AN: I know, I know, three months and still nothing new for my ToK story. I'm working on it, I really am, I swear! Just not enough, I guess... anyway, until I post next chapter, hopefully next week or so, please enjoy this short humorous story set sometime after Naruto's return from his three-year-old training trip with Jiraiya. It involes all four main Konoha kunoichis, lots of silliness and also some fluff and slight lemon. I hope you'll like it, and if you do, please review. It keeps me motivated and motivated author always means quicker updates. It's a rule!


Let's get his pants!

(…)

(Late morning, living room of Sakura's house, Konoha)

"All right, everyone! We are here today for one reason and one reason only!" Sakura made a dramatic pause, clenching her right hand into fist before overlooking her three sisters in crime with a piercing look. "To acquire Naruto's power!"

"Uh, what are you talking about, Billboard Brow?" asked Ino, sending suspicious look at her life-long friend and rival.

"I thought you invited us because you wanted to show us your new blouse?" added Tenten, looking just as bewildered.

"A-Are you feeling all right, Sakura-san?" Hinata looked the most lost of them all.

"Quiet! Ahem, as I was saying," Sakura carefully cleared her throat, "you all noticed how Naruto got so much stronger when he returned here, right? Didn't any one of you wonder how is it possible?"

The trio of kunoichis looked at each other, then back at Sakura.

"Because he trained with Jiraiya, duh?" Ino started to look quite aggravated.

"Everyone knows that he's one of the Sannin, the most powerful ninjas in Konoha," agreed Tenten.

"N-Naruto-kun worked his hardest t-to get stronger," said quietly Hinata, trying to hide a small blush.

"Dammit, let me finish!" yelled Sakura, causing all other girls to quickly close their mouths. "Yeah, I know that he trained a lot since he left, but we all did! And not just us, Neji did too, Lee did, even Kakashi-sensei and Naruto is still coming up on the top. There's more to his sudden power-up than meets the eye." After another pause, not long enough to be interrupted again, she added: "And I know what."

"Chm. Then tell us, Wide Forehead," smirked Ino.

"Stop calling me that, Ino-pig!" Sakura pretended to look offended for a second before smiling in her most devious way. "It's really obvious when you think about it. The source of Naruto's new power lies in his… orange pants!"

*ahou, ahou, ahou*

"Are you serious, Flashy Front Head?" Ino looked at Sakura as if she were crazy. "That's the reason you called us here, to tell us a fairytale about Naruto's clothes?"

"I can put seals on kunais or shurikens, but I've never heard about anyone using them to strengthen their wardrobe," Tenten looked more contemplative about it than Sakura.

"N-Naruto-kun's p-pants?" Hinata's blush started to grow quite visible.

"Just think about it!" shouted Sakura. "Naruto still goes around in those stupid orange clothes of his! Every single day he wears exactly that! Then he goes away, returns three years later and boom – everything is different, his jacket, sandals, even his forehead protector – except his pants! Doesn't anyone else see the connection between that?"

"Actually, not at all," Ino shook her head.

"If he wore them before, why would they suddenly give him a power boost?" asked Tenten.

Hinata didn't say anything at all, clearly still lost in the thoughts about Naruto's pants.

"That's just it! Tsunade-shisho's ultimate technique is to release chakra from a seal on her forehead where she keeps storing chakra for like decades!" said Sakura, bringing out her ace in the sleeve. "I'm sure that Naruto did something similar, but on a much greater scale! He's probably able to not only store his chakra in there, but also draw on it constantly and it keeps making him stronger every day. Just think about it, everyone knows his chakra reserves are incredible. He probably found a way how to do this on his training trip. A technique like that would make him Hokage in just a few years!"

Looks of other kunoichis started to grow much more interested than before.

"Okay, let's assume you got it right for a change and Naruto really did something like that," Ino folded her hands under her breasts. "But how is that going to help us? A technique like that will be his most guarded secret, he won't give it up for us."

"He won't have to," Sakura's trademark devious smile returned in full force. "We won't ask him for anything, we'll just steal his pants and copy the technique for ourselves. I know everything about seals from Tsunade-shishou, I'm sure I'll crack any jutsu Naruto could come up with."

"S-Steal Naruto-kun's b-belongings?" Hinata looked quite shocked by that proposition.

