Brian Zane sits in his office with Jason Sabre across from him.

"Thank you for coming to my office." Brian said with his blazer over his SSW Forever Shirt.

"This isn't a office. This is the men's restroom." Jason said, before the camera pans out to reveal Brian Zane sitting on a urinal with his pants down as Jason stands up. "Also, you're not supposed to crap on those."

"I was the former owner of FZW! I don't follow the rules." Brian shouts at Sabre.

"Former…" Sabre notes.

"Yes Jason. It is time for me to retire." Brian said, before standing up and pulling his pants up without wiping.

"I thought you were already retired. We haven't had a show in forever." Jason said

"I know. I can't afford it. FZW brings in no money at all. But you...you have a lot of money. ACW is a money making machine. So I'm giving you the keys to FZW." Brian said, before handing Jason a set of keys.

"What are these the keys for? There's no arena for FZW." Jason said

"The ring in FZW is in a storage closet at Grace M Davis High School." Brian said.

"Where the fuck is that?" Jason asked.

"Modesto, California!" Brian said

"We're in Los Angeles right now. I'm not going to Modesto for a crappy wrestling ring." Jason said

"Then send one of the boys. You own their contracts, you can do whatever with them." Brian said.

"Why do I have to run this shit show of a promotion?" Jason asked.

"Because you're the World Champion, so have fun." Brian said, before offering his hand.

"You didn't wash your hands." Jason said.

"It's okay, I didn't wipe either." Brian said, before Sabre left the bathroom, ignoring him. Sabre looked at the keys.

"How the fuck did I end up with FZW. Whatever- I'll just use it as a tax write off and do nothing else with the company." Jason said

The next day

"Ladies and gentlemen, this is uh...Ash Meltzer and Freddy Alvarez. We have just gotten news of Jason Sabre becoming the new owner of FZW. This is a huge. It must mean that we will finally have a good show under FZW's banner." Ash Meltzer spoke causing Jason to groan as he listens to the podcast from his car.

"How the fuck did the dirt sheets find out?" Jason says

The day before

After Jason leaves the bathroom, a stall door opens and out walks a little African American boy in a dashiki. He has a notepad.

"Very interesting." The boy said

"Who are you?" Asked Brian

"I am Low Kai. I am a member of LuchaLeaks. I expose the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth." Low Kai said

Present day

"I'm going to kill the mark who did that. Now people are expecting me to put on a actual wrestling show." Jason said.


The scene then transitions to legendary jobber Ray Kiran standing in the middle of a wrestling ring with a microphone. There is a single spotlight on him as the arena seems to be darkened. He raises the mic to his mouth and begins to sing

"I wanna be the very best
Like no one ever was
To catch them is my real test
To train them is my cause

I will travel across the land
Searching far and wide
Teach Pokémon to understand
The power that's inside"
Ray Kiran says before Jerry Buckler pops up in the background with his own mic

"Pokémon, gotta catch 'em all" Jerry said

"It's you and me
I know it's my destiny
Oh, you're my best friend
In a world we must defend" Kiran sings

"Pokémon, gotta catch 'em all" Jerry sings

"A heart so true
Our courage will pull us through
You teach me and I'll teach you
Pokémon!" Kiran sings

"Gotta catch 'em all, Gotta catch 'em all" Jerry sings

The crowd then boos loudly as the lights come on. The entire FZW Roster is seen around the ring embarrassed, before Jason Sabre steps into the ring.

"Sorry about that." Jason said as Ray Kiran and Jerry Buckler take a bow. "Actually sorry about this whole show. This is actually a pep rally, because that's how FZW likes to start new eras. I don't really want to own it, so I don't give a shit and I'm letting everyone do whatever the hell they want while I leave. So enjoy the show"

(FU System by Dale Oliver plays)

The crowd is confused and suddenly you can hear the heat pour in as Vince Russo walks onto the stage. The music fades

"Bro, you don't own FZW Bro. It's a swerve. The paper was signed by a Mr. Sabre, but it wasn't Jason Sabre." Russo said

(Real Bone Master plays)

The smarks go wild as Zack Sabre Jr comes out in his signature UK jacket and tights. Then it turns into boos as he unzips his jacket to reveal a 'I'm a Vince Russo Guy' T-Shirt.

"That's right Jason, I am the owner of FZW!" Zack reveals as the crowd boos him.

"Why are you wearing a T-Shirt and underwear. Dress like you're the boss for fucks sake….actually this is FZW. That's the perfect attire." Jason said

"Whatever. Anyways, my first order of business is to hand over all of FZW's assets to the leader of Russo-Gun, Vince FUCKING Russo!" Zack says getting even here.

"And as the owner of FZW, I am vacating all of the Championships. Brutus Vicious, you're not the Champion of Television anymore bro. Ezekiel Myers, you're not the champion of vanilla midget-weights anymore bro. Unicorn and Sigma you're not the champion of teams anymore bro...and bro with a vag bro. And Jason you are no longer the Champion of international Heavyweights. It's time for a new era….the ATTITUDE ERA!" Russo said

The crowd cheers because nostalgia

"Fuck that 1990's shit." Jason said. "You want this title, then take it from me."

"Fine then bro. It's a swerve. All of you keep your titles, except you Ezekiel, SWERVE. This is a wrestling show for men bro. Not cirque du soleil bro. As for you Jason Bro. You can defend your title tonight against the newest member of Russo-Gun…."

