Under The Bridge

I couldn't tell you when it started. When my heart started beating faster when he slung his arm around my shoulders. It was the same affection we had always shared, ever since we were whelps, but it wasn't. The way my eyes lingered on his lips while he talked, or the way his laugh brought a smile to my face. The way I lay in bed at night, heart in my throat, waiting for the quiet tap on my window that signaled his arrival.

It was late that night. I had already begun combating the sinking disappointment when I heard the sharp taps on the window. I flew from my bed, nearly faceplanting in my haste. Cursing myself under my breath, I extricated myself from my tangled mess of blanket. I crept out the door as quietly as I could, not wanting to face the wrath of Sigrid, should I be caught.

"Hey Ral." I greeted, trying my damndest to sound casual as my heart pounded so loud, I was certain the neighbors could hear it.

A slow smirk settled on his face, but his eyes remained sad. "Lo Had." He grumbled.

"What are we doing tonight, then?" I asked, wiping my sweaty hands on my pants.

"Dunno. Want to go for a walk down by the river? Maybe Ella will be skinny dipping again, eh?" He asked, nudging me in the ribs with his elbow.

I forced out a laugh. "If we're lucky." I lied cheerfully. I couldn't care less about seeing the cabbage farmers stick of a daughter naked. I followed behind him dutifully anyway though.

"How's your ma?" I asked, breaking the silence.

"She's getting worse. Gerdur keeps telling me it'll be any day now. Like I don't know." He told me, sounding bitter. "Like I didn't see this with Da."

I didn't know what to say. My parents had died when I was so small, I couldn't remember them. Ralof loved his Ma. Doted on her. He brought her flowers from the nearby fields whenever we went hunting. This winter had been hard on everyone, but even when spring came, she didn't get better. Ral didn't venture far from home.

"I'm sorry Ral." I told him softly. I touched his shoulder, but he shrugged away from me.

"That's life." He growled, plopping down on the bank petulantly. I hesitated before sitting next to him. I didn't want to upset him any more than I already had.

We sat in uncomfortable silence for a few minutes, before he picked up a rock and skipped it across the river. It skipped three times before it sank.

"Good one!" I complimented. He grinned, his blue eyes looking black in the moonlight. I could watch him smile like that forever. He kept his wild blond hair long, but had taken to pulling it into a knot at the top of his head when we worked at the mill. It was making its way out of the knot, strands framing his face as he went hunting for flat stones.

"I bet I can make it skip all the way across before you can!" He challenged, handing me some flat stones.

"Bet you can't!" I argued with a laugh. I tossed the rock as deftly as I could, and it skipped twice before sinking. I groaned. That was embarrassing.

When he finally succeeded on hitting the opposite bank, he was smiling from ear to ear. He hadn't smiled like that in months. "Did you see that Hadvar?" He asked me excitedly, pointing. "Had it jumped five times!"

I laughed. "That was amazing!" I agreed. "Bet no one has ever done that before!"

"Looks like I win." He drawled, his slow smirk back in place.

"Win?" I asked, not understanding.

"The bet. You bet I couldn't get the stones across before you." Ralof explained, his smirk getting bigger.

"Ah ah! We never agreed to terms!" I exclaimed, leery of that smirk. I had seen him send Ryn streaking through the village, naked as the day he was born, for losing a bet.

"That's your mistake." He grinned. He peered at me, pondering my fate. "I've got it!" He exclaimed.

"Yeah?" I asked nervously.

"You've got to tell me who you've been mooning over for the past month!" He declared smugly.

Panic flooded my system. "Mooning? I've not been mooning over anyone!" I argued. I could hear the lie in my voice, and I knew he could too.

"Horseshit Had! You've been all out of sorts. I know you better than anyone." He scoffed.

"I've not been mooning!" I protested.

"Is it my sister?" He guessed. "Ya sick bastard, it's my sister isn't it?"

"Course not!" I told him, my nose wrinkled up.

"What's wrong with my sister?" He growled, looking affronted.

"Talos sake Ralof!" I yelped.

"Well who is it then? Shaille? Ella? Mila?" He guessed, naming off all the girls in the village.

"It's nobody Ral!" I insisted.

"Cmon Had. I know it's something. You've been jumpy and I catch you staring off behind me all the time, like you're thinking extra hard." He sighed. "Don't you trust me? Aren't we best friends anymore?" He looked genuinely hurt, but I didn't know what to say.

I wasn't staring behind him. I was staring at him. I was jumpy, because I kept getting distracted by things I had no business getting distracted by. How soft his lips looked, or how strong his arms were as I imagine how they'd feel around me. How his beautiful eyes, the color of a summers sky, sparkled when he laughed.

I was snapped back to the present by him standing up abruptly. "Ral wait!" I grabbed his hand and yanked him back down. "Don't go." I pleaded with him.

"You don't trust me! Why would you want me around?" He snarled.

"Are you daft?!" I yelped. "Of course I trust you!"

"You won't even tell me what's going on!" He argued.

"It's not that easy Ralof!" I yelled.

"We're best friends!" He yelled back.

"Exactly!" I exclaimed.

"What? You're making no sense. Come see me when you're done being an ass Hadvar!" He jumped to his feet and started to stalk away.

"It's you!" I blurted out, and instantly regretted it. Stupid, stupid, stupid!

He whipped around and stared at me, his eyes narrowed. "What?" He hissed.

I shrank back, but knew I couldn't take it back. "I'm sorry Ral. I didn't mean to. I don't know why. I'm trying so hard not to!" I bleated out, horrified.

He yanked me to my feet and winced. When I felt his lips on mine, I was sure that he had hit me so hard that I was dreaming. His lips were rough as they moved against mine. He smelled like cedar and tasted sweet. He made a soft whine in the back of his throat and I realized that I was awake. I grabbed the sides of his face and poured all of my feelings into that one kiss. He broke away, panting and I stared at him in wonder.

"I've waited so long for that." He gasped. I just stared at him in wonder. I reached out and brushed some of his hair out of his eyes. I cupped my hand around the back of his neck and pulled him to me by his waist. I kissed him again, properly. I didn't stop until a shriek startled us apart.

"Oh! My! Gods!" Shaille had come upon us, her eyes wide. Fear broke over me like a bucket of ice water as she scrambled away. Everyone would know by tomorrow, midday.

"Looks like the saber cat is out of the bag then." Ralof sounded amused.

"She'll tell the whole village!" I yelped.

"So?" He asked with a shrug. I just gaped at him. He sighed. He cupped my chin in his calloused hand. "I love you Had. I'm not ashamed."

My chest felt like it would burst with happiness. "I love you too Ral."