Because I wanted to post a less dark Pokémon story that involved Team Rocket, I wrote this.
Enjoy?
-O-o-O-o-O-
Team Rocket had blasted way off course.
"Where even are we?" Jessie grumbled when they regained their senses. From their vantage point on a grassy hill, they could see meadows and forests in three directions. Further in the distance were the mountains. Behind them were cliffs leading down to the ocean.
"Wherever we are, we ain't in Kansas no more," Meowth quipped.
James pulled out a map. "Let's see. We were just on Pummelo Island, then that twerp's opponent sent us flying." He traced their estimated path with his finger. "We couldn't have blasted off back to the mainland, so that means…"
"Yes? Yes?" Jessie and Meowth would have been on the edge of their seats if they weren't sitting on the ground.
James sighed. "I have no idea where we are." Jessie and Meowth face-palmed.
"Maybe we could ask somebody in town," Meowth suggested.
Jessie growled. "Where are we going to find a town in the middle of nowhere?"
A noise in the bushes interrupted their minor meltdown.
"What was that?" James gasped.
"Great. More trouble!" Jessie threw her arms up.
More bushes rustled. The trio tensed, bracing for a fight, as red- and blue-haired figures popped up from the shrubbery.
"Hey, those faces look awful familiar," Meowth said.
The trio scanned the growing crowd around the bushes and hill. They noticed an abundance of long blue hair paired with green eyes and even longer red hair paired with blue eyes. The women wore what appeared to be primitive hunting gear, with their hair woven into plaits dotted with large beads. The men wore simpler tunics suited for farming with their hair tied back in long ponytails. Most of them held raised farming or hunting tools. Every one of them bore a strong facial resemblance to either Jessie or James.
"It's like looking in a mirror," James started.
"A mirror that never skips leg day," Jessie finished, eyeing the toned and tanned physiques of the red-haired women and blue-haired men. "They look like they could be trouble."
All the blue- and red-topped heads perked up. A peculiar twinkle passed through every green and blue eye.
"Prepare for trouble," said one red-haired woman wearing animal skins. Jessie couldn't help but gape (even though it was impolite to leave one's mouth hanging open).
"Make it double," answered a linen-clad, blue-haired man. James tilted his head like a Noctowl.
Meowth snickered. "They're steppin' on all your lines."
"Oh no they don't!" Jessie muttered. To the crowd, she shouted, "All of you, prepare for trouble!"
James continued to stare, confused, until Jessie nudged him. "Oh, that's right. Make it double!"
"To protect our world from devastation," came the chorus of female voices.
"To unite all peoples within our nation," James responded unsurely.
"What the hell is going on here?" Jessie whispered to James and Meowth.
"Maybe they're just really big fans?" James ventured.
"Then why're they all starin' at us like we're an Aerodactyl with two heads?" Meowth retorted.
They turned back to the crowd. The expressions were ones of shock, but they also seemed expectant. The people were gripping their hunting and farming implements not in belligerence, but anticipation.
"Let's finish the motto first." Jessie turned back to the crowd. "To denounce the evils of truth and love!" she said forcefully.
"To extend our reach to the stars above!" the blue-haired men called back in unison, raising one hand in the air.
"Jessie!" The word was stated almost threateningly.
"James." Said with waning confidence.
"Jesterjade, hail!" was the enthusiastic response.
"Jesterjade?!" All three Team Rocket members dropped to their knees.
"Hail!" A blue-haired man in green linen wagged his hand and tittered coquettishly.
"Do I really sound like that?" James whispered.
"More or less, yes," whispered back Jess.
The rest of the crowd continued the rally. "Red and blue, blast off at the speed of light!" They raised both arms in a V shape, closed their eyes, and aimed their faces skyward. Their blissful expressions made the gesture look holy.
"Surrender now or prepare to fight?" Jessie and James finished weakly.
"Meowth, that's right." Meowth was too stunned to bring the spunk.
Half of the red-haired women turned to half of the blue-haired men and grabbed them firmly by the shoulders. "Let's go, all night!" they thundered. Then each pair disappeared into the bushes or pitched makeshift animal hide tents. Satisfied female cackling and falsetto squeals of pleasure echoed across the meadow.
"What in the name of Mew is this place?!" Jessie screamed as James caught a sudden case of the vapors. Meowth, for once, was speechless.
-O-o-O-o-O-
If I write more of this, it might get Blueshippy or Rocket/Queershippy. Just a warning.