Theo was convinced that he would grow up to be a blind, no teeth-having hunchback with permanent crease marks across his forehead. This was the consequence of researching for a living.

It wasn't Theo's fault that his parents had a well-stocked library in his childhood home. Granted, most old pureblood families had the same thing due to years of ancestors collecting the written word and passing it down. Aside from money, knowledge was power, and it was important to have. That was the mantra metaphorically beaten into Theo's head during his upbringing, and it was something that he couldn't shake. It was why while his friends had been wasting time in the common room or spending unnecessary hours in the Great Hall after eating, that he was alone in the library studying. It was why he had done exceptionally well on his OWLs and his NEWTs , and why the Ministry was happy to have a bookworm like him in their Research Department.

The Research Department was massive, and it held several subsections annexed to other departments that would need a specific expertise. As Theo had many interests, he had his pick of the lot. Out of everything that he could have chosen, it was the research sector of Muggle Relations. His parents (hell, everyone) were baffled by his choice, but it was a logical one for Theo. Despite the wizarding world being its own successful bubble, it was just that. A bubble. It was an hidden speck of life operating in a world run by muggles -squibs too, if one truly knew the statistics of how often an occurrence actually happened. To continue to be successful, the wizarding world needed to be aware of and understand everything that the muggles were up to. In conjunction with the Department of Muggle Relations, that's where Theo and his coworker came in.

Speaking of his coworker, she had suddenly disturbed his peace as she roughly opened (and slammed) the door to their shared office. Theo sat back in his chair as he watched her grumble angrily to herself as she threw down her bag and spring coat. She had yet to notice him, and Theo wondered if he should clear his throat to make his presence known. As it turned out, however, she had known he was there and promptly asked him a question once she had turned away from her desk.

"Am I unemotional?" Hermione asked. Theo's brows rose high on his head, and he leaned forward with his hands cupped on his desk.

"The definition of 'unemotional' is the lack of emotion. To be cold, not easily excited or aroused. You just came in here on the brink of exploding, so no, I wouldn't say that you're unemotional."

"In that case, I'm buying Nathaniel a dictionary." Hermione huffed and returned to her desk. Theo was laughing where he sat, and he leaned back in his chair again, this time gently swiveling left to right.

"I'm guessing that your date with Nathaniel erupted like an improperly brewed potion?" Theo probed. Hermione turned a hideous glare on him, and he refrained from laughing further. "Why did he say that you were unemotional?"

"He was offended when I said that I didn't know how to feel towards him. Two dates, Theo. Two!" Hermione had finally collapsed onto her chair, and she was resting her head on the back it so that she could look up at the ceiling. "Obviously, I'm going to find you physically appealing if I agreed to go out with you in the beginning, but after that? I know nothing about you. I'm going to spend the first few dates getting the facts about you, and then, possibly, feelings will follow. That doesn't make me unemotional."

"Well, of course not," Theo agreed. "While 'unemotional' is probably an inappropriate term to begin with, all this makes you is logical when it comes to dating. There's nothing wrong with that."

"You would be the one to say that," Hermione replied, a small upturn of her lips present. She finally raised her head and looked over at the brown-haired man who wore reading glasses because his eyesight was shot to hell. "You approach dating the same way that I do."

"Pureblood ways, I'm afraid," Theo sighed flippantly. "You court for a purpose, nothing more."

Hermione rolled her eyes and finally sat upright. "That's really depressing, Theo."

"If you say so," Theo shrugged. He then smiled before making the proposal that had popped into his mind the moment Hermione had said her date had gone south. "Since you're free, dinner after work? Banana split with strawberries and a hint of lemon for dessert?"

"Alright," Hermione said with no hesitation. "I could use a treat."

Hermione liked working with Theo. They had begun working for the Research Department at the same time, and she had had absolutely no idea what to make of him. She had known of him from Hogwarts, but even then the information that she had known was very little. Theo had been a Slytherin, he had made impressive marks to compete with hers, his father had been a Deatheater, but he didn't follow in his father's footsteps. That had been enough for Hermione to try to put her best foot forward and make working with the man a tolerable experience. Besides, school days were finished, and they were adults now. The time for childhood rivalries were over.

As it turned out, and as his academic reputation had alluded to, Theo was quite bright. He was a voracious reader, and he and Hermione could spend an eternity discussing the first chapter of a book. All in all, Theo was an excellent work companion, and after two years of sharing the same office, he was also a beautiful friend. They often brought one another breakfast in the mornings, and when their tasks took them pass the normal work day, they ordered dinner to arrive and laughed as they ate. It was a friendship different from any other that Hermione had, and she cherished it dearly.

"Dating is just so difficult," Hermione said as she sipped on her wine. Theo's was hovering near his lips, and he paused for a moment before giving a lazy shrug.

"Not necessarily. Dating itself is just a concept like… Here." Theo pushed his wine glass to the middle of the table and gestured towards it. "You have a wine glass. A simple object that you pour a liquid into, and you can drink from it. I, on the other hand, can make it difficult by attempting to drink from the stem, or the bottom, or poking a hole through the glass and letting the wine drain out. People make dating difficult."

Hermione tapped her fingers on the table during Theo's exposition. With a small smirk, she cheekily replied, "Lovely analogy. Are you telling me that I should date air?"

Theo laughed, tilting his head in a nonverbal "touché." "No. I'm telling you that until you find someone who won't complicate the process of dating, it'll always be a chore for you."

"Fantastic," Hermione huffed. Theo shook his head at her attitude before pointing to the remains of her food.

"Finished?"

"Ages ago."

"You should've said so," Theo smiled. He hailed a waiter down and paid the bill so that the pair of them could leave.

