Disclaimer: I do not own Tomb Raider Anniversary or anything else mentioned in this fic unless stated otherwise. I also do not intend to cause any offence to anyone in any way shape or form; therefore i apologise in advance to anyone who may be offended.
Now enough of my talking; enjoy the story :-)
It was early in the afternoon. World famous archaeologist adventurer and fur fanatic Lara Croft was relaxing in the lobby of 'The Imperial hotel' dressed in her wolf fursuit and reading a book, (well, when I say reading I really mean holding a book in front of her face which concealed a magazine to make herself appear intellectual).
Larson casually made his way over to her and dropped another magazine on the table in front of her which read 'Fur and loathing in Croft manor' on the front cover. 'Now what's a man gotta do to get that sort of attention?' Larson asked in an aroused tone.
Lara glanced at the magazine on the table with disgust. 'Ugh! Those sick bastards in the media just wont leave us furs alone! And if that's the kind of attention you want Larson I hear the producers of CSI are planning another so called 'furry' episode with loads more yiffyness!!! Maybe you could get a part!'
Larson smiled. 'Sounds like fun, but I'm only here to make an introduction.' Larson pulled a satellite-video-link-thingy out of his pocket, pressed the on button and set it down on the table in front of Lara. 'Lara Croft, meet Jaqueline Natla of Natla Technologies.'
'Natla technologies!'Lara thought to herself with disgust. 'Nothing there but a bunch of furverts!!! They're partly the reason us furs got this bad reputation!!!'
Natla appeared on the screen reading a book colourfully titled 'The Furverts Guide To Enjoyable Yiffing'. 'Wow!' Natla said engrossed with her book and unaware that Lara could see her. 'So that's what I've been doing wrong all this time.' Natla glanced up at the screen and noticed Lara; she immediately threw her book away and put on a serious tone. 'Good afternoon Ms Croft. My research department despite being solely concerned with developing new technology to put the Japanese out of business has randomly turned it's focus to dusty and useless relics; and I'm led to believe that if I wave a great big wad of cash in your face you'll roll over, jump through hoops, play dead and find them for me.'
Lara scowled at Larson. 'I'm afraid SOMEONE has misled you; I only play either for sport, cuddles or cookies.'
Natla sighed and produced two bags of cookies. 'Plain or double chocolate chip?' She asked.
Lara raised one eyebrow. 'What kind of a question is that?!'
'Double chocolate chip then.' Natla replied as she put both bags away. 'Now on to business; you and your father wasted many years of your lives trying to track down the Skion of Atlantis. All you needed...'
'Hold on a sec.' Lara interrupted. 'I thought it was spelt 'S.C.I.O.N' not 'S.K.I.O.N'?'
'Not in this story.' Natla replied. 'We changed it to avoid being sued for copyright infringement. Now as I was saying; all you needed was the location of my brothers...err I mean Qualopecs tomb.
Laras eyes suddenly lit up with interest; 'you've found Vilcalalalalabamba?!'
Natla smiled evilly. 'How quickly can you get to Peru?'
Lara was puzzled. 'Hmmm...how long would it take me to walk to Peru? I...'
'WILL YOU JUST GET YOUR ARSE ON THAT PLAIN SO I CAN BEGIN TRYING TO KILL YOU!!!!!' Natla shouted; then having realised what she said, put on a more polite tone. 'Errr...I mean... WILL YOU JUST GET YOUR ARSE ON THAT PLAIN SO LARSON CAN BEGIN TRYING TO KILL YOU!!!!!!...Dam, I need to think before I speak.'
Natla looked up at the monitor on her side to see the words 'Connection lost'. She was so enraged that she didn't notice Lara lose interest and change channel just before she started shouting. Lara was now watching the latest instalment of 'The Funday Pawpet Show' on the internet.
What do you think so far? I know it's a slow start but it'll start to pick up a bit in the next chapter. In the mean time please review and i'll update the next chapter as soon as i can.
