Title: Cowboy Fights and Space Wars
Genre: Humor/Friendship
Rating: K+ for intended swearing and bet making (as always, just being safe.)
Well I tried to be humorous. That's up to you to decide! Welcome to my first toy Story fiction with Jessie. I didn't plan it out that way, it just came out from her point of view. It seems slightly random to me, but if you like it then I've done my job.
Oh and if you haven't at least seen the Original Series of Star Trek, I see no point in reading this fiction. Just a warning.
Kay I'll shush now.
"No way!"
"I speak the truth, cowboy."
"Picard is not a better Captain than Kirk!"
The scene was one that was repeated often. That is, nearly every Saturday that the sci-fi channel played Star Trek re-runs.
Jessie didn't know about anyone else, but she was getting howdy-doodling tired of Buzz and Woody's space fights.
"Look, why don't you two just agree to disagree!" the red-head hollered.
"Here, here," Hamm repeated sheepishly from the window, sporting Mr. Potato head's black bowler hat on one pointed ear.
"Yeah, I can't hear myself think over here," said hatless potato agreed.
"Where were we?" the coin-filled pig reminded his buddy.
"You were about to bet me my left eye that they'd forget about this in a week."
"That was last week."
"So, what!" the spud said sarcastically.
"Uhuh. Pay up," Hamm wheedled.
Mr. Potato Head swore under his breath and popped out his eye.
"There," he said grudgingly.
Hamm clicked his hoofs happily on the wooden floor and grinned, taking it.
Jessie rolled her eyes and focused her attention again on the cowboy and the space ranger. So far, so good. They only seemed to be watching TV, but one couldn't be sure. If the fight got loud again, she was going to take some action, dang it.
Just to be sure, she plopped down behind them and adjusted her hat, glaring at the television screen and the source of all this noise.
She saw a man in a golden shirt go walking down a hallway, flanked by a grumpy looking old man in blue scrubs and another, stranger man with pointed ears and upswept eyebrows.
Her glare disappeared.
"Hey…who're they?" she asked Woody, forgetting her annoyance for the moment.
Woody grinned.
"The one in the middle is Captain Kirk."
"And he's your favorite?" Jessie asked.
"Yup."
"I wonder why," Jessie said, looking again at the screen. The man named Kirk was standing in the middle of a big platform along with his two friends. Sparkles surrounded them and they suddenly disappeared.
"Howdy hey, where'd they go?"
"Transported to a planet," Buzz said, and shushed her.
What happened to their fighting!Jessie thought. They were being really quiet now. She stayed and watched, though, unable to help herself. She'd never seen a science fiction show before. Usually if it didn't involve cowboys or horses she didn't bother with it. But there was something about this show, a feeling about it that she liked. It made her feel like she was watching something like Bonanza or an old spaghetti western.
Jessie waited for a commercial break to eagerly ask Buzz and Woody questions about it. Neither of them seemed inclined to begin fighting again, and so when the show came back on and the episode came to it's end, Jessie went away and thought about what she'd seen.
"Captain Kirk," she said aloud, liking the sound of it.
She shook her yarn-topped head and walked off to go do something else for awhile. Watching Hamm and Potato Head play strip battleship wasn't too much of a wonderful-sounding option, so she ended up wandering into Molly's room instead.
She caught the eye of Bo Peep, who waved at her with her blue shepherdess' crook from atop Molly's pink and white dresser.
"Howdy!" Jessie said, craning her neck to see and waving her hat. She hopped and climbed her way to the top of the dresser, greeting the china lamp accessory. Of course to Jessie and the other toys, she was more than just an accessory. Bo Peep was like a sister to Jessie and they stayed up talking sometimes when the nights were long and boring.
"Watcha doin' all the way in here, Bo?" Jessie asked her.
"It's Saturday isn't it?" Bo smiled.
"Yup," Jessie said, unaware of how much she sounded like Woody when she did. "The guys are in there watching TV," she added.
"Star Trek," Bo said with a knowing nod.
"Oh, you know about it, huh?"
"Yes. They both refuse to admit they're both wrong," Bo chuckled.
"Oh yeah?" Jessie grinned. "Do tell!"
