A/N: It feels like I haven't written on this site forever or something. (Almost a month to be exact, but hey, I tend to exaggerate too much.) I knew that I needed to write something down before I explode. Anyway, yeah, I didn't like this too much, but it's just the same old story. I couldn't get it outta my head. But enjoy by all means!
The Tale of a Pair of Plaid Boxers
"So explain to me why I'm helping you clean your room?" Chad asked with disgust as he picked up a pair of dirty socks before throwing them behind his back. Just looking at the disorder that made up Sonny Monroe's room made him want to cower and hide. Aren't girls supposed to be neat freaks or something? Even his room was more organized than this mess.
"You're helping me because you called me, telling me that you had nothing else to do." Sonny said with an eye roll. "Just help me clean my room before my mom comes home and blows a fuse on me."
"I don't understand why you don't have a maid to do this for you." Chad muttered as he pushed the mountain of clutter off of Sonny's bed. He picked up an old box of pizza, grease marks running along the edges. He could practically feel the bugs leaking from it. Chad dropped it hastily and widened his eyes in horror, ready to gag. "Hey, Sonny, there's an amazing invention called a garbage can. I'm wondering if you've ever heard of it since it seems like you never used it."
Sonny smacked Chad with her pillow (it was actually clean, thank God). "Oh stop complaining." She said. "Why don't you sort through my clothes and I'll clean my bed since apparently you're not man enough to do it yourself."
"Hey, Chad Dylan Cooper is all man!" Chad defended himself.
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just fix my clothes." Sonny scoffed, pushing Chad towards her closet and drawers.
Chad mumbled incoherent words as he did what he was told. He opened one of her drawers to see clothes scattered in every direction possible. Chad dismissed it, moving onto another drawer. He opened it to find Sonny's undergarments. Chad smirked as his eyes lit up in interest, his teenage boys fantasies finally living in reality. He picked up one of Sonny's skimpier panties and studied it intently, wondering what days Sonny has ever decided to wear this to work.
"And here I thought that you were nothing but a goody-good." Chad chuckled. "I gotta say that I'm impressed, Sonny. I never knew you would own such a sexy pair of panties."
"Chad!" Sonny shrieked, grabbing her underwear and throwing it back down. "Who gave you the right to go through my underwear and bras?!" She scolded.
"I'm pretty sure you did." Chad raised an eyebrow, his smirk growing.
"Pft, well, um, uh, gah! Just…don't peak!" Sonny stuttered pathetically.
"Yeah, whatever." He snorted, having no intention to follow Sonny's plea.
He continued rummaging through Sonny's undergarments despite her disapproval. Chad could honestly say he was enjoying himself. He was getting a look on what was 'underneath the surface'—and he was annoying Sonny. And here he thought that helping his friend clean her room would be painful.
"Ooh what's this?" Chad asked. He pulled out a stack of posters hidden underneath all of Sonny's clothes. "Aaron Carter. Jesse McCartney. Zac Efron? Really, Sonny? Really?" He scoffed. "I'm hurt. I mean, I could haven handled Carter and McCartney but not Efron!"
"Hey, they happen to be really cute! If you don't think so then you're just insane." Sonny retorted.
"And…oh now here's something I like. Chad Dylan Cooper!"
"What are you talking about?!" Sonny demanded, grabbing the poster.
"Aw, Sonny, I never knew you were a fan." Chad teased ruthlessly. "You even bought one of my movie posters from a few years ago. How cute."
"I—I—uh—it was a g-gift. It's not like I could have turned it down." Sonny laughed lightheartedly, acting as if she could have cared less.
"Uh-huh." Chad smirked, showing that he could easily read through Sonny's façade.
"Whatever. I was never a fan of you, Chad. And if you don't believe that then—"
"Why the heck do you have a pair of boxers in here?" Chad asked incredulously as he pulled a pair of blue and black plaid boxers. He stared at them in disbelief then back at Sonny, his eyes narrowing. "Do you have a boyfriend I don't know about?" He glared at her.
