(Ho!) I've been trying to do it right
(Hey!) I've been living a lonely life
(Ho!) I've been sleeping here instead
(Hey!)I've been sleeping in my bed,
(Ho!) I've been sleeping in my bed (Hey!)
(Ho!)
(Ho!) So show me family
(Hey!) All the blood that I would bleed
(Ho!) I don't know where I belong
(Hey!) I don't know where I went wrong
(Ho!) But I can write a song (Hey!)
1,2,3 I belong with you, you belong with me you're my sweetheart
I belong with you, you belong with me you're my sweet (Ho!)
(hey!)
(ho!)
(hey!)
The Lumineers- Ho Hey
"Fuck that!" she drunkenly bellows. There was no way she was going to play beer pong now. Not with the amount of alcohol she had just consumed.
"Babe," he whined, trying to get her to participate. They were the reigning beer pong champs, and he couldn't give the title away without a fight now could he? "We need to beat Em and Rose! Please? For me?" She side eyes the boy begging her. He knew guilt would never work, but he tried it all the same.
"For another shot?" he tried once more.
"Whiskey is obviously not my friend right now Edward." She huffed.
"For us?"
"How does this benefit us?" she questions him.
"For Jelly?" he knows not to bring her up, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
"AH! I thought we decided not to bring her up! Jelly was your fault!" she accuses, even though they both know it was her fault.
"My fault? You forgot to feed her!" he argues back, hoping for a win.
"You didn't remind me to. We both know I have a difficult time remembering things!"
"Like us? Or the game of beer pong we are attempting to initiate?" Rose asks. Slightly bored with their banter, but entertained all the same.
"Exactly! Why are you and Em standing there watching us fight? And why are we fighting?" she realizes that she has once again become distracted by the boy in front of her.
"So you will play?" he asks knowing that she can't remember the game, thanks to their longtime friend Jack Daniels.
"Play what?" he smirks at her innocence.
"Beer Pong!" Emmett joyfully interjects.
"Shit." He mumbles. Emmett is way too obvious for his own good.
"Oh," she thinks.
"So?" he questions.
"No." she smiles. Too much beer and too much Jack make Bella a slow girl.
"Please?" he tries once more to be polite. She just shakes her head in rejection.
"For Tupac? For Biggie?" he has resorted to bringing her heroes into the mix.
"Don't you dare drag Biggie and Tupac into this mess!" she exclaims.
"Low blow bro, I mean Biggie was a god damn legend." Emmett shakes his head in sadness.
"Tupac." Rose coughs.
"Rosie, I love you but one of the things I choose to look past is your love for Tupac." He cringes at the name, being a die hard Biggie fan.
"Dude, Tupac spoke the truth. Biggie just rapped about getting his 'dick licked'." She scoffs at her bear of a boys incredible misjudgments.
"Biggie is an inspiration!" He yells back at the blonde Barbie he would die for.
"Tupac organized his murder!" Rose yells right back.
"He's alive Rose! Don't tell me lies!" the man-child covers his ears and hopes to drown out the sound of her delightful voice.
"I'm not telling you lies, Em. He's dead and you know it!" she pokes him in the chest to prove her point.
"Lying Liar that tells Lies!" he angrily spits.
"Guys, P. Diddy organized both murders. There's a book about it. Read it." Edward interjects. He wants to get Bella to play beer pong and this has gone on far too long.
"Babe, please play beer pong with me. You are the peanut to my butter. The pork to my chop. The straw to my berry. The fro to my yo. The flame to my candle!" He's getting ridiculous and they both see it. Bella huffs in indecision and walks over to Alice and Jasper who have been quiet for the entire exchange. Reaching into her bag she retrieves a lighter and a cigarette. Lighting the stick she inhales and exhales, glaring at her lover standing across the room.
The mother of all staring contests ensues between the two lovers. After 10 minutes the sound of an excited voice breaks both the silence and their concentration.
"We win by default!" Emmett yells from his side of the table. Rose leans over to pinch him and he yelps in surprise.
"Ow. That hurt." He pouts.
"You do not!" they both yell. Glancing hopefully at his partner in everything, he anticipates her answer.
"….I guess…."she resigns.
"Fuck." Rose knows they are sure to win and when they lose Emmett always sulks.
"Where's the motherfucking beer in this bitch, we's about to get tipsy." Edward states jovially.
"PBR?" she asks him.
"Check." He smiles.
"Red Solo Cups?" he returns in question.
"How the fuck would we play beer pong without them, Eddie?" Emmett responds this time.
"Point made…" he sighs in defeat.
She smiles and grabs his hand, squeezing it in reassurance.
39 beers, 34 red solo cups, 27 minutes and 6 drunken attempts at sex by both Edward and Bella and beer pong is over. They remained the champions and in celebration, they took another shot.
"Let's play the question game!" she yelled excitedly.
"With four people?" Rose asks Bella in return.
"Fuck no, we'll wake Alice and Jasper up." She cheerily replied.
Walking over to the couch where the two were passed out, she started to yell and shake.
"Wake up! It's game time!"
"Nope," Alice mumbled. "It's pass the fuck out until tomorrow time."
"Hooker, get the fuck up or I will start to hump you. You know I'll do it." She said in hopes of rousing her friend.
"Please do." Edward cheekily said from the corner.
"Shut the hell up!" she said over her shoulder.
"Will there be alcohol involved?" Jasper said groggily.
Bella rolled her eyes and said, "Obviously."
"Then I'm up." He smiled, stood and sauntered over to where Emmett and Edward were standing.
"Way to back me up Jasper!" Alice angrily slurred in sleep.
"Alice, you can either get the fuck up or you can get the fuck up." Rosalie said, plopping down on top of Alice.