"Mhmm. Star Wars is far better."
Jessie was overcome with mirth, saying in between giggles, "Try tellin' that to Buzz!"
When she got back to Andy's room, they were arguing again just like before.
She gritted her teeth at the sound of it, pulling her red hat around her flaming yarn hair, huffing angrily.
…"Remember when Kirk sacrificed his career to save Spock's life? Tell me if Picard ever did anything that awesome," Woody was saying.
"Yeah, that's really good, except he stole his own ship to do it, Woody!"
"Tell me how that is such a bad thing!"
"Well he obviously has no sense of regulation," Buzz said flatly.
"In the end, it saved Spock. That's all that matters."
"Everything could've been lost! That was such a stupid decision."
Jessie calmed down, listening intently. Again, despite herself, she was being pulled in to the craze.
She hid on the tabletop on her stomach, watching the space ranger and the cowboy with her elbows propped up and her chin in her tiny plastic hands.
This was getting interesting.
"Why do you hate Kirk so much?"
"Because he's such a….a…a cowboy!" Buzz's arms flew up in agitation. "Doing whatever he pleases, whenever and however. It just…gets on my buttons!"
"Even though he did it for the final good of his friends?" Woody grinned.
"Well….," Buzz thought for a moment, considering, then remembering a few months ago when…
"That's right. If you hadn't acted like such a cowboy, mister, I'd be in a museum in Japan!" Woody teased Buzz.
"You're right, Woody. But…"
"No buts, if you say another word I'll sic Jessie on you."
But both were grinning.
Jessie blinked. "Hey when did I come into this?"
"You were listening?" Buzz's eyes widened.
"Buzz, the whole room can hear you. Bo Peep can hear you from Molly's room!" Jessie giggled.
"And you'll never guess what she told me!"
Woody's brows came together in suspicion. "What did she tell you?"
"I'll let you know….but first, I want Buzz to do something."
Buzz and Woody exchanged glances. Making promises with a hyperactive red-headed cowgirl? You never knew what you were going to get.
"Okay…what, Jess?" Woody crossed his arms.
Jessie flipped up onto her booted feet and tapped over to Woody, putting her hands on his ear and whispering. Woody's eyes first widened, then he smiled.
Buzz didn't like that smile.
"Hey….uh, I'm still here," the space ranger cleared his throat.
Jessie giggled and Woody burst out laughing.
"Okay, Buzz? You're going to be our first ever….Space cowboy!" Jessie grinned, hugging him.
"I….I am?"
"Yeah, Buzz, your lasso and yodeling lessons start tomorrow!" Woody told him, brown eyes sparkling with good humor.
"They…..they do?"
"Sure!" Jessie said, prancing about. "But first….I'll tell you what Bo told me. She said…."Jessie lowered her voice to a near whisper, "That Star Wars is better than Star Trek any day!"
With that information shared, she leapt off happily, sparing one glance for the delicious look on both their faces.
After all, who would dare argue with Bo?
Later, Jessie made bets with both of them. They were both pretty annoyed at her, but united in their mutual dislike for Star Wars, they were both competitive. That's just what the cowgirl wanted.
And of course Jessie won out in the end.
That night she sat on top of Molly's dresser with Bo again, giggling as she told her story.
"I ended up short-sighting both of them!"
"I'm dying to know," Bo whispered, for Molly was asleep. "What'd you do to Woody, nothing too bad?"
"He's got to give up his hat for a week," Jessie giggled into her own hat, not being as careful as Bo at not making noise.
Bo made a sympathetic sound, but she smiled all the same.
"And Buzz?"
"He's gotta wear Woody's hat and take yodeling lessons from me!" The ginger-haired doll laughed.
Hope you liked!
Oh, the never-ending battle between cowboys and space toys. I love it.
I addressed lots of issues here.
Kirk VS Picard.
Star Trek VS Star Wars.
Cowboys VS Science fiction.
the list goes on.
I have too much time on my hands. I know. Seriously.
The ending seemed like it was lacking, but I'm a lazy girl when it comes to re-writing. Still, if I'm prompted I might take the time to flesh some more paragraphs out if people think it's too rough-ish.
Peace, ya'll! :D