Title: Fragment of Light
Rating: M
Pairing: Ricky/Adrian; Grace/Adrian
Notes: Somewhat-mostly canon. Some changes here and there. ;)
This is a story inspired by my other story Ashes and Wine on my account sweetsilverlining (which I lost the account information for).
So, credit given to my account sweetsilverlining for the story. Haha. This one is different, but I hope you enjoy. Ricky and Adrian all the way. It'll get there. Here we go.


It's been two years since Amy left, leaving John and Ricky the night behind as she accepted a scholarship to Hudson University to study music and play in the college's concert and marching band; Ricky remembers the night she told him, the night before they were to get married, the veins in his neck protruding, the salt in his angry tears burning his eyes, his voice straining from yelling.

As he stood there with Amy, she became a stranger to him.

Someone he didn't want to know.

In that moment, he hated her. He hated her because he loved her and she was leaving him, selfishly, and not only him, but John; leaving him was unfathomable to Ricky.

"If you're gonna be like that, then I hate you too," Amy cried.

He half smirked, half scowled. "And what do you hate me for? Huh? I changed my whole life for you. I'm a great guy. I don't cheat on you; I take care of you and John; and I'm responsible, and-"

"You're not in love with me, if that's what you were going to say. You're not in love with me."

"I love you, Amy."

"I know that you love me, Ricky. But you aren't in love with me. You're just marrying me because of John."

"What difference does that make?"

"All the difference in the world."

And he realized, with certainty, as she ended their relationship with her final statement, that she was right.

Ricky wrapped an arm around his son as he read him a book, fighting back tears as he reached the last line, fighting for his son, the one thing that was his world now: the one thing he'd die for. "And she lived happily ever after."

He kissed him on the head. "And so will we," he whispered.


Adrian has her hair professionally cut just slightly below her shoulders. As she glances at herself in the mirror, she tells the hair stylist thank you and smiles at herself, trying to give her best genuine smile. Every year is an opportunity to start over, she tells herself, trying on a new sort of optimism. Going into her sophomore year of college, she has her whole life ahead of her, a new start. She takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. "I like it," she says with confidence. Her naturally wavy hair has been straightened and her dark raven hair lightened softly with highlights. She wears a strapless, blue dress that hugs the curves of her body.

Like she said, it's a new start. A new Adrian.

As she gazes at herself in the mirror, she catches her own eyes reflecting back at her and stares, not seeing, as her past flashes before her.

Omar leaving to attend Hudson University in New York, asking her to come with him; Adrian refusing to go with him, enraged.

Her engagement to Omar.

Her marriage to Ben.

Her baby, Mercy...

Trying to get pregnant again; exercising every morning to get back into shape and pull herself out of her depression.

Grief, sabotage, anger, heartbreak, resentment, rumination. All of these emotions return to her before she blinks and snaps back to reality when she hears the hair stylist say her name, not letting herself go any deeper down the rabbit hole.

That night, she finds herself locking her apartment door on campus where she attends classes and going to a pre-semester party in some dorm room after receiving an invitation from Grace earlier that evening. Despite her reluctance to go, she thought it over and decided it to be a good idea. This was an opportunity to express her new self, and she looked hot, if she did say so herself. Single, sexy, and smart, she deserved to be at this party as much as anyone else. Hell, she deserved to enjoy herself.

But that's the last reason on her mind that she prepares a tequila and rum margarita, swirling her straw around in her glass. She sits at the glass table alone as music bounces off the walls and sips at her drink before staring blankly at the legs of the table.

When Grace enters the room with a peppy voice and bouncy hair, Adrian doesn't look up at her right away. "Adrian, hey." It's the second time today someone's had to bring her out of her thoughts.

She blinks but doesn't look at her.

Grace comes up and puts a hand on her friend's shoulder. "Do you want to come and dance?"

Adrian looks up, smiles weakly at the girl, and shrugs. "Not right now. My friend tequila and I are spending some quality time." She takes a swig.

Grace looks at her, slightly concerned, but doesn't want to press her. "Well, come out when you're ready. We'd all really like to dance with you. It's a fun party." She looks at Adrian and bites her lip. "That looks good. Can I try it?"

