EARTH'D up, here lies an imp o' hell,
Planted by Satan's dibble;
Poor silly wretch, he's damned himsel',
To save the Lord the trouble.

-Robert Burns '478. Epigram on a Suicide'


To: quillsh

From: n

Subject: found him

Mr. Wammy,

I found L. He is fine – we are both safe, though he wishes for our location to remain undisclosed. I find myself inclined to agree with him. I trust that you will dispose of this email properly upon reading it.

A's suicide affected L in a profound way. He won't admit it, but I think he's traumatized. I hope you will allow him ample time to recover. In the meantime, I will stay with him, and make sure he is safe and healthy.

We are staying at a hotel. I must take the liberty of asking you not to freeze L's bank account. I am sure he has a contingency plan should his money run out, but it will be easier for him to know he has access to funds should he need them.

I am very sorry to have run away, but I'm sure you'll understand upon reading this email that L's well-being is far more important. I will send you regular status updates, and we will return when he feels he is able.

Regards,

Near


The glass of the bus window was cool against L's forehead. He closed his eyes, gripping the flimsy paper ticket tight in his right hand. The engine started. Vibrations pulsed through his skin and body. Voices reverberated around him. Somebody laughed.

A small body crawled into the seat next to him.

"How far are you trying to go?"

L opened his eyes wearily. He knew that they were going to attempt to stop him. He had just hoped it would have taken a little longer than this. "Stay out of this, Near."

"No," the child responded simply. "By the way, I wouldn't try to kick me off the bus if I were you. The operator thinks I'm your younger brother."

"Of course he does."

"I told him you have my ticket."

"I don't."

"I do." The albino child produced a paper ticket, identical to L's, from his pocket. He placed it on the older boy's lap. The bus began to pull out of the station.

"Fine," L said resignedly. He leaned his head back against the window without moving to pick up the ticket.

"So where is it?" Near asked, leaning back in his seat. "France? Germany? Russia?"

"The ticket says Edinburgh, does it not?"

"The L I know wouldn't rely on just a bus. You're going somewhere else."

L huffed, starting to get annoyed. "Wouldn't you like to know," he muttered.

"I would."

"Too bad. Figure it out when we get there."

"Fine by me." Near settled in, pulling a pair of action figures from the fold of his pocket. "Oh, I almost forgot," he said, pulling a third item out of his pocket. It was a granola bar. "This is for you."

L looked at it. "I'm not hungry," he whispered.

"I know. Take it anyway." Near set it onto the older boy's lap, next to the bus ticket. "You don't have to eat it now."

L picked up the two items and placed them in his knapsack under the seat. His movements were slow; he felt like his limbs were submerged. "Thanks," he murmured, not looking at his companion.

Near nodded, his attention focused on his action figures. The engines hummed steadily somewhere under the bus. London began to melt away around them.

"I don't have a destination after Edinburgh," L confessed. "It was just the first bus with an open seat."

"Do you want to go somewhere after Edinburgh?" Near's eyes met L's for the slightest hint of a moment. "Now that we're going, we may as well make a trip of it."

"Not really. I just… needed to leave." He pressed his forehead against the glass again. "Does that make me weak?"

Near took his hand after a moment. He placed one of the action figures into it, closing L's fingers around the toy. L looked at it, shifting its weight across his palm. It was dressed in orange, and held a plastic rifle in its plastic hand.

"That depends. I think you're only weak if you decide not to come back."


To: n

From: quillsh

Subject: re: found him

Near,

Thank you for your hard work in locating L. While I am hesitant to allow you to wander so far from the home, I understand the importance of finding L and making sure he is safe. I hope that wherever you are, you will remain out of harm's way.

I deeply regret the events of last evening. A was a tremendous asset to our endeavors, and he will be sorely missed.

I've talked it over with Roger, and we've decided not to freeze L's bank account for the time being. Please take as long as you need. We've deposited some extra money; you will not want for anything. Just make sure that L is safe.

I trust you, Near. Bring our boy home.

W


To: quillsh

From: n

Subject: re: re: found him

Mr. Wammy,

Forgive me for saying this, but I do believe that attitude is why A killed himself to begin with. He was not an "asset," nor was he a tool to be utilized for your benefit. He was a human being and I hope you'll have the decency to remember him as such.

I'm beginning to understand why L wanted to get away so badly.

Near