My Heart, a gakuen alice fanfic

Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own Gakuen Alice. But maybe this is a good thing, because the whole story plot would have totally have changed and you'd see walking cookies all over the manga. xD

Dedicated to:
sootyxsnowpetal

Thanks for the encouragement for my other story one shot "Love You So"

This is a oneshot, Part of the "Song from the Heart series"

Ready. Get Set. Go.

He sat in the lunchroom with his crimson eyes closed as he thought about how he wasn't even supposed to be born in the world. The bell rang as they got back to class. He sat close to the window and stared out to the small park outside the school where his favorite tree was. He'd think that the only place he actually belonged to was actually that tree. The bell rang and he headed towards his apartment dorm room. The only person that actually loved him was his little sister Aoi. And now she was off to the boarding school that he used to go to that was miles away from his college.

He opened the door and noticed his roommate inside as well. "Hey," the blonde haired boy said, "What's up Natsume?"

"The usual." He lay on his side of the room on his bed as he saw the blonde haired boy on the computer. He just stared at the ceiling as his own personal entertainment.

"Why don't you get a girlfriend Natsume. I mean there's a bunch of girls at school that swoon over you just when you get out the room."

Natsume shrugged, "Ruka, I don't feel like dating I mean I haven't met the person that I wanted to actually be with as a girlfriend." Not true. Natsume has dated before. One girl that he loved, but let's just say…it ended in a tragedy. The girl was only messing around with him and cheating on him. But for some reason, she still lingered somewhere in his heart. What do you expect, this is Natsume Hyuuga and it's rare for him to even love anyone, it's surprising he loved anyone at all. But the problem is, that he never got over her, and he thinks that he never will.

Ruka sighed, "Oh well, hope you meet someone so your not always locked up in the room," he grabbed his books and headed to the library to return them.

Natsume opened the radio and whatever station it was on he just listened to all the crappy love songs that he never actually liked. But he didn't care, he didn't want the silence that he usually yearned for this time. But what the announcer had said had sort of caught his mind…

'All right everyone! We got a new song here for you guys. She's a new artist and she's asked me as a personal favor to put her song up on the radio. She's a very special friend of mine and here she is! Wait by the way, she will be singing as an anonymous singer so sorry, anyways here's her new song 'My Heart!'

The music began to play and the voice of an angel came up and Natsume just listened to the lyrics as he heard the sound of drums and that new singers voice.

I am finding out that maybe I was wrong

That I've fallen down and I can't do this alone

Stay with me, this is what I need, please?

Sing us a song and we'll sing it back to you

We could sing our own but what would it be without you?

He just listened to someone for one of the first time in his life. It was like her voice was brightening up his sorrow life.

I am nothing now and it's been so long

Since I've heard the sound, the sound of my only hope

This time I will be listening.

Sing us a song and we'll sing it back to you

We could sing our own but what would it be without you?

This heart, it beats, beats for only you

My heart is yours

This heart, it beats, beats for only you

My heart is yours

(My heart, it beats for you)

He understood the girl's feelings in between the lyrics. Who was she? Did he really want to know? Yeah he did. For the first time in his life, he felt…happy. He was happy since the song composed by this mystery girl was exactly how he felt. Now he knew that he wasn't alone. He knew that someone was out there that shared or had shared his pain.

He wanted to find her. He didn't know why but all he wanted to do was meet her. Find her. And who knows what else.

The next day, there were two new students in class. "Okay class, there will be two new students joining our class today. Please come in," Natsume was barely even listening to the teacher instead he was thinking about the song yesterday.

"My name is Mikan Sakura and this girl here, is my best friend Hotaru Imai!" Natsume looked at the two, and he could see that the girl that wasn't talking with short black raven hair and amethyst eyes didn't enjoy the blabbering of the other girl. Mikan Sakura.

