Many a year ago, the Demagorgon attacked us. It stole lives from innocent people, and it nearly stole the life of my best friend. Will. But we killed it. And when I say "we" I mean Eleven. She was so brave, yet terrified to go against it. She closed the gate she opened. Since then, all is well. Well mostly anyways.
Things are the same except I'm dating El. She is one of the most important people in my life right now. She's the best. Until, last year when it all went downhill...
10/3/86
Sometimes, things can get out of hand. Like really out of hand. One moment you have your first kiss, nice and simple. Then the next, you're secretly having oral sex with the person you love.
Eleven's caregiver, Hopper, didn't want me dating her. In his perspective, I could corrupt her with feelings and things could get out of hand. Truth is, he was right. But it wasn't because we were going to do something extreme like sex. It was because we were split up so that she was there and I was here. The only thing we could communicate on were the walki talkis. We missed each other so much, and our thoughts were racing. So, we set up a date where El was alone at her house, and I came in and we started going at it. All I wanted was her. She was really one of the only things I could get love from. She needed me as much as I needed her.
After our "date" and some "photography" that included El wearing lacey things and much more. I gave her some pictures of me too. But before I knew it, Hopper found out about us. About our pictures, "date", and more. God, I had never felt more embarassed. I had to have a meeting with Hopper and my parents with El there too. We had decided that we would date in the future, but with complete parent supervision. We couldn't speak or touch one another and that was final.
But after school had started, El was in my homeroom class. Why did she have to be here now? I couldn't stand to look at her. I was angry, lost, and just full of saddness I would've cried looking into her eyes. I kept a straight face like I didn't know anything. At lunch, I hungout with Will, Dustin, and Lucas. El had made other friends last year, so she hungout with them.
Suddenly, she came and jump scared me from behind. Typical. But she said to meet her at "the spot". So I did. We met, and she looked at me and asked me: Do you still love me? I couldn't tell if this was a test or not. So I asked her the same question. She answered, yes. So I answered yes.
I wasn't lying when I told her that I still loved her. She is literally the best thing that has ever happened to me. Well, that and meeting my best friends. This girl means everything to me. She is my world whether or not Hopper or my parents say no. We sat and talked for a bit. We talked about our summer, what we did, our letters, how we felt. I showed her the cuts on my wrist I had been hiding with a long-sleeve shirt. She looked away, like she was dissapointed in me.
She knew my problems, depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts and actions. She gets sad and always looks dissapointed in me when I show her my carvings. I despised the look in her gorgeous eyes when I show her this. She hugged me, and for the first time in months, and she kissed me. A nice, subtle kiss. Then, we kissed a couple more times. We didn't use toungue, mostly because I had forgotten how to...
Our plan was to be at school and date, and after school, pretend like nothing happened. It was going well, except for the many anxiety attacks I was having.
What if they found out? What if they send her to another high school? What if I never get to see her again because I couldn't keep my hands to myself?
So many thoughts were racing through my head. Then it hit me, I needed a plan...
(To be continued!)