How Far
A/N: This is going to be where all of my songfic stories will be posted. Each different chapter will be a whole different storyline. Also, each chapter will be a different song. Not every one of them will be carby. This song is "How Far," by Martina McBride. This is my version of what should have happened the night Carter left the 2nd time.
ABBY'S POV
"John…I can't keep doing this!" I shouted at the top of my lungs. I couldn't breathe. He was leaving me again. The first time he left I broke down piece by piece. But seeing as how much I loved him, I forgave him, and we went through life. Then, just like that, I realized he was leaving again.
There's a boat, I could sail away
There's the sky, I could catch a plane
There's a train, there's the tracks
I could leave and I could choose to not come back
Oh never come back
He looked back at me. Who knew he would have the guts to? Well, I guess he would. He had the guts to snap my heart in half. Hadn't he already done enough damage? Hasn't he realized he hurt me before? Our relationship was my main concern. I wasn't going to let him go that easily.
"John!"
He stared at me. I could see the tears forming in his eyes. Just seeing him like this made me want to cry. I held my breath, wondering when he would speak.
There you are, giving up the fight
Here I am begging you to try
Talk to me, let me in
But you just put your wall back up again
Oh when's it gonna end
CARTER'S POVI looked into her eyes. I mean really looked into her eyes. They shone with tears. I could see them through the snow flakes falling softly from the sky. I couldn't speak. I probably looked like an idiot because I wasn't speaking, but then again, in her eyes, I probably already was one.
"Abby…"
She shook her head.
"Don't go…don't leave me…please!" She was crying hard. Walking forward, barely stepping, biting her lip. I just stood there. Before I knew it, she was standing in front of me.
How far do I have to go to make you understand
I wanna make this work so much it hurts, but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living with the way things are
So I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say how far
"Abby, I…" my voice was cracking. She held my face in her hand. She cradled it, and brought it down to hers. A soft and gentle kiss can still send shivers down your body, especially ours. I pulled away. Her eyes begged me to stay. I knew she wanted me to. Slowly, Abby wrapped her arms around my waist, and dug her face into my chest. I complied and held her close. We just stood like this, never wanting to let go, but I knew that I had to go, it was my duty. Luka's fate rested in my hands. I begged Abby to let go. Without words, she still understood.
She pulled away and hugged herself. Still crying, she let out a final goodbye. Walking backwards, she stared into my eyes for the final time.
"Abby! I swear I'll come back to you! And when I do, when the day comes, I promise that we'll be happy. I swear on Gamma's grave that I will never leave again. But this is something that I have to do. I owe it to Luka."
She nodded, and I turned around, sealing our fate.
There's a chance I could change my mind
But I won't, not till you decide
What you want, what you need
Do you even care if I stay or leave
Oh, what's it gonna be
I walked forwards. One step, two steps, three steps. I don't turn back. I can't. I can't look at the face that I left behind. The face of beauty, innocence, and hurt.
How far do I have to go to make you understand
I wanna make this work so much it hurts, but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living with the way things are
So I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say how far
ABBY'S POV
I watch the only man I have ever loved leave. He didn't even look back. Was what he said true? Did he really want to be with me? I thought I only caused him trouble. He wouldn't have sworn on Gamma's grave if he didn't mean it. I just don't understand. As I recalled the bittersweet taste of his lips on mine, I finally understood. That kiss…he really didn't want to leave. Luka is out there somewhere, dying, and all I can think of is John. I am just selfish I guess.
Seeing him walk out of view is going to be one of the most painful memories of all time for me.
Out of this chair, or just across the room
Halfway down the block or halfway to the moon
How far do I have to go to make you understand
I wanna make this work so much it hurts, but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living with the way things are
So I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say
Yeah I'm gonna walk away
And it's up to you to say how far.