"Mmhmm, go for it," Adrian says, pushing the glass over to her direction, leaning her head on her hand.

Grace stares at the blue liquid and presses the glass to her lips, taking a couple of drinks. "That is good."

"Yeah, as far as alcohol goes, it's not bad." Adrian just shrugs. She's pretty unimpressed as far as alcohol is concerned, but she likes a couple of drinks every now and then to numb the emotional pain and let loose a little bit.

"Do you want to come over, after the party?" Grace asks.

"Eh, I'm gonna stay home. Not really feeling this party so I may head out soon. You're welcome to come crash at my place though if you want."

"Of course!" Grace smiles. "One dance before you leave?"

Adrian rolls her eyes. "Yeah, yeah. Be there in a bit."

"Great." Grace leaves the room and Adrian goes back to her drink, downing the last of it. One drink is enough to send a rush of warmth through her blood. Tipsy, her head buzzes with the feeling. She walks over to the sink and washes her glass out, setting it aside.

One step into the room, the loud music thumping in her eardrums, and she turns away when she sees Grace dancing with a boy. She figures the girl has probably already had a few anyway and won't think much of her not keeping her promise.

The cool night greets her as she slips out the back door, the music growing fainter.

Her purse is thrown around her shoulder and she holds it tight around her, pepper spray and a pocket knife in her back pocket.

During those many months of grieving, a grief which has never left her heart, she took up running and kickboxing, some karate, and basic self defense.

Who knows when she could need it.

Expect the unexpected.


Grace knocks on her door later that night and Adrian opens the door to greet her intoxicated friend. "Hi, Adrian! So good to see you! I never saw you out on the floor, did you find someone to dance with?" Adrian steps aside and Grace kind of sways as she walks into the room. Adrian raises her eyebrows, not used to seeing her friend like that.

"Yeah something like that," Adrian says dismissively. "You okay?"

"Yeah, terrific!"

"Okay!" Adrian mocks in a fake peppy voice.

Grace grins and looks down at her shoes. "I was kind of hoping to dance with you. I didn't see you."

"Well, there'll be plenty of other parties." She pauses, and sees that Grace looks kind of hurt. "I'm sorry. I just wasn't feeling the party, I guess. I'm glad you came over."

Adrian can smell the alcohol on Grace's breath when she steps closer to her and wraps her arms around Adrian's neck. They stand like that for a bit, just looking at each other. Grace hesitates then leans in and kisses Adrian on the mouth. Adrian, startled, recoils but then relaxes into Grace's arms, putting her arms around her waist. Grace pulls her body closer and embraces Adrian, her mouth at her neck.

Before Adrian knows it Grace is pressing a kiss against her neck, peppering kisses down the exposed flesh of her shoulder. "Grace," Adrian warns, slightly out of breath. "Do you know what you're doing?"

There's a pause, and she stills her lips, bringing her head up to face Adrian. "Of course."

Grace continues. "I just, I'm really confused. Because you're my best friend, but I want to kiss you."

Adrian smirks softly and looks at Grace patiently. "You like guys, but you like girls too. That's okay." Adrian nods at her friend. "You want to explore the new feelings you have. I get that."

"Do you?"

"I mean," Adrian pauses. "Kissing you isn't horrible," she teases, smiling. "But you're my best friend, and I don't want to do anything to jeopardize that."

Grace smiles back and looks like she's going to say something but doesn't. "Look, if you still feel this way in the morning, we'll see about... what we should do." Adrian isn't oblivious to the hopeful glimmer in Grace's eyes. "For now I really think you should get some sleep. I know I need to sleep."

Grace nods. "Okay. You're right."

Adrian sees the sleepiness in Grace's eyes. She stays up reading when Grace crashes in Adrian's bed, and Adrian comes to bed a couple hours later, careful not to wake her, though Grace seems to be in a deep sleep.

In the morning, the sun peaks through the curtain and Adrian blinks her eyes open, squinting as she opens the curtains and looks out at the new day. She takes a deep breath. Saturday.