Natsume already knew that the Mikan girl would be an annoying pest to him. He thought that she'd be just one of those girls that are willing to give him the time of day just in the blink of his eye. He thought that she's one of those shallow girls that only think about their appearance and he had no time for that. He knew he wouldn't have problem with the Hotaru girl though. He hoped that the Hotaru girl would keep the walking annoyance in pigtails away from him.

"Typical, the walking pest had to be seated next to me of all people," Natsume thought to himself, "Wipe that smile of your face stupid." He was stopping the urge to say that exactly to the girl.

"Hello, my name is Mikan and yours is?" She was talking to him.

He sighed, "Natsume Hyuuga." He said coldly which didn't seem to bother her in the very least. Instead, she seemed like she knew exactly what was going on in his mind as her eyes became a bit deeper. Which of course Natsume didn't bother to notice.

She had a feeling that she knew how he felt. So, she just sat back down beside him and just focused on the work. Natsume was taken aback to this since he seriously thought that she'd totally be flirting with him all the way since she sat beside him, instead she just left him alone. Natsume was grateful for this, but something in him ticked, he didn't know what.

Natsume went to his so-called abode, the Sakura tree. He jumped to the highest branch and just lay there and stared at the blossoms of the tree. He forgot his manga in his dorm room so he couldn't really do much. He heard someone come closer to the tree. Mikan Sakura sat on the trunk of the tree. She didn't have that smile that was as bright as the sun on her face. Instead, there was a frown, sad and weary eyes. Natsume looked at her and he didn't know what was wrong. His brain was saying "don't care" but every other part of his body made him want to jump off the tree and just ask her what's wrong.

Just when he was about to jump off the tree, giving into his oh so tempting desires to go to her, Ruka came, "Mikan? Is that you?" Ruka couldn't see her face.

As soon as Mikan heard him, she slapped her self-fast, "Mikan smile now." She told herself and soon there was a smile on her face. Natsume knew, that the smile she showed, was a fake. "Oh hi Ruka-pyon, I'm sorry I had to go before. I'm glad to have made a new friend here, and I'm sorry if I was rude."

"No Mikan it's alright, have you seen Hotaru?" He asked Mikan.

Mikan made looked at him suspiciously and Ruka blushed, "Ruka-pyon, can I ask you a question," she said smiling wryly, Ruka nodded. "Do you have a crush on Hotaru?" Ruka blushed, "Oh my god! You do Ruka-pyon!" Mikan was laughing with glee in her voice.

"Shh…Mikan stop being so loud." Ruka tried to shut her up.

Mikan just kept laughing, "You do Ruka-pyon! I'm going to go tell Hotaru, she'll finally have boyfriend!" she exclaimed, she started to walk but Ruka stopped her.

"No! Mikan please don't tell her. Please please please!" Ruka pleaded.

Mikan sighed amusingly and then smiled at him, "Don't worry Ruka-pyon, I was just kidding, it's your business not mine but I'm very happy for you and Hotaru. I don't think she likes you because it's still to early but just show her kindness and please bare with her loony tactics and insane attitude. And promise me that if you two ever become an item, never hurt my best friend okay? I don't want her to get hurt like that, it hurts and I don't want her to feel that." She smiled sincerely to Ruka and he agreed.

"I promise Mikan," then he walked away to go look for Hotaru and just hang out with her he thought. Mikan watched him go. She smiled until he was gone. Then, her eyes showed hurt again. She didn't want anyone to see her like that. She wanted everyone to see her with her smile because she knew that happiness is contagious and also that sadness was as well. But she couldn't smile that long anymore. Not after what happened.

She sat back down beside the trunk of the tree. She sighed and was about to start sobbing a little. Natsume jumped down beside her expressionless and she screamed and fell down on her head, "Ouch. What the hell! Natsume? What are you doing there?" She asked him angrily pouting a bit.

Natsume knew that her whole happiness and cheerfulness was a charade. At least, it was now, she could have been like that a long time ago but he knew that something horrible had changed it, "Boo," he smirked, "polka dot panty girl."

