Threads of Destiny
A Bond Revealed
I was conceived in darkness. For nine months, I lay in the dark letting it grow inside me until I was finally able to shed the flawed vessel that carried me within it. There are times when I can still feel her essence clinging to me, covering my skin, suffocating me with her filth. I think I will go bathe.
When I am five, they tell me that I am now a brother. It seems they couldn't prevent themselves from breeding, disgusting animals that they are. The man, who I have been told to call Father, takes me to the hospital to show me this creature they are going to foist upon me. I have already decided that if it is objectionable that I will find some way to liberate myself of its presence. Father hands me a small, fragile bundle of life for me to hold and tells me that its name is Ritsuka…he is beautiful.
Ritsuka is perfect. Even in his newness, he is perfect. He is pink and soft. His eyes are an infant blue that are already starting to show hints of purple. His small head is topped in soft black fuzz and two small kitten ears. How is it that this tiny bit of wonder should come from the likes of them? He must be a miracle. I decide that I will keep him and that he will love me.
Years pass and I find that my brother is not like me. Where I am steeped in darkness, he shines with a light that warms even my cold heart; he blinds me with its brilliance. Why is it that I alone see how special, how unique, he is? I suppose I should not be surprised; the world is populated with ignorant creatures that are little better than chattel. All they see is a child that is free with his heart, what they do not see is how fierce and pure that love is and how it shapes the world around him. He has such power within him…and he loves me…but then he loves everyone. Ritsuka, I will find a way to have all your love for myself.
One of Father's collogues came to the house. He tells me that I am special, that I have a gift. I have always known that, I am somewhat surprised that any of these animals realized it. He tells me I am a Sacrifice and that I am to go to the School of the Seven Moons so that I might train to be able to use a Fighter. This school wants to give to me the means to destroy; I always knew that was my purpose, my destiny. It seems today my reason for being has found me and my heart swells in ecstasy at the thought of the destruction I will one day orchestrate. I will create a masterpiece of chaos.
I go to their school and they teach me what it is to be a Sacrifice. They tell me that I must learn to accept and withstand pain. I smile at them. I swallow the pain they give me, taking it into my darkness and distill it; one day I will return it to them in full thanks for their generous education. My teachers tell me that for every Sacrifice there is but one Fighter, that this Fighter is the other half of the Sacrifice's soul. How can this be? I am complete in and of myself. I have no need of anyone save Ritsuka and I know he is not a Fighter, therefore their premise is flawed. If they had told me that there is born but one tool, one weapon that was shaped by fate itself to be wielded by me; that I could accept. Apparently I alone, of all Sacrifices, was born whole, complete. I have always known I was special.
My teacher tells me that they have discovered my true name. They tell me that my name is Beloved. I should have known that the whore I have been told to call Mother and the cipher known as Father were too ignorant to name me properly. Beloved. I am beloved. Mother and Father both love me, but of what value is the love of one such as them. I am loved by Ritsuka. I think he is the source of my name. His love is the stuff of which miracles and the universe are made. I am Beloved of Ritsuka and that is all the more meaning I need. My Fighter, my waiting weapon, will bear my name as well. That is only appropriate; a trained dog ought to bear the name of its master so that all can see whose hand commands it. The name, Beloved, will make others quake in fear. It will be glorious.
Time passes. I go to their school and learn what they have to teach me and so much more. There is more to know than what they teach within the class rooms. They teach me to manage pain; I learn how to inflict it on another. They teach me to command, I learn how to crush the will of those who will not obey. I watch them and learn the artistry of deception, for all of them are liars and users. I am a vigilant student and they compliment me on my ability to find and exploit others' weaknesses. My teachers truly are ignorant and feeble minded. They fail to understand that I see the dross that they are made of. They will be so easy to break and they are the ones who taught me the way to do it.
When I am not at school, I am at home spending time with my Ritsuka. I watch him, study him, trying to figure out what it is that makes him a shining beacon in this world of drab grays. He alone is an enigma to me, a puzzle I have not been able to find the answer. I have not been able to find the answer to everything that he is but I have found some small clue that may lead me to an answer. My Ritsuka has a thread…it is fine and delicate and hides itself from view but every now and again it glows like moon light glinting off the silk of an abandoned spider's web. I feel if can find the meaning of this thread that is tied to my brother's soul, I will begin to understand what my brother is.
At the Seven Moons, I find the beginning of the truth. Who would have thought any truth might be lurking in that midden heap of lies and treachery? I ask my teacher, my advisor, if they knew what the meaning of a thread leading from the core of a person could be. My teacher smiled at me, pleased as if I am a precocious child that has spoken the answer to a complex question beyond my years. My teacher tells me that the thread I saw is the bond between a Sacrifice and their Fighter, that if I can see the thread then I can follow it to my Fighter. I am silent. I know that Ritsuka is not a Fighter. He is not capable of wanting to hurt anyone; he is a tender soul who loves all and will cry for their pain. No, he is not a Fighter…therefore he must be like me, a Sacrifice.
I have in my hand the beginning of Ritsuka's truth. He is a Sacrifice, one that I alone know about it. I will not tell my teachers what he is; they would only seek to bring him to the School and taint him with their teachings. I will not let them be the ones to leave fingerprints on his soul. When he learns the world is full of evil and darkness, it will be by my hand and mine alone. He belongs to me and I will not share.
Now that I know what I am looking for, I follow Ritsuka's thread, his bond. It takes me longer than I thought it would to find the Fighter who would dare to replace me in Ritsuka's affection. The bond is fragile and ethereal, there and perfect one moment and the next gone as if it never was; I am becoming annoyed with the thread's elusiveness. When I find this Fighter, I will make him pay for what he has put me through.