Suddenly the lights go out and when they come back on, Jinder Mahal is standing behind Sabre. Khallas to Jason Sabre! The crowd boos as we cut to commercial.

(Commercial)

Chris Weapon is standing in the middle of the ring with a Microphone. The crowd is booing.

"I know. All this time I've spent in FZW, I've been nothing but a bad person. But that was all just a gimmick. It was a character for heat. I don't believe anything I've ever said. This is not Chris Weapon talking as a gimmick. This is me SHOOTING straight from the hip. I am not a racist. In fact, I love all races and approve of racial equality. On top of that I love the LGBTQ Community. So I would like to come out...come out as a...SOCIAL JUSTICE WARRIOR!"

(Ten Thousand Fists by Disturbed plays)

The Weaponary come out. Omicorn is on the motorcycle. Riding bitch seat on the motorcycle Sigma. Tiger eye is seated in a sidecar attached to the motorcycle. Meanwhile, Ezekiel Myers sits on Tiger Eye's lap. They are about to ride down the ramp, but the motorcycle suddenly stops. After two minutes of trying to get the motorcycle to work, they all decide to get off and just walk down the ring...but it was a swerve, because they had heelys on! Unfortunately they don't know how to do it right, so they all fall down and roll down the ramp. Finally they help each other up and get into the ring.

"Chris Weapon….you're a pussy now!" Sigma said, causing Chris to gasp.

"How dare you! You should not ever use such derogatory language. It's not PC bruh!" Chris said

"Yeah, well, fuck PC. I like Mac!" Sigma said, before hitting Chris Weapon with a mic. The Weaponary then start to attack their former leader, who doesn't fight back. Omicorn then hits a Powerbomb. Tiger Eye hits a Superbomb (Elevated Powerbomb). Then they pick Chris up so Sigma could hit a superkick. As this is happening Ezekiel Myers is running around the outside of the ring in circles until he gets tired. He then sits down. The Weaponary continue to stomp over their former leader's body until…

(Power by Kanye West)

Freddy Escobar and the Monarchy (King Caesar, Dylan Toress, & DJ Kingston run out. The Weaponry clear the ring. Freddy looks down at SJW Chris Weapon and offers a hand. Chris accepts it and is helped up. Suddenly, the two former enemies have aligned.

"Hey Freddy, I think you should use music from a different artist." Chris said

"No." Freddy said, before we fade to commercial break

(Commercial break)

Brutus Vicious is in the ring with the TV Title. Vince Russo comes out with Zack Sabre Jr.

"Bro, it's about time for a match and It will be for the TV Championship bro. Brutus, you don't have the look for TV bro. You're not a draw bro. But your opponent and the newest member of Russo-Gun is though." Vince Russo said.

(Here Comes the Pain by Jim Johnston plays)

The crowd rise up onto their feets as Paul Heymen comes out with Brock Lesnar. But then Paul grabs a mic.

"Ladies and gentlemen, my name is Paul Heymen and I am the advocate for the Beast Incarnate, Brock Lesnar. Brutus, Brock Lesnar should take you to Suplex City right now. The keyword there is should, but he won't. Because Brock Lesnar doesn't work TV Matches. Brock Lesnar is a Pay-Per-View attraction. So I am giving you the chance to give your title to Brock Lesnar." Paul said

"Excuse me bro. I wasn't talking about Brock Bro." Vince Russo said from the top of the ramp. "I was talking about him."

Suddenly Brutus gets hit in the back of the head with a chair. Brock looks up to see Spongebob Squarepants in front of him. Spongebob hits Lesnar over the head with a chair and throws him outside, before pinning Brutus. 1...2….3. Spongebob is the new Television Champion, but it's a swerve!

Because he takes the costume off to reveal…

LA PARKA!

La Parka starts to do his WCW dance as the crowd join along even though he's a heel. Fade to black

(Commercial)

We come back to see JJ Hopkins, Gabriel and Damian Jordan, The Devils Associates around a weird circular symbol. They stand around it holding hands as candle light up the otherwise dark room.

"It is time to summon our horseman of the apocolypse." JJ said, before something appeared in the middle of the symbol….

A Twerking Pennywise the Clown!

"I think you did it wrong." Gabriel said

(Back to the arena)

(Weight of my Pride by Pay Money to my Pain plays)

Jason Sabre comes out with his FZW International Heavyweight Championship

(Sher by CFO$ plays)

The crowd boos as Jinder comes out with Vince Russo, the new TV Champion La Parka, Zack Sabre Jr and for some reason….Virgil.

The bell rings, but before the two can even touch, La Parka, Zack Sabre Jr, Virgil and Jinder jump Jason. Jason tries his best but it's not enough. He throws a punch at Virgil to knock him back, but the other three are on him. He needs help….and he got one

(The Show Must Go On by Three Night Dog plays)

The crowd explodes as Psycho Clown comes out with his awesome guitar. Psycho Clown runs in and starts playing his guitar as fire shoots out. Russo-Gun runs out of the ring, before the fire touches them. Jason gets to his feet and looks straight at Psycho Clown. The crowd on their feet as Psycho offers a hand to Jason, but Jason doesn't shake. The crowd boos as Sabre walks past Psycho Clown, up the ramp and backstage….

But it's a swerve

Jason Sabre comes back out with his own awesome guitar that shoots out flames. He re enters the ring and he looks at Psycho Clown. The two then begin to play their fire spitting guitars together as the SuperUltraMegaPowers have united in the name of rock n roll as the show ends.


A/N: Truly my finest work. You're welcome