Mikan took a while understand what he was saying as his smirk grew bigger and bigger. Then she blushed as red as a ripe tomato. She stood up quickly and fixed her skirt, "Natsume you're an idiot and a pervert!" she began to pout since she felt so embarrassed, "Now look at what you did you ass hole!" She looked at the sky and did a praying form, "God, I'm sorry but I don't think I'm going to be able to get married because of this mongrel that you created." She looked down, "I'm so sorry."

Natsume stared at her and was holding the urge to laugh since that wasn't what he does, he's got the reputation of the cold-hearted hot guy and he didn't feel like changing that but looking at Mikan and seeing her embarrassed face, he burst into laughter.

"Natsume you're a perverted jerk," Mikan stuck her tongue out at him and crossed her arms.

"Why thank you, and you're an insolent monkey that wears polka-dotted underwear." He was still laughing as her face began to turn red again.

"Jerk!"

"Stupid."

"Pervert!"

"Polka-dots."

She blushed, "You stupid mongrel!" He laughed again and Mikan just started to laugh with him. Next thing they knew, they were laughing and wrestling on the floor.

"What are you doing polka! You know your not going to win!" Natsume was laughing at Mikan's determination to hurt him.

Mikan blushed but she was laughing as well, "Don't call me that! You stupid robot!"

That went on until the last bell rang, they were just glad that their last class was free period. In the end, Natsume won by carrying Mikan bridal style, which she didn't seem to notice that it was a very bad position for them, and dropping her butt first into the trash can. She struggled and wiggled and everything else she could do to get out. But she couldn't. Natsume was still laughing like hell as Mikan fell over with the trashcan still stuck on her butt.

Mikan sighed in defeat, "Fine, you win, now." Natsume smirked in victory, "Natsume," he looked at her calm face, "GET ME OUT OF THIS FUCKING TRASH CAN IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU," which soon turned to annoyance and irritation.

Natsume laughed at her. He hasn't laughed in ages but he wondered why he was laughing now. He agreed to the solution of physical humiliation to the annoying Mikan Sakura. It felt good to laugh and smile around her though. He let it go and just helped her out before she could do something wreck-less like break the trash can in half with all her struggling.

Mikan ended up insulting Natsume again which Natsume diverted by putting on an innocent act, "What are you talking about polka, I didn't do anything wrong."

Natsume started laughing again and Mikan ended up laughing as well. He liked the feeling, but he didn't know why he was laughing, he hasn't laughed for years now but just because of Mikan, he was laughing so hard that he felt tears coming out of his eyes.

It's been about three months now since Mikan entered the school. Ever since then, Mikan and Natsume's bitter rivalry never ceased. Hotaru and Ruka were dating now, which Mikan was overly excited for. Natsume always saw Mikan on the Sakura tree a lot, almost during every free period. Of course all they did was insult each other. Natsume never smiled or laughed anywhere else but there with Mikan.

They knew a lot about each other now. They were like best friends that didn't know they were. Mikan and Natsume were always together. People suspected they were dating but as soon as they'd see them fighting and insulting each other, that theory flew out the window. Natsume began to open up to Mikan even more and Mikan did the same.

One day, as Mikan and Natsume sat next to the Sakura tree playing cards, of course one another accusing each other at times of cheating, Natsume remembered Mikan the first day of school when she'd used fake happiness. He'd rarely see that now, instead there was always a pure smile on her face which Natsume was really happy to see. "Polka."

"Would you stop calling me that! You've never even used my given name once." She argued trying to think of a card to pick so that she'd win. Yes even playing Go Fish was a big rivalry match between the two.

"Okay then, Sakura." He smirked, "I would have never thought that you loved your name so much that you'd actually use them as your underwear prints. Cherry blossoms I see." His smirk grew.

