Warrior 2011

I felt a gentle tap on my back as I felt your struggle begin to weaken under me. I couldn't help but feel a sigh of relief, as I knew you finally recognized it was time to stop and settle down.

"That's my boy." I thought proudly as I released my grip on you allowing you to take in some much needed oxygen at that point. Eyeing your shoulder I had just dislocated I began to feel guilt rising in my chest realizing I had hurt you. This did not sit well with me.

Hearing the loud roar of the crowd I ignored that immediately going into protective big brother mode. Crouching down to look at your face I began to worry. You were unable to move and that frightened me. I tried to get you up but you just stayed with your head down on the ground.

As you curled into yourself I began to worry even more and began stroking your hair soothingly. Caringly whispering, "It's okay little brother listen to me, you're okay. I'm so proud of you. It's over now kiddo you just breathe now. Try to stay with me okay.

Glancing around I saw the cameras making their way towards us so I tried to wrap a gentle arm around you and ease you up onto your feet to get you safely away.

Your body refused to respond so immediately I crouched down in front of you again cupping your face gently in my hands to look into your eyes. Bringing my forehead to press against yours I closed my eyes for a moment as I felt you tremble and my heart broke.

Once again whispering, "Its okay baby brother, come on buddy, easy I've got you let's try this again okay?" Gently again I tried pulling you up this time you collapsed into me shivering and sobbing.

I needed to get you away and now. I rubbed your back soothingly for a moment whispering, "it's okay you're alright we're getting you out of here."

Keeping my arm comfortingly around you I practically carried you out of the ring and down to the locker room. I refused to acknowledge the audience members giving their praise as I guided you away from them. Pressing my forehead to yours I said softly in his ear, "It's okay everything's okay just ignore them it'll be okay I'm getting you out of here buddy."

Finally reaching the locker room I gently eased you down and said softly, "Okay kiddo let's see that shoulder okay? We may need to get you to the hospital to fix it up just take it easy." Hearing you in pain broke my heart.

Carefully examining the wounded shoulder I let out a sigh of concern.

"Okay buddy I have to pop your shoulder back in. This is going to hurt just a bit okay you squeeze my hand and don't let go. Just ride out the pain okay? On the count of three little brother okay? One, two, three."

Soothingly I rubbed your back in small circles until I felt your muscles begin to relax under my touch. Gently taking a towel and smoothing your sweat soaked hair back like I used to do, I wiped away the smudges of blood.

Again pressing my forehead to his lovingly I said softly, "Okay kiddo we have to get you to the hospital and get this shoulder taken care of. We just gotta make sure it's not worse than it looks alright?"

I felt you nod into my shoulder and I smiled softly in return gently rubbing your back again for a moment to further calm you, I whispered softly, "Good you're gonna be just fine. I promise."

Checking the shoulder over a little more carefully satisfied for the moment it would be okay, I quickly threw on a shirt, and helped you into one yourself.

Easing you up slowly onto his feet I could see you swaying a bit and quickly caught you saying soothingly, "easy, easy I gotcha."

Wrapping an arm around your shoulder I gently guided you out to the car, opened the door and got you into the seat carefully.

Turning the engine on I glanced over to you worriedly, not liking how pale your face had just gotten. Reaching across I stroked your hair for another second to soothe the pain as much as I could. Upon arriving at the hospital in record time, I quickly jumped out and ran to your side.

Getting the passenger side door open, I carefully wrapped my arm around you again to help you balance. I walked into the hospital with you as fast as I possibly could.

I quickly cried for some help as I could feel you beginning to give all your weight into me, unable to keep steady much longer, so I held you tighter.

A nurse came running over and quickly grabbed a wheelchair. She turned to me and asked gently, "What's his name son? And can you explain what happened?"

Weakly I nodded, and explained that you and I were in a boxing match earlier as we both needed the money to support ourselves. I told her about how it turned out I had to go up against my own baby brother and had to hurt him to get the money.