"Oh, don't worry. We'll return them before he'll notice," calmed Sakura the white-eyed kunoichi. "See? It's a perfect plan. No one gets hurt, Naruto still keeps his secret and we will make top four kunoichis in our village. Imagine all the missions we'll be able to get, all the clothes we can buy from the payment for them!"

"Imagine all the weapons we can forge," added Tenten in a visible excitement.

"Imagine all the boys we can get," grinned Ino.

Hinata's blush simply hardened, her own imagination made it impossible for her to speak it out loud.

"Okay, the plan's decided. And just to make things more interesting," Sakura's smile would put a bribed lawyer to a shame, "let's split and do it in our own way, each of us. We'll think of a way to get Naruto's pants and see if it works. And whoever gets them will get as a prize… uh…"

"How about your perfume?" suggested Ino with a smirk rivaling Sakura.

"What? No way!" Sakura stood against Ino with unbridled fury on her face. "Do you know how much it cost me? It's a limited edition of hydrangea perfume from Flower Country. You can't get them anywhere else anymore. It's priceless!"

"Come on, Sakura, what's one measly perfume compared to Naruto's pants?" Ino kept on her teasing grin, completely missing what effect had her words on Hinata's face.

"… weeell, if I throw in my perfume, then you'll toss in your dancing dress!" said Sakura suddenly.

"You've got to be kidding me!" Now it was Ino who looked angry beyond words. "I wished for that dress since I was five years old! I put my life savings into it. Do you know how many boys danced with me just because I wore it?!"

"If I throw in my perfume, I want you to put in something equally valuable!"

"Your tiny flower bottle can't even shine the sleeves of my-"

"Hey hey, calm down girls!" Tenten quickly separated both kunoichis. "To make things fair, I'll throw in my nail polish, okay? Changes a color just by applying a bit of chakra and guaranteed to stay on even after dozens of fire jutsu!"

"Wow! You will, Tenten? That's great!" Ino looked really amazed by her friend's offer.

"So the only one left is Hinata." Sakura looked at the last girl with a frown. "But what could she put up in the ante?"

"How about that sexy underwear she keeps in her lowest drawer?" said Ino with an innocent smile.

"I-Ino-san!" Hinata's blush was starting to reach a dangerous level.

"Huh? Hinata has sexy underwear?" Tenten seemed quite surprised by that.

"Why would you even buy it, with the way you keep hiding yourselves in pants and jackets?" wondered Sakura.

Hinata's eyes slowly widened as her blush was getting over the dangerous zone right into the zone of a threatening explosion.

"Who cares? We have four bets and a clear goal before us. Hands here, everyone!" Four hands quickly found their way in one big pile. "In the next twenty four hours, one of us is going to win the ante and possess Naruto's pants!"

"Yes!"

(…)

(Half an hour later, Konoha's General Hospital, Konoha)

"Man, what is Sakura-chan thinking, calling me to the hospital? I'm not even injured!" Naruto yawned loudly, barely putting a hand before his mouth. "Besides, it's my day off! I hoped to get some extra shut-eye in the morning. Not even having time for my usual breakfast…" he murmured as he opened the door to the room he was told to go into.

"Stop complaining you blockhead!" A book about a human's anatomy found its target flawlessly and sent Naruto down in an instant. "Here I am, getting worried about your health and offering to do your check-up in my own time and this is how you repay me?! You should be thankful!"

"Awww, I get it Sakura-chan, I get it." Naruto carefully got up, rubbing his nose and putting the book on a nearby table before closing the door behind him. "So what do I have to do?"

"Take off your clothes first, baka! Don't you know what to do when you're at a doctor's office?!" shouted Sakura while grinning inside. 'Yes, that's perfect. Naruto doesn't even have a clue. I'll just have him drop his shirts and pants, then tell him something to get him out – I don't know, like bringing me an urine sample or something – and before he knows it, his pants are mine and the whole ante as well. Take that, Ino-pig!'

"Is this enough, Sakura-chan?"

"Huh?" Sakura woke up from her daydreaming to see Naruto dropping his jacket and shirt on a nearby chair. "Of course not you knucklehead! Don't you know that you have to undress completely when I have to do check-up! You can't take off your shirt on…ly…"

'Did… did he exercise or something?' she thought, suddenly unable to take her eyes off Naruto's chest. Smooth, tanned skin covered much more muscular body than she ever remembered seeing, even at Sasuke. Tight and very distinct curves showed that Naruto was no slouch whatsoever and his stomach looked like carved from a living stone. 'Wow, that looks so – w-wait, I can't get distracted now! Focus Sakura, focus dammit!'

