Prologue: Summer before fifth year, number 12, Grimmauld Place.

Sirius sat staring at the ceiling, tossing a muggle ball from hand to hand. He hated this room. The overzealous grandeur of it all sickened him. From the velvet drapes to the scratchy plum comforter on the bed, it made him uncomfortable. He hated just being in this house, being surrounded by all this slytherin and pureblood mania. Nobody loved him here. Nobody cared about him here. These people were his family, why couldn't they love him? Was it because they couldn't? Or because they wouldn't.

Future time: two years after graduated

Sirius looked down at her, her limbs splayed out across the cold black and white marble. Her black hair had come out of its usual plait, and was in frenzied disarray. Her brown eyes were still open and had an expression of terror in them. She was cold. Limp...dead. He dropped to his knees beside her, and brushed his lips over her eyelids.

"I love you, Marlene," he whispered, pressing his head to her heart, tears breaking through. The one person. The one single, solitary person who had loved him, who would die for him, who would do anything for him, was gone. It just wasn't fair.

He clutched her clammy hands in his and sobbed, pressing them to his cheeks.

"How could you do this? How could you leave me alone? I can't live without you!" he screamed into the open night air, the sound echoing. But it was no use. She couldn't hear him. he would never feel her caress his cheek again, he would never feel her lips upon his again...he brushed her slightly bulging stomach with his hand, he would never see his daughter. But it wasn't a waste. He had learned to love, learned that he could be loved. Marlene...Marlene...he thought, but as he sat, staring at her unresponsive face, he knew that nothing could hurt this much, and what the use was to love when it caused you so much pain.

--

Present time: Potter Manor, summer before seventh year.

"And Sirius Black scores as he lobs the quaffle through the ellusive hoop, with time to spare! An amazing shot!" Sirius zoomed around the expansive green yard, a grin on his face.

James laughed from the other side of the makeshift quidditch pitch, "All right padfoot, you got past me, so what? It was a lucky shot!"

Sirius gasped, and shot towards James like a bullet, "Take that back, Prongs! It was excellent, and you know it!"

James, who had to roll over in the air to avoid him, rolled his eyes, "Yes, yes. All hail the great Sirius Black!" he grabbed the quaffle from Sirius and threw it at his head, "Maybe you should be chaser instead of me, Padfoot!" he called as the quaffle collided with his head, with a thunk, "You obviously can't be beater anymore, as you can even dodge a quaffle!"

Sirius massaged his head, "That wasn't cool, Prongs!"

James flew over to the other side of the yard, laughing, "Then why don't you come teach me a lesson, huh, Paddy?"

"I will!" Sirius dropped the quaffle, and as it plummeted to the ground, took off after James, his wand out.

"Boys!" Jane Potter came out of the house to see her son, and her ward hexing each other in the air, "Come down here at once!"

The two of the landed and walked towards her, and stood shamefacedly before her, James covered in mini tentacles, and Sirius legs in a frenzied tap dance.

"Aren't you supposed to be packing?" asked Mrs. Potter, her eyes narrowed.

"Yes, mum." James walked into the house, followed by Sirius who murmured, "Yes, Mrs. potter."

They walked through the manor, until they got up to their rooms.

Sirius sighed as he looked at the mess spread out around his room. He lifted his wand, and swept it around the room, and everything flew up and fell into a jumples mess inside his trunk.

Grinning he went over to James's room, "Done packing. You?"

James was sitting with his back towards him, silent as a tomb.

Sirius frowned, "James? Are those tentacles not coming off? Don't be mad, mate!"

James shook his head, "Nah."

Sirius's frown deepened. He went over to look at James's face. He was hunched over, sitting on the edge of his bed, staring at a picture that depicted a young red-haired teenage girl with striking green eyes, smiling up at the camera.

Sirius sighed. Of course. He sat down next to James on the bed, "James?"

"Yeah?" asked James, absentmindedly.

"Where'd you get that picture of Lily?"

"Mmm," he closed his eyes, "Peter...peter took...told him to..."

Sirius laughed, "Stalker much?"

James suddenly seemed to realize that Sirius was sitting next to him, he looked up at him, his eyes shining, "Look at her, padfoot! Isn't she beautiful?"

Sirius wrinkled his nose at James, "You're a moron."

