A/N #1: I hadn't intended on writing any(*cough* more *cough*) fanfiction, but this story has been sitting in my head for about a week now. It takes place post Cas coming back (so mild season 7 spoilers), and he's sane now and whatnot. Oh, and whether he's on the road with Sam and Dean or not is up to you. This fic is rated for language, just fyi.
A/N #2: This is a Destiel fic. If you don't like boykissing, don't read. I don't know when I started shipping Dean and Castiel, but now that I have, I can't get enough. I'm not usually one to slash ship, but with these two characters, you kind of have to. It's just that the writers make it so easy for us that the are just BEGGING to be shipped! I'm thinking about making a presentation as to why people ship Dean and Cas.
A/N #3: Please, please, please review! And please tell me if this is in character - or, as much in character as it can be. I am super obsessed with being in character, so please let me know what you think!
Disclaimer: I don't own nothing!
Wish Series Part One, Chapter One
Wish
Sam had gone out to a bar. He figured Dean and Castiel had some "unresolved issues" that needed to be dealt with now that the angel was back.
**Two hours after Sam left**
Dean was laying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. Cas was sitting on the couch, staring at the wall.
"So…" Dean started, "that wife of yours–"
"Daphne," Cas reminded him.
"Right, Daphne. Did you two, you know?"
"No, I don't know. I do not know what you are referring to, Dean."
Dean sighed and rolled his eyes. "Did you two… do it?"
Castiel looked at Dean, cocked his head and squinted his eyes, still not understanding. "Do what?"
Dean sat up and gave Cas an oh-come-on-do-I-really-have-to-spell-it-out-for-you? look.
Cas looked at the floor, tilted his head, looked back up at Dean, squinted his eyes, then suddenly looked embarrassed. "Oh," he shifted his gaze down to the floor, "you mean forni-" Cas rolled his eyes, "'make love'."
Dean was going for 'have sex,' but he replied, "Yeah, that's what I meant."
Cas looked up again, then back down. "Yes. We made love on several occasions."
"Oh, that's – well that's good for you, Cas." Dean laid back down. Somehow Cas's answer seemed to disappoint him. "So I guess that means you liked it then?"
Cas looked pained. "Yes, I suppose so."
Wait, what? Dean sat back up. "You 'suppose so'? What does that mean, you 'suppose so'?"
Cas looked at Dean, then down at his hands. "It just – it just never felt right. Like," Cas's eyes flickered from his hands, to Dean, then back to his hands again, "like she wasn't the one I was supposed to be with."
Dean pinched the bridge of his nose. He couldn't believe he was going to ask this.
"Who-" Dean cleared his throat, "who do you think – looking back on it I mean – that you were supposed to be with?"
Was Cas blushing? He couldn't be. He was an Angel of the Lord for fuck's sake!
Cas cleared his throat and mumbled something.
"What? I-I didn't hear that."
Cas cleared his throat again, and looked into Dean's eyes. Then Cas said, with a terrified but certain expression on his face. "You Dean. I think I wished it was you."
Did-did Cas just say me? "Come again?"
Cas sighed. "I think that my … first time, was supposed to be with you."
Dean was speechless for a minute. "Me? Y-You an-… and me?"
"Yes Dean." Cas looked back to the floor and shook his head. "Never mind. It isn't of import."
"Not of import? Cas, you just told me that you wished you had lost your virginity. To me. I think that's pretty, 'of import'!"
"I'm sorry Dean. I shouldn't have said anything. I'll just, go, now."
"No Cas, wait!"
Cas was surprised, and slightly confused, "Yes, Dean?"
Dean got up from the bed and went to sit next to Cas. He sighed, looked at his hands, and started twiddling his thumbs. He was debating whether or not he should actually ask his next question, knowing that it would probably provoke a chat about feelings – something he hated more than Hell – but damn it he was curious. "How long-" he cleared his throat, "how long have you felt like this?"
Cas also kept his gaze on his own hands, "Remember when I told you that I was hunted, that I rebelled, and I did it, all of it, for you?"
"Yeah?"
"Yeah, well. Since before I told you that."
"Oh."
Dean leaned back on the couch. Wow. Years. Cas had wanted to be with Dean for years, even when he didn't remember Dean existed. Well fuck. This was turning into a goddamn chick-flick.
Without thinking, he asked, "Why didn't you say anything?"
Well crap. Do actually I want this to turn into a goddamn chick-flick?
Cas looked mildly annoyed, "Because you like women, Dean. And I am in a male vessel. I knew you wouldn't want to be with me. And I didn't want to risk our friendship. At one point it seemed that you were all I had. I-I just couldn't lose that." He looked up, "Couldn't lose you."
Dean inwardly rolled his eyes. A chick-flick. A mother-fucking chick-flick. He mentally decided to shake that off and go for it, but he still hesitated before he grasped Cas's right hand in his left. Dean rubbed the back of Cas's hand with his thumb. They looked into each other's eyes. Dean gave a small smile and leaned towards Cas.
Cas pulled back, confused and in shock. "Dean, what are you doing?"
Damn it Cas! Now he was going to have to talk about his feelings.
Dean took in a shaky breath. "Cas. I lost you. I really lost you. I thought you dead. For months, I thought you were dead."
Goddamn it, I sound like a girl!
Dean cupped Cas' face in his right hand. "I can't lose you again. I just can't. I need you Cas. I need you."
No, Dean, now you sound like a girl. Dean inwardly rolled his eyes, Gee, thanks, Sammy.
That little bit didn't stop a single tear from rolling down Dean's cheek as he leaned in again. This time Cas didn't pull back. The kiss was gentle, even soft. Cas cupped Dean's face in return, and brushed away the tear.
They didn't hear Sam come in.
"Holy. Crap." Sam finally managed to get out after watching his brother and the angel kiss tenderly for over a minute.
Dean and Cas looked at the intruder. Cas was surprised that he hadn't noticed Sam's presence. Dean was mortified. He and Sam stared at each other for a full minute. Sam looked at his bag on the kitchen table.
"Yeah, so, I'm just gonna... Yeah. Ok B-bye." Sam stammered as he grabbed his bag and closed the door.
~After Sam closed the door, he shivered, then turned toward the main desk of the motel. Wagging his finger at the door to the room he just left, he said, "Yeah. Not what I expected." He smirked. "I better knock next time I leave them alone." He walked towards the main desk to get his own room. Not that he would be getting any sleep, mind you, not with what he just saw.~
Dean half-turned back towards Cas, his eyes on the floor.
"Dean?" Cas asked hesitantly.
Dean looked up, smiled, cupped Cas's face in his hand again, and kissed him.
A/N: 4/25/12 Just reread the chapter to edit it. Nothing really new about the story.