"Okay, how about this, Sakura-chan? Is this enough?"

"Huh? Naruto, I thought I told you that…" 'Oh Kami!' If Naruto's torso and arms looked good, his legs weren't far behind them at all. With just a pair of black and orange boxers hiding the most intimate places, Naruto as a whole suddenly looked much more manly than Sakura ever remembered him to look like. She found out that she had some difficulties in taking her eyes off him. 'Damn, focus Sakura! Take your eyes off him! Think about the prize! His pants, Ino-pig's dancing dress, that sexy under – damn, he looks sexy indeed! I wonder…'

"Still not enough?" asked Naruto, his face full of confusion from Sakura's lack of answer, until it suddenly brightened. "Oh, I see. I should take off my boxers too! No problem, Sakura-chan!"

'W-What? What did he just say? Something about his boxers? What is he… oh Kami!' Sakura's eyes noticed Naruto's behavior much sooner than her brain and her body went on an autopilot, recognizing only a half-naked man in front of her and what was he about to do.

"You idiotic moron! How dare you expose yourself in front of a girl?!" She shouted, reeling her fist backward before striking Naruto right into his face, all her chakra focused into just one single spot.

"B-But Sakura-chaaaaaaan!" Naruto never got a chance to finish what he was about to say as an enormous force sent him flying straight through the wall along with much of the content of the room. He barely had time to wonder what just happened before her lost consciousness from the blow.

"Gah, the nerve of that guy!" fumed Sakura, ignoring surprised gasps from people gathered behind her, staring as she just destroyed a quarter of the entire room with just one blow. "What the hell is his problem?! Mesmerizing a girl with his body and then trying to take advantage of… huh?" She looked around, suddenly noticing the mess she was standing in.

'Oh crap, this really isn't good,' she thought before looking around. 'Ah well, I'm sure Naruto will survive. Now I just have to grab his pants and… and… where are they?'

A realization dawned on her as she remembered what exactly she did. She punched Naruto so hard that she sent him flying along with the table, and chairs, and heavy medical bed… and all of his clothes. Including his pants.

"Daaaaamn!" She whined, but quickly composed herself. 'Okay Sakura, just a minor setback. It just means those pants are down on the street somewhere. I just have to find them and then-'

"Sakura."

The pink-haired kunoichi froze, knowing the voice behind her very well. She turned around as slowly as possible, hoping against all odds that she was mistaken. She wasn't.

"Y-Yes, Tsunade-shisho?"

"I don't know what just happened here, but I expect your full report on this – after you clean this whole mess. Did I make myself clear?"

"But shisho-"

"Did I?!"

There was only one right answer to that if Sakura valued her life.

"Yes, shisho."

(…)

(Lunch time, in front of "Dresses for all occasions" store, Konoha)

"Really, Ino?" asked Naruto in a doubtful voice, staring at the tourniquet in front of him. "You think that new clothes will help me in my training?"

"Absolutely!" chimed Ino as she kept pulling on Naruto's hand, guiding him in her secret kingdom. She knew each and every corner of this building and she spent most of her free time here. She had no doubt that she could find something in here that would interest Naruto enough to try it on – and drop his pants in the process. Grabbing them after that would be a piece of cake.

"But what's wrong about my old clothes?" Naruto still seemed unconvinced.

"They're too one-sided!" said Ino with a steel resolution in her voice. "Every true ninja has variety of clothes for different types of missions! Take me, for example," she proclaimed proudly, putting a hand on her chest, "I have three wardrobes, eighteen dresses and twenty six different pairs of shoes, not mentioning jewelry and accessories. And all that is just in my own room!"

"Yeah, but… you're a girl. Girls are supposed to have a lot of clothes, aren't they?"

"You too! Just be quiet and be grateful that I'm helping you with the stuff you should be doing on your own!" snapped Ino as she dragged Naruto to the part with displayed shinobi outfits. "Here, look around. Don't tell me that something doesn't catch your eye here!"

"Hmmm…." Naruto grumbled, slowly eyeing all the different types of shirts, jackets, bandanas, cloaks, pants, shorts and sandals. "Well, they have a lot of stuff, that's for sure," he admitted.

