26th July, 2017 – one shot based on the quote "Loving you is like breathing; how can I stop?"
Marie rolled her eyes before forcing herself to look away from the Cuban she had grown to love. He was sitting at the table in the middle of the squad room as the guys filled him in on the newest case. She stayed silent, partly out of stubbornness and partly because she was afraid of what he would reply if she actually spoke. It had been a mere three weeks since their whirlwind romance had come to a screeching halt, bruising her ego and breaking her heart at the same time. The brunette looked down at the paper she had been taking notes on, to discover that it was now filled with doodles that she didn't even remember doodling. Releasing a deep breath, she flipped to a new page and wrote the address that Carisi had just rattled off, not really caring if it was important or not. She knew she had to focus, but her mind decided that it was okay to drift away once more.
Three Weeks Previous…
"The two of you have been together for over a year now." Marie shot a small glance out of the side of her eye, towards her boyfriend, trying to see if he knew where his mother was going with this conversation, but received no indication that he was paying attention to anything but his mobile phone. "When is the wedding? When can I have grandbabies?" That definitely got his attention, if the sharp intake of breath was anything to go by.
"Mami, no."
"What, Rafi? I have a right to know what is happening in my mijo's life. And you're not getting any younger."
"Mami, no. We're not getting married."
"You can't have children before marriage. It isn't right."
"We're not having children and we're never getting married. Now, stop it, mother." The harshness of his voice caused even Marie to flinch, as realization dawned on her that he had basically said that their relationship was going nowhere.
Marie's voice was timid when she finally broke the silence that had enveloped their table, "So, that's it? We have no future?"
"Rie, of course we do. It's just that my future does not include children or marriage."
He went to take her hand, but she moved it quickly under the guise of tucking a flyaway strand behind her ear, "What if my future does?"
"Then I'm not the one for you." Rafael stopped then, as if only becoming aware of what he had just said, before trying to save it, "Why change what we have? We're doing great."
The detective shook her head before rising from her seat, "It's not enough for me. I'm sorry, Rafael." She turned to look at an awkward Lucia Barba, "it was nice seeing you again."
"Marie?" She ignored the pleading tone and walked out of the sparsely crowded restaurant, head held high, refusing to admit defeat to not only him but also to herself.
"Marie." She jumped, before looking around the table, noticing that five pairs of eyes locked on her form. Carisi smirked, "did you notice any discrepancy in his funds?"
"Oh!" She flipped the pages of her notebook back to the research she was doing the night before, overtime was becoming her best friend; especially since it kept her mind off the empty apartment she would return to at the end of the night. Staring at the words in blue ink, she frowned, "Each month he gives over five thousand to an unknown account." She paused trying to decipher the scribbles and the lines connecting each thought bubble, "I was able to find out that it goes to an unnamed company, most likely a start up or cover up, before being disbursed to a girl named Madelyn Wicks…who is fifteen."
Benson nodded at the news, before standing up, "Carisi, you and Hutchins track down the girl. Question her." Closing her notebook, she stood up before rushing to leave the precinct, the Staten Island native right behind her.
Two hours later the duo made their way back in, noticeably wetter as the clouds that had surrounded New York for the past week had finally burst with a torrential downpour. Marie allowed Carisi to enter the lieutenant's office, once her eyes landed on the figure sitting across from the paper covered desk. Wringing her drenched hair into a small waste basket next to Fin's desk, ignoring the smirk thrown her way, before giving up and sticking the shoulder length hair into a messy bun. Flicking her fingers at Fin's face, she giggled as he tried to swat at her leg as she passed him by. She hadn't been at her desk for ten minutes, before Olivia's door opened the man who haunted her dreams had started walking towards her, "Hutchins, walk me to the elevator."
"I'll pass, thanks."
She fought the grin that wanted to come into play when she saw annoyance grace his features. "It wasn't a request." Rolling her eyes, she got up before they fell into step with each other as they walked across the building in silence. The couple was standing at the silver doors before he opened his mouth again, "You have to stop avoiding me."
"I'll stop when it no longer hurts loving you. Now if that's all…" she turned away arms still crossed over her chest.
His next words made her freeze, "you still love me?"
Marie felt her eyes swell up with tears, and she refused to turn around as she admitted, "loving you is like breathing. How can I stop, Rafael?"
"I love you. We work well together and you love me. Why can't it work?"
She spun around almost instantly, eyes blazing with fire as she hissed, "Because you think our relationship has no future. I can't be with someone who doesn't want the same things as I do."
"I do," his voice was quiet, so quiet that she almost missed the admission. His tan hands gripped her paler one lightly, "I do want to marry you. I just didn't realize it until I was faced with no having it. And babies? I'd give you a hundred if you wanted. Have dinner with me tonight? So we can talk." She nodded, a small smile playing on her face. Brushing his thumb across the thick part of her bottom lip, "I'll being seeing you."
He turned away to walk into the opened elevator, her farewell nothing but a mere whisper as they locked eyes until the closing doors blocked them from each other.
