Prologue
The nurse knocked softly on the door, and then opened it a crack and peeked in. She was sitting in her usual chair, feet propped up on an old crate, sound asleep, her head leaning against the side of the chair, her glasses hanging from a silken cord around her neck, the book she was reading open in the middle. The blanket had slipped off her lap and lay half on the floor; the nurse scurried in and picked it up, tucking it under her legs.
"You don't need to do that," the nurse heard her whisper. Startled, the nurse looked up into her piercing eye.
"I don't want you to catch cold, Ma'am. You of all people should be comfortable." The nurse smiled warmly.
"Bah!" She sat up and adjusted herself in her seat. "Girlie, I've been more uncomfortable than you can imagine; slept in the ruined remains of a house with nothing but broken wood to cover me up. Why once, I stayed in an old sewer pipe emptying on the Potomac, for five days waiting for some stinking Raider convention to move on!"
"What are you reading?" the nurse asked.
She picked up the book and flipped it closed with a popping noise, "Some worthless drivel written by some moron who hasn't got the slightest clue what he's talking about," she tossed it across the room with a strength belied by her frailty.
The nurse smiled, "Oh, come on now, Ma'am, I'm sure he's researched it. Right?" The nurse sat down in the chair opposite looking at her skeptical face.
"Well," the nurse continued, "At least he got Amanda's name right?" This was a topic she went on about quite regularly; authors always got the name of her childhood friend wrong.
A look of utter contempt passed across her face to be immediately replaced by a searching stare into the nurse's face; a glare so penetrating the nurse glanced down unable to meet her gaze.
"Her name was Amata, Girlie; Ah-mah-tah," she paused with a wry smile. "But you already knew that." She took a deep breath and sat up straighter in her chair, "Don't read that crap or anything else from them self-righteous, know-it-alls. Here's what happened."
Vault 101
The Adventurers
Amata and I met the first day of school when we were five. I walked into the classroom by myself; the teacher wasn't there yet, but several other students were. Immediately, some boy got in my face and started making fun of me; it turned out to be Butch DeLoria, he was always a jerk and his minions were always mindless drones.
"What's your name?" he grunted in my face.
"Esther," I answered. It was an old person's name, old like before the war; I don't think there was anybody alive that had it but me.
He guffawed loudly, his spit hitting me in the face, "What kind of a stupid name is that?" He laughed for several minutes, and then started calling me names, telling me how ugly I was.
I saw this girl come up behind Butch and smile at me, and then she got down on her hands and knees right behind him. Taking my cue, I quickly pushed against his chest. He went backward, and tripping over the girl on the floor, went sprawling with his arms flapping and slammed into the floor. The girl stood up and took my hand and we went over to her desk. Butch jumped to his feet and came running at me with some other kid laughing at him in the background.
"You bitch! I'm going to pound you " Just then the teacher came in with a complete look of shock across her face. She grabbed Butch by his ear and pulled him crying from the room. Outside the door we heard her voice raised and Butch's whimpering and then four solid smacks. A minute later they both came back in, Butch's face red and tear streaked; the teacher forced him to apologize and sit down at his desk. I looked at the girl gratefully and we introduced ourselves.
"Hi, I'm Amata Almodovar, my daddy is the Overseer," she said.
"I'm Esther Levine um my dad is the doctor?" I had no idea what to say, I'd never had a friend of any kind before.
"Good," she answered, "We stay together, and we'll be okay, forever!"
We were instantly best friends and were never apart as long as we could get away with it and did everything together. She was my best friend, closest confidant, and the nearest thing to a sister either one of us would ever have.
I was never considered a beauty that I knew of. Even as a little girl, in comparison to Amata's dusky skin, raven black hair and deep brown eyes, I was no match with my stringy red hair, watery blue eyes and pale skin. Although, when we got older, I got taller than average to about 5'9", which used to infuriate Amata and her 5'3" to no end. I wouldn't say I was hideous to look at, I was just plain; Amata was the one that was outgoing and got all the dates, I was the one that read alone in the library.
This, honestly, was fine with me most of the time. I loved reading books about history and learning about all the nations of the past and the way things used to be. I also loved reading stories; especially stories with magic and beautiful princesses. One of my favorites was the book Arabian Nights; I used to dream of being Scheherazade and having Aladdin or Ali Baba come and rescue me.
Both Mr. Almodovar and my dad switched off with raising us. My mother had died giving birth to me and Amata's had died of some disease when she was very little. It was second nature for me to treat Amata's dad like another father, although I never called him anything but Mr. Almodovar. Amata felt warmly toward my dad too but he was different than Mr. Almodovar; Amata called him Second Dad or Daddy-Two.
Obedience to authority was unconditional. It was odd because I grew up with the Overseer as a semi-parental figure and saw him in a different light than everyone else in the Vault, including my dad. But even still, both Amata and I had to obey; back talk was not tolerated. Duty, respect and order were everything to the Overseer, and he retained and enforced them severely.
Even though they both watched us, we were still left on our own a lot and Amata and I took complete advantage; we went everywhere in the Vault exploring every area we could get into; and we got quite adept at figuring out how to get into places we weren't supposed to, and equally as adept at fixing the stuff we inevitably broke so we wouldn't be found out.
Among the things our teacher, Mr. Brotch, taught was history of the United States and the Vaults. In the mid 21st Century, the United States government contracted Vault-Tec to build underground Vaults to protect the population from nuclear destruction. Each of these Vaults was designed to keep one-thousand citizens sealed for an unlimited length of time, until they were notified that it was safe to return to the surface; who was going to be doing this notification was never clearly explained to us. The Vaults were equipped with the latest in technology knowing that the people in them were going to be there for a very long time; our Vault, Vault 101, had just celebrated its 200th year since activation. It consisted of fifteen levels built underground, and reinforced to protect from the explosions.