At that moment I felt nothing but guilt. Feeling like I should have said no to fighting you, my own brother how could I do such an awful thing? Let alone to my younger brother? It's my job to protect you not harm you.

I couldn't help but think as I watched you being taken to a room in the back to be checked over, "Oh Tommy, what have I done?"

Sitting listening silently as the doctor listened to your breathing my heart constricted. As I heard every weak gasp for breath it tore at my heart.

I couldn't stand to listen to you, my little brother in so much pain. The pain I caused you.

Quietly I suddenly heard your weak raspy voice ask, "Br-Bren?" I smiled softly and moved forward squeezing your hand and replied gently, "It's okay little brother I'm right here buddy you're alright. It's almost over okay?"

Running a series of tests and checking his throat the doctor was positive that you would make a full recovery. I let out a big shaking sigh of relief.

The doctor did however request you stay with someone while your shoulder heals completely. Instantly I replied, "He's my brother he stays with me."

Glancing at you I saw a look of shock and somewhat of an argumentative look on your face. I gave you a stern big brother look in response that clearly said, "You're coming home with us no excuses little bro."

You instantly let out an exasperated weak sigh and I chuckled in response, as we both knew arguing was useless.

Clearing you with the doctor, and helping you get dressed, I smiled gently and said, "Come on bro let's get you home."

Walking out to the car we never lost the physical contact between us. I think we both needed the comfort of having each other again that we were not ready to lose that.

Unlocking the passenger side once again I gently helped you in, shutting the door, and getting in on the drivers side.

Smiling at you fondly I noticed you were practically asleep before we even left the hospital. I chuckled quietly to myself, ruffling your hair gently and started the engine.

Arriving in the driveway a few minutes later, soothingly I patted you on the head again and said softly, "Tommy, come on bro wake up we're here."

Reminiscing again I recognized the sleepy eyes of a young Tommy waking up in the morning and laughed. I helped you out of the car, down the walkway and wrapped a steady arm around you saying, "Easy bro I got you. Take it easy."

Gently leaning him back on the top step for a moment I pulled the key out, placed it back, then wrapped my arm around you again and guided you into the house.

Smiling at my wife Tess regardless of any arguments she may have, I was now back in big brother mode and would not accept no as answer. Especially not when my little brother's involved.

I told her quietly, "Tommy's staying with us for a while until his shoulder heals completely at least. And I just need to have him here with me for a while. I have a lot to make up for with him. This is just a starting point."

Tess nodded acceptingly and sighed, "Okay I guess that's okay." I nodded and couldn't help but also recognize that you had not yet met my two daughters. You are going to be an uncle little brother."

I chuckled quietly as I little by little helped you up the stairs and down to the guestroom.

For tonight I needed you with me just to prove you were here with me, and this was not some practical joke. So I helped you lie down on the bed as I saw a wince of pain cross your face.

I gently smoothed the hair out of your eyes as I had done when you were little. Whispering in your ear, "Ssssshhh easy bro it's okay you're okay now, just lie still okay."

Waiting a moment in consideration I was planning to run back to my room and grab a pillow and some blankets.

But then I thought we both needed the physical contact tonight, to know we're both here. And we're together again after all these years.

Quietly getting ready for bed I listened for any noises any signs that would indicate any nightmares or anything. Thankfully it appeared you were okay tonight.

Making my way over to the bed I silently sat down on the edge again carefully scooting over.

I wrapped my arm around you holding you tightly not wanting to ever let you go.

As I got comfortable by you I felt you beginning to stir under my touch. I pressed my lips into your hair for a second soothingly whispering, "Ssssshhh it's okay it's just me. Go back to sleep. Big brother's here I've got you it's okay."

Under my soothing words I began to circle my fist into your tense muscles in your back encouraging them to relax.

Letting a few minutes more pass just like this I felt you steadily begin to calm under me, and fall into a deep sleep.

One thought went through my mind at that moment as I began to fall asleep right after, that no matter what happened, after all this time, I had my baby brother again safe with me where I could protect him at all costs.

There was one thing for sure that this was a moment in my life I would never take for granted ever again.