"N-no! I would never do that. I—well—no!" Sonny blushed. "I, um, give me that!" She grabbed the boxers, throwing them on top of the Chad Dylan Cooper poster. She looked like she could just literally die of pure mortification.
"Wait a sec." Chad said, his anger slowly turning into realization. He cupped Sonny's burning cheeks before glancing down at the pair of boxers. His lips formed a taunting smirk, one that hinted Sonny that she was going to get it badly. "You're the creepy fan girl." He grinned.
"I have no idea what you're talking about." Sonny replied quickly (a little too quickly if you ask Chad) as she pulled away from her blonde friend.
"Oh my God! You are the creepy fan girl from three years ago!" Chad exclaimed.
"Chad, I'm insulted. You really think I'd be a creepy fan girl of yours?"
"I dunno. Explain why you have my boxers." Chad smirked.
"You can't prove anything!" Sonny insisted immediately, thrusting a finger into Chad's chest.
Chad broke into laughter. "O-oh m-my G-god. I-I can't b-believe you have m-my BOXERS!" He howled as he clutched his stomach.
--
It was the summer of 2007 in Wisconsin. The light breeze walked into Sonny's bedroom, ruffling the posters that weren't taped properly against the wall. "Ugh," Sonny mumbled as she added another layer of tape onto her authentic Chad Dylan Cooper posters again. "Even when it's summer, it's still cold." She complained underneath her breath.
Now, it was safe to say that Sonny Monroe was arguably Chad Dylan Cooper's biggest fan. She was a fourteen year old girl whose heart was stolen by America's hottest tween heartthrob. It wasn't really something to be ashamed of. After all, almost every girl within a twenty-five mile radius was just as in love with Chad Dylan Cooper as Sonny was.
"Sonny!" Her best friend, Lucy, exclaimed ecstatically as she practically jumped into Sonny's bedroom. "You will never believe who's in town!"
"Help me up with this first." Sonny instructed as she stood on her tiptoes, trying to make sure her posters stood still. "Almost there…almost…" she whispered as she tried to raise herself just a little bit higher.
"Chad Dylan Cooper is in the Hilton Garden Inn!" Lucy declared.
Sonny tumbled over, her poster landing flat on her face. She quickly pushed it off of her, her eyes wide with nothing but pure joy and excitement. "No way!" She gasped.
"Yes way!" Lucy cheered with a bright smile.
"But that's only ten minutes from here!" Sonny clapped her hands giddily.
"I know! This is why we need to get our butts there! Chad Dylan Cooper is shooting a movie up north, and he's only staying in Middleton for one night!"
"Then what are we still doing here?!"
Sonny grabbed her best friend's arm and dragged her out of the house to catch a bus. They drove all the way to West-Middleton where their favorite actor of all time stood nonchalantly; breathing in the same location they were in. Anyway, it's not like everyday you get to meet your future husband at one of the most lavish hotels in the city for the first time.
"Oh dang. I guess we're not the first ones." Sonny whispered as she and Lucy caught sight of the tight security that circled around every opening.
"Maybe we could sneak through the back door?" Lucy offered.
"They probably have that part covered too. How about we cut through the pool or something?"
"But the pool is indoors."
"Wait…why don't we just tell them that we're guests?"
"Oh. Psh, right. I knew that." Lucy said with an eye roll.
The two girls calmly walked through the front doors as if they were visitors of Middleton instead of crazed fan girls who were out to seek they boy they dream to marry. Miraculously, the security bought it. (Maybe it was their lack of screaming, hyperventilating, and obsessive behavior; or maybe they were just lucky.)
Sonny and Lucy looked around the lobby in awe, marveling the Hilton Garden Inn's beauty. It was almost like a castle filled with wonder and fairytales. Of course, the marveling and oohs and ahhs only lasted for a full two seconds before the girls began to search for the room that belonged to Chad Dylan Cooper.
"Which one do you think is his?" Lucy whispered as they walked into the indoor pool in hopes that Chad would be relaxing by the poolside. But to their disappointment, he was not there.
