I Know You Won't Forget - by dancingdiva108
(Story plot based on A Walk To Remember)
Chapter 1- Living Out My Life
Dani's POV
The things in life that many regret are the many joys that keep me living. I go through my days trying to have a smile on my face through all my pain. Things get harder as life goes on but some things get easier. Things that get easier for me are realizing that I have a serious problem that is taking me one step closer to a place where many hope I won't go to so soon. It is the place that I read about in my Bible, it is the reason my brain is always on overload, and it is the reason I have hope.
My father is the minister of our church so my family is very religious. I like referring to the Bible every so often to keep myself in check. I have always been very interested in heaven in hopes my mother is looking down on me. My mother was the strongest person I have ever known. She was beautiful with long brown hair that flowed down to her waist and her hazel green eyes (just like mine) were described to me by my father as being "pools of longing and love." She passed away when I was little. I think I was nine. I had no idea that when my dad told me she was never coming back home that I'd see her again one day. At least I believe I will. I hope that is not for a many more years but you never know. Things can change in the blink of an eye.
Change occurs in everyone's lives but many things change too quickly for me. First, my mother dies, then we lose the house to a fire along with all of my prized possessions like my pictures of my mother, switching schools, then my grandparents left to join my mother, now my problem. My problem seems little to me at this point in my life but soon it will grow and my life will change again.
I keep my problem off my mind as much as possible. Instead of moping around the house, I tutor middle school kids in less fortunate towns. I also am planning on joining the Peace Corps and running to the needy in Africa. Things like these make me feel happy and accomplished at the end of the day. I only wish kids at my high school would do the same.
My high school is… interesting. No one cares about working hard but to have relationships and getting into trouble. I have no friends at my school. This is probably because of my religious family and how I must wear skirts to my ankles (which are not hard to find with my height of 5 foot 3) and never jeans. Everyone always makes fun of me, saying I hide in my clothes and my long brown hair. I do not, it is just what my father wants and I always obey my father.
A few at my school have been to jail. In this small town of Waterfall Village (no, there is not waterfall in the town but a ditch where supposedly a waterfall was), rarely does anyone go to jail. Our town doesn't even have a jail. The criminals have to be taken to the next town over which is fifty miles away. I don't mind those kids but it makes trying to get to homeroom on a day when you're running late so difficult because of the sheriff who checks the entry passes. The sheriff is wicked old and extremely slow. Thanks to those kids who have been to jail, this is the first year of 16 years of life that I am not going to be getting a perfect attendance award. Oh yeah, my problem has a little bit to do with that too.
I like Broadway very much. My all-time favorite musical is "the King and I." It is so beautiful. There is a song in it that I love so much and it makes me believe that there are good people in the world and something wonderful waiting for you. It's actually called "Something Wonderful." Lady Thiang who is describing the King to Anna sings it. It goes:
"This is a man who thinks with his heart, his heart is not always wise,
This is a man who stumbles and falls but this is a man who tries.
This is a man you'll forgive and forgive and help and protect as long as you live.
He will not always say what you would have him say,
But now and then he'll say something wonderful.
The thoughtless things he'll do will hurt and worry you
Then all at once he'll do something wonderful.
He has a thousand dreams that won't come true
You know that he believes in them and that enough for you.
You'll always go along, defend him when he's wrong
And tell him when he's strong he is wonderful.
He'll always need your love, and so he'll get your love
A man who needs your love can be WONDERFUL!"
I love that song, it is so…
"Oh, look! How sweet? A Bible. Danielle, why do you keep reading such things? You know that it is only full of rubbish," squealed my useless Auntie Kaikai as I picked up my Bible to clean under it. Every week she comes over on the day that all of my chores are done (Saturday) and lounges around making it difficult for me to even see what I need to clean. If you know me, everything I do has to be perfect, immaculate, and flawless. My OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, not my big problem) is so intense that I sometimes cannot think straight unless everything on my checklist is done. Anyway, Auntie Kaikai always nags me when I clean. You get used to it.
