Rouvelier watches Kanda and Lenalee with hatred. Why? They both represent what he could have had, but does not. They represent what he loved that he so heartlessly destroyed. But does he regret his actions, or simply the outcome?
Disclaimer: I do not own D Greyman. I'm starting to collect the DVDs of it but that's about it. I do not own plot or characters. If I did I'd have written myself into it as the heroine who shows up at the last minute, wins the fight and Kanda's heart while I'm at it. *Sigh* This is why I fanfic.
Anyway, this is behind Rouvelier's emotionless and annoying mask. I'm trying to make him just a little bit.. good… humane… just judge for yourself!
It was the voice again, the voice that haunted him every night. A child's voice crying out in pain and fear and confusion.
"Daddy!"
It was a tradition of the Rouvelier family.
"Please, Daddy!"
He'd been born with certain responsibilities. A legacy that he had to continue, the name held power. Why did that power seem so cold now? It wasn't his fault, it was destiny, the greater good.
"Why? Daddy!"
She just wasn't good enough. She wasn't chosen, she was weak. It was better that she died. Surely.
Whimpering, sobbing, "why?"
It was Lenalee. He hadn't heard the voice until Lenalee was discovered. He heard it when he watched her crying for help. It became louder when he watched her running away to try to find that person who would look after her and keep her safe.
"I'll do anything, Daddy. Please save me!"
But Lenalee survived. The innocence had chosen her. All they'd had to teach her was how to use it, how to push it to maximum power. The voice had had nothing, her body had rejected that which could save her. It was her own weakness, so why did it haunt him?
"I'm sorry Daddy! I didn't mean to be bad! I'll be good from now on, I promise!"
The voice should have survived. It should have been Lenalee who died. The Rouvelier legacy was far greater than that of a little orphan girl. It was Lenalee's fault.
Kanda Yu, it was he who destroyed Malcolm C Rouvelier's final attempt at rectifying he wrong. He who survived against the odds. He and his little friend who destroyed the compound that could have saved her.
"It hurts, Daddy. Please, please."
The failure who was destined to die was the one who survived, and the one who was well- who was successful- was the one who lost his mind. They were hardly human, pawns in his game and they lost the game for him. They were disloyal to the king on the board, and they wrote the future for the queen.
"I'm….sorry….Daddy….please…"
He could punish the one who had lost his mind. But the other- Kanda- was protected in the only way possible, innocence. He never lost a fight, he never let down his guard and he never let go of the damn sword.
"Didn't I help you at work enough, Daddy? I thought I was going to help? Why are you hurting me?"
Why did Kanda think he'd been created? All that time and money spent just to get him? They'd pushed on when there were so many failures. Kanda was a failure too. His life was limited! He'd wanted a perfect new body for the voice; death defying, fast, painless, an accomadator. The heart, she could have been the heart.
"NO! I DON'T WANNA TRY AGAIN!"
Lenalee wasn't perfect either. Weak minded, pathetic, she cared too much to get the job done effectively.
"Why do you hate me? I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME!"
These exorcists thought they had sacrificed so much. They'd seen death and pain and suffering. They'd fought to exhaustion, battled wounded and returned to fight not quite healed yet. Rouvelier had given up so much for the cause. He'd seen death and pain and suffering. He'd worked to exhaustion, found ways to avoid wounds, and discovered how to make people heal quickly. He'd given up everything. All he had left was cooking, a pastime they used to share.
His six year old daughter had given up everything for the cause. She'd experienced pain and suffering and welcomed death. She'd fought to exhaustion, clung to life and drowned in her own blood. Her voice called out in the quiet, calling to her father, who was walking away in disappointment. She was another sacrificial failure for the Rouvelier family. She hadn't been able to help her father at work as she had promised too.
Okay, now I'm going to go and cry. I thought I would try to understand Rouvelier a little. I guess it didn't really work. It didn't wind up as a story where he's not the villan lol, so I failed in my goal. Oh well, reviews anyway?