Our first real adventure was sometime in February when we were both nine. We were exploring on the bottom level, in the sewage tunnels; I don't remember what we were doing down there anymore, other than just nosing around, like usual. This level was very dark, and we forgot to bring a light. It turned out to be a good thing.
At the end of the bottom tunnel, there was a rusted door with a large wheel on it that was sealed shut. We kept coming back to it to check on it. As we approached the door, we heard voices behind us. We looked at each other in fear; we weren't supposed to be down there. We scattered looking for some place to hide; wedging ourselves underneath one of the huge pipes, in a puddle of filth from the pipe. The voices approached, and we saw lights wobbling across the walls.
"What did they get?" one asked, it was one of the Security Officers.
"He said two, plus one of them weird two-headed things, some meat and a lot of scrap metal," another one answered.
This was definitely Officer Richards, a mean man who had threatened Amata and me with beatings if he ever caught us going some place we weren't supposed to. I gulped noisily, terrified of being found.
The two came up to the door and stopped, apparently waiting. Suddenly, there was a loud banging noise from the other side and the two men grabbed the wheel and with enormous effort and a lot of swearing turned it several times, finally pulling the door open with a loud squeal. When it was opened we saw the brightest, most unnatural light in our lives streaming through; the glare was blinding, and it seared across our vision for quite some time.
Five men came in through the door; following behind them was the most bizarre creature we had ever seen in our lives. From reading, I knew it was an ox but I had never seen one with two heads; it was pulling a wheeled cart loaded with crates. Behind the cart, chained by the neck and wrists were two women with very little clothing, followed by a sixth Security Officer with a gun in hand. Two of the guards from the front stepped back and closed the door and spun the wheel.
"Nice," said Officer Richards when the women went by. He reached up and grabbed the chest of the one closest to him. She let out a howl and snarled at him, snapping her teeth inches from his face, pulling the chain at her neck taut. The other Officers burst into laughter as he skipped backwards to avoid getting bitten. He swung his fist into her face with a roar making her nose gush blood.
The other woman laughed hysterically, smiling widely showing teeth that had been filed to sharp points. "This mouth was made for sucking," she cackled again, "Or you scared to try it out?" Both women burst into laughter and the Officer behind them jammed the butt of his gun into the second woman's back.
They passed on out of sight and sound and Amata and I lay there shivering, not knowing what to make of it all. When we were certain they were gone, we snuck out of there and hurried back so we could change out of our dirty jumpsuits.
At ten, we became Working Citizens and it was a huge milestone in our lives. My tenth birthday was kind of fun. Amata and my dad set it all up, and my dad being completely clueless invited everyone from my class, including those jerks Butch DeLoria, Wally Mack, Paul Hannon and the rest of their loser friends. He also invited Officer Gomez who I really liked, as well as his son, Freddie; Freddie was a quiet geek and I didn't like him anymore than any other boy. Later that changed quite a bit; he was always a quiet geek, but I got a serious crush on him and he was my first date and my first kiss.
There were several other kids there, as well as a bunch of adults that I was fond of; my dad got that part right at least. I got a lot of really neat gifts. One of the best was definitely the Pipboy; an amazing device that fit on the forearm. It was a little bulky but it more than made up for it by the number of things it could do. It was a tiny computer and hooked up properly it could monitor your body too. It was used to receive communication from the Overseer, keep notes, it had a light and you could even listen to the radio; although, that last was completely useless, the Vault radio station was really boring. The Overseer gave it me, but Stanley Armstrong, the head Engineer, modified it. The light was brighter, I could play my own music with it and it was able to hold a bunch of text in its memory; you know, books! I loved that thing.
During the party, my dad sent me to see his assistant Jonas Palmer in the reactor. Now, in theory, I wasn't allowed to go down there. Of course, Amata and I had been there several times, but I was still so excited to see what Jonas and my dad had done that I ran down to see what it was. My dad followed me, and when I got there I was just like a little kid.
Putting my hands on my hips, "Ok, what's going on?"
Jonas started laughing, "What are you doing down here young lady?"
"Can it Jonas, what are you two doing?"
"There's no hiding anything from you, is there?" my dad said as he came up behind me.
"We got you your own BB Gun," handing it to me.
I squealed, "Oh my God! That is so cool! Thank you so much." This was something the Overseer would have gone crazy over if he ever found out; guns were only allowed in the hands of security.
They showed me how to shoot it and reload it and for the rest of the day, I was down there shooting. I showed it to Amata that night, and while she made appreciative noises, I don't think she really cared as much as I did. I brought her down to my 'Shooting Range' a couple of times, but she usually just sat nearby and gossiped. I got to be pretty good at shooting that thing; I was even able to modify it so it shot straighter and with a little more power, killing a radroach in one hit.
The years passed, and Amata and I were still as close as two peas in a pod. Our work assignments took us all over the Vault, and we learned what it was that we liked. My favorite spot was the library; I spent endless hours looking at and reading book after book. I was fascinated by the fantasy and science-fiction books; amazing stories that set my imagination on fire. I always checked out way too many books and sometimes brought them to my work assignments, hoping I'd finish early or be able to sneak off somewhere.
