Remembrance

Summary: Alice remembered everything. Alice-centric. J/A. Rated T for language.

Author's Note/Warnings: Twilight and Doctor Who crossover. Canon pairings. Character Death(s). Written in a strange format.

Timeline: Set during the finale of Doctor Who Season 3. AU of Breaking Dawn (there is no Renesmee).

Disclaimer: I own nothing, except the plot.

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Alice remembered everything. She was the only one. Esme, and Carlisle, and Rose, and Emmett didn't remember. Neither did Edward and Jasper. It was just her. She suspected it had something to do with her ability: fluctuating, but highly accurate prophesy.

But regardless of why she remembered, Alice wanted it to go away. She wanted so badly to not remember. But there was nothing in the world that could accomplish that. So she was stuck forever with her memories.

She remembered:

President Winters has been killed.

"These are our friends."

Harold Saxon

Decimation - the selection and subsequent murder of every tenth person.

"The sky is full of diamonds."

A new empire!

War

Run and hide!

Where is my family?

They can't kill us, we're vampires.

Lies

Toclafane

Jasper dies

Fields of missiles

Dead

"Do you hear it; the drumming?"

He's dead

The Master

Jasper is dead

What is a Time Lord?

Martha Jones

Savior

"Doctor"

Stop.

That last was spoken aloud by Edward just before he left the room. It caused him pain, severe headaches, to see those things. Carlisle suspected it was because what Alice remembered actually happened and that something had tampered with everyone's memories. He reasoned that seeing those events caused irritation to the altered parts of Edward's mind.

However, despite the pain, or maybe because of it, Edward would never fully see those memories or understand what it was like. They might share possible visions of the future where their family ended up dead, but Alice had actually experienced it. It was not even comparable.

"Alice."

The only one who could come close to understanding was Jasper, by nature of his gift. She turned to him now and let him enfold her in his arms, grasping him tightly back. Alice knew he was feeling her pain; the anger, and sadness, and loss, and despair. She knew that he felt them as he felt his own emotions, but still he held her and did not flee. He didn't speak any words of comfort, simply kissed her hair gently, humming softly until the moment passed.

Sometimes they spoke about it; other times they held each other quietly; still other times the need for each other was so strong, the need for here, now, safe, love; sometimes that consumed them.

"I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry I can't help you. I'm sorry I wasn't there."

"We thought we were safe. But they can cut us up just as easily as anybody else."

"'Could,' love. They 'could' cut us up. It's over now, they're gone."

"It still happened, Jazz. You still died."

"I'm sorry."


Alice was running, faster than she ever had. Jasper and Emmett were running beside her. And then suddenly Emmett wasn't. She whirled around to look for him.

"No! Just keep going; he's gone now! We can't stop." Jasper grabbed her arm and they continued on.

That's what it had been like with Rose, about a month ago. Rose, Emmett, Carlisle, and Edward had been on a hunting trip. Rose was snatched and sliced by several Toclafane in a matter of seconds. She had been the first to go.

Alice didn't even know if the others were alive. They'd gotten separated. The air was filled with alien scents ever since the Master had taken over, it was impossible to track them.

Weeks passed, and they found Edward, alone.

And then Jasper had been killed in a raid.

And all hope was lost.

Was this what Edward had felt when Bella died? Had he screamed this loud? How many of those fucking Toclafane had he tried and failed to destroy in his agony?

Alice never knew, they didn't talk about it. He held her during her rage-filled weeping, and indulged her self-destructive behavior. But they never talked about it.

Time passed, and Alice settled into the hopeless feeling. The world was bleak and getting bleaker. There was nothing to be done.