"Umph. Get off me whore! How am I supposed to stand up with you on top of me?" Alice screeched.
As they all laughed, Bella walked around the couch and pushed both Rosalie and Alice off the couch and onto the floor.
"Now, we all know that Emmett isn't the cleanliest dude," Bella began.
"Hey Smalls! That's not very polite!" Emmett yelled from across the room.
"So, if you don't want to get some new type of hepatitis I suggest you both get off his dirty floor right now and come play with us."
At the mention of the floor they were laying on, both of the girls stood and skipped over to where the boys were sitting.
"Rules. If you don't want to answer the question, drink. But if you choose this route, you have to take a drink for everyone question you skipped. So if you skip once, it's one drink. If you skip twice, it's two drinks. Bueno?" Rosalie tells the group. They all nod in agreement. "Right. So. Since Bella initiated the game, she gets to go first."
She fist pumps and glances round the circle.
"Emmett, how many girls did you sleep with before Rose finally tamed the beast?" Bella wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.
Emmett reached into the center of their circle and grabbed the bottle of Jack.
"It's going to be a long night." He mumbled as he took a drink." Rose glared at him as he turned his attention to Edward.
"Edward, what's that thing that you said Bella loves to do? With your balls?" Emmett asks Edward while staring directly at Bella.
"Okopoko Goggles!" Edward drunkenly and enthusiastically exclaimed.
She leaned across the table to hit him.
"Fuck you Emmett! And the fuck, Edward? Why are you telling Bigs our sex stuff?" She asks rapidly.
Scratching his scruff he just shakes his head and replies, "I don't know…" he trails off.
"What are okopoko goggles?" Alice asks curiously.
"Bro, it's when a dude puts his ballsack over your eyes. Best feeling ever. They are like tiny little sand bags over your eyes. Totally helps with headaches." Rose answers nonchalantly.
"Bigs! You fucking did it with Rose and now you're giving me shit about it?" Bella asks, unnerved.
"Well, yeah. Edward was telling me about how fuck awesome it was and how horny you got and so we couldn't not try it out. It was pretty awesome. Especially when Rose started to lick m-" He was cut off midsentence by Rose clamping her hand over his mouth.
"This game is over." She says hastily.
"You fuckers woke me up for this shit?" Alice spits. "I didn't even get asked a god damn question."
"Hey Alice," Jasper turns to her.
"Yeah, babe?" she asks.
"Want to go back to sleep?"
She nods excitedly and Jasper stands and throws her over his shoulder. Together they fall back onto the couch and fall back asleep.
"Why do our Sunday nights always end like this?" she wonders out loud.
"Have you seen the company we keep?" he replies.
She grins and gives him a kiss.
"Ew. My virgin eyes!" Emmett exclaims.
"Em, want to take those virgin eyes upstairs and show them the world?" Rose wiggles her eyebrows, shakes her hips and runs up the stairs.
"Later fuckies!" Emmett yells as he bounds the stairs, taking them two at a time.
"Did anyone get their paper done for Glenn's class?" she asks as they climb the stairs, careful to avoid the stains they helped to create.
"I did. You did. Rose read half the book. Jasper ripped a page out of the back and rolled a joint with it, Alice smoked said joint with Jasper. Emmett said he tried to google it but he couldn't figure out which book it was." Edward replied, shrugging.
"Why are we friends with them again?" she questions.
"Because we are all fifty shades of fucked." He smiles and hugs her from behind.
Reaching for her keys and jacket, she and Edward leave Big's house and walk towards her Jeep. After starting her car and rolling down the windows she hands him her iPod.
"What do you want to listen to?" he asks as he scrolls through her collection.
"Surprise me." She grins.
You pray to have your name scattered on the lips of the young
Now you claim that it's you on the tips of their tongue
And if you're proud of what you had to kill to get your thrill, well
I bet it stings to give up everything and realize that they don't want you
"Ellie King?" she questions him.
"Hey, this is a beautiful song." He attempts to justify his musical preferences.
"Yeah, if you're a pre-menstrual 17 year old girl." She scoffs.
"It's on your iPod!" he exclaims.
"I know…" she sighs in defeat.
"But it's a good song." He jabs at her.
"…yeah…it's a super good song."
He turns it up and they begin to scream the chorus in the confines of her car.
"It's a lonely road, where the forgotten go! Where your misery finds it's company! It's a long way down to the sacred ground! Where the reapers playing for keeps!"
"Babe?" he asks as he turns the volume down on her stereo.
"Hm?" she responds.
"Can I stay with you tonight?" he smiles as he runs his hand up her thigh.
"What color is the sky?" she questions.
"What?" he asks confused.
"Twat what?" she replies.
"What the fuck are you going on about?" he asks angrily.
"What are you talking about?" she says.
"Why didn't you answer my question?"
"What question?" she asks innocently.
"The one I just asked you." He states slowly.
"Oh, I thought we were playing the question game. You know, asking each other irrelevant questions that pertain to nothing of importance." She shrugs.
He sighs. "So that's a no?"
"What happened last time my Dad walked into my room and you were there?" she questions.
"Do you have to bring that up every time?" he exclaims in defeat.
"You seem to want to try all the time."
"Blame it on my libido." He winks.
She laughs and pulls up in front of his house, killing the engine.
"I'll see you in the morning babe." She smiles and kisses him once more.
"I'll pick you up." He tells her as he gets out of her car and shuts the door.
As she drives away, it's Nirvana that she hears.
With the lights out, it's less dangerous
Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us
A mulatto
An albino
A mosquito
My libido
Yeah
Ellie King- Playing for Keeps
Nirvana- Smells like Teen Spirit