I loved it in the Vault. Sometimes I'd get a little jealous from the stories I read, and I certainly always wanted to be Scheherazade or some other princess, but the Vault gave me everything I wanted; adventure and my best friend. The books about life before the war made it look so functional; the magazines tried to show how fun it was with pictures of happy people and exciting products, like motorcars, but I didn't believe it for a minute. How could they have been all that happy if they destroyed their world?
Amata, however, was the complete opposite; she hated it there and the books and magazines just made her want to leave the Vault even more. She used to complain to me often about how meaningless and shallow life was.
"Esther," she said once, "there will never be anything more for us. Don't you understand? We'll grow up, get married, have children and lead the same dull life that has been lived for 200 years!"
She flopped over on her back and put her arm over eyes, "I just want to go to the surface and see; look around, do some exploring. You know?"
"Oh my God, Amata!" I was aghast. "Why would you want to do that? Do you know what's up there now?" She shook her head. "Nothing! Not a single thing. The entire world is dead. You've heard Mr. Brotch; you've read the same books I have. You know they stopped writing after 2077; and why do you think that is?"
"I just want to look," she started crying. I held her in my arms not knowing what else to say or do, wishing I could make her see what I did.
Descent
I turned sixteen and that was the year we took the Generalized Occupational Aptitude Test and got our permanent work assignments. The G.O.A.T. was a completely ridiculous method of assessing the skills and desires we possessed to put us on the correct career track. With a Vault the size of ours and only about 1200 residents, whatever the G.O.A.T. came up with wouldn't be our only task, but it would be our primary focus. The night before the test I spent at Amata's and we pumped her dad for information about it and how the results were used.
"Come on, Mr. Almodovar! Can't you tell us anything? Just a hint?" I frowned at him, "Please?"
"Alright, I can tell you this. We take the results very seriously because we're fully aware if you're unhappy in your job, you bring the morale of the Vault down."
I pouted, "That doesn't tell us anything we didn't already know."
"Ok," he finally said, leaning back. "I will tell you there are 1000 questions, given in 250 question chunks, all day long."
Amata and I looked at each other and groaned, "No!"
He laughed, "Yes. The questions are all cross-referenced with each other so there's really no way to pre-choose what profession you're going to be assigned." At our puzzled looks he added, "In other words, you can't cheat."
"But what if it's something we can't stand?" Amata asked.
"In all the time I've been the Overseer I've never seen the test get it wrong." He paused and looked at us, and winked, "But just in case, with input from the other adults in your life and the needs of the Vault, I can exercise a little judgment and alter the result."
We pumped him for more information but he refused to give out anything more. Then we talked with him for a while longer about what we wanted to do and what we thought we'd be happy with. Finally, he told Amata and me to get ready for bed.
We woke up the next morning and got ready for school like normal, talking excitedly the whole time. What job would we get? Who would we be working with? Were we going to like it? Mr. Almovodar had left a note for us to go down to the diner; Mrs. Palmer had made us a special breakfast. The diner was a smaller place to eat; it's where I had my birthday party, where Amata and I went to get away sometimes, a lot of couples went for dates. It was cozier than the larger dining hall that was able to seat like two or three hundred people.
I left Amata to go to class alone and I ran over to see my dad before I took the test. I liked him, but we weren't the closest; he spent most of his time in his lab researching something or with patients, being the Vault Doctor. I saw him more out of a sense of obligation, but sometimes I could get him to talk about my mother. For the past couple of weeks I'd been thinking a lot about her.
"What is it, honey?" he asked me.
"Can we talk about, you know, mom?" I smiled sheepishly.
"Your mother, she... she was beautiful," He always got a dreamy look in his eyes when he talked about her. "But... beyond the beauty you've seen. There's just so much those old photos can never show. And she was passionate. About life, about love. But most of all," he paused. "Most of all she was passionate about you. When she became pregnant, it was the happiest I had ever seen her," he looked into the distance, wistfully. "Ahhhh... she had great things in mind for you..."
I lowered my head, "How can I miss her if I never even knew who she was?"
He shrugged and squeezed my shoulder, "It's a bond that a mother and daughter share; nothing can break it or come between it."
I nodded and went off to class; that was generally the limit of his affection. He meant well; even then I was sure of it. He just wasn't the most affectionate person, and I think he blamed me for his wife's death. Amata and oddly, the Overseer were the ones to give and teach me affection.
While I was walking back down the hallway, I heard Butch DeLoria's voice.
"I'll show you a real Tunnel Snake, Amata," he told her. He and all of his loser friends had formed a gang which they named Tunnel Snakes; very clever little Butchie was with his innuendo.
Poor Amata having to put up with this crap; she was constantly being harassed and not just by Butch. As I came around the corner there were the Tunnel Snakes surrounding Amata hassling her. I pushed through and put my arm around her waist.
"Did you forget who she is, Stupid?" I said to Butch. "If you keep messing with her, the Overseer is going to come down on your gang." Even though she explored with me all the time, she still had this helpless, girlie attitude; sometimes it annoyed me. Today, however, they were pissing me off and I stood to defend my best friend.
Butch pushed me back, "Better watch what you're saying, Levine." He turned to Wally and Paul, "Put something in her mouth to shut her up." They high-fived each other and Wally and Paul laughed and stepped closer to me.
I glanced at Amata and then scowled at the two. "If you can find it, go ahead and try." The vision of those two women chained behind the cart with Officer Richards flew into my head.
I smiled as evilly as I knew how making sure my teeth were showing, and I clacked them together, "I'd like to chew on those little knobs."
I heard Amata's sharp intake of breath, and the three boys backed off.
"You're a crazy bitch," Wally said, "I'm out-a here; let's go Paul."