"What the hell! How do you know you peeping tom!" Mikan was red faced now filled with embarrassment, which caused her to lose and they restarted their game.

"Polka, no I'm not going to stop, can I ask you a question?" He asked her as he had to Go Fish.

"Yeah, as long as it's not about my underwear you perv." She said putting two cards that matched into her pile.

"On the first day of school," he began, "you sat here and when Ruka came," Mikan froze, "you put on a fake smile. Why did you do that?" Natsume was staring at her intensely. She couldn't escape his crimson eyes. She couldn't lie her way out.

She sighed, "When people see that I'm not smiling or cheerful, they worry about me. I don't like it when they do that so even at the hardest times, I smile for them to see." She had three cards left.

"But why were you sad that day?" He was barely paying attention to the game now.

She got another pair, "Because, I remembered the guy that broke my heart." He looked at her much more now, "It…hurt so much…that I put all of the anguish into a song. But it never really left me all the way." She smiled at him, "But it's all gone now Natsume, because of you."

He looked bewildered, "Me? Why me?"

"Because you made me smile again."

Weren't you the one that did that for me? Natsume asked himself. But instead, he smiled. "Can I hear the song?"

She thought for a while, "Sure. When do you want to hear it? It's not that good though so don't make fun of it if you do get to hear it."

"I promise I won't and what about after school?" he asked her.

She thought about that for a second too, "Okay then, but I have to get my guitar at my house first and then we can walk back here and you can hear the song is that okay?"

"Sure sure." It was his turn to go fish and there was one card left in his hand. And there was also one left in Mikan's. He went Fish and got the pair. He showed it to Mikan, "I won birdbrain."

"What! No way! You cheated!" Mikan debated.

"No I didn't! I played fair and square." Natsume argued back.

"Your such a liar."

She pouted and turned sideways looking into space. Natsume looked at her. He knew how he felt for her. But he didn't know what she felt for him. He knew that he finally fell for someone again. But the bad thing was that he didn't know what she felt for him. He sighed and looked down.

She turned back and saw Natsume looking at his foot. She blushed as she stared at him. She liked him as well, but same goes for her, she didn't know if he liked her that way. (Two dunderheads fell in love. What irony. :D)

After school, Natsume waited under the Sakura tree for Mikan to return with her guitar. She got back about ten minutes later.

"Remember your promise Natsume, no bad remarks." Mikan reminded him.

"Whatever Polka-dots." She rolled her eyes.

She strummed the guitar, and began to play some notes. She began to sing. A familiar tune in Natsume's ears.

I am finding out that maybe I was wrong

That I've fallen down and I can't do this alone

Stay with me, this is what I need, please?

Sing us a song and we'll sing it back to you

We could sing our own but what would it be without you?

Natsume stared at her. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. It was the song and the girl that sang the song that he's been looking for. (Well he hasn't really but pretend he has.)

I am nothing now and it's been so long

Since I've heard the sound, the sound of my only hope

This time I will be listening.

Sing us a song and we'll sing it back to you

We could sing our own but what would it be without you?

This heart, it beats, beats for only you

He couldn't help himself. He closed his eyes and just listened and enjoyed her singing. He knew that she was her. He knew that he's fallen for her.

This heart, it beats, beats for only you

My heart is yours

This heart, it beats, beats for only you

My heart is yours

(My heart, it beats for you)

As Mikan song came to an end. She noticed a small smile on Natsume's face. She smiled that he liked it. But just in case, "Did you like it?" Natsume opened his eyes to see Mikan right in front of him and before he knew it, the deed was done.

Mikan's eyes were wide open as Natsume kissed her then and there. She closed her eyes and started kissing back. By the time they were out of breath, they separated and gasped for air. Mikan was as red as Natsume's eyes.

They were happy that each other kissed back but they were thinking the exact same thing. "He/she kissed me back, does that mean he/she feels the same way?" They didn't care much though; they had a good feeling that it was yes.

End

*A Loverly Smile