"I believe in in, Auntie Kaikai. I don't believe the stories but I do believe the meanings behind them. It gets me through my days."
"Oh, soon your troubling days will be over. Don't waist your time and energy on such silliness." She always does this. She refers to my pain, my suffering, my problem that I think should die and I do not wish it on anyone.
I continued cleaning without a word in hopes that my father would soon be home from practicing his sermon at the church. He always practices on Saturdays. I don't know why. I think it is because of Auntie Kaikai. Auntie Kaikai is not married and I don't think she has any friends so she likes to come bother her family instead.
Minutes pass and Auntie Kaikai just lies on the couch watching Jerry Springer reruns from the past weeks. I don't think she notices that every time she comes over that I am cleaning and would really like a hand instead of an unusable lump on my couch. Oh well, what are you going to do?
Finally, Dad comes home and Auntie Kaikai goes and pours her heart out to her older brother. I'm so happy that she is my only aunt. My mom was an only child so I am lacking aunts, uncles and cousins from her side. I actually do not have any cousins, not one. I used to feel neglected and a misfit but now I realize it's not so bad. Some people have parents who are only children so they don't even have aunts or uncles. I sometimes feel happy that I have my Auntie Kaikai because someday, probably after I pass, she will have a family of her own. I hope.
Now that Auntie Kaikai is busy, I can get all my work done. Things like that feel great to know.
I spent the rest of my day cleaning and organizing my room and our house. Everything is so nice and clean now but it will never stay that way. Soon I will not have to go about cleaning anymore because of my problem. I went to sleep that night with the feeling of accomplishment. I couldn't wait until Sunday; it's my favorite day.
I woke up the next morning to find my father cooking like he does every Sunday. The usual pancakes and strawberries that I love. I love my father's cooking. If he were not a minister, I would make him be a chief.
"Ooooh, what smells so good?" Don't ask, I say this every Sunday morning, it is part of the Sunday morning routine. I bet you I can predict what he is going to say next. He is going to say good morning to me and end with pumpkin or princess.
"Good morning! There are pancakes and strawberries on the table all set to eat, Princess," he said cheerfully. Did I tell you?
I sat down and began to eat happily in the new day's sunshine. The Sun reminds me of my mother. It was her favorite part of nature.
Every Monday during Summer Break, Mother would pack our "beach bags" and make lunches for the day. She would put me in my swimsuit and we would walk to the "beach." The "beach" just so happened to be in my backyard. Actually, it was a small duck pond with a large Weeping Willow Tree bend over it. Mother would set up her beach chairs and lay in the sun for hours on end with a smile on her face.
I would sit in the sandbox located next to the pond and watch her for a while. I'd get bored pretty quickly because watching a person sit is not as interesting as it sounds. I would make a sandcastle as big as the sandbox. Or pretty close anyway. Mother would always notice my predicament in keeping the castle standing so she'd come and help. Her help is what I prayed for. She knew the best ways to make sandcastles. She promised to take me to a real beach when I was older but it doesn't look that way now. I probably should go see it sooner rather than later because of my problem. When the time comes, I will tell you my problem.
"What are you thinking? You have the biggest smile on your face. I haven't seen that smile in a while," father interrupted. "You're thinking of your mother, aren't you? I know you so well." He did. He knew me so well.
"I'm thinking of our "beach" in the backyard. I miss the 'beach.' I miss Mom." My father's face grew sad. I did not mean to upset him, I really didn't. My mom's death caused so much grief for him that he had to begin seeing a councilor. Mom is always a tough subject for Dad to talk about.
"I know, Dani. I miss your mother as well. She is watching over us, you know. If she were here, she would give you a hug but since she's not, I'll give you one. I think I need one anyway." He leaned across the table and hugged me. Well, at-the-table-touch-me-with-just-his-fingers hugged me. I hugged back the same way. I love hugs. They make me feel good.