"I can't believe you said that to him," Amata squealed, squeezing me in a hug. "Thank you! What is their problem, just because I'm the Overseer's daughter?"
"Jerks," I answered, "Plain and simple. They're too stupid to even understand what their saying." I squeezed her back and after a few minutes we walked into class, the last ones.
"Well, well," Mr. Brotch said as we walked in, "How nice of you to show up. Take a seat and we'll get started."
He turned around and walked back to his desk. Amata and I sat down in our usual seats and Mr. Brotch came back with a stack of test papers.
"Ok, here's how it will work," he started. "There are 1000 questions split into four 250 question chunks. You'll have as much time as you need to answer every single question; remember it is multiple choice and there are no wrong answers, so stop panicking. After each 250 questions, you'll get a 15 minute break." He looked around the class as he handed each one of us a test paper. "Questions?"
There weren't any and he walked back to his desk, "Begin."
As Mr. Almodovar said, it took all day long and was easily the weirdest test I've ever taken. Amata and I finished at the same time, by design. We skipped out of there and on the way out I 'accidentally' bumped Butch and made him drop his pencil.
"Good luck, Moron," I whispered, "You're going to need it."
Monday couldn't come around soon enough and when it did both Amata and I actually ran to class and were the first ones there; Mr. Brotch was surprised to see us.
"My word, now I see what it takes to get you two to class on time. If only I'd known this several months ago."
Finally, all of the students arrived and Mr. Brotch stood up from his desk and called us all to silence. For the first time in all the years I'd been with him, we were all instantly silent. He noticed it too.
"Well, well, I think I'll just stand here and enjoy the new found control I've gotten," he gloated.
"Aw, come on Teach," Butch shouted, "Tell us what we're gonna do!"
"Oh very well, come up to my desk one at a time, and I'll let you know." He turned and sat back down at his desk, waiting for us to go up. Amata's and my turn came and we stepped up to Mr. Brotch's desk.
"Well, Miss Almovodar, you'll be pleased to know you're on the Supervisory track. One day, I'll be calling you Overseer."
She actually blushed, "Oh no, Sir, I have no interest in going that far. But thank you very much."
We gave each other a hug and the thumbs up. Mr. Brotch turned to me and my stomach did a flip.
"Miss Levine, let me see," he pulled my paper to the top, and read it, giving a little chuckle; I looked nervously at Amata.
"You are to be the Overseer's new Personal Assistant. Imagine that, working closely side-by-side with Our Great Leader; how lucky for you!"
We finished out the rest of the week in class, mostly helping out with the classes of younger children. Although, each of us got packets from our new jobs explaining when and where to go and what we would be doing. Amata was going to be a beginning supervisor in the dining hall for starters, but was told to expect to rotate around every couple of months so she could learn everything.
Well, all of them received packets; I got a hand written note from Mr. Almodovar.
Miss Levine,
Congratulations on becoming my Personal Assistant! You have an exciting and interesting career ahead of you and we'll be working closely together. I look forward to getting to know you better and seeing more of you, everyday.
A. Almodovar
I showed it to Amata and she laughed; her dad was always so formal and polite.
On the final Sunday before starting our new lives and new jobs I woke up and my dad was waiting for me with a box.
"What's that?"
He placed it on the coffee table in front of me, "It's for you, from your mother. She told me to give this to you when you got your assignment."
I opened the box and the first thing I saw was a garment with a very bright, flowery pattern on it. I stood up and pulled it out of the box and held it at arms length; it was a dress that went down to about my knees with a button-up front. I knew of dresses from my books, but we weren't allowed to wear them in the Vault.
"She wore this?" I cried. It looked so exposed, in comparison to the jumpsuits we all wore.
He smiled and nodded his head. I put it carefully down on the sofa and looked back in the box. There were several more items of clothing; another dress, two skirts and tops, all very pretty but I think I would be afraid to wear them in public. There were also some heavy pants my dad called jeans, and four pairs of very feminine shoes which my books would call heels. I tried a pair on and when I stood, I started wobbling and sat back down laughing.
"These are going to take me quite a while to get used to walking in," I told him.
I stood back up and tried to walk around our apartment a little bit. I only fell down twice, but twisted my ankle painfully about six times. After about twenty minutes, I figured out how to walk very slowly, with short steps.
I looked at my dad, "Thank you so much. I'm going to go try everything on."
On the following Monday, after washing up and breakfast, I came up to Mr. Almodovar's office and rang the buzzer.
He came and opened the door and ushered me in.
"Have a seat," he said putting his arm around my waist.
I sat down and crossed my legs. He went over and got us both some coffee, talking.
"It's nice to see you so early in the morning. What do you know about my office; what I do everyday?" he asked, handing me my coffee.
"Nothing, Sir, thank you," I took it and blew on it before taking a sip. "I mean, I know that you're the Overseer, of course, but I've always thought of you as Amata's father."
He laughed, "Yes, well, hopefully you'll start to think differently about me. I really haven't had the desire for an assistant, until now that is." He patted my thigh. "Let me tell you what your duties will be."
We talked for several hours straight, and then I watched and helped when I could for the rest of the day while he did his normal job. At the end of the first day we left together and he walked me to my door and followed me inside.
"Esther, it is going to be a pleasure working with you. I look forward to seeing more of you." He gave me a hug and kissed my cheek, which completely surprised me, and then he left.
My daily assignments with Mr. Almodovar weren't all that complicated. If he left the office, I followed him with a clipboard and wrote down notes about everything he said and did, and the people he talked to. When we came back to the office, I typed them up and gave them to him. I kept track of all of his appointments and reminded him of when they were, setup meetings with the various department heads and answered the intercom. At the end of the day, I filed everything away.
