The Last One Left: The Tears of a Woman
I sit here looking out into space, waiting. Waiting for word from Chewie or Lando about Han. Oh, Han, where are you? I force the tears back as my mind returns to Han and our last moments. I just hope those weren't our last moments together. I close my eyes as the memories rush forward. I can still feel his lips on mine, his large hands holding mine. I sigh as I open my eyes. The pain is as intense as watching my home world and all that I had known be destroyed. I did not cry then, and I will not cry now. I know Han loves me, but there are still doubts in my mind. His voice still echoes in my memory. *I know. * Why couldn't he tell me he loves me? I know he wants everyone to think he is a brash scoundrel. But I know he is not. So why?
I should stop this line of thinking and concentrate on the Rebellion. But it just feels like I am the last one left of our team, our family. There used to be four of us, now what has happened? Han is bound in carbinite, on his way to Jabba. Chewie is trying to find him, and is out there in the galaxy somewhere with Lando. And Luke…Oh Luke. It seems like the Luke that I knew is gone, and in his place is this colder one. He looks the same, but his eyes are dark, cold, and blank of emotion. Not the emotion, hope filled crystal blue that they once were. He acts almost the same, but without the innocence, youthfulness, and hope he once had. He lost more then his hand to Vader, he lost a part of himself. He won't tell me what had happened and I know I can't force it out of him. He rarely eats anymore, and the bags under his eyes tell of the long nights when he doesn't sleep. He mostly goes about his duties and meditates. My heart weeps for him the most besides Han. Luke and I were so close, almost like brother and sister, but now that has been cut off. Oh, Luke, why won't you let me help you?
The Rebellion is holding to together, even if some of its heroes and leaders are not. That at least gives me a little hope to hang on to.
You know, I have been told that I can't feel, that I am an ice queen at times. Well, I can feel and right now I am hurting in my very heart and soul, not just for myself, but also for Han, Chewie and Luke. It hurts to feel like the last one left.
I am finally braking down and crying, for the first time in a long time. The tears are not from the ice queen who has no emotion, or the Rebel Leader under to much strain. No, these tears are from a woman, who has lost everything and knows that she will fight to get what she's lost back.
I sit here looking out into space, waiting. Waiting for word from Chewie or Lando about Han. Oh, Han, where are you? I force the tears back as my mind returns to Han and our last moments. I just hope those weren't our last moments together. I close my eyes as the memories rush forward. I can still feel his lips on mine, his large hands holding mine. I sigh as I open my eyes. The pain is as intense as watching my home world and all that I had known be destroyed. I did not cry then, and I will not cry now. I know Han loves me, but there are still doubts in my mind. His voice still echoes in my memory. *I know. * Why couldn't he tell me he loves me? I know he wants everyone to think he is a brash scoundrel. But I know he is not. So why?
I should stop this line of thinking and concentrate on the Rebellion. But it just feels like I am the last one left of our team, our family. There used to be four of us, now what has happened? Han is bound in carbinite, on his way to Jabba. Chewie is trying to find him, and is out there in the galaxy somewhere with Lando. And Luke…Oh Luke. It seems like the Luke that I knew is gone, and in his place is this colder one. He looks the same, but his eyes are dark, cold, and blank of emotion. Not the emotion, hope filled crystal blue that they once were. He acts almost the same, but without the innocence, youthfulness, and hope he once had. He lost more then his hand to Vader, he lost a part of himself. He won't tell me what had happened and I know I can't force it out of him. He rarely eats anymore, and the bags under his eyes tell of the long nights when he doesn't sleep. He mostly goes about his duties and meditates. My heart weeps for him the most besides Han. Luke and I were so close, almost like brother and sister, but now that has been cut off. Oh, Luke, why won't you let me help you?
The Rebellion is holding to together, even if some of its heroes and leaders are not. That at least gives me a little hope to hang on to.
You know, I have been told that I can't feel, that I am an ice queen at times. Well, I can feel and right now I am hurting in my very heart and soul, not just for myself, but also for Han, Chewie and Luke. It hurts to feel like the last one left.
I am finally braking down and crying, for the first time in a long time. The tears are not from the ice queen who has no emotion, or the Rebel Leader under to much strain. No, these tears are from a woman, who has lost everything and knows that she will fight to get what she's lost back.