"Of course they do. It's the best shop in Konoha!" said Ino proudly, then frowned as she saw that Naruto still wasn't picking anything.

'Gah, I guess I'll have to do all the work,' she sighed, took a random pair of shirt and pants and pushed them in Naruto's hands. "Here, try this on. I'm sure that you'll look great in it!" she said in a sing-song voice.

"Are you sure? It looks kind of-"

"Just try it on, damnit!"

"Geez, fine. Don't snap at me, okay?" Naruto shook his head as he disappeared in one of the many fitting rooms in the store. "Seriously, what's with the girls and their weird clothes obsession…" he murmured before disappearing behind a purple curtain.

"There's nothing wrong with us!" yelled Ino after him before turning to one outfit that made her eyes sparkle with excitement. "Just look at this one! The material, the cut, the soft lines around the sides…" she caressed the suit with love, for a moment lost in her own world. She completely missed another customer going in the fitting room just next to Naruto.

"Yeah, yeah, I get it," grumbled Naruto, looking in doubt at his new supposed-to-be clothes before sighing and preparing to take off his shirt. But just as he was about do it, his stomach practically roared with a force that shook his entire body.

"Damn, I forgot! It's lunch time already and old man Teuchi promised me a discount today!" He quickly looked out of the fitting room, only to see Ino with small hearts flying all around her head, staring and touching at some weird dancing dress or something. "Hey, Ino! I'm… oh hell. I'll just go eat and return here after that. I doubt she'll even notice." He quickly put his jacket back on and slipped out of the store.

"See? This is why I love clothes so much! Don't you agree Naruto… Naruto?" Ino finally woke up from her stupor and looked to the fitting rooms in confusion before hearing a muffled: "Damn, this shirt is so tight!" coming from one of them.

'Naruto has trouble putting his shirt on?' wondered Ino before a diabolical plan just popped up in her mind. 'That's perfect! I just slip in, grab his pants and be long gone before he notices! Watch out, Wide Forehead, I'm coming for your limited edition perfume!' As sneaky as a true kunoichi, she slipped behind the curtain without anyone noticing, her hand reaching for the place where she expected the pants to be laying, until…

"Iiiaaaahhh!"

"W-Who the hell are you? A-And why are you touching my-"

"Get the hell off me you pervert!"

"Me? You're the one that got in my fitting room! Get out!"

"I'll get you out you sick weirdo!"

When Naruto returned, after an hour full of hot and steaming ramen, he found only an empty store and an aggravated store assistant who told him that Ino was thrown out after some incident.

(…)

(Two hours later, training area #28, Konoha)

"Uh, Tenten?" said Naruto, cautiously looking around the wide, empty training ground. The only things around were some training dummies and half-broken kunais. "I'm really glad that you decided to help me with my training, but is there any reason you aren't training with your own team?"

"Oh, Gai-sensei proclaimed this day to be 'The Green Day of Youth'," lied Tenten through her teeth, proud at herself for coming up with such a believable lie. "We would all have to dress in that stupid green spandex suit of his and train in it all day. Could you believe it?" she shivered, her own line of thoughts scaring her out of her mind.

"Ugh! Yeah, I can imagine," mumbled Naruto, then happily rubbed his hands together. "So, what are we going to train in? Teamwork? Some new jutsu? Or elemental manipulation?"

"Oh no, nothing as elaborate as that," grinned Tenten before taking out handful of kunais, extra sharpened just for this occasion. "I think we'll get the best result from a survival race!" She didn't waste a second as she threw all of them at Naruto with a deadly accuracy.

"W-Whoa! Wait a second!" Naruto was barely able to dodge them, one of the kunais slightly scratching his cheek. "What's a survival race?"

"That's simple. You are an enemy ninja with a message that you must keep away from me." 'You can call that message your pants if you want to.' "And you have to protect it from me until sunset. If I get you, it's over." 'And you bet it'll be over. I have the sharpest eyes right after Neji and my aim is flawless. I'll cut those pants off you in no time. And if not, by some miracle or whatnot, I'll just tire you out and then take them off you when you're dead from exhaustion. Plenty of time from now on until sunset. Face it, Naruto, your pants are going to be mine!'

"Oooh, I see! Good plan, Tenten! I'll just add to it some excitement then!" grinned Naruto before forming a tiger seal. "Tajū Kage Bunshin no Jutsu (Multiple Shadow Clone Technique)!"