As I learn to follow his thread, I become aware of my own. My bond is not like the one tying Ritsuka and his Fighter, a shimmering bit of silk left over from the universe's creation, but a fine strand of nothing that soaks in the light and throbs with malevolence. I find my Fighter; I do not seek to know his name for it is not important. I can taste the quality of his soul and he will make an excellent tool; he was made for rending things apart. I am satisfied for now and leave him unclaimed, to be collected when I have need of him. I have another for which I am searching.
I find him at the School. He is a creature that is almost a legend within these walls. Agatsuma Soubi. He is the sole student of Minami Ritsu and he is beautiful. He is tall and elegant and fragile in his loveliness. He possesses flowing pale blond hair and eyes the color of sky after the clouds have wept themselves empty. Where Ritsuka would choose to love the world and share his love with all, this Soubi would give all his love to but one person; this Fighter would make that one person the God of his world. I can feel his need; he would try and take Ritsuka away from me. I will not let this happen, Ritsuka is mine and I will not share. I have decided that I will hate him.
I find all I can about this Agatsuma Soubi. He is a brilliant Fighter with a way with words and an eloquent spell-smith. He is without a Sacrifice. I already knew this because I know for a fact his Sacrifice is at home, playing the games children play and being admonished for not studying as much as he ought. No, this school believes that this Fighter is a blank slate; that he was born without a Sacrifice's name scribed on his heart. That may have been true when Soubi first came to the Seven Moons; there are few Sacrifices and Fighters with such a large age gap between them, a total of eight years. I guess the School's ignorance could be dismissed as understandable, but such an occurrence flies in the face of the tenants that are the founding principals of the School. I have decided that Minami Ritsu, Soubi's teacher, did not want there to be another who had prior claim on the soul that he has sullied with his teachings, with his touch, with his body; so Ritsu stopped looking for Soubi's Sacrifice to assuage his guilt, his sin.
It seems the School is searching for one to wield what Minami calls the perfect weapon. The teachers look for someone worthy to take the ownership of Agatsuma Soubi; they seek to give to another what is not theirs to give. I laugh at their ignorance and their hubris. They will learn to lament both of these sins. I petition to be given the Fighter. Who is better qualified than I to claim him? I am the top student in the Sacrifice side of the School and I have no Fighter that they are aware of. Besides all of that, I am the only one with a legitimate claim to this creature; I alone know his true name. I want him and I will have him.
The teachers question me about why I would seek to possess a Fighter not crafted for me. It seems they have concerns about my motivations. They ought to be wary; I will use this Soubi to practice for my masterpiece. I deceive them, using the art of half truths and lies I have learnt under their tutelage. I tell them, I know that somewhere there is a Fighter with the name Beloved waiting to be claimed by my hand, but I do not know, and neither do they, when that will occur. I ask them, does not every Sacrifice have a Fighter somewhere? If this is the only reason to bar me from taking Soubi, then it is a reason that applies to all Sacrifices. I tell them, he is a Fighter without a purpose, a tool made useless for lack of a will to give him meaning. They will decide to give him to me; I can see it in the eyes of Minami.
I do not meet with Soubi before they give him into my possession. Why should I? The Fighter has no say in who he is given to and I am not interested in conversing with a mere tool. When I first enter Minami Ritsu's office, I find myself captivated by his décor. He was decorated his private space in death and lined his walls with corpses. The stilled bodies of butterflies hang in frozen splendor, each once a living creature now secured by a single pin thrust through its center. If this teacher were not my inferior in everyway, I might have come to admire his work. There are few that understand that to truly possess beauty; you must be willing to destroy it. It is within this beautiful macabre tomb that I am finally given Ritsuka's Fighter.
Agatsuma Soubi. He is lovely, the way that Ritsuka is lovely. There is a purity within him, a yearning to give his love to someone who would merely accept it. He would ask for nothing for himself, only that he be allowed to give everything he is and will be to one person. I hate him for it. Though the Fighter does not know it, Ritsuka is the one he seeks. I will not allow it. I will take this Soubi's love and offer him nothing. No, that is not true, I will give him my disdain and pain unlike any he has ever known. I will possess all that Ritsuka is, even if it means I must lay claim to this fragile creature. I will whittle on his soul until I reshape him to my liking. Ritsuka, if the School is to be believed, after today I will own half of your soul; will you give to me the half still in your possession?
I lead the Fighter from Minami's office. For me to truly own him, I must sever all other bonds that have prior claim on his soul. I take a knife and tell him that I will carve my name into him. I see no fear in his eyes. He wants to be owned; he longs to belong to someone. The thread that connects him to my miracle, my Ritsuka, pulses as if it is aware of what I plan to do. I press my knife into warm yielding flesh and feel the skin part so easily as I carve away Soubi's destiny. Beads of crimson turn to small steady streams as I cut the barbs into his throat that will hold what he is inside him and will bar another from entering; I imprison him alone within his soul. Filament by filament I cut through the thread that connects this creature to my Ritsuka. It is tenacious, this bond.
Miles from where I am, a small boy, who is playing innocent children's game, collapses giving voice to a scream that lies silent and trapped in the throat that is being inscribed with my purpose.
My knife cuts the letters of my name one at a time into flesh already stained red. I replace the name meant for this soul. Love. That was the name meant to be worn by this Fighter. There is no other name that could describe the sum of Ritsuka's soul. Soubi is not worthy of such a name; he is not worthy of my Ritsuka. When I am done with him, I will leave him without the one thing he needs. I will leave him Loveless.
A/N I hope this will be the start to a multi-chapter story. Feed-back will determine if it will be continued. If you like it leave a review:)