He never walked me home again, but he got considerably friendlier during the day. When I got there in the morning, and brought his coffee over, he kissed my cheek good morning; although this changed to a kiss on the lips by the end of the week. When he would help me learn what needed to be done, he would stand very close, often putting his arm around my waist; sometimes he emphasized his points by patting my rear. In fact, he was always touching me in some way; brushing my hair back, putting his hand on my thigh if we sat together; it was uncomfortable at first, but eventually I got used to it.
Every so often, he gave me gifts. Sometimes, it was a knickknack that someone had crafted, or a piece of jewelry, sometimes plants or flowers from the farming level. Even though Mr. Almodovar was my best friend's father, and probably twice my age or more, I have to confess that I was somewhat flattered by the attention, creepy as it was. After Freddie Gomez, I'd been asked on two other dates and neither one of those went well. I was uncomfortable around men in general, and to have the Overseer no less, showering me with gifts and attention, I was flattered. At the end of the third month he gave me a box of pills. It only occurred to me a couple of years later what they really were, but at the time I believed what he told me.
"There seems to be some kind of contagion coming up from the bottom levels," he said.
"Oh no! What should we do?" I asked.
"There really is nothing we can do. The engineers are working on it. I don't want to start an all out panic, so let's keep this to ourselves."
"Will these help?" I held the box of pills up.
"Yes and no," he answered. "I've come to rely on you so heavily that I need to ensure your health, but there isn't enough stock for the entire Vault."
I blushed, and mumbled "Thank you, Sir."
"It's extremely important that you take one of those a day, and do not ever miss a day. The doctor, your father, told me that it may interfere with your ahem monthly cycle, but that's simply a side-effect."
I looked at the pills worried, and then back at Mr. Almodovar.
"Don't worry, Esther," he reached out took my hands, "Everything will be fine, just remember to take your pills daily." I nodded trying to smile.
"Oh, and don't bring them up to your father; I know how he likes to help as many people as he can, and he might be upset that I'm giving you alone the pills."
He spun me around by my shoulder, "There's a good girl." He patted my rear, "Now get back to work."
I began taking the pills the following morning, as directed. At first they made me incredibly nauseous, violently so. After about two months, that finally stopped but not before I lost probably ten pounds; I ate the bare minimum to keep me alive and relatively healthy. Mr. Almovodar surprisingly kept a close eye on me, making sure I was keeping up with the pills and trying to help me overcome my nausea.
From the beginning, he started having me work late, sometimes as late as twenty-two or twenty-three. I noticed if I mentioned to him that I wanted to go out with my friends, he would have an emergency project; very soon, I lost all contact with my friends, even Amata. The only people I saw besides Mr. Almodovar were his Security Officers and the Department Heads, and they treated me as if I didn't exist, most of the time. I was becoming very lonely, and regretting whatever answers on the G.O.A.T. led me to this job. I was retreating further and further into books from the library, and that became the only thing I lived for.
After working for him for six months, one evening everything changed forever. Thinking about it now, at the end of my life, I should have expected it. It's obvious to me he was setting me up for just this purpose. In a way, I blame myself; I naively fantasized about life through reading my books. Of course, Mr. Almovodar saw this and capitalized on it. But, at that young age, I hadn't a clue and with no guidance, I had no way of getting a clue. We were working late one evening as usual. He was trying to get the wording right for some new regulation for the sanitation department and I was dictating his notes.
"No, no," he grumbled, "that's not right. Read it back to me."
I flipped the pages of my clipboard back to the beginning of his regulation and started reading. Every so often, I would glance up and see him staring at me, intently.
"Esther, come sit here," he finally said, patting his lap. This actually wasn't an unusual request; he often had me sit in his lap during things like this, he claimed it helped him to think more clearly.
I walked over and carefully sat down; his hands went around my waist and I went back to reading his regulation. I could feel him squirming underneath me, which was unusual. Suddenly, he stood up and pushed me face forward on his desk. I cried out in shock and pain.
"Sir? Please! That hurt, what have I done?" In the six months I'd worked with him, he'd never shown any kind of violence toward me.
"Esther, I've had enough of your seduction and teasing attitude. It's time I take what is rightfully mine!"
My violation lasted over thirty minutes, the entire time I cried in pain and humiliation, in rhythm to his thrusts. When he finished, I slid off his desk to the floor and held my arms tight around myself, weeping. I had no idea what the marriage bed was like, but this wasn't even close to what I had imagined. I was ashamed and I didn't know how I was going to hide what I had become. All I wanted to do was die but I didn't think I could even work up the courage for that. Mr. Almodovar stood over me and zipped up his jumpsuit; I never looked up, I couldn't.
"Thank you, Esther that was very pleasant. Go ahead and get cleaned up, and come back in tomorrow at the normal time. We'll try and finish up this regulation then," he said, as if nothing at all had just happened. When I didn't get up immediately, he grabbed my arm and pulled me to my feet.
"Stop crying and go home," he said angrily. I grabbed my clothing from the floor and rushed out of his office, tears flowing freely down my cheeks.
Calling in sick was not an option, and so I returned to work every day; several times a week he would use me. It was never enjoyable for me, but after awhile the pain went away. Sometimes I tried to encourage him, to get it over with as soon as possible and I tried different things to get him to finish as quickly as possible.
It took another couple of months for me to find that the way to deal with the humiliation was drugs and alcohol. To get them, I used the one skill Mr. Almodovar had given me; I sold my body. I started reading more and more, losing myself in stories. I never understood when the women in my stories would describe love making as pleasurable, there was nothing enjoyable whatsoever; just them finishing up, and getting my hands on the booze or dope.