The restaurant had a communal Floo, and so Theo and Hermione stepped into one and tumbled out into a well-decorated, sunken living room complete with a three-seater sofa, two armchairs and a glass coffee table. It sat on a large tan rug that obscured part of the hardwood floors. Hermione frowned.

"I thought we said no rugs?"

"You said no rugs," Theo reminded as he loosened his tie. He looked over at her and grinned, "However, you don't live here, so I chose to buy it anyway."

"For Merlin's sake," Hermione chided as she slipped her shoes off. "It's a beautiful hardwood!"

"And it's a beautiful rug," Theo argued back. "I've spent many nights sitting on it, back to the armchair, and with a good book. Try it, and you'll change your mind."

With her coat slung over her arm and her bag and shoes in her hand, Hermione's brow was comically high as she contemplated his offer. "Perhaps."

Stubborn, but wonderfully so, Theo had to admit. He led the way pass the chairs and up the three steps into the foyer as he loosened each cufflink and stuffed them into his pocket. The foyer was unnecessarily large, but good for gatherings if he ever decided to host something. Granted, that was few and far between. He liked his solitude with occasional company and preferred to uncomplicate it with others.

"Are finished furnishing the foyer or no?"

Theo was a quarterways up the stairs and turned to find Hermione still on the ground floor. There was a brown marble stand on either side of the door with a flower-filled vase, paintings on the walls next to them, and a chandelier hanging from the ceiling.

Theo gave the room a once-over and pursed his lips. "Maybe? I haven't decided, honestly. Should I add something?"

"Hmm," Hermione mused as she also looked around. "Yes, but I don't know what. Let me think on it."

Theo gave her a nod and continued on his way. Despite the size of the foyer, the upstairs wasn't anything too ostentatious. Three bedrooms, an extra room for a study with his large book collection taking up the most room, and two bathrooms.

At the top of the landing, Theo let Hermione lead the way into the study, and he closed the door behind them. Even though Hermione wasn't looking at him, he just knew that she had the widest smile on her face. She loved this room.

"Do you have anything new?" She asked as she set her shoes in a corner and her bag and coat on a neighboring chair. Theo walked straight ahead and let his fingers dance across the spines of his books.

"Just one. It came yesterday, but I haven't had the chance to read it yet." Theo plucked a book off the shelf and presented it. Hermione was behind him with her blouse undone and her navy blue bra showing. She took the book from his hands and read the cover.

"Muggle Medicine and Potion-Making: Where Magic Starts and Ends," she read as she wriggled one arm out of her sleeve. "Oh, this should be a good one. I don't doubt that there's a chapter on witch doctors in here."

"Or herbal medicine for that matter. Let me take that for you," Theo offered. Hermione had freed herself of her blouse, and now it was in his hand. He set it with her other things and finally rid himself of his suit jacket and shirt. When he faced her again, he found the witch still standing where he left her, but flipping the book's pages.

"Are you planning on standing up?" Theo asked with a cross of his arms and a wry smirk. Hermione looked up briefly, rouge on her cheeks, but she didn't move and soon set her gaze back to the book.

"It's never stopped you before."

"Touché again. I really must stop arguing with you. Can I help?"

"Sure," Hermione replied and headed towards him. Theo was mildly amazed at how well she could navigate while her eyes scurried across the book's pages, but then again he was just as adept.

Hermione brought her back to him, and Theo slipped the zipper down on her skirt so that it could fall to the floor in a neat flop. Her underwear had a lacy quality to it, and he ran a finger across its seams.

"Is this a new set?"

Hermione looked over her shoulder in enthusiasm and closed the book. "You noticed!"

"Of course, I did. I notice everything about you."

Hermione finally ditched the book, and Theo was trying his best not to turn red. Instead, he shook off a shudder when Hermione's fingers grazed his stomach as she undid his pants.

"You see, when you say things like that I can't understand why you're still single."

Theo chuckled and stepped out of his pants and underwear on the floor. "Dating is difficult, remember?"

With a gentle prod he made Hermione turn away from him, and a swift flick unfastened her bra, while a quick pull let her underwear fall. She instinctively backed into him, and he hardened as he left his hand slip over Hermione's breasts, a gentle twist and pull to her nipples, and continued across her stomach to settle between her thighs.

"People are difficult," Hermione corrected. She sharply took a breath as Theo's fingers grew busy with both speed and intensity. Her pleasure-filled whimper nearly drowned out his voice as he whispered, "Touché, yet again."

The moment Theo withdrew his hand, Hermione turned around in his arms and kissed him. A kiss between them was never purely sweet nor wild. It was an initial press of the lips, a centimeter break to return with open mouths and ready tongues, gentle bites of lip, some hard, all the while needing to breathe, but barely taking the time to.

The pair migrated from where they stood until they hit the couch and gracefully fell onto it. Theo briefly looked down at Hermione before once again bringing his mouth to hers and also slipping himself inside of her. He grunted when she wrapped her legs around his torso, pulling him in even further, and felt her smile against his lips.

Merlin only knew how many times they had defiled Theo's couch, or caused books to fall from their shelves, or, in general, made a mess. It was an interesting friendship that they shared, and they didn't question it. So long as neither was dating someone else, there would always be dinner with a side of dessert.

Author's note: My first Theomione folks! Dipping my toes in with a one-shot that was inspired from every awkward relationship and questionable friendship you may see on TV. I also have to throw love towards "The Brightest Black" by Enigmaticrose4 as I call to memory a brief moment in one of her chapters that I don't want to mention for fear of spoilers although it isn't really one lol.

Enjoy :)