Suddenly Tenten got swarmed with hundreds of Naruto running and jumping away into all possible directions. About a quarter of them was running back to the village while the others scattered deeper in the nearby forest.

"W-What? What's that?" asked Tenten, too shocked to say anything else.

"My part of training!" grinned the one remaining Naruto. "This way, it'll be much bigger fun. See you around, Tenten!" he said and dispelled himself in a poof of smoke.

'T-That's not possible. How can I… no, I have to! I simply have to! My nail polish is on the line!' Tenten grabbed another set of kunais and ran into the village. 'I'll start there and work my way out, but one way or another, I'm getting those damned pants!'

(…)

"Wow! You really gave me a run for my money, Tenten," grinned Naruto after dispelling his last clone. "That was some great training, don't you agree? Uh, Tenten, are you okay?"

'Kami help me!' Tenten lay sprawled on the ground, her hair a complete mess, her clothes dirty and torn from running through the thick brushes and thorny ivy and all her strength drained away from hours of chasing one Naruto after another. It would be bad enough should she need just one kunai to bring him down, but every clone was nimble enough to force her to use around a dozen of kunais or shurikens to dispel him. The sun was slowly dropping over the horizon now and she only managed to catch the clones, with the original never appearing until now. But now she was too exhausted to even lift a hand.

"Here, let me help you." Naruto threw her over shoulder with ease, marching to the village's gate. "I'll drop you home and we can repeat this tomorrow, okay?"

'That's not faaair!' shouted Tenten in her mind, her hands dangling mere centimeters from the hem of Naruto's paints but even then she could barely lift a finger. 'Kami, why are you so cruel?!'

(…)

(Late evening, Naruto's apartment, Konoha)

"Man, what a long day," yawned Naruto, slowly going in the direction of his small home. Tenten seemed really tired, so he just dropped her in her bed and went straight home, not noticing how hungry he became until now. "Damn, just my luck," he murmured, getting up the stairs of the old building where he had his apartment. "I missed the dinner time and Ichiraku is closed already. Ah well, I guess I'll have an instant ramen at home. Better something than… huh?" he stopped in front of his door, his nose catching on a very strange scent, one that made his mouth water instantly.

"Daaamn, this isn't fair! I got robbed of my dinner and someone is cooking a delicious home-made ramen just next to my home!" he whined as he unlocked the door and pushed them open. "My life can't suck any mo – a-aaahh?"

"G-Good evening, Naruto-kun."

Naruto's mind was sent into an overdrive before being stopped by a rockslide. Right in his apartment was that shy girl from Team 8, wearing a long, snow-white apron over her usual jacket and pants, and was cooking on his stove. Something that smelled so incredibly much like…

"H-Hinata, are you – are you cooking ramen here?"

"H-Hai," nodded Hinata, trying to fight with her blush as much as possible. "I… I-I thought you may be h-hungry after your t-training with Tenten-san, s-so… u-umm…"

"Wow, you really made a ramen just for me? You're the best, Hinata!" Naruto was next to her in an instant, grabbing her in a bear hug and pushing the air out of her in one swift motion.

'N-Naruto-kun is hugging me… h-hugging me… d-don't faint, d-don't f-faint…' Hinata was doing her very best just to stay conscious. She thought long and hard, but couldn't come up with any plan whatsoever, especially because anytime she started thinking about stealing Naruto's pants, her mind got flooded with images of what was under them. But when she was about to give up, she passed around Ichiraku ramen and realized what could make Naruto relaxed enough to allow her to start thinking about… that other thing.

And one of the many traits that Hinata didn't tell anyone was that she was an exceptional cook.

"Oh my, I can't believe my luck! This is the best day ever!" Naruto was right at his table, practically drooling while blushing Hinata presented her home-cooked ramen before him. He happily grabbed a pair of chopsticks, separated them with a loud 'crack' and grinned in a way that would make Might Guy cry tears of happiness. "Itadakimaaasu!" he proclaimed as he dug in.

"Oh… oh my, this is awesome Hinata! It's almost better than at Ichiraku!" said Naruto between third and fourth bites, his mouth never empty.

"O-Oh…. t-thank y-you so much for your praise, Naruto-kun." Hinata bowed shyly, very happy that Naruto seemed to like it – and completely baffled when, five seconds later, Naruto gave her an empty bowl.