"Well, since he is Chad Dylan Cooper then he must be in the expensive suites, like the imperial suite or the presidential suite." Sonny explained as she stared up at the different rooms surrounding her.
Each room looked the same if you asked anybody. Prestigious and completely expensive. One room, however, happened to have a glass sliding door that was open just a bit with a Mackenzie Falls towel hanging by the side, enough for Sonny to catch a glance at it. Sonny's eyes glimmered as her smile grew slowly.
"Bingo."
Lucy followed Sonny's gaze until she reached the imperial suite all the way on the top floor. "Oh no. That's way too high, Sonny. You do realize that we'll have to climb all the way up there and possibly lose our lives!" Lucy shrieked, her eyes growing bigger and bigger as she studied the height from the balcony to the floor.
"Do you want to get into Chad's room or not?" Sonny asked, dragging her friend towards the wall where the balcony hung.
"Why can't we just go ride up the elevators, knock on his door, and ask for an autograph like normal people?" Lucy whined.
"Lucy, be reasonable."
"I am being reasonable."
"You really think that Chad Dylan Cooper will really open the door and let us have a special, private meet-and-greet?" Sonny asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Well…no."
"Exactly. This is why we're going to go up to his room without him knowing, so he wouldn't have to reject us immediately."
"So we're, like, gonna force him to have a meet-and-greet with us?"
"If you put it that way, you make us sound like we're psychopathic."
"Hey, this is your idea."
"Oh shut up and just climb up the dang balcony." Sonny giggled with an eye roll, pushing her friend towards the balcony.
The two struggled with climbing up a few stories up until they reached the imperial suite. With close cases of falling and people coming outside to see why the heck two teenage girls were risking their lives to get into the top balcony, Sonny and Lucy barely made it. And yet here they were, opening the sliding glass door to Chad Dylan Cooper's suite, actually living to tell the tale.
"It smells like him too!" Lucy whispered as she looked around the suite, taking every detail it offered.
"You know what he smells like?" Sonny asked in shock.
"No…but I've always dreamt about it."
"Look at this! Chad Dylan Cooper's clothes!" Sonny whispered as she dove straight for his drawers. "Oh my gosh. Luce, it's his boxers." Sonny squealed girlishly.
"Oh my gosh!" Lucy squealed as she grabbed the black and blue plaid boxers Sonny held in her hands dearly. Lucy pressed her face against them, inhaling its scent. "They smell like them too." She sighed dreamily.
"Okay, enough with the weirdness." Sonny giggled, grabbing the boxers back.
"You're one to talk, Ms. Let's Climb Five Stories to Meet Chad Dylan Cooper." Lucy smirked.
Before Sonny had the chance to shoot something back, they began to hear footsteps drawing closer. "Is it? Is it really? Well last time I remembered, I distinctively asked you to bring my entire set of hair products. Do you have any idea how flat and dull my hair is looking right now? …Yes, I know I'm just fifteen…No, too much hair product won't kill my hair just because I'm young…"
Chad Dylan Cooper. Chad DYLAN Cooper was in the room.
Sonny squealed shrilly, ready to let out a full out scream; but Lucy covered her mouth and grabbed her friend, pushing themselves tightly into one of Chad's empty closets. The two girls stared at each other at enthusiasm at first but then in worry as they heard Chad enter the room. Only God knows what would happen if he finds them in his room, realizing that they were lurking around, and are now holding his boxers.
"…what? Oh, sorry, I thought I heard something. Anyway, I don't understand why you're complaining. I should be the one complaining here. My hair is practically crying to death because of its lack of hair product! Do you have any idea how precious it is and how it must be handled with absolute care?! …"
Sonny couldn't help herself this time and let out a true fan girl squeal. Lucy immediately covered her friend's mouth again, her fingers crossed behind her back, praying that Chad wouldn't realize it.
