Trying to ask myself why I'm starting a new fic when I have like 5 that are still in progress...oh well. I don't really have anyone beating down my door to continue them (not to sound bitter) so new fic time it is! Title from "Landlocked Blues" by Bright Eyes.


"Fuck, Quinn."

"You like that, huh Rach?" Rachel nods frantically, eyes rolling back at the way Quinn's working her over. She meets the thrusts of Quinn's finger with thrusts of her own hips. "Tell me, Rachel. Tell me."

It's obvious to Rachel that there's a part of Quinn that gets off on telling Rachel what to do and ultimately, being rather mean when she does. Rachel doesn't mind.

She's happy to indulge.

"Fuck your fingers are...I can't...I.."

"Aw, you're speechless aren't you?" Quinn mutters in a condescendingly sweet tone, upping the pace of her thrusts. She can tell Rachel is close. "Who would've thought anybody could render Miss Rachel Berry incapable of speech, huh? Guess I'm pretty damn special. Go ahead and tell me how special I am, Rachel. Tell me how nobody else can get you off like I can."

Rachel listens. She always fucking listens.

"No one could ever compare to you, Quinn, I...shit." Quinn sneers at Rachel's desperate mewling. "Can I...can I please..."

"Good job on asking. Usually you forget even that small little rule. Maybe you're not so incompetent after all."

Rachel wonders what she's getting from this. Quinn's undulating against her thigh and slamming three fingers deep inside her and husking demeaning things into her ear and everything just makes Rachel that much wetter.

She comes with a rush of gasps and curse words and Quinn has that damn smirk on her face and-

And then Rachel ruins everything, as always.

"Baby." She freezes as the endearment falls from her mouth.

Shit. Shit. Shit. Maybe Quinn won't notice.

Quinn harshly pulls her fingers from Rachel's center and pushes her away and Rachel thinks fuck, because guess she did notice.

"You always have to fucking ruin this." Quinn removes herself from Rachel's bed and runs her fingers through her long, fair hair angrily. The fingers that aren't dripping with Rachel. "I told you...I...Jesus."

"Quinn, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. Quinn." Rachel's scrambling for explanations and forgiveness, sitting up and immediately covering her heaving, naked chest with a blanket. Quinn's chest is equally heaving but the difference is that she's clothed and Rachel is not.

That's always the way it is.

"Please stay."

"So you can what, Rachel, try and cuddle with me again?" Quinn's voice is so disdainful and mocking that is breaks Rachel's heart. She'd never let the cheerleader know but that's one of the things she wants the most, even more than the sex they have; she just wants to be able to hold her.

Rachel hesitates. "No, no of course not. That's such a stupid thing to say Quinn, we don't cuddle-"

"Damn fucking right we don't," Quinn hisses, nodding in agreement. Her eyes are widened and almost frantic, and if Rachel didn't know any better she'd say the girl was frightened.

Rachel stares down at her hands folded in her lap and feels unexpectedly small. What's not unexpected however, is the feeling that she's so completely beneath Quinn. She should probably get used to this.

This is the worst part; Quinn's blatant denial when it comes to anything that resembles feelings, Quinn's unsubtle reminders that all Rachel is is a quick fuck and that's all she'll ever be. Rachel closes her eyes tightly before she looks back up, pain completely concealed.

She's always been, if nothing else, a superb actress.

"Listen to me, Berry." The voice has that HBIC tone fixed firmly in place and Rachel would be lying if she said it didn't make her throb.

Quinn leans over the bed, harsh eyes level with Rachel's and faces inches apart. "You know what this is to me, to us. And we're keeping it this way. Got it?"

Rachel swallows and nods, watching as Quinn turns to leave, perfectly curled ponytail bouncing. The blonde stops and then turns and glances at Rachel. Her eyes are still cold but they soften just a little, and once again Rachel foolishly believes there's hope.

"I'll...see you at school."

Rachel half smiles and watches Quinn leave, just like all the other times.

She starts wondering when she became reduced to this, to an insecure little girl who lets Quinn Fabray bully her both inside and outside the bedroom and likes her for it.

To a hopeless girl that thinks about said Quinn Fabray every second of every day and wishes that someday, this won't be such a shameful, dirty secret.

The ringing of her phone pierces through the silence and she glances at the display, sighing before answering.

"Hey."

"Hey baby. Can we talk?"

Rachel closes her eyes. No.

"Sure, Finn."