"Second, please!" he said, a happy grin never leaving his face.

'S-So quick! I n-never thought he would have such an appetite,' Hinata quickly refilled the bow, looking at the stove in worry. She might have to cook some more ramen if she wanted to feed Naruto fully.

"Aaah, I could eat this stuff all day! It's so… hmm?" Naruto stopped chewing for a moment before looking at his temporary cook. "Say, Hinata, did you add any extra spice in that broth?"

"Oh... umm… I-I might, Naruto-kun. Why?"

"Oh, no reason!" he returned to eating in an instant. "Just that I tend to have strange dreams when eating too much of spiced food. But don't worry, it doesn't happen too often."

"W-What strange dreams, Naruto-kun?" asked Hinata. She was mortified – did she poison her secret love without even knowing about it?

"Oh, ermm… n-no strange dreams at all. Really, don't bother about it!" Naruto stammered for a second before quickly returning to the meal before him. Really, he may have no tact whatsoever, but even he knew that some things are better not spoken out loud, especially to girls. Sakura taught him that with an iron fist.

He happily drowned his thoughts in another bowl of ramen… and another… and another…

(…)

"Maaaan, I'm so full. I had… uuhh… how many bowls again?"

"Umm… t-twenty t-two, Naruto-kun," said Hinata shyly, helping him wobble into his bedroom.

"Damn, really? Ouf, you are just… too good a cook, Hinata…" murmured Naruto, his mind and body warm and lazy after so much food. "You'll be a great wife someday…"

'A-A wife!' Hinata's blush returned in full force, she shook her head violently in an attempt to shake it off. 'F-Focus, Hinata, s-stop thinking about that. Y-You still have to… g-get Naruto-kun's p-pants… somehow…'

"Aaah, thanks so much Hinata! I'll take it from here… I think," Naruto simply dropped on his bed before rolling on his bad, splattered like a frog. "Or not… I think I ate too much… need a quick… zzzzz…."

'I-Is he asleep?' thought bewildered Hinata, watching as the blond boy started snoring almost immediately after hitting the sheet. 'I-Is it even possible? H-He just ate all the ramen I gave him and then just… fell asleep?' She kept looking, waiting for Naruto to say something or at least undress, but he did none of that, just kept lying and snoring quietly. 'H-He looks cute when sleeping… a-aaah, bad Hinata, bad Hinata! Stop thinking about that!'

Just when she managed to stop that trail of thoughts, a new one entered her mind. Naruto was asleep, on his bed, sprawled… and so defenseless. Getting his pants now suddenly seemed much easier than before.

'I-I…. I-I j-just… t-take his p-pants and go… I'll return them before morning, m-maybe cook him a b-breakfast to apologize… a-and a lunch too… I-I'm sure he'll forgive me.' An inch after an inch she kept sneaking forward, gasping when the mattress creaked under the weight of her body, but Naruto didn't stir at all. 'Y-you can do it, Hinata, just t-take his pants, p-pull them down and o-off him, and you're s-safe…'

Moving as if in a slow motion, her hands crept upwards, along Naruto's bare feet, then along his pants until reaching the belt. Her delicate fingers curled around the buckle, shaking slightly as they pulled on the loose end of the belt to undo it, before reaching for the hem of the orange pants…

"Zzz… n-not there, silly…" murmured Naruto.

Hinata barely stopped a high-pitched squeak to escape her throat, freezing in her position like a thief caught by a local police force right in the middle of a robbery. She could only wait for Naruto to open his eyes, notice her, call her a freak and throw her out.

Except nothing of that happened even after a minute of a painful waiting in her bent-forward position with her hands holding the opened buckle from Naruto's belt.

'Is… is he still asleep? M-Maybe talking in it?' thought Hinata, hoping against the odds that she could still get out of this safely. She whispered as quietly as possible: "W-What d-do you m-mean, Naruto-kun?"

Naruto just groaned and kept snoring.

'O-Oh, he really is just asleep.' Hinata felt an enormous wave of relief wash over her body, along with another fantasy of how much helpless and vulnerable her love was right about now. Not to mention how clotheless he was going to be soon after…

Shaking her head furiously one more time, she slowly pulled the pants down – then shrieked as a firm hand grabbed her by her wrist.

