love with her, under the guise of luring Slade Wilson to an abandoned mansion.
He held his breath then.
It had been seven years since Oliver Queen had died at the hands of Ra's al Ghul, leaving Felicity Smoak to grieve and move on.
He held his breath again.
It had been six years and six months since Oliver Queen had risen from the dead to find Felicity Smoak no longer wanted his love.
He frowned then.
It had been six years since Oliver Queen had been offered the mantle of Ra's al Ghul, and Felicity Smoak had fallen into the arms of Ray Palmer instead of his.
He frowned again.
It had been five years and ten months since Oliver Queen had accepted the offer proposed by Ra's al Ghul and left his heart with Felicity Smoak—who no longer wanted the responsibility.
He touched her shoulder then.
It had been five years and six months since Felicity Smoak had last laid eyes on Oliver Queen, in the same office where he had first seen her.
He touched her shoulder again.
Felicity Smoak knew Oliver was still alive, she also had a vague idea of where he was located because she tracked him to the best of her ability considering he often blinked off the radar. She was pretty sure the glimpses she caught of him on facial recognition searches were only caught because he allowed her to. He could make himself disappear completely if he truly wanted to.
But, even now, he protected her—from the worry that would eat away at her if she didn't know whether he was alive or dead.
He protected her in other ways as well.
The underground world of crime and blood knew not to go anywhere near Felicity Smoak, or else face the wrath of the Demon. She was completely off limits, and everyone feared the Demon, no one dared to challenge him. She hadn't been caught in the cross-hairs of a villain, or kidnapped for leverage in over five years.
It was all his doing. All because he had chosen to leave again.
She was so engrossed in her work, she barely heard the rapping of knuckles on the glass door, followed by Oliver's familiar voice calling out her name.
She glanced up, blinking rapidly as her eyes adjusted to the darkness that had seemed to suddenly consume her office. The last time she'd taken a break, the sun had still been up.
She glanced at the clock in the corner of her laptop screen. 10:43 PM.
Her eyes went back to Oliver, who had taken several steps into her office, hands in the pockets of his cargo pants, studying the office that had at one point in time been his. There was a concentrated, reminiscent look on his face.
His eyes fell on her and he smiled sadly, yet fondly. "The first time I ever saw you was in this room."
Her brows furrowed, "I'm pretty sure the first time we met was in my office in the IT department," she corrected gently as she rolled her chair back, arching her neck in a stretch.
Oliver shook his head slowly, easing forward another few feet, "no, it was in here. You didn't know I was here. It was back when it was my mother's office."
She blinked as her mind whirled, trying to place how that had been possible.
"I didn't start working for QC until after you had gone missing."
"I know," his eyes swept over the items on her desk before lifting to her face once more, "I was working for A.R.G.U.S. when I came back to Starling, and I saw you in this office, babbling," he chuckled softly, "talking to a picture of me. You said I was cute."
He looked so pleased with himself for that flicker of a moment, and then his expression sobered and she realized why he was here.
"Why are you telling me this?" She asked, a frown weighing down her pink lips.
He sighed, sliding his hands out of his pockets as she stepped around her desk to stand in front of him.
His hand curled over her shoulder, "I'm leaving."
She stared up at him, reaching a hand up to curl around his forearm and hold it in place, "you don't have to do this."
He smiled sadly, "I want to. I've chosen this, Felicity."
"You're not Ra's al Ghul."
"You don't know that Felicity. For a time, I was."
"But that was on the island, or in Hong Kong, or wherever else you were. That's not you anymore."
He shook his head, his head turning as he looked out the wall of windows at the city, "it will have to be me again."
"Oliver, just because I'm with Ray doesn't mean—"
His expression hardened, his hand dropped from her shoulder, "I'm not making this decision because you're dating Ray." He looked hurt, stunned that she would assume such a thing. "I'm doing this because it's the best way to keep this city safe. It's the best way to keep everyone I love safe."
"It's an offer you just can't refuse." She spoke the words bitterly.
He sighed, exhaustion painting his features, "Felicity," he sighed again, heavier than the last, "it's better this way." He nodded once, to himself, before his crystal blue eyes met hers, "I will miss you, Felicity." He stepped back, "goodbye."
He turned and walked away.
"I love you."
She felt the guilt drown her immediately, because how dare she use that against him.
He froze, his shoulders tight, but he did not speak.
It was a cowardly thing, to throw the words at him now. It was selfish, she was trying to keep him when she had no intention of being with him. She just wanted to keep him somewhere that she could watch him and protect him. She could do neither of those things if he was in Nanda Parbat.
If she had meant the words, he would have stayed, for her.
But, just as she had always known when he was lying, he knew when she was lying too.
"Goodbye." He repeated.
Then he was gone and she felt horrible that the last thing she had said to him was not goodbye, not that she would miss him—but three words he had been waiting to hear for months that had been uttered in a desperate attempt to manipulate him.
She was no better than Ra's al Ghul, using his humanity against him.
He was different now, yet still her same Oliver.
There was an magisterial air about him now, a dignified and regal aura that emanated from him in imposing waves. He felt important, he looked like a venerable leader who was feared and awe-inspiring.
Yet she knew the scars that littered his body and his heart.
She was certain there were new scars she was not aware of, scars that she would never be privy to due to their strained relationship.
The robes her wore were made of heavy, embroidered fabric in a dark forest green that was reminiscent of his days as the Arrow, and a hood was pushed down from his head, pooling at the back of his neck, nestled between his shoulder blades.
His eyes were still the same as he stared at her.
It was the first time he had been back in Starling City in five years, as far as she was aware. He had popped up everywhere around the globe except in his hometown. It was probably best that way.
"Felicity."
She was surprised when he said her name. She pressed her lips together, her fingers rubbing along the band that decorated her left ring finger. Had he noticed it yet?
"Hello, Ra's."
He smirked bitterly at the name. They hadn't realized it at first, but Ra's al Ghul was a title, not a true name. It was a title that Oliver Queen had now taken on, a new faucet to his already fractured personalities.
She wasn't sure why he was in Starling City. Diggle hadn't said anything about him—she knew Diggle still kept in contact with Oliver, that Diggle was Oliver's connection to the city, to his sister. But Diggle never spoke of Oliver to her. She figured Oliver had asked for it to be that way.
"What brings you to Starling?" She asked as she rose from her desk and walked around to the other side, closer to where he was standing, along the wall of windows.
He stared down at the city, not at her, "an enemy of the League has found it's way into Starling."
"I don't see why you had to come personally. Couldn't you have just sent one of your lackeys to handle it?"
"This enemy is not one I take lightly." He clasped his hands behind his back. "And I'm in need of your help."
"Shouldn't you be bleeding in the back of Mini Cooper in order to ask that?" she arched a brow.
"You no longer own a Mini Cooper."
She wanted to ask him how he knew that, but she shouldn't be surprised that he obtained information about her.
She crossed her arms over her chest, her left thumb rubbing against the underside of her engagement, a nervous habit she had developed over the year. She studied his profile for a long moment, taking in the way the lights of Starling City haloed his features.
Feeling her gaze on him, he turned his head, their eyes meeting.
She dropped her hands to her sides, wetting her lips, she sucked in a deep breath.
"Okay. I'll help."
He smirked then.
Five years, five months and twenty-nine days after Felicity Smoak had last seen Oliver Queen, he returned to their city and he asked for her help. She stumbled over her words after she had agreed to aid him, a babble to rival all babbles she had uttered before.
He smirked again.
