I don't own Naruto!!! TT_TT AND DON'T YOU LAUGH AT ME!! ¬ ¬ I have… THE LOG!!!!


The Akatsuki base was quiet for once, after Pein had ordered at least one hour a day to silence. Something about numerous migraines. Anyways, no one made a loud noise between 12 o'clock and 1 o'clock now. Didn't stop everyone pissing off Pein though. You just had to be quiet doing it.

And thus, boredom lead to the great kitchen heist of Monday, the destroyed library of Tuesday, the flooded bathroom on Wednesday and the walking cactus on Thursday. No one ever learned how the cactus started to walk though. All they knew is Sasori was hell bent on denying he made it walk.

And thus on Friday everyone was waiting for something to happen, especially after Pein threatened to nail someone to the wall if he learned who was guilty for what was happening. Tobi snuck out of his room with a grin on his face, bag slung over his shoulder. At the same time Deidara was in the kitchen with a bomb at hand.

Tobi slunk into the kitchen and began to empty the cupboards. "Again, un?" Deidara muttered quietly. Tobi held up a plate and put it into the bag.

"Tobi's going to steal the plates and cutlery!" Tobi said.

"Oh… Nice, un." Tobi giggled grabbing Pein's favorite drink and pouring the salt into it. He shook it until the salt disappeared. "I got chilli powder for Kisame's coke, un." Deidara grinned taking a box out of his sleeve that read 'DO NOT EAT WITHOUT NEARBY SOURCE OF DRINK, XTRA, XTRA,XTR, XTRA, XTRA, XTRA HOT!!!' Tobi grabbed it and put it in the drink, neither noticing the fact the coke had begun to bubble madly until the lid was screwed back on.

"What's the bomb for sempai?"

"It's for…" Deidara looked around sneakily. "Itachi's library, un." Tobi almost squealed until he remembered the no noise rule. "And I got paint for Hidan's Prayer room, un." Tobi began to squirm in excitement. "After Sasori's cactus stunt, I intend to beat him, un." Deidara grinned leaving the room.

#5 past one#

"I'm glad to see at least one day was prank free." Pein started in his God-like voice. "Due to this, I'm giving you all a day off…"

"WHO THE #### PAINTED MY ####ING ROOM ##### ###### ###### PINK!?!?! I'LL ##### ##### ##### THEM AND ######## THEIR GUTS #######!!!!!" Hidan screamed. Pein sighed.

"Never mind." He muttered pulling his water out of the fridge and drinking some. He chocked. "WHO THE HELL PUT SALT IN MY FRUITY FRIENDS WATER?!" He screamed to the Akatsuki members who could be bothered coming to his announcement. AKA, Deidara, Tobi, Itachi, Sasori and Kisame.

"…Fruity friends un?" Deidara snickered. "I didn't know you swung that way." Pein twitched as Kisame pulled out his bottle of coke. "Where did you get the coke from Kisame, un? I've never seen it sold?"

"Imported." Kisame snickered opening the now bubbling drink. He took and mouthful.

"Is it good?" Deidara asked as Kisame ran out the room screaming, holding his throat. Deidara grinned, snickering as Pein twitched. Pein began to make himself a glass of water only to pause.

"Where are the taps?" Pein asked at last.

"WHERE'S THE WATER?!" Kisame screamed in the bathroom down the hall. "IT BURNS!!!!!!!!!" Itachi sighed, pushing his glasses up his nose.

"I take it the kitchen was targeted, again?" he added looking accusingly at Pein.

"Why are you looking at me?! I never asked for this! One day! One day of silence! That's all I wanted! DAMMIT!" He cursed walking out.

"…Deidara, I know you put a bomb in my library. I found it on the wall, remove it and I don't tell him what you did to his door." Itachi said calmly.

"What happened to his door?" Deidara asked in confusion.

"WHO THE HELL PUT SHAVING CREAM IN MY ROOM?!" Pein screamed. Itachi grinned as Deidara stared. No one pranked Pein directly… unless…

"It's a simple prank. Fill an envelope with cream and stamp on it. No proof who did it as well. But Pein knows I don't lie without reason…" Itachi smirked as Deidara stared open mouthed.

"WHY ARE MY SACRIFICING TOOLS ###### ###### ###### PLASTIC YOU #### ####### ######!!!!" Hidan screamed loudly.

"…I'll go get the bomb, un." Deidara sighed sadly walking out of the room. As he opened the door to the library, a bucket of muddy water fell on him.

"That's for even trying it!" Itachi yelled. Deidara twitched silently as Kisame ran past waving his arms like a mad man. Sasori sighed as the sprinklers turned on due to steam rising from the coke and grabbed an umbrella from the conveniently placed umbrella rack. He opened it and growled when he became coated by custard.

"DEIDARA!!!!" He screamed.

"THERE'S #### ##### ######## #### BARBIE IN HERE! A ####ING BARBIE!!!! AND THERE'S A BUTTERFLY ON THE ### ####### ####WALL!!!! I'LL #### ##### #### YOU ALL FILTHY HEATHENS!!!!!!" Hidan finished screaming. He began to sacrifice the enemy known to man, Barbie.

Sasori walked into his room with a sigh, only to have a bucket fall on his head. He pulled it of and a string on the handle dislodged a bag of flour and feathers. He now resembled a chicken. He growled silently before throwing the bucket on the floor as the glue dried. He was coated in super glue, feathers, custard and flour… He looked like a chicken…

Konan walked out of her room only to pause as Kisame rolled past. Literally log rolled. She blinked as he suddenly jumped up. "I NEED A DRINK! I'M DYING…!!!!!" He wailed deperatly.

"Another prank day?" Konan sighed. Kisame nodded desperately as she walked into her room and handed him a litre bottle of water. He downed it and sighed in relief. He blinked and screamed louder. "Oh yeah, water makes chilli powder hotter…" Konan muttered.

That night everyone sat in the living room. Sasori was still feathered, Kisame looked a mix of red and green, Pein was twitching silently, Itachi had green hair from his shampoo, Hidan was waving a rubber bendy scythe as he screamed profanities, Konan herself was fine, Deidara was covered in mud and was in the corner grumbling, Tobi was not wearing a sparkly pink mask, Kakuzu had monopole money instead of actual money and Zetsu was coated in Ketchup due to it being spiked with baking powder and then being shaken.

"I have decided today never happened. The cactus doing the tap dance on the table is not real and tomorrow we shall have a nice, quiet, peacefulday. Ok? Good. Dissmissed." As everyone walked he sat down and glared at the dancing cactus.

"Let's get the garden tomorrow." Itachi whispered to Kisame.

"Let's get that cat that attacks anything moving tomorrow." Hidan said to Kakuzu.

"Let's coat the stairs in soap." Deidara laughed.

"Think he'll learn soon?" Konan asked.

"Naaaahhhhhh."