Prologue

The day my grandmother died, I wondered what my last thought would be. I guess today was my day to answer that question.

Life is never fair.

I knew that too well.

Life wasn't fair to Charlie when ReneƩ, my mother, left.

He loved her so much, he still does, I can see it in his eyes when anyone mentions her.

Life wasn't fair to me either.

I was expected to uphold an entire household when my dad fell to pieces. Since my childhood I taught myself how to live. Not long after ReneƩ left, Charlie became a work-a-holic. Everyday he would leave early and came late. I barely ever saw him.

This year I would have turn eighteen maybe even found something more I never knew I needed. It may have taken me years to get to where I am now. I can't even believe it myself, it feels surreal. Maybe at any moment I'll wake up to realize it was just a dream, but as long as this is my reality I feel the need to say I do not regret any decision, in fact I wish I could have enjoyed them a little longer, but no.

I'm life's clown.

I'm here to fate's amusement.

In fact if there was some kind of higher being, he'll probably had as a mission making sure my existence was miserable, he'd probably make sure I went through this life alone.

Brokenhearted.