James didn't answer, but just continued to stare forlornly at the picture, so Sirius walked out of the room, rolling his eyes. He closed the door to James's room, and leaned against it, shaking his head. James was his best friend, but Sirius would never understand his endless obsession with Lily. He had never felt like that about anyone. Love. It was a funny word. It didn't really mean much to Sirius. He had been with lots of girls, but he had never felt about any one of them the way James seemed to feel about Lily. Maybe because he had never experienced love. Sirius shook his head. That was just crazy talk. Of course he could love. Or could he?

--

James and Sirius made their way through the crowded platform, laden down with heavy trunks and owls.

"Potter!" The two of them turned to see Lily Evans looking annoyed. It seemed James had just rammed into her.

He grinned, "Hey, Evans. Sorry 'bout that, it was wrong of me."

Lily raised an eyebrow, and waited, her foot tapping. When nothing came, she looked up at him in surprise, "What? You're not gonna say something like-" she deepened her voice in a crude impression of James, "Oh, Evans, let me make it up to you by going on a date with you...?"

James frowned, "Nah, Lils, that's kid stuff. I'm over trying to annoy you."

An expression of shock crossed Lily's face, and James, grinning, tugged Sirius along, to get on the train.

"Remus!" Sirius ran over and hugged the tall, scrawny, sandy-haired boy.

Butterflies errupted in Remus's stomach, and he looked up at Sirius, his eyes searching, "Hey, Padfoot." But Sirius had already been distracted by two particularly well-figured hufflepuff sixth years crossing their path.

Remus sighed and looked over at James, "How was your summer, Prongs?"

James shrugged, "Can't complain. Padfoot nearly drove me insane with his insisting he's better at quidditch than I am."

Remus laughed, "I'd expect that. Come on, let's get on the train and look for Wormy."

They boarded the train, and Sirius followed them, having secured one of the girls' names.

James turned to leave, but the rest of them stopped him.

"Where're you going, Prongs?" asked Peter, a frown upon his face.

James shrugged, "I have to go to the Head's compartment," he paused, and adorned an expression equivalent to that of being hit by the ray of purest sunlight, "And see Lily."

He left and the three remaining boys went to find an empty compartment.

"In here!" called Remus to Sirius and Peter.

Sirius walked over and saw if it was empty, "Oh, no, no, no!" He said, shaking his head firmly.

Remus sighed, "Come on. I'm sure Jones doesn't recall a single thing you did to her last year."

Sirius grimaced, "I am not sitting with her."

Peter came up the corridor looking confused, "With who?"

"Hestia" Sirius whispered, a terrified expression on his face.

"Ah." Peter understood now, "Oh come on, there's nowhere else to sit. You can talk to Marlene."

Sirius sighed and allowed himself to be shunted into the compartment by his friends which contained Hestia Jones and Marlene Mckinnon.

Hestia looked up, but Marlene was consumed in writing a letter.

Hestia smiled when she saw them, "Hello Remus, Peter-" her face turned to a scowl, "Black."

Sirius grimaced, "Hello Jones, Marlene."

They sat down and Sirius looked over with interest at Marlene, "Who are you writing the novel to, Marlene?"

Her head jerked up when she heard her name and her long black braid swung up and hit Remus in the face, "oh Remus, I'm so sorry...my boyfriend in London."

Peter looked over at her scrutinnizingly, "Is he a muggle?"

Sirius frowned at Peter, "You say it likes it's a bad thing."

Peter sighed, "That's not what I meant at all. I was just wondering, if he's a wizard, why he isn't coming on the train with us."

Marlene smiled, "He's not a muggle. Sturgis graduated already, he's an auror."

Sirius squirmed and looked out the window, "Older man, huh?"

She laughed, "Only by three years. And he behaves like such a little kid that the age difference doesn't really show."

Hestia looked over at Sirius with narrowed eyes, "Why do you care so much, Black?"

Sirius sighed, "I don't, Jones, just making conversation and being polite, something you seem to not be capable of."

Hestia snarled at him, "You have no business telling me what to do after what you did to me last year."

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Are you ever going to forgive me?"

"No." she said, opening a magazine and ignoring him.

"So," said Remus trying to distract them, "Can you think of the fun Lily and James must be having right now all holed up in the Head's compartment?"

Marlene laughed, "We'll be lucky if they don't murder each other."

Sirius got a faraway look in his eyes, "Can you imagine them ever being friends?"

Hestia laughed out loud at that, "Never."

Peter smiled, "Who knows? Maybe they are getting along. James's a lot more mature this year. Anything could happen."

--

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a/n: hope you like it so far! To those of you who have read my other fanfic, Because of Course, I promise it won't be too much like that. Please R&R, and look out for new updates, I might put more on this chapter, or I might make a new chapter.