"… -ot there, dummy…" Naruto snored one more time, his hand pulling Hinata closer even as he kept dreaming.

"N-Naruto-kun, p-please wait!" pleaded Hinata in her shy, quiet voice, feebly trying to resist his pull. Was he always like this when dreaming? Or was this one of those strange dreams he mentioned when eating spicy food? Maybe she should wake him up before something bad would happen. "T-This is a d-dream, Naruto-kun, you have to w-waaaaahh!"

Her eyes almost popped out of their sockets when Naruto pulled her right on him. She failed to suppress a squeak this time as her body was suddenly pressed against him. His chest, hidden only by his loose black shirt, was suddenly pushing against her own, her breasts crashed by the gravity between her body and Naruto. Her legs got intertwined with Naruto's legs, effectively immobilizing her as his hands pulled her into a tight hug. She could barely struggle when she imagined just how exactly she must look – in one bed with Naruto, his hands around her body with his pants halfway down.

"Zzzz… silly girl, hiding like that…" mumbled Naruto, his hands moving over Hinata's back and making wonders in raising her body temperature to unbelievable levels. "… come here, you naughty vixen…"

"N-Naruto-kun, p-please, w-wake up!" Hinata was blushing so much she barely had anything left to fear. Her most secret dreams were being fulfilled in the weirdest ways possible, Naruto's pants and the whole bet completely forgotten as she could only think about his hands roaming her back, tugging on the zipper of her jacket, slipping into her pa-

"N-Naruto-kuun, wa-mhhhp!" Her extra-quiet protests were silenced with a passionate kiss that melted all her defenses away like a chocolate in a microwave.

"… talk too much, silly…" Naruto may have been asleep, but his hands knew all too well what things to do. And they did a lot more that night.

(…)

(Early morning another day, living room of Sakura's house, Konoha)

"I can't believe it!" whined Sakura while using her pillow as the most desirable target to let out her frustration. "Tsunade-shisho kept me in her office for the whole day, making me help her with the paperwork just for destroying one wall! It's so unfair!"

"You're telling that to me?" Ino kept crying a river of tears, hugging her most favourite plushie. "I got banned from the best clothes store in Konoha! I can never shop there anymore! All because of that stupid bet you made, Big Forehead!"

"Watch what you say, Ino-pig! I'm the one suffering here, not you!"

"I have to hide both from my own team and from Naruto today," Tenten just lay on the ground, sprawled and without any energy. "If either of them catches up on me, it's another day full of training and chasing for me. I can't keep up with that!"

Hinata was the only one not saying anything, her face radiant but her whole body emanating happiness like never before. She was really grateful to any Kami that was watching over her that she had woken up before Naruto did and managed, with certain difficulties, to sneak out of his bed unnoticed, her mind completely blank and not interested in any bet at all. There were other things that she was grateful for, but she wasn't going to tell anyone about them. Ever.

"So, I guess this is the end," said Sakura sadly after she managed to break her hold with Ino. "It's twenty four hours about now and no one managed to get his pants." She sighed. "Now we won't know if his pants are really the source of Naruto's power…"

She didn't get to finish the sentence as a pair of orange slacks flew right into her face.

"Oh, really? It looks like I won the bet after all."

Sakura quickly draped the pants out of her face, ready to punch whoever did it into the next week. But the sight stopped her dead in her tracks.

"T-Tsunade-shisho?"

"Tsunade-sama?" gasped Ino. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to find out why I got my desk filled with reports about destroyed hospital property," Sakura hung her head, "kunoichis banned from clothes stores," Ino looked down, "hundreds of Narutos followed by rain of kunais all over the village," Tenten groaned in exhaustion, "and, finally, about dozen or so complains about noisy neighborhood after 11 pm around Naruto's apartment."

Hinata looked mortified and about to pass out.

"So I went right to the source and questioned my favorite blond knucklehead what was it all about. He obviously knew nothing, but I can add two and two together." Tsunade folded hands under her ample bosom and grinned. "And since I guess you four made your little bet around this time yesterday, I still win your whole ante, don't I?"

"B-But Tsunade-shisho…"

"Yes, Sakura?" Two brown eyes pierced right through the pink-haired kunoichi and froze everything that she was about to say.

Without another word, Sakura sadly handed over her perfume bottle, Ino took out her folded dancing dress, Tenten sighed and gave up her nail polish and blushing Hinata presented a wrapped package with her special pink underwear.

