Title: Truth
Summary: He knew the truth. And that wasn't it.
Characters: John, Teyla
Pairing: John/Teyla, Teyla/Kanan.
Rating: K
Spoilers: Missing, Seer
"John."
Suddenly, the sheet of paper in front of him was very interesting. He glanced up for an instant and in that moment he was sure his heart was going to leap up his chest, out his mouth and splat onto the very interesting piece of paper in front of him. Had it been a viable biological possibility, it would have happened to him, right there, right then. His eyes swept back to the paper in front of him and he gulped down a mouthful of lukewarm coffee in an attempt to dislodge the iron clad fist that had gripped his rib cage; damn thing was stopping him from breathing. He saw her sit delicately in a chair across from him and he found it increasingly difficult not to look at her. His eyes swept over her once more, settling for a second on her still flat stomach. He saw her hesitate before resting a gentle hand there and he wondered if she saw him glance at her.
"There is a matter I must discuss with you."
He made a noise that resembled a grunt but was intended as a word. He didn't know which word but a word none the less. He grunted again at his own inarticulateness. He didn't look up to see the frown that was on her face; his nose was so far down that it almost grazed the table. He hoped she'd get the hint and leave him alone. He just didn't think he'd be able to talk to her, not in the forthcoming days anyway. What Ronon had told him – and what he guessed she had come to tell him – needed a few days... oh, who the hell was he lying to? A few weeks, maybe even months to sink into his system before he could even contemplate thinking about it in her presence, never mind talking about it.
"There... On Athos, it is not customary for one such as me to not have taken a husband, to not have at least one child already... I had always..." she faltered and he forced himself to look up at her, even if it was just so the burning on the side of his went away. He couldn't hold her gaze any longer and before his eyes left her completely, he felt them slide to her stomach. He felt sick. "I... had waited." He said nothing, only cocking his jaw and shifting his eyes. The double meaning of her words was lost on him. He heard her sigh and he shuffled his papers. Finally, when it was clear she wasn't going to continue until he was looking at her, he straightened them, made sure his arms were placed exactly down the edges of the A4 sheets and lifted his head, settling his eyes on her face, his own expression hauntingly neutral. He watched as she breathed deeply, her eyes skittering away from his. "I am with child." John felt it like a full on punch to his gut. He didn't react, visually, like he hadn't when Ronon had told him. But inside... inside his lungs burned, demanding he let valuable oxygen into them, his heart hammered in protest, and his stomach flip-flopped in a way that was most unbecoming of a full grown man. "His name is Kanan."
Son of a bitch.
He'd sparred with him. He'd sparred with the guy who'd gone and... He inhaled deeply through his nose and let it out slowly through slightly parted lips.
It had nothing to do with him what Teyla did in her free time.
Slowly, he slid his eyes away from her face, dabbed the piece of paper in front of him – it might have been a report , he wasn't sure – and tucked his lips between his teeth. He scanned the words on the page in front of him, pushing his emotions out of his body through the tightening of his muscles.
"I know," he murmured lowly, his voice almost dangerous. He paused and raised his eyes, meeting her wide and surprised. He ticked his jaw again; bit the inside of his bottom lip. "Ronon told me."
He stood up quickly, sharply and stalked past her, leaving his might-be report behind, leaving her staring at the empty space, wondering about his quick, rude departure.
As he walked out of the mess hall, he told himself that it didn't matter, that it wouldn't affect them, that it had nothing to do with him.
But he knew the truth.
And that wasn't it.
