My life is boring. Let's face it. I live on a studio apartment that is a mess because I thought designing would be my passion. The thing is I don't know what I want to be my profession. I stare blankly at a wall looking at the middle of my dart board trying to aim last dart. I notice that the rest of the darts are nowhere near the Bull's-eye. Maybe this is symbolic of something. Possibly my falling career? Or my Instagram page with zero followers? I put down the dart realizing I'll never hit the bull's-eye. My unpopularity has come to a point where I have to consider going outside. I close my laptop and haul myself off my bed. I look in my mirror staring at my outfit. I leave the house not caring how I look. There is approximately 30 minutes till Chick-Fill-A closes and I got to make it.
I pull up to the Chick- Fill-A and it's closed! I want to weep at the sight of the closed sign.
"Open up!" I scream so loud that it is deafening.
"We're closed." The scared employees utter.
"I'm gonna die out here! "I screamed with my face pushed against the glass.
I see the employee of the restaurant quickly reach in his right pocket and I immediately jump back due to the blinding light flashed in my face. The light keeps turning off and then flashing in till I leave. I get in my car and check my Instagram. I'VE GOT MY FIRST FOLLOWER. I check the popular pictures tab and see it is flooded with pictures of me in front of Chick-Fill-A looking as if killing someone is my intention. Great, now my social life was owned by a Chick-Fill-A employee. I drive home listening to the radio. Then suddenly an ad the catches my attention comes on.
"Do you want to explore Kenya?" Says a voice that sounds identical to Shia Labeouf's. "Do you not know your passion in life?"Then call 1-888-IAM-LAME,"
I think to myself, could this be my calling? I reach for my phone to call in. The waiting music is Shia Labeouf screaming at me. I started to second guess this but before I could Morgan Freeman answered the phone.
"Hello loser."He says, I can't feel insulted because his voice is so suave.
"You sound a lot like Morgan Freā¦."I say but he interrupts me before I could finish.
"Shia and I will be picking you up tomorrow, Pack everything you need, Bye."He hung immediately after those words were said.
The next morning I ran outside to the rooftop of my building. There was the sound of a helicopter interrupting my sleep. After climbing the gruesome amount of stairs, I open the door to the rooftop surprised to see the one and only Morgan Freeman and Shia Labeouf standing next to a helicopter.
"You got everything you need?" Says Morgan
Surprised by the chaos of all this I responded with silence. Shia catches on and tells Morgan I haven't packed. Morgan and Shia come to my apartment to help me pick out clothes. Shia tries on one of my crop tops ripping them in the act. After I got all packed, Shia and Morgan escorted me to the helicopter. While we were on the helicopter Morgan, Shia and I started to go through a list of nick names for each other. Morgan and I decided to call Shia, Shi-Shi. Morgan and Shia both were in favor of calling me loser, And Shi-Shi and I were in favor of calling Morgan, Morg.
As the helicopter came to a stop, I noticed we had landed in the beautiful Kenya. We headed to where we would be living for god knows how long. As I got closer to place I would be spending my future at I noticed it was a beach house. I insisted we go down to the beach.
"Race ya!" Said Shia as he ran towards the beach with Morgan behind him.
I ran to try and catch up but then hit something and face planted in to a rock. Morg and Shi-Shi come to see if I'm okay. I try to communicate but my mouth squirts out blood.
3 DAYSLATER
Shi-Shi, Morg and I have to leave soon so we pack for home. We embrace each other in a group hug and get on the helicopter. I feel a little sad leaving them and I'm positive the feeling is mutual. As I'm on the helicopter, Shia leans over to tell me that his mission coming here was to assassinate me for the Chick-Fill-A employee, and suddenly everything makes sense.
TO BE CONTINUED ...