"Umm, Tsunade-sama, I don't want to sound rude, but I doubt you'll have much use for Ino or Hinata's antes," said Tenten.

"Don't worry, I'll find a good use for them. Because this doesn't end your punishment at all."

"What? You think that giving up our most prized belongings isn't punishment? What is then?" whined Ino.

"I'll be happy to tell you," Tsunade's evil grin surpassed all of her underlings. She tossed all the antes back to their former owners. "Sakura, you'll use that perfume of yours – all of it! – and work your day in the hospital in it. A whole day!"

"W-What?" Sakura couldn't believe what her shisho asked of her. A whole day, her entire bottle of perfume? Not only it was a complete waste, but she'd have to endure nasty remarks from her female fellow-workers and live through a cascade of pervy remarks from the male side. That was going to be one long working day.

"Now you, Ino. I reached a deal with the owner of 'Dresses for all occasions' store," Tsunade's gleeful look moved to the blonde girl. "He's holding a promotional action to raise sales of his store – free dancing lessons for all customers. And you're going to help him, dressed in that cute dancing dress of yours."

"Y-You can't be serious, Tsunade-sama!" Ino paled and shivered at the same time. Her dress was a masterpiece, a type that both soothed and tantalized at the same time, hiding yet revealing as much of her body as possible while keeping on the border of decency. And she was supposed to wear it all day now and let some greasy villagers molest it, and her, all day? She wasn't going to stand for that!

… after seeing Tsunade's glare, Ino decided that, in the end, free dancing lessons were a small price for her own life.

"Very good. Now, Tenten, you actually made lots of our fresh Academy students curious about all the weapons you kept throwing around. So I made it possible for you to visit all their classes today and explain them in detail what is what. And please," Tsunade grinned again, "if they have troubles recognizing one weapon from the other, feel free to use different colors on each of them. Preferably with your nail polish."

"Nooo!" Tenten couldn't believe that she was punished twice as much as other girls. She loved her weapons and talking about them, but she hated those small brats at Academy. They never understood anything, they were able to confuse kunai with shuriken or bo with bola! And to use her precious nail polish on a crude metal? She wished she'd threw it away before this happened.

"Oh, and Hinata…"

"H-Hai, Tsunade-sama?" The shy girl was now trembling in fear, sure that when left to the end, her punishment was going to be exceptionally cruel.

"You are going to personally apologize to every single citizen who complained about the ruckus last night. I don't really have to tell you what are you going to wear for that?"

"I-I u-understand, Tsunade-sama." Hinata wished to be claimed by the earth and never returned to the surface. Walking between flats and houses in nothing but her special underwear? She was going to faint before she would reach the first one.

"Good." Tsunade eyed all of her students before grinning one last time. "I'll have some of my shinobi personally supervise each and every one of you to make sure you won't try to cheat. But since I'm a bit shorthanded right now, I had to ask around for volunteers. And," she added as she heard knocking on the door, "it looks like they're here. Come in!"

"What volunteers do you…. m-meeean?" Sakura squeaked as she got picked up from the ground in an instant, in front of her materializing a green-clad shinobi with teeth flashy enough to illuminate a night.

"Yosh! It's so great to work with you, Sakura-chan! Let's do our best and make our spirits of youth shine as bright as the sun itself!"

"Man, this is such a drag," complained Shikamaru as he just dropped right beside Ino. "I don't understand why I'm the one who has to do some tiresome dancing."

"You were at least given a choice between this or A-ranked mission," Neji's slightly irritated voice cut through the air as he stood behind Tenten. "I wasn't given a choice at all."

"That's because I know you would slip away at any opportunity," smirked Tsunade, then frowned when no one else came in. She banged loudly on the suddenly closed door. "Hey, come on in you brat! You have a girl here waiting for you!"

"I'm not going in there until you give me my pants back!" shouted Naruto from the other side of the door in both angry and embarrassed voice.

"Shut up and come right in or I'll take the rest of your clothes as well and you can march through the village completely naked!" yelled Tsunade with such a force that it almost broke the door off its hinges.

"Chm, so Hinata has Naruto supervising her?" smirked Ino. "At least someone got it easy, right Hinata… Hinata?"

Hinata just lay on the floor, her inner self finally giving up the fight and sending her into a sweet realm of unconsciousness.