I tried contacting Amata, but she was always working, learning her new job as a supervisor. She never returned any of my messages and the few times I was able to catch her in the hallways or at home, she was becoming distant. The few conversations we had were stilted, and I couldn't bring myself to say anything; how do you tell your best friend that her father is raping you? The last time I saw her, I was high and had a bottle in my hand; she called me disgusting and closed the door in my face.
My father was spending more time in the lab. When I tried to go to his work to see him, he was always too busy to see me. Unable to see the people that I was closest to, I retreated further into books and used my body to get more drugs.
Escape!
I was pulled from a deep, drug induced sleep one morning and wiping the crust from my eyes saw that it was Amata; dimly I could hear the blares of the alarm system going off, and could see the reflections from the strobes in the hallway.
"Come on, you've got to wake up!" she was shouting.
"Leave me alone. I'm trying to get some sleep," I moaned.
"No! You've got to get up. Right now! If my father's men catch you here, I don't know what will happen."
"What?"
I looked around bleary eyed, what I really wanted was another fix. I looked down at the foot of my bed and saw the refuse from my previous night's binge; an empty whiskey bottle and syringe.
The strobes were really starting to annoy me; my head was already splitting and the constant flashing with that filthy yellow color wasn't helping.
"What happened to the lights?" I asked stupidly.
"Are you high again? My father ordered the Vault into lock down. Everyone's supposed to stay in their quarters and emergency lighting only. But you need to be careful; the radroaches have swarmed out in the darkness."
She looked toward my door, anxiously. "I had a few close calls on my way to see you. It was lucky for you in a way." She reached up and took my hands, pulling me out of bed.
"What are you wearing?" she asked, shocked. "Where did you get something like that?"
The Overseer came to visit me often at night, when my father was working; he would have his fun and then leave. Last night he had visited and brought something he called a garter belt and made me put that on with some stockings; it was rather uncomfortable and after he left, I just swallowed some pills with whiskey and passed out without changing out of it.
I looked down at myself, now horrifyingly embarrassed at my almost complete nudity, "It's just something..."
"Never mind, I was saying; security's been distracted dealing with the roaches, but that won't last forever. You've got to get out of here!"
My mind was struggling to comprehend what she was saying, and finally latched on to something, "Wait, why would they be looking for me? I haven't done anything."
"Your dad left the Vault somehow and now my father's gone crazy! Jonas is dead!"
Her eyes started to moisten up, "Please, Esther, listen to me like the friends we used to be before you... You've got to get moving before they kill you too!"
She had just said far too many things for my mind to grasp all at once; my dad is out of the Vault, Jonas is dead, Security is going to kill me, Amata wasn't my friend anymore. I picked the one thing my dim brain heard.
"Before I what, Amata?" I shouted. "Before your father started raping me? Before I turned to alcohol and drugs because my father and my best friend refused to see me?" I shrieked and pushed her away from me.
The look of horror that suddenly crossed Amata's face made me instantly ashamed.
"You didn't know, did you?"
"Oh my God, Esther," she managed to get out, shaking her head almost violently. "No, I didn't and I'm not sure... No, that doesn't matter. You have to get out of here." She turned and went to one of my dressers and pulled open a drawer grabbing the first thing off the top.
"Here, put this on. Where's your underwear?" She eyed me up and down. "Some decent underwear," she added with a soft smile.
I pointed to the other dresser while tears welled up in my eyes, "I missed you, Amata."
"I wish we had more time. I'm sorry I didn't see what was happening." She grabbed a set of underwear and brought them back over to me. "Hurry, get dressed."
While I was getting dressed something struck me, "My dad can't have left the Vault. That's impossible."
"That's what I would have said until tonight," she answered. "But it's true. He's gone and Jonas is dead and now they're looking for you!"
"Why would your father kill Jonas? That makes no sense."
"My father's men think Jonas helped your dad escape. They caught him and brought him to my dad's office and they... Oh my God..." She burst into tears and this time I took her hands and leaned in to hug her.
After a minute she took a deep breath and whispered, "I've missed you too, Esther; I was so lost without my best friend."
She pulled back, "I don't think they meant to. Kill Jonas, that is. As if that makes any difference. I think he must have distracted the guards while your dad got into the Vault door controls. When they realized that Jonas had helped your dad escape, they just lost it."
"I still don't understand how my father escaped. Isn't the Vault door sealed?"
"Well, that's what they've always told us, but apparently it's not. And you remember what we saw down in the bottom levels so many years ago?" I nodded. "I'll bet the doors have been opened for years."
She took a deep breath, "From what I overheard, he hacked into the computer that controls the door. That's why my father locked down the door leading to the exit."
I looked around my room and my gaze landed on my night table; a bottle of tequila and a vial of cocaine. The warmth I was feeling toward Amata vanished as I licked my lips thinking about the next hit.
"Even if all that's true... how did you get here first?" I asked, suspiciously.
She looked like I had just slapped her face, "Oh, so you don't trust me now? Thanks a lot. You think it was easy for me to get here? With the radroaches and security all over the place?"
"Whatever. In any case, I don't need any more of your help."
Amata turned an angry red, "Fine! You're on your own then, you bitch!" She threw a handful of hairpins at me. In my father's office, there's a tunnel to the front door; use those to get out." She glared at me, "Or don't. Lay here and get wasted as usual and then the guards will take you. Have a great life." She stormed out of the room.
