A/N Well here it is, my first chapter of the epic tale of Severus Snape's life!
Severus Snape was sat all alone in his dorm. Had he really just done what he thought he'd done? Yes he and Lily had been fighting a lot lately, but that did not excuse him calling her that awfulname. Nobody deserved to be called that, nobody at all, let alone her – she was the most clever, most lovely, most beautiful witch, he had ever had the good fortune to meet.
Why oh why had he called her that – had he really just destroyed his one and only bright light in a world full of darkness and despair?
"She'll forgive me, I know she will… she's always been there for me, why would this change anything?" he thought, though he couldn't help but doubt himself, had he really gone too far?
It was nearly curfew but Severus decided that it would be much better to go and talk with her now, rather than wait until tomorrow.
"Who knows what her 'friends' are telling her," he thought, as he marched down the staircase and out of the portrait hole.
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It didn't take him long to reach the seventh floor, he knew that he couldn't get into Gryffindor tower as he didn't know the password. The only choice he had was to wait for one of the Gryffindors to come and open the portrait for him.
Nearly ten minutes passed before somebody came along the corridor and approached the portrait of, as Snape called it, 'that ridiculously fat woman.' As they drew clearer, he realised that it was Remus Lupin – the Werewolf. Not wanting to be seen, he withdrew into the shadows.
"Hey, Remus, wait up!" Severus looked around quickly and saw that it was Mary MacDonald, Lily's best friend.
"Hello Mary, how's Lily feeling?" said Lupin, a serious expression on his tired looking face. Severus couldn't hold in his snort. Lupin and Mary both looked around, so Severus stepped out from his hiding place.
"And why would you care how Lily feels, Lupin?" he sneered.
"What do you mean by that, Snape?" replied Lupin, confusion etched upon his face.
"I don't recall you caring about anyone else, when you have your little trips through the grounds once a month with your friends?" Snape practically spat. Mary looked up in interest, clearly wondering what he meant by those words.
Lupin's face paled, "I think I'm going to go to bed, see you tomorrow Mary."
"Goodnight Remus," she replied. Lupin muttered the password and climbed on through, the portrait closing behind him. "What do you want, Snape?"
One glance at her look told him that she didn't want to talk to him at all. "I need to talk with Lily –"
"She doesn't want to talk to you!" she hissed, cutting him off before he could finish.
"Go and get her, I know she'll listen – I didn't mean – I –"
"She said to tell you no – no mater what you say! She doesn't want to talk to you!"
Snape hesitated a little before saying, "If you don't go and get her, I'll – I'll stay here all night – I'll go to sleep right here, please –'
Mary, surprised by Snape's obvious desperation, turned round without a word and walked through the portrait hole, not once glancing back at him.
"What have I done, why is she being so stubborn…" he thought sadly. "Might as well stay here, don't want to go back and see Avery and Mulciber, they're just going to laugh at me…" He sat down on the floor, back where he had hidden earlier. "Please Lily, talk to me," he thought desperately.
Then, without warning, the portrait of the Fat Lady slammed open. There stood Lily Evans, wearing a dressing gown, one glance up at her face told Severus that she had been crying, though right now she had a face of thunder with her arms crossed squarely across her chest.
"I'm sorry," he said, as calmly as he could, given the circumstances.
"I'm not interested," she replied, staring at him in the eye, with a coldness he had never seen before.
"I'm sorry!" he cried, realising that this apology was not going to be as easy as he had anticipated.
"Save your breath." Again she had that look of deep disgust on her face – it scared him more than anything in his life. He had been through a lot at home, but those things he had gotten used to, he had always been able to rely on Lily for support – this time he was on his own. "I only came out because Mary told me you were threatening to sleep here."
"I was. I would have done. I never meant to call you Mudblood, it just –"
"Slipped out?" There was no pity in Lily's voice. "It's too late. I've made excuses for you for years. None of my friends can understand why I even talk to you. You and your precious Death Eater friends – you see, you don't even deny it! You don't even deny that's what you're all aiming to be! You can't wait to join You-Know-Who, can you?"
"I don't care about that, I care about you – they can go to hell for all I care – I want you to see me like I see you," he thought, "I so want to tell you but, how?" He opened his mouth, but closed it without speaking.
"I can't pretend any more. You've chosen your way, I've chosen mine." She had that look that told him she wasn't going to change her mind – Snape knew from experience that once a Gryffindor had their mind set on something; they were never going to change it, no matter what was said.
'No – listen, I didn't mean –' he tried to explain, as she had so obviously misunderstood his silence for an admission of what she had just accused him of, when in reality he was not set on anything, except the fact that he couldn't, just couldn't lose her like this.
While he continued to struggle for the right words, she cut across him, "What you didn't mean to call me a Mudblood? But you call everyone of my birth Mudblood, Severus. Why should I be any different?"
"Tell her now! Tell her you Love her! Do it now, before it's too late – quick she's going to go!" He struggled on the verge of speech, but with a contemptuous look she turned and climbed back through the portrait hole.
"Noooooo!! Lily – I – I love you!" he whispered, praying that she had heard him. After a minute or two, he accepted that she hadn't heard him and his heart sank. "There's no way she's going to come back out tonight – I might as well sleep here and talk to her in the morning…" that was his last thought before curling up on the hard floor and going to sleep.
A/N Thanks for reading chapter 1. As you could see, some of Sev and Lily's interaction is from 'The Prince's Tale' I have simply added in more information, as it is from Sev's point of view… I hope it's believable!
Read it and tell me what you think – be honest, I don't mind if you love it, hate it or whatever, just give me some feedback please! I hope to keep updating the story as it comes to me – I am really in the mood at the moment!