They heard Chad freeze on his feet for a moment, the room containing nothing but silence. "Huh? Oh sorry, I wasn't listening. God, I could hear fan girls all the way up here…Yeah, whatever, just make sure that my hair products are here in a few hours." With that, Chad hung up and walked away, allowing Sonny and Lucy to sigh in relief.
"I think we should leave now—" Lucy began.
Lucy was cut off by the sound of a water running. But it wasn't the sink. Oh no, it was most certainly not the sink. Nope. It was a bathtub.
"Oh my gosh!" Sonny squealed again but this time much louder. "He's gonna take a shower! Oh my gosh!"
"Shhh!" Lucy warned.
Apparently, she was too late.
Chad opened the closet where Sonny and Lucy were cramped in, wearing nothing but a towel that covered his bottom half. The three stared at each other for a moment, speaking not one word. Chad merely stared at the two girls before him, giving them a look that said, 'what the heck are you doing in here?!' Chad stared down to see that Sonny was holding a pair of his boxers, causing his confusion to increase as he continued to mentally freak out.
"Ya know, normally I'd be happy to see two hot girls in my room, but the fact that you're in my closet and holding my boxers kinda ruins it." Chad said, folding his arms across his bare chest as he gave the two girls a knowing look.
"Oh my gosh. Oh MY gosh. You're—you're Chad Dylan Cooper!" Sonny squealed, throwing her arms around the heartthrob. "I know you don't even know me, but I love you sooo much! I'm, like, your biggest fan!"
"Wait, my towel is slip—" Chad wasn't able to finish his sentence before his towel fell to the ground with a silent thud, revealing his whole body to two strangers.
"Oh my, I'm sorry!" Sonny apologized quickly as she covered her eyes. "I'm so, so, sorry! I didn't mean to!"
"Security!" Chad screamed desperately as he wrapped his towel around himself in a frantic motion, his cheeks burning furiously. "SECURITY! GET OVER HERE RIGHT NOW!"
"Let's get outta here!" Lucy pushed Sonny out of the front door, the sound of Chad Dylan Cooper's voice still ringing in their ears as they ran towards the elevators, not stopping until they reached the lobby. The two girls finally escaped through the front door in one piece, the pair of blue and black plaid boxers still held firmly in Sonny's hand.
The friends panted heavily as they walked back to the bus station. "That was…fun." Sonny smiled.
"How can you still be happy after embarrassing yourself in front of Chad Dylan Cooper?!" Lucy asked incredulously.
"Hey, it wasn't that bad."
"Yes it was! The guy called security on us because he thought we were escapees from an asylum or something!"
"Pft, you're exaggerating."
"You know what, next time a famous celebrity comes to town, I am so not telling you. And if you do find out, I don't care how cute he is. We are sooo not sneaking into his hotel suite!"
Sonny giggled and linked arms with her fuming best friend. "At least we still have his boxers." She smiled. "What a souvenir, right?"
"Oh God, Sonny." Lucy rolled her eyes. "You and your obsessions."
--
"Oh shut up, Chad." Sonny glared, smacking her friend's arm with her hand this time.
Despite her many pleas, Chad just would not stop laughing uncontrollably. He was even close to tearing up. "I—I can't believe YOU out of every girl out there would climb through m-my balcony and steal my b-boxers! Ha! And you say that you've never even watched my show." He leaned against Sonny's dresser, holding onto it so he could stay standing. "Oh God, I am never going to let you live this down." Chad panted, tears actually slipping through his eyes.
"If you tell anybody then I'll—"
"Sneak through my front window and take another pair of my boxers?" Chad suggested, looking like he was about to explode with another round of laughter again.
Sonny's cheeks reddened. She looked like a little, mortified cherry as she crossed her arms across furiously, glaring at the floor. Nonetheless, she was still embarrassed, too embarrassed to speak even.
"Well, do you want them back?" Sonny asked indignantly after having enough with Chad's mocking laughter. She handed Chad's boxers back to him, fighting the urge to hurl something else (preferably pointy) at him.
Chad finally regained breath and stopped laughing. He smirked at Sonny, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "Nah, you can keep it." He winked.