I angrily watched her go, "Good riddance!" I shouted. "Make sure you tell your father where I am so he can use me some more." If she heard me, I have no idea; I was too angry to care. I did pick up all the safety pins though; I knew from experience how to break into doors here in the Vault.
I reached under my bed and grabbed a large cloth bag, and then went to my dressers, grabbing everything that my mother had left me. I left the Vault suits and spit on the lingerie Mr. Almodovar had given me; I wanted no memory of this life. I picked up my BB gun and slung it over my back. As I turned to walk out of the room grabbing my stash off of my night table. I put them in the bag in the main living area of my dad's and my apartment, as I went to the front door. I slapped the button and the door noisily disappeared into the floor and ceiling.
I peered outside my doorway to see if there was anyone around but the hallway was empty. I hurried out and headed toward the Overseer's office. As I passed by the communal bathrooms, further down the hall I dimly saw a figure running towards me. I raised my fists and yelled at it to stop.
"Esther, don't hit me!" He cringed; it was Butch. I shook my head again and tried to move past him. He grabbed my shoulders.
"You gotta help me! My mom's trapped in there with the radroaches!"
I sneered at him, "Up yours, I'm not going to help you." I tried to take his hands off me.
"Please! I know I've always been a jerk towards you. I know it! But you can't walk away and let her die! Just because I was an idiot. Please I'm begging you."
I was stunned; he must really be terrified. In nineteen years the guy had never admitted to any such thing and only apologized the one time when we were five and he was forced to.
"Why do you need my help, anyway? Afraid of a few radroaches?"
He looked honestly embarrassed, "Well yeah, so I hate radroaches. So what? I tried to go back and help her, I swear I did! But I just can't do it! So I'm beggin' you, please help her. I don't know what I'd do without my mom."
I clicked my tonuge. "They're just like the normal ones... only bigger."
"Yeah, a lot bigger; please Esther," he pleaded. The guy was almost in tears, but I had to get moving or pay the consequences.
"Here, take my BB Gun. You don't need to be scared of the roaches now." I patted him on the shoulder.
"Wow!" he answered, "where'd you get that? Okay, okay. Maybe I can do this." He took a deep breath. "Alright. I'm gonna go back in there and kill those damn roaches." He turned back to me and said "Thanks!" with the most sincere look I have ever seen on Butch DeLoria's face.
I took this opportunity to stop off and go pee; I hurried up and did my business, and walked out the other door; this one exited right near Butch's apartment. Butch was just walking out with a gigantic, triumphant grin on his face.
"I did it! I killed all the roaches, my mom's gonna be alright," he handed the gun back to me. "I know it ain't much, but here, take my Tunnel Snake jacket." He took his jacket off, and I swear it, he carefully put it around my shoulders like I was his date and just complained about how cold it was. He stepped back, and then leaned in and gave me a hug and kissed me on the cheek!
"Thanks, man!" He turned and ran back into his apartment.
I stood staring at the door to his apartment in shock; in all the time I'd known Butch, the man had not shown a shred of kindness toward me. In what must have been an extension of my shock I found myself thinking he was really cute, had nice, strong arms and his lips were soft. I shuddered; times really must be desperate.
I jerked myself into motion again and continued down the hallway and around the corner to where the diner was. I kept moving to the next door, where I had to go to get up to the Overseer's Office, stopped and crouched down, opening my bag. My shaking had never stopped since Amata woke me up; my hands shook as I fished in my bag. I know I shouldn't, I told myself as I pulled out the vial of cocaine. But it'll just be this one time and I'll throw the stuff away when I get outside.
I took the top off and tapped some into the palm of my hand and snorted it up my nose; shaking my head I sucked in my breath, waiting for the effect. I realized that I better get in motion, the fear and stress of the situation suddenly making me angry. I climbed the stairs and found myself in the hallway outside of my dad's office. A snarl crossed my face thinking about what he had just done to me.
"You abandoned me," I shouted. "I know I'm not the best daught "
Suddenly, I heard a voice to my left and I turned, putting up my fists.
"Hold on there, Missy! I just want to talk to you," he said. I screwed my eyes up trying to see who it was, my vision was fuzzy. It was Officer Gomez, I think the only Security Officer I actually liked.
"You're lucky it was me who found you. The others won't be so forgiving. I don't know what you're up to and I don't want to know. Just clear out of here and I'll pretend I never saw you," he said.
"And I'll pretend you don't work for a homicidal maniac," I barked.
"Don't think I don't know it. Why do you think I'm letting you go? I guess you're trying to follow your dad... outside. Good gravy, if I didn't know what the Overseer would do if he caught you, I'd never tell you to try for it, but it's your only shot. You take care and I hope you find your daddy."
He patted my shoulder and went back down the hallway. Eventually, I made it to the top level, where Mr. Almodovar had his office and his apartment as well as the front door to the Vault. I was extremely nervous, this really was it; I was going to step through that massive gear and out into the world for the first time in my life.
I went by the Security Holding Cell and looked through the window and to my surprise saw Officer Mack and Mr. Almodovar standing over Amata who was obviously cowering in a chair. They were talking and I watched them for a minute before I saw Mr. Almodovar nod his head and Officer Mack swung his hand and struck Amata across the face.
"Enough," I shouted, and rushed through the door and before Mack could turn around. I slammed into him from behind and took him off balance, but he was a solid man. I staggered back as Amata leapt out of the chair and dashed out the door. Officer Mack spun around sending the back of his hand across my face; knocking me to the floor.
"Thank you, Esther. You've made everything easier," he gloated. Officer Mack leaned over me and punched me three more times in the face; I blacked out.