Except:

The Story of Martha Jones

A young woman from England travels the world. She was there when the Master took control. She received instructions and is now looking for a way to stop him. She has a weapon that will kill him—

"I thought it would destroy those spheres—"

"No, it definitely is going to kill Him—"

"Doesn't matter, anyway,' – this weapon, whatever it does, it's the key. And she's searching for it. Martha Jones is the only person to get out of Japan alive. She's managed to get into Scandinavia and Tibet. She walks among the people too; she doesn't hide away and out of sight. People have seen her, she's really real. And everywhere she goes, she has a message. She tells the people how to fight. And then she's gone. Moved on to the next town, continuing her journey. I hear she's getting closer now, to the weapon. She's going to save us.

Martha Jones; the name had been circulating for months now. Alice had heard it near the beginning of this mess. She hadn't paid attention then; she had still thought being a vampire protected her and her family from this war. Although, Jasper had had faith in this Martha Jones, oddly enough. Since his death Alice had held on tighter to the legend of this Englishwoman, as if it was the only thing left of him, some part of him that was still alive.

Lately, there had been whispers throughout the barren wasteland that was now New York City. Martha Jones was near.

The night Alice heard her speak, she listened carefully to her story. It was unexpected. Edward was out hunting and didn't spend much thought on Martha Jones, it was just another pipe dream to him. But sitting there that night and listening to Jones's speech, Alice decided to trust in what she said.

That had been about a month before the end of things. Two weeks after the speech, Edward had disappeared. There was no food for almost a thousand miles around thanks to the fields of missiles. She'd had to return to feeding off humans. Going without for so long made her sick the first time she gave in. She had taken to thinking about him often, thinking about help and redemption. What Martha Jones had spoken of was close enough to God for Alice.

She was outside of a bar at the end of things. There were thousands of people around. This many people hadn't congregated since the Toclefane had started terrorizing everyone. She looked at her watch, which was off by thirty-two minutes. She looked at the equally inaccurate clock that hung next to the door of the bar. It was time.

The feeling was palpable.

She had been preparing for a month. So hopeless and so alone. She looked to sky with everyone else and chanted the name "Doctor" as she had been instructed to do.

In that moment, Alice realized she loved him. She loved this man, this "Doctor." In her darkest hour, this Idea had kept her going. He was the closest thing to God she ever would experience; not omniscient, not omnipotent, but omnibenevolent, and that was the important thing. The Doctor would fix things. She believed in him, just as she had believed in Martha Jones.

A feeling of hope and love filled her as she chanted the name "Doctor." The television in the bar, showing static, flickered; Alice caught it out of the corner of her eye. The only time the televisions worked was when broadcasting from the Valiant. The grainy picture showed a man; his face unremarkable and his clothes would have been indistinguishable a year ago. She did not have to ask to know that this was the Doctor, her Doctor, their Doctor. She did not have to ask to know that he loved them, all of the people of Earth. It was a bone-deep feeling that told her. And she loved him.

It was different than the romantic love she had felt for Jasper, and different also from the familial love she had felt for her brothers and sisters, it was a sort of reverent love that most importantly gave her hope.

And then the world was changing and warping around her, and she was moving backwards through time and space. When it stopped she was in a glade outside the house in Forks.

The world looked different; it looked safe.

She whirled around in slight panic, as Jasper emerged from the trees.

"Alice? Are you alright? Why did you stop?"

She ran to him, wrapping herself around him. She slid her hand up his cheek and inhaled deeply to memorize his scent. She kissed him hard before beginning to sob tearlessly. He held her close, understanding what she needed even if he didn't understand why.


Sometimes Alice would sit up on the peak of Mount Ranier at night to think. She thought of the Doctor and his little blue box that she had never seen. She alone remembered the horror of the year that never was. But she alone remembered the love she had felt in those last moments before the backshift. It was not a feeling she could forget. She did not believe that it was a fair trade; one year in hell for one moment of love, but she could not go back.

She did not go often, but on the nights at Mount Ranier, Alice would look for the blue box and the man that she loved. It was only a glance in the grand scheme of things, but she would keep glancing for the rest of eternity.

-FIN

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