When I came to, I was lying on my back in a bed, with no clothes on. There was an extremely bright and hideous light in the center of the ceiling and I closed my eyes again. My head was splitting, one leg was hanging off the bed and the other was bent and pushed up against the wall; I couldn't move my arms, they were tied up to the head of the bed. I turned my head and squinting looked around the bare room; it was the holding cell where Mr. Almodovar had knocked me out. Twisting my head and body, I looked out the window and saw five or six Security Officers standing in the office out there. One of them noticed me and pointed and a few seconds later the door opened.
"Ready?" he unzipped his jumpsuit.
I don't know how long I was raped, nor by how many. I got some sleep in between men, a little water, but no food. I had no idea what I was going to do; my arms were tied up in such a way that I couldn't even use the rope to kill myself. I was dozing fitfully again when the door opening woke me up. I turned my head and to my horror saw that it was Officer Gomez.
"No, please, not you too," I whimpered.
"I'm sorry about this, Missy," he reached above me and I felt tugging on the ropes. "Really I am. To think of how low we've come to do to this to one of our own young women; it shames me to no end."
"Thank you," I whispered. I pulled my arms down and rubbed my wrists.
"We've got to get you out of here," he said. He handed me my bag. "They just left it sit out there in the office; I don't think anyone's even looked through it. The animals were so excited to get you ." He looked apologetic, "Well, you know what they did; you don't need me to tell you."
I groaned as I sat up; every square inch of my body was in pain. I opened my bag and looked; they had been through it, the cocaine was gone but the bottle of tequila wasn't. I pulled it out and unscrewed the cap, taking a short but deep swallow. I wiped my mouth with the back of my arm and offered the bottle to Officer Gomez.
"Missy, I think I just might," he took the bottle and took a long pull on it. "I won't waste our time lecturing you about drinking too much." He smiled and handed the bottle back.
I took another drink and put the cap back on and reached into the bag again. I fished around until I found some underwear and another dress. Officer Gomez pointedly looked out the window while I got dressed and told me what was going to happen.
"After the ruckus the other night, the Overseer and us Security folks have been busy maintaining the peace. He's not in his office right now, and I'm the only one up here."
I finished and he turned back to face me, "Amata's waiting for you in her dad's office; she's going to get you to the main door. You ready to go?"
I grabbed my bag and followed after him to the door of the Overseer's Office. He turned and handed me a gun and two boxes of bullets.
"You'll need this more than any of us will. Good luck, Missy, and I'm sorry this had to happen to you." He patted my arm and darted off down the hallway while I put the bullets and gun in my bag.
I knocked on the door and it opened immediately; Amata stood there silhouetted in the light like a goddess. She pulled me through the doorway, closing the door behind me and embracing me in a long hug.
"Esther, I'm so sorry, you didn't deserve any of that " she trailed off, unsure of how to go on. I hugged her back, tightly, our fight the last time we spoke forgotten. Finally, she whispered that I had to get out. She stepped around her father's desk, and started fiddling with the computer.
Over her shoulder, she told me, "We were right, by the way. When I was looking for how to open the tunnel, I saw some stuff from when they opened the Vault and went and explored around the area. You should be safe enough, the radiation has dropped considerably. But be careful, he has pictures of these huge ants. Ants, Esther, which looked like they came up to my knee!"
She turned around to see me shaking, with tears flowing down my cheeks.
"Oh my God," she ran over and grabbed me again. "I know it's horrible but, Esther, you can't stay here. You know what will happen to you." She kissed my forehead, "Don't you understand? At least out there you'll still be alive and human, not some animal some sex slave."
I nodded, "I know, but I never wanted to leave the Vault; that was always you. I liked it here, remember?"
She looked at me sadly, "Yeah, but we need to get moving. My dad will be back any minute."
She ran back to the computer, pushed something on the keyboard and came back over to me, taking my hand.
There was some grinding of mechanical equipment and slowly his desk rose in the air and slid back, while an opening appeared in the floor underneath. Through the opening was a set of stairs to a short corridor that ended in a standard Vault door. Holding my hand tightly, Amata went down the stairs. At the bottom, she turned and slapped a button on the wall, and I looked back and saw the desk sliding back into place.
"Weird, isn't it?" she said, just like we were exploring when were younger. "Why would they make something like this unless they knew we were going to rebel eventually?"
We followed the corridor around and it opened up into the front entrance to the Vault, some place Amata and I had been to many times, but only to look. To my left was the Vault Door, that huge gear that kept the world out. And us in. We walked into the large chamber and I stood looking at the door, while Amata reached over and flicked some switches on a control box nearby.
A muted yellow light started rotating and a loud alarm blared; there was the sound of more gears groaning and grinding and a metal arm slid forward and latched on to the middle of the Vault Door. It clicked into place and suddenly the room was filled with the loudest screech I'd ever heard in my life, drowning out the sound of the alarm; I placed my hands over my ears, shrieking in protest myself.
When it finally stopped, Amata spun me around in another hug, "Goodbye, Esther, please remember I will forever love you."
She pushed me away, "Get going! You're looking for the town of Megaton; I don't know where it is, but I think its close by."
There were voices on the other side of the interior door, and I could hear them fiddling to open it up. I didn't want to get caught again so I turned and ran through the Door opening, into a dark cave. I looked back just as Amata had flicked a switch to close the Door, and two Security Officers burst through behind her. The Vault Door rolled shut with the same squealing noise as before only this time ending in a dull final sounding thud.
I turned and looked down the cave and saw a rickety wooden door and slowly walked toward it.